Best Uniform "Fail" you have had?

CDR Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 19 May 2015 22:14:29 -0400

Wore my summer whites for the first time in 8-10 years. The uniform was fine, and the shoes looked OK. Never occurred to me that the polish would have dried out. This is what they looked like after the drill weekend. Oh well. Guess I'll try cleaning them down to bare leather with saddle soap and then building up a new layer of polish. Anyone else have some colorful "uniform failure" stories to share?

Response by MSgt Brian Welch made May 19 at 2015 10:36 PM

MSgt Brian Welch — Tue, 19 May 2015 22:36:35 -0400

I guess black shoes hid more wear...

Response by SSgt Private RallyPoint Member made May 19 at 2015 10:38 PM

SSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 19 May 2015 22:38:33 -0400

Made it to PT formation with my PT pants on backwards once. I've never made it to formation with my tshirt on backwards, but it's been real close once or twice. Also put my wrong dress shoes on with ASUs once. Didn't notice till it was too late. Fortunately nobody else noticed either.

Response by MSG Brad Sand made May 19 at 2015 10:57 PM

MSG Brad Sand — Tue, 19 May 2015 22:57:40 -0400

Not sure if this really counts, but in Infantry OSUT we were getting in formation at a shower point in just our towels and some people were moving to slowly.

There is our unit...minus stragglers...doing Mountain Climbers in towels and flip flops. Lets just say that probably would not go over every well in today's Army.

Response by SPC Charles Brown made May 20 at 2015 2:52 AM

SPC Charles Brown — Wed, 20 May 2015 02:52:33 -0400

I have seen more than one soldier show up to a formation in the rain wearing the blue boots that were indicative of Future floor polish to "improve the shine". A few nights of remedial training on the wear and care of military issue clothing usually straightened them out.

Response by MAJ Private RallyPoint Member made May 20 at 2015 6:18 AM

MAJ Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 20 May 2015 06:18:17 -0400

I don't have a fail to contribute, but I just wanted to comment on the picture. When I was a cadet at New Mexico Military Institute in 2001, I got pranked by having my BDU boots (which had just been cleaned as we had just returned from field exercises) stolen by others in my troop. A week later, I got them back (the evening before we were to be in BDUs again), thoroughly coated with white polish. They were impossible to recover. I couldn't help but think of that when I saw the photo.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made May 20 at 2015 6:30 AM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 20 May 2015 06:30:50 -0400

I had a pair of black jungle boots that were shined to perfection. I could read my name tapes when looking down. I thought it would be a good idea to wear these boots to do a lube order on my truck. I dropped a big handful of grease on the right toe. Ended up throwing those boots away that night.

Response by SFC Stephen Carden made May 20 at 2015 6:57 AM

SFC Stephen Carden — Wed, 20 May 2015 06:57:51 -0400

I talked my way out of class one day while attending AIT at Ft. Huachuca back in 1990. Me and a few of my classmates wandered over to the "permanent party" side of post and I found myself in the clothing sales store. I saw a rack of brimmed felt caps (bus driver caps) and decided to try one on because I had always wanted one for my class A uniform. As I was admiring myself in the mirror, a LTC walked up to me, looked at me, shook his head and said "someday private, someday..." I was a little confused until I looked at the cap a little more closely. I had been standing in the MCSS, happily wearing a brimmed felt cap with "scrambled eggs" on the brim. These hats are generally reserved for the use of field grade officers, and had I known that at the time, I would have thought twice about trying it on. Postscript: the LTC called the schoolhouse and told on me, so I got in trouble later that day.

Response by SSG (ret) William Martin made May 20 at 2015 7:09 AM

SSG (ret) William Martin — Wed, 20 May 2015 07:09:14 -0400

CDR Private RallyPoint Member Do you even shoe horn, Sir. Maybe that wouldn't have mattered.

Response by SGT Bryon Sergent made May 20 at 2015 10:40 AM

SGT Bryon Sergent — Wed, 20 May 2015 10:40:55 -0400

I re-enlisted in 2010. When I left we were wearing BDU's Black boots and everything was sew on. Upon my return I have these crappy ACU's with Velcro everything. So Needless to say i had everything on wrong. Had my name tapes swapped and my patches swapped. Walked around Half a day like that before I had a Private in my unit finally point it out.I had the uniform facing me instead of me looking over the shoulders.

Response by CSM Charles Hayden made May 20 at 2015 9:47 PM

CSM Charles Hayden — Wed, 20 May 2015 21:47:02 -0400

CDR Robert Getty, I once neglected to check if the tailor had placed my blue trousers under the ASU jacket. They had not. My presence at the ball, was shortened cuz I was disgusted to wear Khaki's when everyone was in Blues!

Response by CDR Private RallyPoint Member made Jun 2 at 2015 11:00 AM

CDR Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 02 Jun 2015 11:00:04 -0400

During a change of command one summer on the deck of the USS MISSOURI, I moved from the parade rest and the heels of my white shoes, stayed cemented to the nonskid, and my shoes did not. Had to do the rest of the ceremony without heels on either of my shoes.

Response by CAPT Kevin B. made Jun 29 at 2015 12:51 AM

CAPT Kevin B. — Mon, 29 Jun 2015 00:51:09 -0400

There's a few that were EPIC. We had a dress white inspection at Port Hueneme. One officer forgot his gloves. So we had him take his socks off and put them on his hands. He escaped that one.

The best one was we had a blues inspection out on Treasure Island on a Sunday. The Regimental Commander forgot his tie and there were none to be had. Well, the Skipper came out wearing a tie. However the Ensign at the end of the line had a black sock stapled to his shirt. The Skipper complemented him on his outstanding uniform.

Another blues inspection at the hospital at Camp Pendleton always has a mash up of doctors who just never really got into the uniform thing. We had a senior shrink who came out in blues with a bow tie and wearing a women's beret because it looked European. Takes all types I guess.

Response by TSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 13 at 2015 1:12 AM

TSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 13 Jul 2015 01:12:11 -0400

I spent 6 years active duty Navy. I got out and transferred over to the Air National Guard. Well, the color of the PT shorts are exactly the same. I thought I had stored all my Navy uniform items before leaving for Tech school. I had an Early morning PT session and I was leading it that day. Needless to say I was getting chuckles and laughs while I was doing the stretches and warm-up. It was not until after we were done when one of my fellow Staff Sergeant's came up to and asked why I was sporting Navy shorts.....

Response by CPT Chris Loomis made Jul 13 at 2015 1:46 AM

CPT Chris Loomis — Mon, 13 Jul 2015 01:46:20 -0400

CDR Robert Getty Sir, when I was an enlisted Soldier I once placed my unit patch on my right shoulder by accident instead of my left shoulder. I was directing traffic in a parking lot when my 1SG walked over and straightened me out.... He took over directing traffic momentarily while I did push-ups right next to him...enough push-ups that it was hard for me to lift my arms and continue directing traffic.

...And I never did that again........

Response by SMSgt Thor Merich made Nov 17 at 2016 11:26 AM

SMSgt Thor Merich — Thu, 17 Nov 2016 11:26:03 -0500

I started my career in the Army and then after a break in service joined the Air National Guard. From there, I went into the Air Force Reserves. Apparently, I never paid much attention uniform regulations for dress uniforms. One day, I show up for work and find out its "blues Monday." I rush back to my room to change from my BDU's into blues. Prior to that I never had to wear my short sleeve blue uniform. I walked around for an hour before the SMSgt informed me that I had the wrong t-shirt on (a regular collar instead of a V-neck) and the wrong name tag (silver instead of blue). I felt like an idiot, but I am an expert on the uniform now as I consult the AFI's on a regular basis before I put on anything Air Force.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Nov 17 at 2016 11:39 AM

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Thu, 17 Nov 2016 11:39:21 -0500

When I was in the Marine Corps, circa 1990-91 or so, our unit spent a few days at Camp Smith, NY for a ceremony there. When we traveled, sometimes we wore cammies. I was a "spit-shine virtuoso" back in those days, maybe we all were. Well, my company First Sergeant had his boots brush-shined and they looked pretty decent. I decided to pull a prank on him. I snuck into the Staff NCO bay, stole ONE of his boots, spit shined that baby until it glowed like the sun, and put it back where I found it, next to the brush-shined boot. The next day, somehow, he knew exactly who had performed this act. I still feel the burn from the ass chewing I got 25 years ago. His other boot looked just as good as the first one before we left that base, I guarantee you. I never tried that trick again. But in hind sight,,,,, it was worth it.

Response by SSgt Michael Cox made Nov 17 at 2016 11:54 AM

SSgt Michael Cox — Thu, 17 Nov 2016 11:54:54 -0500

The worst I saw was when the Air Force went back to the new US emblems on the blues uniform. My commander wanted the entire unit in blues to inspect us and 50% of officers and 70% of enlisted had the wrong emblems on, didn't have all the ribbons, and a few even had stains and strings on the uniform jacket. Funny thing is at least we all fit in our uniforms since the last time the unit wore them was 6 years earlier.

Response by TSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Nov 17 at 2016 3:42 PM

TSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Thu, 17 Nov 2016 15:42:09 -0500

One time as a young and upcoming E2, I was volunteered for a mandatory wing fun run at 0600 sharp. It didn't seem to bother them that I was currently on Swing shift, and got home from work around midnight most nights. 0500 rolls around, 5 hours after I get home, and I'm searching for my AFPT shorts and shirt, bleary eyed and still mostly asleep, I walk to formation looking for my squadron, probably walk past 150, 200 people, before a nice lady pulls me aside and tells me to fix my shirt. I look down, and see the giant reflective AF wings pointing straight out from my chest, not my back like they're supposed to. Woops.

Another time, in NCO PME, we had Blues inspection. I'm quite meticulous about my blues, since I have an Akita-inu that sheds hair like none other. I quadruple check myself, avoid touching anything, and make it out of the house spotless, and make it to formation. The instructor inspects from the front, and everything is dress-right pristine. As they're making their way behind me to the next row of students, I hear "What the Hell happened to your ass? Were you attacked by a cat?"
Guess who forgot to lint roll the truck seat before sitting down in his blues?

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Nov 17 at 2016 6:11 PM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Thu, 17 Nov 2016 18:11:20 -0500

Graduation ceremony out of basic. First time in formation, we step off and march about thirty feet before the Soldier behind me missteps and scuffs up my new shiny shoes. I blame them because they did it to someone else on the way back. Aw privates, good times.

Response by James Adair made Nov 18 at 2016 10:46 AM

James Adair — Fri, 18 Nov 2016 10:46:07 -0500

i think you need new shoes

Response by PO1 Sanford Snyder made Sep 14 at 2017 11:24 AM

PO1 Sanford Snyder — Thu, 14 Sep 2017 11:24:36 -0400

This wasn't my fail, but I was the one who pointed it out to the victim(?). Standing squadron inspection back in 78', summer whites. I was with my division when I looked over to Admin Division and noticed something looked wrong with our PN1. Took me a few seconds and I realized he had his name tag and ribbons reversed. I discreetly caught his eye and nodded down to my chest. He looked at his chest and after a second realized what he had done. Yes, that crestfallen look of an experienced E-6 making a mistake. At least he was prepared when the CO stood to look at him and asked about it. This happened when I was PO3.

Response by LTC Stephen C. made Sep 14 at 2017 11:50 AM

LTC Stephen C. — Thu, 14 Sep 2017 11:50:43 -0400

CDR Private RallyPoint Member, I was once a Tactical Officer at OCS (a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away). An officer candidate rolled out one morning wearing two left boots (how or why, I'll never know)! Needless to say, we were merciless to the poor soul. We made him wear them all day, and every time another Tactical Officer saw him, he'd end up doing more push ups!

Response by MAJ Don Bigger made Sep 17 at 2017 11:24 PM

MAJ Don Bigger — Sun, 17 Sep 2017 23:24:24 -0400

My first assignment as a newly-commissioned 2LT was as aide-de-camp to the I Corps Artillery Commander. Prior to reporting for my first day's duty, I decided I would rather have my rank and branch insignia sewn on my fatigues vs having them pinned on. So, the night before reporting, I had my wife sew them on. The good news is that they were on the correct collars. The bad news--which I didn't notice until the Chief of Staff pointed it out--is that my FA branch insignia was sewed on sideways. Fortunately, the CoS took pity on me and kept me out of the General's sight. He also had me run some 'errands' which allowed me to get home and fix my mistake posthaste.

Ever since that day, I tried to be just a bit more understanding when soldiers I led made mistakes, knowing how imperfect I was. And that someone in authority over me gave me a chance to correct an error without making me feel worse than I already did.

Response by CSM Charles Hayden made Sep 18 at 2017 12:40 AM

CSM Charles Hayden — Mon, 18 Sep 2017 00:40:08 -0400

Ft Knox 1954. Guard Mount for School Troops of The Armor School. After hand carrying my spit shined, rough-out boots to Guard Mount, I leaned against one of the old brick buildings. The Officer of the Guard was awake, passing behind me as he was inspecting the Guard, he noticed a button of the poncho over my web belt had scratched thru the poncho when I leaned against the brick wall! Oh well, I had failed an inspection before!

Response by SSG Roger Ayscue made Jun 20 at 2018 5:32 PM

SSG Roger Ayscue — Wed, 20 Jun 2018 17:32:34 -0400

These look like the preferred footwear of the Good Humor Man, Marcus Welby, MD and Clarabell the Clown.
I am glad I had Jump Boots with my dress uniform. White shoes are more for the old folks home

Response by LTC John Griscom made Nov 22 at 2018 8:41 AM

LTC John Griscom — Thu, 22 Nov 2018 08:41:51 -0500

Prior to a parade, my unit put a liquid floor wax on our black boots to bring out a high polished appearance. Didn't know that exposure to the sun would change the polish to a white color.
Last time we tried that technic.

Response by LTC John Griscom made Nov 22 at 2018 8:47 AM

LTC John Griscom — Thu, 22 Nov 2018 08:47:01 -0500

Some people never realized that the braid on the garrison caps meant something. Saw a captain with a heavy gold braid on the cap he was wearing. He didn't know that particular braid was for a general officer.

Garrison Cap
In 1918 American “Doughboys” serving in France needed headgear that was comfortable to wear, yet could be stored in the pocket when the helmet was donned. To replace the service hat, the Army copied the French Bonnet de Police, an envelope-style fatigue headgear, and created the overseas cap, the predecessor to the garrison cap.
Officers Cap Braid
The 1858 uniform hat had branch-colored cords for enlisted personnel, black and metallic gold for commissioned officers, and gold for general officers. In 1940 the garrison cap converted the hat-cord scheme to cord-edge braid to trim the curtain of the caps.

Response by 1SG Bill Farmerie made Mar 12 at 2020 4:27 PM

1SG Bill Farmerie — Thu, 12 Mar 2020 16:27:58 -0400

After Desert Storm, my Battery was in an assembly area. We would be there for a few weeks. Our uniforms were still BDUs as we did not get issued the "chocolate chips" uniform. Well our Battalion CSM shows up in the "chocolate chips" to show them off and that he had them. He had sewn on the US Army and his name on the wrong sides. Once we pointed it out to him. He turned and got out of our AO with a purpose!

Response by SFC Bill Snyder made Mar 14 at 2020 12:20 PM

SFC Bill Snyder — Sat, 14 Mar 2020 12:20:06 -0400

Had a very portly 1SGT in he old Brown Shoe Army who fell out for Fire Drills wearing his Helmet Liner and old Rubber rain coat.