Disrespect of Civilians and Veterans by Service members

SGT Chris Birkinbine — Sun, 17 Nov 2013 02:05:43 -0500

I have seen a lot of posts about the disrespect towards Veterans and those currently serving by Civilians. My question is what about disrespect towards civilians ( and sometimes even veterans) by active duty service members. Luckily I have not witnessed a lot towards Veterans, but I have seen quite a bit towards civilians. I think the lack of understanding of the military life entails, and what can and often does happen during deployments can cause a bit of cynicism and even resentment in the military population. Do you think this is ok, deserved, justifiable? How do you stop it? Should it be stopped? CAN it be stopped? Have you never witnessed what I am talking about and think I am full of it?

Response by SFC James Baber made Dec 13 at 2013 6:32 PM

SFC James Baber — Fri, 13 Dec 2013 18:32:12 -0500

There is always going to be people that disrespect others at some time or another, but it is a small percentage when it comes to the overall population on any military installation and the surrounding communities.

With said, the best thing that anyone could or can do is attempt to de-escalate any confrontation or situation, and avoid making it worse by being confrontational with the person who is aggressive in the situation. Sometimes if may be deserved, but in most cases disrespect to anyone, whether it be SM, veteran or civilian should never be acceptable or condoned.

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Dec 13 at 2013 6:59 PM

CPT Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 13 Dec 2013 18:59:37 -0500

I would just like to say I really think that those in the Army Civilian Corps should really be grateful they can get away with so much. I can't help to wonder how must of them are still employed. I have had so many issues with them that were bad they make me really question the whole system. Fort Benning is the worst. I have never been so disrespected in my life. The last thing I need is a civilian telling me that I don't know what I am talking about when I am actually a soldier and know their job better than them. I am getting all fired up now. I hate benning.

Response by SGT David Franson made Dec 13 at 2013 8:09 PM

SGT David Franson — Fri, 13 Dec 2013 20:09:41 -0500

as a veteran when I came back from viet nam I reall got shun and was hard to find a job or even make new friends

Response by SSG Mike Angelo made Mar 16 at 2014 11:46 PM

SSG Mike Angelo — Sun, 16 Mar 2014 23:46:22 -0400

I would call it dissent channeling. I can deal with it better that way...and  when I see it as fear of unknown; civilians to military and vise versa. Dissent and fear may go hand in hand. The term disrespect is negative interpretation, so I use a mental model (discipline) and move forward positively with it.  

Response by MSG Jose Colon made Apr 13 at 2014 7:56 PM

MSG Jose Colon — Sun, 13 Apr 2014 19:56:31 -0400

I believe that disrespect, toward military, DoD Civilians, Contractors, and civilians in general is a violation of our Army values.

Sometimes, our junior enlisted and NCOs act as if the world owes them everything. Guess what:

It was the WW2 Veterans who defeated the Nazis, not ours. Yes, I got it, you deployed, and you fought the Taliban, so did I. But that does not entitles us to being obnoxious and disrespectful.

Our NCOS and Officers need to do a better job teaching our Juniors the meaning of the Army values, especially Respect.

Response by SSG Mike Angelo made Apr 14 at 2014 12:04 AM

SSG Mike Angelo — Mon, 14 Apr 2014 00:04:38 -0400

I can ID with both negative and positive attitudes regarding DA Civilians. It is very real, these emotions toward each group of peoples; mil and civ. At APG, MD, DA Civilians got a union together during the Reagan era. It was authorized because of the many grievances that military post presented, yet it was controlled by a military officer, 0-5 and above to preside over judgements, as per Title 10, United States Code.

Response by SSG (ret) William Martin made Apr 14 at 2014 12:24 AM

SSG (ret) William Martin — Mon, 14 Apr 2014 00:24:42 -0400

I am respectful and polite to civilians. I remember a rude civilian who I made an ICE complaint about, and I did inform her of her rudeness and disrespect to me. When she continued to be rude and disrespectful to me in front of other SMs and her employees I informed her I will make an ICE complaint about her conduct. What she did next was spell out her full name in a condescending manner which I did not appreciate. To make a long story short, she hounded me for my CoC information which I kindly refused to give her, and I explained to her that she was not entitled to that personal information [this is how civilians get revenge either by only telling one side or totally fabricating event that never happened]. A few weeks later I did a follow up with her supervisor who told me that she was so upset that day of the incident she left work for home early and I even received an email from her. She did not apologize but she did tell me that I was welcomed to the library anytime.

Response by SPC Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 14 at 2014 3:05 PM

SPC Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 14 Apr 2014 15:05:10 -0400

As a junior enlisted, anytime I speak to another person (whether in or out of uniform), I always give the respect they deserve. I always thank other veterans and service members and when veterans thank me, I turn it around and ask them about their service because, right now, we have the world's attention and the Desert Storm, Vietnam, Korean, WWII and WWI veterans are slowly being forgotten. It is something that SM's need to take a sense of pride in.. Without them, there would be no us. They have paved the way for so many benefits that younger troops frequently forget.

Response by SGT Shon D. Hill made May 20 at 2014 10:27 PM

SGT Shon D. Hill — Tue, 20 May 2014 22:27:19 -0400

Wow, serious question and topic in general, but glad you posted it. I'm going to enjoy vet status and freedom of speech to say that it's just a delicate balance any moment, anytime, place, etc. Many civilians have some fear of us, justifiably so if close to "bad events, etc". Vietnam vets got worst end and those were our parents, mostly! I'm still angry at civvy America for that, occurred even while I was born, so "we" feel justice not in balance for that I think. America has become a nation of individuals, not cohesive, spend time in Central America to see people band together for the greater good! We don't discuss it much, but 10 yrs of war again! I think damage hasn't shown itself, it's gone rogue/black op and who knows the real fallout? Sorry, kind of dark, but I've been overly positive on here, time to say something more! PTSD sucks, getting better though :). A lot of healing needed now, I'm fearful of how and when, who, ugh..

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Feb 3 at 2015 11:41 AM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 11:41:41 -0500

So many of us active duty guys and gals will one day be government Civilians so I will start with that. I normally do not have an issue with Civilians of any stripe and disrespect of anyone is completely unacceptable. This is compounded if the Civilian is not Government/ affiliated and is a "pure" Civilian and was disrespected by a U.S. Service Member, as we are the face of what is good about our sometimes divided government.

HOWEVER..... I will also regale you all of the first time I had direct contact with a government Civilian. I was clearing Fort Bragg and went to a random office that was on my clearing paperwork. When I was there, I was told to wait for them to get done with lunch (it was like 1230) but I decided to do what all good HUMINT/CI people do and eavesdrop on these Civilian's conversations. This conversation was about how they have "bad" Soldiers because they forgot to take out the Civilian's trash and bad mouth their Leadership for not forcing their Soldier's to do it.

I will counter your point that for every one Service Member who disrespects a Civilian there are at least five government Civilians who do disrespect Service Members every day and we just take it.

Response by SGT Richard H. made May 16 at 2015 11:08 AM

SGT Richard H. — Sat, 16 May 2015 11:08:00 -0400

SGT Chris Birkinbine Everyone has contempt for someone or something, and it's usually based on some isolated experience in our lives....it could be civilians, men, women, a race, a government, a country, an income group...whatever it is really doesn't matter. The point is, when we have contempt for a group (in this case civilians or military) it is ALWAYS, without exception, irrational.
Best thing is to let it roll off. In my opinion this is one of the few things in life that if you ignore it, it will go away. Why? Because there is no argument in favor of the irrational, so for the rational, it's an automatic win.

Response by SPC Jan Allbright, M.Sc., R.S. made May 16 at 2015 11:17 AM

SPC Jan Allbright, M.Sc., R.S. — Sat, 16 May 2015 11:17:22 -0400

What civilians are we talking about here?

Response by MAJ Ken Landgren made May 20 at 2015 1:05 PM

MAJ Ken Landgren — Wed, 20 May 2015 13:05:29 -0400

10% of the world population are stupid assholes. Many times people will make an assumption and everything is based on the assumption, for example: My son went to Iraq and did not get PTSD, you can't have PTSD.

Response by SPC Private RallyPoint Member made Jun 1 at 2015 3:41 PM

SPC Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 01 Jun 2015 15:41:37 -0400

https://www.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid= [login to see] 860302&id= [login to see]

Some of them have it coming.

Response by SGT Michael Glenn made Oct 13 at 2015 2:31 PM

SGT Michael Glenn — Tue, 13 Oct 2015 14:31:54 -0400

I get this crap alot, I just had a few (last Night) chastise me for my views about the POTUS and was told its not fair that I can bad mouth him while they are not allowed to... NEWS FLASH!!!! I am a VET, I did my time and am now living as a civilian!!! I served this country just like everyone else so its people could live in a country of freedom which includes freedom of speech. I have been told I dont belong on this forum because i am a vet and no longer active duty, have the policies for this forum changed and its now only for active duty members??? If so show me the door and Ill gladly leave, if not Shut the fuck up and quit sniveling about your choice to stay in and not being able to have a potty mouth about your political thoughts, thats about as childish as it comes!! Grow a fucking pair!!!

Response by CPL Timothy Coffey made Feb 28 at 2016 9:09 PM

CPL Timothy Coffey — Sun, 28 Feb 2016 21:09:44 -0500

I have never been disrespected by a soldier, but if I was, i would put him in line. I am 50 now, and to many good men have worn the uniform to let someone make it look bad with attitude.

Response by Marla Brown made Apr 21 at 2016 11:00 PM

Marla Brown — Thu, 21 Apr 2016 23:00:43 -0400

I have not met many veterans in my life, though my stepfather and a few coworkers are. I had the unfortunate experience of dating a veteran who abused me physically and emotionally, to which point I am still attending counseling sessions to restore my mental health. I will admit that I ponder sometimes if ALL veterans' standards are like his. He's also a drinker and smokes pot, said he also did so in the military. He gets veteran's preference at his civilian job and acts entirely professional. However, in private, he picks fights with others and once tried to make someone pick a fight on me. I could make a large laundry list of all the different insults he has said to me, and then there's the fact that he doesn't understand why I had low self-esteem. Would a fellow veteran even accept this kind of behavior??