Can We Be On A First Name Basis Here On RP?

2015-10-16T08:27:14-04:00

I have not been called Sergeant Cunnally since 1961 & wonder if others would prefer being on a first name basis??....When I first became a member of RP and read some negative comments aimed at Sgt Cunnally I thought it was one of my cousins stirring up things here.. But then when I was blocked or got some "Downers"...I knew it must be me again stirring the pot..

Response by Sgt Aaron Kennedy, MS made Oct 16 at 2015 8:31 AM

2015-10-16T08:31:28-04:00

I'm happy to be called Aaron, Tom. It's a Peer network.

The "tagging" program defaults to Rank, FN, LN, and many of us stick to the traditional courtesies just because.

Response by LCDR Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 16 at 2015 8:35 AM

2015-10-16T08:35:13-04:00

Tom-I've not put on my uniform in at least five years; I've no pretensions of thinking I'm still "Commander Gillespie"...Josh, or "Dizzy" works just fine for me; particularly from veterans who have many more years of life experience :)

I think we default to rank because of the focus on active members, and preserving the customs and courtesies for their benefit.

Besides-I don't look much like that high-speed, killer of the waves I used to be anymore LOL!

Response by SCPO David Lockwood made Oct 16 at 2015 8:45 AM

2015-10-16T08:45:29-04:00

Once we take off the uniform it is not required to call us by our rank. We do this because it has been apart of our life and is ingrained in us. I also have no problem with someone calling me Dave, Senior or anything else! Just don't call me late for dinner! LOL!

Response by MAJ Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 16 at 2015 8:45 AM

2015-10-16T08:45:36-04:00

I prefer J over CPT or Sir...but I understand people want to follow military protocol, since it is a military social media platform.

Response by SSgt Robert Clark made Oct 16 at 2015 8:55 AM

2015-10-16T08:55:23-04:00

I personally could care less to be called sergeant or staff sergeant. I go by Bob and prefer that, I have not put on the uniform in over 20 years...I'm not a SSgt any more. I do prefer to call active duty by their rank until told other wise.

Response by Sgt Jay Jones made Oct 16 at 2015 8:59 AM

2015-10-16T08:59:33-04:00

I've been called Jay since 1974. However, the way RP is set up if you desire to respond to a post or "tag" someone you have to use their "Rank and Name.

Response by Sgt Justin Sloan made Oct 16 at 2015 9:05 AM

2015-10-16T09:05:17-04:00

Haha, yes. And for peer networking, the rank think kinda ruins that

Response by Capt Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 16 at 2015 9:06 AM

2015-10-16T09:06:38-04:00

Call me Don Capt, Sgt, or almost anything but late for a meal.

Response by SSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 16 at 2015 9:13 AM

2015-10-16T09:13:01-04:00

What about trying to call your supervisor by their first name when out in public out of uniform? Anyone else find this nearly IMPOSSIBLE to do even though you know your supposed to?

Response by PO3 Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 16 at 2015 9:19 AM

2015-10-16T09:19:05-04:00

Whatever, you can call me dude here too. That don't mean I won't hold it personal at all. :) Just be respectful.

Response by PO3 Steven Sherrill made Oct 16 at 2015 9:31 AM

2015-10-16T09:31:55-04:00

Sgt Tom Cunnally the first thing is that when you want to tag someone on RP, it automatically fills in their full name with title. Otherwise in a professional environment, during a first meeting it is always MR, or SIR. For subsequent meetings it depends on the culture of the office. For social gatherings, everyone gets addressed by their first name. If they get their panties in a bunch because of it, tough shit.

Response by SSG Warren Swan made Oct 16 at 2015 10:05 AM

2015-10-16T10:05:33-04:00

I don't mind either way honestly. All of us have earned the rank so if he/she wants to carry it on, I don't care. If the servicemember is still on active service, I'd still call them by their rank and last name until told otherwise.

Response by MSG Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 16 at 2015 10:11 AM

2015-10-16T10:11:54-04:00

Some old habits just die hard with me.

Response by CW3 Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 16 at 2015 10:13 AM

2015-10-16T10:13:18-04:00

I'm in the Army Reserve, but used to be active duty. While on active duty, I was called SSG (or SGT when I was) Walker by subordinates and seniors, but there was always an custom that those of the same rank were entitled to call each other by first name

I also juggle multiple roles here. On the civilian side of the house, I work for Booz Allen Hamilton, and everyone's on a first name basis. My job manager is Justin, my career manager is Troy, my government lead is Brad, my first line is Victoria. I wouldn't allow any of them to call me Chief...especially when I'm on the job.

When I'm at Battle Assembly, those subordinate to me call me Chief, and with one exception, those senior to me do as well. I don't really interact with them off duty, so it doesn't make much difference.

That exception? My commander. He refers to all warrants in the unit other than our senior warrant (a CW3(P) who's drank the Kool-Aid and lost what it means to be an Army Warrant) by last name only, as if we were buck privates.

Response by MCPO Roger Collins made Oct 16 at 2015 10:15 AM

2015-10-16T10:15:39-04:00

It is fine to have the former title somewhere in your identity shown, but my preference is to use the first name and many times in messages, that is what I use. If anyone wants more info, its easy to find. Anyone that wants to call me by Roger or Rog, have a ball. I do take exception to having the last name since in the Navy that is used to address anyone below the rank of E-6 and I passed that long ago. When someone uses it and is a current or former Navy person, its intended to be insulting. On occasion, in civilian life someone notices my former Rank (Rate) can calls me by my military title and starts a conversation. That is honor enough and I DD appreciate that.

Response by SSG Carlos Madden made Oct 16 at 2015 10:30 AM

2015-10-16T10:30:26-04:00

Hi Sgt. I think its just professional curtesy here since it's a military community. Especially since we have so many active service members. Entirely personal preference.

Response by LCDR Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 16 at 2015 11:01 AM

2015-10-16T11:01:59-04:00

This is actually a very interesting thought. I have thought the same for some time as well. Usually I am tagging someone when I'm talking about them, but occasionally I mention a name separately (or for a second time in the same post). In that case I still usually use rank to be safe. I know it's more of an issue for active duty to active duty interactions, but it's a forum after all, I wouldn't be bothered either way.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 16 at 2015 11:33 AM

2015-10-16T11:33:23-04:00

Tom, i've had my birth name much longer than my Army rank, so Rob is just fine with me!

Response by SN Greg Wright made Oct 16 at 2015 2:18 PM

2015-10-16T14:18:24-04:00

Sgt Tom Cunnally I generally refer to people as their rank. I do this because as a middle-aged vet, I'll get polite JO's (and sometimes even senior ones) who will call me 'Sir'. Which is wierd, to me, based both upon not thinking I'm old, nor my former rank, lol. So, I default to a person's rank because that's what I'd prefer.

Response by SGT Jose Perdelia-Torres made Oct 16 at 2015 3:45 PM

2015-10-16T15:45:30-04:00

I could care less personally, I will always be a SGT, but I will address people formely until othewise told in a message or post not too. And I got so many things to try to remember with my schooling that I will most likely forget and still address you formally.

Response by Capt Mark Strobl made Oct 16 at 2015 7:27 PM

2015-10-16T19:27:07-04:00

Hitting the "response" button will override any hints of familiarity with an automatic alert to our profile (rank/name). Issuing advance permission (like you need it) to address me in any way you (all) are most comfortable. Heck, I have a DD-214... left my former rank at the front gate of Camp Pendleton. --Mark S.

P.S. Someone please "down vote" me should I EVER use the term "Sarge."

Response by MSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 16 at 2015 7:28 PM

2015-10-16T19:28:46-04:00

I don't get caught up in it... It's a military forum for military people. Facebook is a better alternative if that's the issue.

Response by SGT Rick Ash made Oct 16 at 2015 9:33 PM

2015-10-16T21:33:19-04:00

Tom,
I would prefer to be called Rick and like you, have not been called SGT Ash since 1979. I have several friends here on RP and always address them by their first name. It's not addressed in the little yellow instruction box on the Home Page. It says Be Polite and Be Brief. Respect is addressed by the RP Command Posts. Well heck, I'm always respectful, I see RP as a collection of The Band of Brothers (and Sisters) I have only been here 7 months but I was still shocked to see a very close civilian friend on here with a tag that says "Civilian Supporter" and she is already in the Top 10%. Change is constant, I suppose RP is no different. I don't know if I can ever be "Brief" though.... :-). Great Post!
Thanks,
Rick

Response by SPC Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 16 at 2015 9:46 PM

2015-10-16T21:46:47-04:00

Being on the bottom of the pole in terms of rank and age, you could call me anything you want(seriously had Sgt who called me and another guy dickhead, got to the point we knew which one of us he was talking to lol)... Except Specialist, I really don't like my rank title. Maybe they should make it something like Master Private lol. I try and be respectful of my elders and hey, y'all earned your ranks why not use'm. I shall now issue a blanket apology to the NCOs of the Navy... I don't have friggen clue what to call you ladies and gentlemen most of the time.

Response by MAJ Matthew Arnold made Oct 17 at 2015 2:31 AM

2015-10-17T02:31:13-04:00

Call me Matt. Call me whatever makes you comfortable. Heck, I was in a National Guard unit the last 11 years of service where, excepting commanders, all the old guys were on a first name basis.

Response by SP5 Mark Kuzinski made Oct 17 at 2015 7:11 AM

2015-10-17T07:11:00-04:00

Just call me Kaz!

Response by PV2 Glen Lewis made Oct 17 at 2015 9:18 AM

2015-10-17T09:18:46-04:00

I kind of wondered about this myself since I haven't been in the Army since '71. I think not disrespecting whoever you're talking to is really what counts.

Response by SPC(P) Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 17 at 2015 4:40 PM

2015-10-17T16:40:38-04:00

I have no authority, just an opinion, but you can call me pretty much whatever you like.... Ike, Isaac, Jensen, hey you... I'm not big on the whole titles thing. The way I see it, if you treat people with respect, you don't need a title to demand it in return.

Response by LTC Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 17 at 2015 7:48 PM

2015-10-17T19:48:54-04:00

Steve is fine with me!

Response by SGT Michael Glenn made Oct 18 at 2015 7:41 PM

2015-10-18T19:41:03-04:00

Tom, I encourage people to call me Mike or Michael, to me the rank doesnt mean anything as I no longer wear the uniform. So rank and shoes are left at the door please!!!

Response by LCDR Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 18 at 2015 9:13 PM

2015-10-18T21:13:23-04:00

I personally don't mind it at all, and rarely care one way or the other. The only time I even consider rank at all is when people with "SM" beside their names are doing things that are blatantly in violation of the UCMJ. I don't care when my enlisted flight engineers call me "James" while I'm flying, so I definitely don't care if people on the internet do the same. Likewise, I call O-4+ "sir/ma'am" until told otherwise, but almost always end up referring to them as their first name or callsign. It is what it is.

Response by PO1 John Miller made Oct 19 at 2015 2:22 AM

2015-10-19T02:22:37-04:00

Tom, just don't call me late for dinner! :)

Response by MSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 19 at 2015 11:41 AM

2015-10-19T11:41:53-04:00

Sure Tom I'm Ron.
But i'm retired so have no rank.
But I would say that if you are communicating on this site with other active duty members you should always remember military customs and courtesies.

Response by Sgt Joshua Seavey made Oct 22 at 2015 2:08 PM

2015-10-22T14:08:07-04:00

Being on a first name basis is more of a courteousy thing than anything else. In other words, since you prefer that people should do it. But you have a lot of assholes that will call you what they want.

Response by SSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Nov 9 at 2015 11:59 PM

2015-11-09T23:59:13-05:00

I know I'd prefer being called by my rank by an of the active duty guys and gals.

Response by Sgt Tom Cunnally made Jun 6 at 2016 12:32 PM

2016-06-06T12:32:44-04:00

I almost forgot about this discussion that I started 8 months ago. I'm still not too comfortable calling any officers and/or Staff NCOs by their first names unless they say it is OK. But I prefer Tom instead of Sergeant and I never insisted on being called Sergeant when I was active or reserve. Although some young kids in the Reserves did refer to me as "The Old Sarge" because I was six or seven years older than they were ..God I hated that nick..

Response by COL Private RallyPoint Member made Jun 6 at 2016 12:35 PM

2016-06-06T12:35:47-04:00

A lot of people just use the tag: Sgt Tom Cunnally instead of just saying...Tom. Frankly, you can call me Shirley McFancypants if you want to...you're retired. I shall call you Tom; and sometimes Bill. I like the name Bill, and you look like a Bill. Don't know why. Most of the time I will stick with Tom. But, you're retired and I can call you whatever I want. You have that freedom as well. Best wishes, Love....Shirley.

Response by Capt Private RallyPoint Member made Jun 6 at 2016 1:25 PM

2016-06-06T13:25:34-04:00

Call me Sgt, Capt, Cap, sir, just don't call late for dinner.

Response by PO1 Tony Holland made Jun 7 at 2016 4:30 AM

2016-06-07T04:30:04-04:00

Immediately thought of a comedian on Johnny Carson, I think, --- Ray Jay Johnson or something to that effect.

Agree with your point --- probably most would be more formal initially.

Response by Sgt Tom Cunnally made Jun 7 at 2016 5:53 AM

2016-06-07T05:53:23-04:00

To all who responded to this discussion,

We have some excellent comments by active, retired, and veterans. It seems being addressed by our first name is a case by case basis. Also we should address those who wear the uniform by their rank. And Officers should be also addressed as "Sir" or Ma'am".
For those of us who hung up our uniforms, addressing each other by our first name seems to be OK with most.

Thank You,
Tom Cunnally

Response by Sgt Private RallyPoint Member made Jun 7 at 2016 6:34 AM

2016-06-07T06:34:44-04:00

I'll be honest, being on active duty on a page with other active duty members i would feel a little uncomfortable adressing a LtCol as "Tom" or what have you. That being said if you arent serving any longer and everyone else adresses you by first name i see no problem with it

Response by PO2 Kevin LaCroix made Jun 7 at 2016 8:41 AM

2016-06-07T08:41:01-04:00

As I am now a civilian, I am no longer Petty Officer LaCroix. First names just feel weird in a military based setting, even after 28 years. But Kevin is who I am.