Does it bother you when someone says "Happy Memorial Day?"

COL Charles Williams — Sat, 23 May 2015 01:51:31 -0400

I personally get frustrated (hate it) when someone tells me happy memorial day; it started today. So, today, I corrected the first person to say that this year. Am I too uptight?

Memorial Day means something very different too us, than it does to most Americans; the other 99.55%.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/news/checkpoint/wp/2015/05/22/im-a-veteran-and-i-hate-happy-memorial-day-heres-why/

I’m a veteran, and I hate ‘Happy Memorial Day.’ Here’s why.

It's not Veterans Day. It's not military appreciation day. Don’t thank me for my service. Please don’t thank me for my service.

Response by SFC Mark Merino made May 23 at 2015 1:58 AM

SFC Mark Merino — Sat, 23 May 2015 01:58:59 -0400

Not in the slightest. I have a hard time thinking of any other way to say it. I just about drove myself crazy with survivor guilt and sadness. Our dearly departed loved ones don't want us to dwell on the loss of their life, but would rather see us get back up on our feet and lead a happy life. No one that truly ever loved us would want us to be depressed and to fail. We owe it to them not only to move forward, but to help others along the way. Don't ever mourn my passing my brother. I'd want you to remember any and every thing I ever did that made a positive impact on your life. I want to remembered for the thing (even if it's the dumbest thing) I ever did that brought you the most laughter.

Response by PO1 John Miller made May 23 at 2015 2:03 AM

PO1 John Miller — Sat, 23 May 2015 02:03:14 -0400

It does bother me, but instead of getting upset I take the opportunity to educate the person(s) who say it to me.

I usually say "I appreciate it but Memorial Day is for those men and women who made the ultimate sacrifice. Please save your thanks to me for Veteran's Day."

Response by PO3 Tanis Huston made May 23 at 2015 2:04 AM

PO3 Tanis Huston — Sat, 23 May 2015 02:04:59 -0400

I like you use to get angry,specially when it came from someone that should know what Memorial Day really is. Then someone close to me (My dad, former Marine) called to wish me a Happy Memorial Day,I had my own outburst, this is my dad he should know! He explained to me that it's through us that the memories of our fallen live and through us there is comfort in being able to say those words! After that I realized what he meant, I had a friend that is a fallen hero and I can't say to him how proud I am of his service but through those that still walk beside me I can and I feel I'm talking through them to him and all the others that where before and after.

Response by CPT Ahmed Faried made May 23 at 2015 2:15 AM

CPT Ahmed Faried — Sat, 23 May 2015 02:15:11 -0400

It just doesn't sit right Sir.

Response by COL Vincent Stoneking made May 23 at 2015 2:43 AM

COL Vincent Stoneking — Sat, 23 May 2015 02:43:19 -0400

I consider the intent. 99.99 out of 100 times, the intent is good - even if the comprehension isn't. As such I say "thank you."

Last year, due to the deluge of "it's not national BBQ day" posts on FB, I gave all of my contacts a dispensation to eat all the brats and drink all the beer they could.

Response by SFC Stephen Carden made May 23 at 2015 2:50 AM

SFC Stephen Carden — Sat, 23 May 2015 02:50:36 -0400

Most Americans don't even know anyone who served, much less paid the ultimate sacrifice. Maybe they had a grandfather that they never met who died in WWII. To them, Memorial Day is a free day off work that means beach season has started. To those of us who know the real meaning of the day, this may come across as insensitive, crass, or disrespectful. I am glad that my daughter doesn't understand the real meaning of the day. I am glad that most Americans have no idea what it really means, because that tells me that we are doing our jobs. Do you think there is one Iraqi or one Afghan who doesn't have a family member that died in war? Do you think in Serbia, Croatia, Somalia, or any of the other war-torn countries around the world, there is one child who hasn't been touched by war and death? Not in America. Why? Because of those that we honor on Memorial Day. I think those that have given everything for the safety and security of this country would be happy to know that most of those who we defend do not know the horrors of war and the heartbreak of a lost loved one. I sure am. I mean no disrespect to those who we have lost. I guess I just have a different way of looking at it.

Response by LTC Private RallyPoint Member made May 23 at 2015 3:06 AM

LTC Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 23 May 2015 03:06:39 -0400

A friend said it to me. I said that its not supposed to be happy, but that I know he understands that the days means and we know its a figure of speech.

However it got me thinking a little deeper. As with the death of a loved one, the funeral is frequently followed by a celebration of life. We are sad yet happy we had the privilege to know that person. As for our military people, we are sad for those who gave their life for our freedom but after the solemn Memorial Day service we can then go to our barbecues and celebrate their heroism that give us the freedom to enjoy that bbq!

Response by MAJ Robert (Bob) Petrarca made May 23 at 2015 5:58 AM

MAJ Robert (Bob) Petrarca — Sat, 23 May 2015 05:58:33 -0400

I generally say, "Have a nice Memorial Day weekend" I don't think I've ever said "Happy Memorial Day" to anyone nor do I recall anyone saying it to me. If they did I think I would just shrug it off as someone not knowing better.

We that are in the know and respect what the day truly means is all that matters. Yes, educating the BBQ crowd is a good idea but if we go about it with a chip on our shoulder, IMHO, will it make us look any better than some of these self righteous groups who clamor for other forms of acceptance.

Response by GySgt Wayne A. Ekblad made May 23 at 2015 6:46 AM

GySgt Wayne A. Ekblad — Sat, 23 May 2015 06:46:39 -0400

I don't like it and I use to take offense to it ... but, anymore, I just let it go. People who know me (family, friends, etc.) know better and don't say it. Other people? They probably will never understand anyway ...

Response by SPC Private RallyPoint Member made May 23 at 2015 6:53 AM

SPC Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 23 May 2015 06:53:42 -0400

Don't get on Facebook or Instagram.. At least 25 people have told me. I'm like hmmm... But on that note I'm thinking of my Grandfather today he was Lt in the Vietnam War and no longer with us.

Response by MSgt Private RallyPoint Member made May 23 at 2015 7:24 AM

MSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 23 May 2015 07:24:10 -0400

I can't say I hate it but it is quite annoying. The ordinary citizen does not understand the difference just like I can't understand the the difference between the colors off-white and egg-shell. Kinda like a liberal knowing the difference between a M4 and a AK-47. Their knowledge is very limited unless they are directly involved. They mean well but just need to be educated. Our school system will not do it, many no longer recite the Pledge of allegiance.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made May 23 at 2015 10:41 AM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 23 May 2015 10:41:02 -0400

Personally, no. I am not offended in the least. If I were one of the persons who were lost, I would want people do celebrate my life and what I meant to them, rather than dwell on the fact that I am not around anymore.

Response by SGT Anthony Bussing made May 23 at 2015 11:40 AM

SGT Anthony Bussing — Sat, 23 May 2015 11:40:30 -0400

nope...not at all...people just dont understand it....

reminds me of the line from "blackhawk down" where Hoot is talking to eversman...

" When I go home people'll ask me, "Hey Hoot, why do you do it man? What, you some kinda war junkie?" You know what I'll say? I won't say a goddamn word. Why? They won't understand. They won't understand why we do it. They won't understand that it's about the men next to you, and that's it. That's all it is. "

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made May 23 at 2015 12:30 PM

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 23 May 2015 12:30:45 -0400

It's kind of annoying. Mostly because it doesn't take much looking into to understand the difference between Veteran's day and Memorial Day. I appreciate the thought, but any amount of ignorance is annoying.

Response by MSgt Private RallyPoint Member made May 23 at 2015 1:13 PM

MSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 23 May 2015 13:13:24 -0400

No, I do not get angry or mad but I am a little disappointed. And I just try to explain the true meaning of Memorial Day. In hopes they too will remember and pay respect to the people who died while serving in the country's armed forces.

Response by Capt Private RallyPoint Member made May 23 at 2015 1:19 PM

Capt Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 23 May 2015 13:19:00 -0400

I don't get offended, I believe when people say "Happy Memorial Day" they are not trying to insult the occasion, just merely trying to tell you to enjoy the time off. I've lost Airmen in combat and I think of them all the time and I choose to remember them on how they lived and not dwell on how they past. So in summary, not offended in any form, shape, or fashion...actually driving down to the beach right now with my family to enjoy this 4 day break.

Response by SSG John Jensen made May 23 at 2015 1:52 PM

SSG John Jensen — Sat, 23 May 2015 13:52:08 -0400

i'm sort of connected to a group for whom all of the holidays are not the meaning of the holidays, it was created for our conventions!!, partially why I left that group.

spend some time at the Civil War gravesites, that is what "Decoration Day" was created for - for me to celabrate properly I would have to drive 500 miles to Or to Great-great-grandfather Keller's gravesite, my Civil War ancestor

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made May 23 at 2015 2:14 PM

CPT Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 23 May 2015 14:14:48 -0400

It urks me a bit. I wish they would understand what the holiday is about in the first place. It is like asking your Muslim friend is he wants go out and eat during Ramaḍān. It just isn't something that really makes sense. But then I am sure if you asked many people on the Fourth of July what year did we claim our independence they wouldn't know it either.

Response by MAJ Raúl Rovira made May 23 at 2015 3:00 PM

MAJ Raúl Rovira — Sat, 23 May 2015 15:00:37 -0400

I have to consider the good intentions behind the statement. Some folks may not have the right words to express it.

Response by 1LT William Clardy made May 23 at 2015 5:31 PM

1LT William Clardy — Sat, 23 May 2015 17:31:24 -0400

Can't say that I've ever heard anybody say that.

Then again, my sons learned very early in life how to explain the difference between Memorial Day and Veteran's Day to folks who would try telling their father that Memorial Day was meant to honor veterans like him...

Response by SrA Edward Vong made May 23 at 2015 6:44 PM

SrA Edward Vong — Sat, 23 May 2015 18:44:05 -0400

I have yet to hear "Happy Memorial Day". Usually it's "have a good long weekend" which I don't really mind.

Response by PFC Courtney Hilliard made May 23 at 2015 7:10 PM

PFC Courtney Hilliard — Sat, 23 May 2015 19:10:45 -0400

Not at all. I've spent the last week posting things on my social media sites explaining the difference between Memorial Day and Veterans Day. I've also been asking my friends not to tell veterans thank you, and why, for the last week.

It's simply a case of ignorance. If they aren't educated to know the appropriate responses to the appropriate holidays, then how can they give them? As long as you're not rude about it, have at.

Response by CSM William Payne made May 23 at 2015 7:15 PM

CSM William Payne — Sat, 23 May 2015 19:15:05 -0400

Memorial Day. The holiday set aside for for us to remember those who "gave the last full measure of devotion" in the service of their country. In almost 100 years of service for my immediate family we have been fortunate to serve without having to make that ultimate sacrifice. This is not true of my direct family though, I lost a cousin, James Oates, who was washed overboard off a troop transport in the Pacific at the end of World War II. I personally dedicate this weekend to him and all of the men and women that paid the price that we shall remain free. Sometime this weekend, please take time to reflect, pray for, or raise a glass to toast to those no longer with us to enjoy our fortunes. Below is the last part of Abraham Lincoln's Gettysburg Address. Nobody before or since has spoke of this sacrifice any more eloquently.

CSM Joe Payne USA Retired

The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here. It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us -- that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion -- that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain -- that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom -- and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.

Abraham Lincoln
November 19, 1863

Response by SGT Jimmy Carpenter made May 23 at 2015 9:06 PM

SGT Jimmy Carpenter — Sat, 23 May 2015 21:06:30 -0400

This is the FB status I posted the other day. It used to bother me when someone said Happy Memorial Day but I had a realization, I've got a lot to be happy about. You know what else? If my buddies were still alive, they'd be enjoying this holiday weekend and that's exactly what I plan on doing. They will be in my thoughts, just as they are every day but they wouldn't want me to sit around being sad and depressed all weekend.

Response by Sgt Private RallyPoint Member made May 23 at 2015 9:12 PM

Sgt Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 23 May 2015 21:12:59 -0400

I can't recall anyone ever telling me to have a Happy Memorial Day. If they ever do, I will not like it, but will not correct the person. Memorial Day is a time of reflection for fallen comrades, but not the only day that I do this.

Response by CPO Joseph Grant made May 23 at 2015 10:15 PM

CPO Joseph Grant — Sat, 23 May 2015 22:15:41 -0400

Memorial Day is for the fallen. It's not for free meals, sales, insincere platitudes etc.

Response by SGT Lawrence Corser made May 23 at 2015 10:56 PM

SGT Lawrence Corser — Sat, 23 May 2015 22:56:34 -0400

Yeah, A little. I try to say thank the ones who never came home

Response by Capt Mark Strobl made May 24 at 2015 12:52 AM

Capt Mark Strobl — Sun, 24 May 2015 00:52:56 -0400

Does it bother me? Naw. When I do hear "Happy Memorial Day!," I do slightly grit my teeth, force a smile, and respond with a "Thanks." I equate this to people who say something dumb at a funeral. Some just don't understand the relationship(s) among veterans and are, inadvertently, blissful --Errant choice of words but with really good intentions.

Response by SSgt Tess Landis made May 24 at 2015 9:54 AM

SSgt Tess Landis — Sun, 24 May 2015 09:54:44 -0400

I say yes it is a happy memorial day because it is the day of my mother or daughters birth but it is a sad day because someone had to die this day to fight for my country. My Poppa was Iwo Jima he received a purple heart, was shot 2 times the 2nd time he was shot Ira Hayes carried him down the hill. Is it a happy day yes because I celebrate the birth of my daughter and the birth of my mother even though she is gone now. However; I mourn the loss of all those who have died for me and have died for my country.

Response by Sgt Jay Jones made May 24 at 2015 10:45 PM

Sgt Jay Jones — Sun, 24 May 2015 22:45:46 -0400

Yes, as many prepare for backyard BBQ's and fun with friends and family, let's not forget the true meaning of Memorial Day. It's not to recognize Veterans, that is done on Veterans Day November 11th. We do appreciate the acknowledgement. The true meaning is to give honor and recognition to those who have made the supreme sacrifice in defense of this land we all love. Everyone who has ever put on a uniform and raised their hand and swore to protect and defend this country against all enemies foreign and domestic took a chance that they would not survive. These brave men and women entombed in National Cemeteries nationwide such as Arlington National Cemetary made that sacrifice. To them I say a humble and heartfelt thank you.

Response by 1LT William Clardy made May 25 at 2015 8:05 AM

1LT William Clardy — Mon, 25 May 2015 08:05:55 -0400

The Washington Post seems to be on a roll this weekend, COL Charles Williams:

http://www.washingtonpost.com/sports/nationals/military-tributes-at-baseball-games-true-honors-or-hollow-gestures/2015/05/23/3dc36364-0154-11e5-833c-a2de05b6b2a4_story.html

As military tributes become routine at ballparks, new doubts about sincerity

The ceremonies have become so ubiquitous — and branded — that some ask if they’re hollow gestures.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made May 25 at 2015 8:59 AM

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 25 May 2015 08:59:10 -0400

One should not be offended, they are the Happy for US

Response by SGT David T. made May 25 at 2015 9:05 AM

SGT David T. — Mon, 25 May 2015 09:05:21 -0400

I personally can't stand it. Admittedly I am at a loss on what would be more appropriate. I really get uncomfortable when people thank me for my service on Memorial day because it isn't about me. It's about our absent friends and all our fallen brothers and sisters.

Response by MSG Morgan Fiszel, CPCM, CFCM made May 25 at 2015 9:37 AM

MSG Morgan Fiszel, CPCM, CFCM — Mon, 25 May 2015 09:37:41 -0400

Happy and Memorial Day are polar opposites. Nothing about the day is happy. Being thankful, appreciative, showing respect, giving some time: these things are a better choice of words.

Response by SGT Rick Ash made May 25 at 2015 6:00 PM

SGT Rick Ash — Mon, 25 May 2015 18:00:05 -0400

It does bother me a bit. Enough so that I will instruct the person whom said it on what the Holiday means to a Veteran and I will always suggest that if they KNOW you are a veteran a simple "On this day I thank You for your service" will do. No one has ever become mad or flustered. Many people are appreciative of the fact I corrected their approach.

For me, it is a solemn day. I thankfully have only two graves to visit from lives lost during a conflict. Then both grandfathers' graves as they served in WWII. I still have an Uncle living from the Korean War. Or was that a "conflict" too? I get to see him in 3 weeks and as a veteran he will share another story with me about the incredible cold and the tactics of the North Koreans and the Chicoms. He was indeed part of the "Frozen Chosun".

Unfortunately, both of Terry's parent have passed away and mine are the only flowers. Dickie however, still has both parents and they never fail to "decorate" his grave.

"Happy" is used for celebratory days. Memorial day is for remembering and paying respects to those passed and living. Our church has attendance of roughly 250 but the membership roles show 206. Either way there are only 10 of us that go onstage at church when the minister calls for all veterans to come forward. Of that number, 6 are WWII vets, 3 are Nam vets (including me) and 1 is currently fulfilling a 3 year ARMY enlistment at Ft. Knox.

At this very moment I have 30 or more people in my backyard for Memorial Day. At dark we will form a circle, hold hands and we will take turns saying prayers.

Response by SFC Collin McMillion made May 25 at 2015 8:58 PM

SFC Collin McMillion — Mon, 25 May 2015 20:58:20 -0400

To me it is not a day of happiness, but a day of remembrance for those who went before us.

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made May 25 at 2015 9:58 PM

SGT Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 25 May 2015 21:58:27 -0400

No it doesn't, although I'll admit to pausing just a bit when it was said twice to me this weekend.

The first encounter came from a coworker, a wonderful person who every Veteran's Day goes out of her way to thank each vet she knows. This weekend, she sent pics of all the flags my company had placed around our world HQ (which was fantastic) and said this was for me ... it took me a bit as to how to respond and I ended up thanking her and asking for a few moments for those who've died in the service of this country.

The 2nd was a college friend of my daughter's who surprised me with a loud "Happy Memorial Day"!. I simply thanked her too.

In the end, I'm happy that most of the people I interact with are at least aware that this isn't just another day off and seem to have some understanding of its significance, if not the specific reason behind it.

Response by SPC Jason Bills made May 25 at 2015 10:08 PM

SPC Jason Bills — Mon, 25 May 2015 22:08:37 -0400

Yes yes it does. Especially considering it reminds of my fallen friends there is nothing hapy about this day.. I do feel however that it is not the average citizens fault for thinking this. This day unfortunately like all the others has fallen victim to marketing and media

Response by SFC Ron Chelsy made May 25 at 2015 10:54 PM

SFC Ron Chelsy — Mon, 25 May 2015 22:54:08 -0400

I have to say it bothers me because civilians do not know what it really means, other than BBQ, drinking and partying. Unless it gets personal to them they will not change their thought process which is why I politely smile to them and thank them and swallow my resentment till I am alone and able share with those who really understand. I know what this day is for as my brothers and sisters who have served and that is where I get ok with it.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made May 25 at 2015 11:30 PM

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 25 May 2015 23:30:29 -0400

I just tell them it's not Veterans day, on Memorial day they should be thankful for those who gave their lives that we might live free.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made May 26 at 2015 1:07 AM

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 26 May 2015 01:07:56 -0400

Yes, when first heard it does bother me. But at the same time, I know the intent behind their words is pure. My typical response when I hear, or am told "Happy Memorial Day" is as follows; "It's a day of remembrance for the fallen, not for me. But I do thank you"

Response by PO1 Rick Serviss made May 26 at 2015 4:39 AM

PO1 Rick Serviss — Tue, 26 May 2015 04:39:17 -0400

It doesn't bother me at all. I always return it with thank you, Happy Memorial Day. I think most citizens appreciate the military and this is a way of showing it. Friday a guy at work thanked me for my service and said he never served but his brothers are in the Army. I didn't get mad and I don't think a nice gesture is a reason to be rude. Vietnam gave us a look at the alternative with the negative attitude towards war.

Response by SCPO David Lockwood made May 26 at 2015 5:57 AM

SCPO David Lockwood — Tue, 26 May 2015 05:57:50 -0400

The one thing that bother's me the most is when people approach me and thank me for my service. Now I'm not opposed to them thanking me but Memorial Day, I believe, is not for thanking service living servicemembers and veterans. It's a time to remember the sacrifices that so many made to keep this country safe and who are no longer with us. God bless them for their sacrifices and for keeping us safe.

Response by SGT Bryon Sergent made May 26 at 2015 11:15 AM

SGT Bryon Sergent — Tue, 26 May 2015 11:15:30 -0400

Well I was raised in a military family. My grandfather, and uncle was in the Navy, Aunt in the WAC, Step-father was Army, Father Army and Grand fathers in the Army. We cover far back as I can tell WWI. Minus the time between Grenada, Panama, Somalia and Bosnia. I have always Respected and Revered the fallen. Planted Flags on the Grave sites of the fallen. I have always heard Happy. I was taught that you never forget, and remembered them earnestly. They always had happy thoughts of my uncle and Great Grandfathers. Yes they cried and remembered the but reveled that they were part of there lives.
So if by remembrance of our friends we set and fix there favorite food and drink there favorite beer, laugh of the stupid shit that we did, the trouble we got into and the times that we shared. I choose it to be a Happy occasion. They would want it that way and would have hopefully done the same for me. Yes it is sad and I miss them terribly. My grand father would have stuck a boot in my ass for me sitting around blubbering.
I get it, it is not Veterans Day. I get that it is a day of remembrance, and there are a lot of people who don't care and are Ignorant to the fact. I have seen a lot BITCH about it. SO what is the correct thing to say. "dude sorry for your loss, hope your day sucks"? No and I don't want that either.
So what is the correct response. How do you say anything about memorial day? Everyone says don't tell me happy but don't give a good or correct way to address you. How would you like to be address on this day?
Please be nice and tell me cause I don't know either?

Response by SA Harold Hansmann made May 26 at 2015 12:40 PM

SA Harold Hansmann — Tue, 26 May 2015 12:40:31 -0400

I just stay away from people on Memorial Day. This year I spent it in the woods.

Response by SSG David Shifflett made May 26 at 2015 1:04 PM

SSG David Shifflett — Tue, 26 May 2015 13:04:30 -0400

I hate the greeting. I guess civilians do not understand and politicians use it to walk on our backs. I have lost friends and comrades in the service of this nation. This is their day! I never go any where and sit at home. I pull out the scrap book and remember the fun times and what we did as a team. Other than that, I turn off the phone, email and sit and pray for the ones that never came home. Memorial day is a day of remembrance, to be humble, and to think of our comrades who never came home.

Response by Sgt Private RallyPoint Member made May 26 at 2015 1:53 PM

Sgt Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 26 May 2015 13:53:36 -0400

OMGosh yes. Most don't know the meaning of Memorial Day and they get it confused with Veteran's Day. But for sure the main purpose is not for BBQ's.

Response by PVT Nathan Coyle made May 27 at 2015 5:48 PM

PVT Nathan Coyle — Wed, 27 May 2015 17:48:51 -0400

memorial day to me is not merely a time to mourn the soldiers who fell in the line of duty, but a day set aside to thank them for their sacrifice. As the saying goes " all give some, but some gave all". it's not just about the loss of a good soldier, but to give recognition. so to show citizens that it's not just a job, it is the greatest job, With the greatest risk and to raise their pride in our fair country so more will join the armed forces

Response by PVT Nathan Coyle made May 29 at 2015 1:53 PM

PVT Nathan Coyle — Fri, 29 May 2015 13:53:06 -0400

I think that most people don't mean to offend, but even those who do Know the truth of Memorial Day don't usually no what to do so they thank those of us who are still alive instead of the dead cause they don't know how to thank the dead.

Response by Sgt Patrick Carron made May 5 at 2016 11:39 AM

Sgt Patrick Carron — Thu, 05 May 2016 11:39:21 -0400

Old question, but with Memorial day soon upon us, I felt obliged to respond. I don't feel bothered when people say Happy Memorial Day;however, I get bothered by all of the sales that the stores feel that they have to put on during Memorial weekend and Veterans weekend. I turn on the radio and a majority of what I hear is, "Memorial Day Sale" or come get it for our "Veterans Day Sale." Is this what my brothers and I sacrificed for and why I lost my fellow Marines in battle just so people can save a few bucks and forget about the true reason as to why we remember these days? It isn't about the BBQ's and sales, it is about those who have put their own life on the line for the greater good. I don't know, maybe I am making something out of nothing. If anyone reads this, I welcome any insight. And if no one reads it, then at least I got to put my thoughts out there.

Response by TSgt Joe C. made May 24 at 2016 12:07 PM

TSgt Joe C. — Tue, 24 May 2016 12:07:43 -0400

It does irk me and you are not uptight at all. I've corrected people before that don't understand what the real meaning of Memorial Day is.

Response by PO2 Jonathan Scharff made Jun 22 at 2017 8:41 PM

PO2 Jonathan Scharff — Thu, 22 Jun 2017 20:41:48 -0400

I don't know if this will help anyone but I have always remembered the fallen and had a more solemn morning as the flag is at half staff and then celebrated them the rest of the day after I go to full staff. Gives me both mental spaces in the same day. Just what I do to deal with the losses of family and friends.

Response by SPC Albert Kallock made May 29 at 2021 9:06 AM

SPC Albert Kallock — Sat, 29 May 2021 09:06:53 -0400

I don’t have a problem having it said to me…or saying to another Vet. Why? From civilians, I feel they are acknowledging our service…in a positive way. For Vet to Vet it means we made it through a sometimes difficult time…..that this particular day defines those who went before us…that we are acknowledging their sacrifice with gratitude. My father and uncle are interred at Arlington. My wife is at the National Cemetery at Cape Cod (Bourne)….waiting for me. Happy Memorial Day.

Response by SPC Sarah Hamby made May 29 at 2021 9:21 AM

SPC Sarah Hamby — Sat, 29 May 2021 09:21:33 -0400

What's happy about it? I usually respond to happy dead soldiers day to you too.

Response by SFC Michael Hasbun made May 29 at 2021 9:44 AM

SFC Michael Hasbun — Sat, 29 May 2021 09:44:39 -0400

Memorial day is an opportunity to celebrate the life of someone who passed in service. You're not obligated to be a depressed Debbie Downer. The celebration of someone's life should be a happy occasion, stop peeing on people's happiness.

Response by SFC Cynthia Eyer made May 29 at 2021 11:31 AM

SFC Cynthia Eyer — Sat, 29 May 2021 11:31:37 -0400

I respond with “And a Blessed Memorial Day to You.” Then I ask them if they have someone who served they are memoralizing. Then I add that this is a sad, yet joyful time as we remember those we love who have ascended, some before their time we wanted them to ascend. People don’t mean anything facetious by it, they just are ignorant (means they have not and maybe never will) of our experiences and our sorrow. My son was Navy and ascended at the age of 23 years. He would have been 41 this year had his time to go on to his next Spiritual mission not come.
Offer others clarity and wisdom in their expression to you. Most see this as just another holiday. One can never know, this deep gnosis we all hold within our very being, until they experience it themselves. I pray they never do.
Blessings in the Light from those who have gone to the Light before us ❤️✨❤️

Response by SPC William Crabbe made May 29 at 2021 12:05 PM

SPC William Crabbe — Sat, 29 May 2021 12:05:22 -0400

The position that all American Citizens should not be "Faulted" for their lack of empathy for the Fallen that paid the ultimate price for Freedom is absurd per Captain Kletzing. You're either a Self absorbed nihilist or a brain washed enemy of the constant on going War against a Free Society. Every day "We the People" are confronted with the enemy from within and outside the country. There is an abundance of Psycho Babble buzz words & group think floating around the verse to upset the pedestal some of us place the idea of Freedom upon. Nevertheless that is what we fought for & some paid the ultimate price! Anyone of us that were actually in Combat could have been in the wrong place at the wrong time... We should have no guilt being survivors. However we owe our brothers the steadfast maintenance of our belief in being a Free Society... A Lawless society is a broken society & not Free. Never allow our fallen brothers sacrifice be in vain! Remember the Mission goal of FREEDOM for a FREE People and the sacrifice. Insist other citizens that benefit from that sacrifice do the same because they need faithful leadership always.

Response by MSgt Mark Risner made May 29 at 2021 6:12 PM

MSgt Mark Risner — Sat, 29 May 2021 18:12:02 -0400

MSgt M. Risner USAF Ret
When I hear these words on Memorial Day, I usually says thanks and go on. Trying to explain something like the true meaning of the day to the general public every time is pretty much wasted. Unfortunately, most people will understand what you're saying, but they will never look at it the same way those who served do. Why should we expect them to? In a perfect world, but I am just thankful that there are quite a few people out there that care enough to thank us in any way. I went 16 or so yrs. in the AF before I ever heard, "Thank you for your service." So any recognition for all of us veterans is a good thing. I never thought about it or asked for it, but it was nice to hear it when it started happening. Do I take advantage of military discounts, etc.? I sure do and I don't feel guilty about it. We should embrace all of what the public recognition has to offer. It may end as quickly as it started. Who knows? What I do know is that accepting recognition (the more sincere the better) is always a good thing. We (vets) all know what the real meaning is regardless.

Response by PVT John Ragan made May 29 at 2021 7:30 PM

PVT John Ragan — Sat, 29 May 2021 19:30:14 -0400

No it doesn't make me feel bad for someone to say, "Happy Memorial Day", because I got to see another one and another chance to think about those that did not.

Response by SGT Bruce Cutler made May 30 at 2021 1:21 AM

SGT Bruce Cutler — Sun, 30 May 2021 01:21:15 -0400

Speaking for myself, this is an unfathomable concept. This is about the ultimate oxymoron. When non-military people say it to me, I tell them that there is no such thing as a "Happy Memorial Day". I am an 11Bravo, that went through and somehow survived TET, in southern I Corp. I just figure these are civilians or Troops that never got to far outside of the 'wire'. After eleven and one half months in the 'bush', all of the blood, gorp, swollen, dismembered, maggot infested corpses left me with lasting feelings about this matter. I will not type about the details of our KIAs. In closing for me there is no such thing. When offered this wish, I simply respond that I will have the best Memorial Day that I can. My response could continue for several more pages, buy you get the idea of where my mine is.

Response by Capt Cindy Hoge made May 30 at 2021 9:42 AM

Capt Cindy Hoge — Sun, 30 May 2021 09:42:47 -0400

Not at all. I believe that most people who say this have good intentions. Whether or not they understand the difference between Memorial Day and Veterans, I think they just may not know what to say, but they want to acknowledge the day. I just say "thank you."

Response by 1LT James Pavlovsky made May 31 at 2021 6:11 AM

1LT James Pavlovsky — Mon, 31 May 2021 06:11:50 -0400

It doesn't offend me. I believe that we could coin another representative greeting for the mournful day. But, my friends only mean well. The most frequent greeting that I get now days is, "thanks for your service". I like that better myself.

Response by COL John Topper made May 31 at 2021 6:22 AM

COL John Topper — Mon, 31 May 2021 06:22:25 -0400

Not so much. I know it comes from well-intentioned people who don’t understand or have not been taught better. I may say something if it’s an appropriate time and if I know the person well. It’s difficult for those who haven’t placed a buddy in a body bag to understand that we who have look on this as a day to remember and reflect. No reason to get upset with them. Simply thank them and move on.

Response by SGT Lance LeBerte made May 31 at 2021 6:36 AM

SGT Lance LeBerte — Mon, 31 May 2021 06:36:48 -0400

I feel the same way, but a local radio personality, a Vietnam Vet, has been telling his audience for years, do not wish anyone a happy Memorial Day, and it has happened less and less, at least around here

Response by SFC Kenneth G. made May 31 at 2021 7:01 AM

SFC Kenneth G. — Mon, 31 May 2021 07:01:57 -0400

It used to bother me to hear it said. I now ask them to say to have a safe Memorial Day and be happy that these Americans that gave the ultimate sacrifice allowed you to enjoy life and celebrate the American way. When they come to me and thank me for my service on Memorial Day I am honored but I explain that it is not my day it is for those that are departed and gave all to serve this nation. I tell them any other day is mine especially Veteran's Day. A little education to those who don't know because of the history that was taken from them in school.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made May 31 at 2021 7:09 AM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 31 May 2021 07:09:36 -0400

It is not a day of happiness. It is a day of reflection and a day to remember the tremendous loss of losing loved ones who served our country during a conflict. It is a day to remember the families of loved ones killed in action. Nothing happy about this day at all.

Response by PO2 Robert Broussard made May 31 at 2021 7:22 AM

PO2 Robert Broussard — Mon, 31 May 2021 07:22:50 -0400

I have 13 family members that have served including me and 1 brother still serving. It's easy remembering my heroes but what is hardest to watch and the new generation dye their hair knee on the American flag take up socialism. Cold Era vet and Dersert storm my mom and dad served in and during the Vietnam War and Korean War Era. My grandfather WW1 my God father survived Omaha Beach. A great uncle that served in WW2 served 25 missions as a tail gunner. And many patriotic hero with no capes just doing their job to keep old glory flying! God bless

Response by Maj John Bell made May 31 at 2021 8:01 AM

Maj John Bell — Mon, 31 May 2021 08:01:07 -0400

You are too uptight. A week from today, if someone says "Happy Monday," will you get frustrated (Hate it). You are taking offense where none was intended. And further you are taking offense where someone wished you well. That is just plain wrong.

Every year these "Happy Memorial Day" guilt posts come up. Personally I can't think of a better legacy for our war dead than Americans making an effort to have a good day that involves fellowship with family, friends and community. And if the war dead look down I hope that every laugh, every smile and every scene makes them smile and makes them say "I paid for that that and it was worth the price." No sack cloth and ashes for me and mine.

Response by SCPO David Longmuir made May 31 at 2021 8:19 AM

SCPO David Longmuir — Mon, 31 May 2021 08:19:52 -0400

It does bother me because the people who say it have never been taught what the true meaning of Memorial Day is, and that is sad.

Response by CSM Bruce Trego made May 31 at 2021 8:24 AM

CSM Bruce Trego — Mon, 31 May 2021 08:24:13 -0400

For me it's not a happy holiday. It's a day for remembering heros that have fallen and their families. I've known some but there are milllions I don't. They are all heros. They all deserve to be remembered on this day. And their families need to know that they are remembered and that they haven't died in vain. Today is a day of thinking about others, not just ourselves and having a fun day.

Response by LTC Private RallyPoint Member made May 31 at 2021 8:26 AM

LTC Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 31 May 2021 08:26:42 -0400

Response by 1SG James Kelly made May 31 at 2021 8:35 AM

1SG James Kelly — Mon, 31 May 2021 08:35:27 -0400

No, can't fix stupid.

Response by MSG James Reynolds made May 31 at 2021 8:37 AM

MSG James Reynolds — Mon, 31 May 2021 08:37:45 -0400

I admire your dedication to the, Nation. I believe you answered your own question, "am I to uptight?" If you think you need a haircut, do you need one? Have a peaceful and meaningful Memorial day sir.

Response by SFC David Wojta made May 31 at 2021 8:40 AM

SFC David Wojta — Mon, 31 May 2021 08:40:17 -0400

No, it doesn't bother me. What bothers me is telling people what to say or think. There seems to be a lot of that going around lately. My personal efforts are better spent by educating the youth of America as to the true meaning. I am involved with a Young Marines unit and we participate in Memorial Day honors every year. I also encourage people to lead by example and others see what it is all about and that is what sticks. Trying to "control" other folks thoughts and speech just goes against my grain.

Response by SMSgt Irving Torchinsky made May 31 at 2021 8:53 AM

SMSgt Irving Torchinsky — Mon, 31 May 2021 08:53:19 -0400

Nothing happy about toay, just remember our brothers who are no longer here

Response by SP5 Kenneth Smith made May 31 at 2021 9:07 AM

SP5 Kenneth Smith — Mon, 31 May 2021 09:07:39 -0400

Even before seeing this question posted, I was thinking about how to acknowledge today without saying "happy". Then I received an e-mail from a friend that said "Thinking of you on this Memorial Day". I wrote back thanking my friend for the thoughts. Today is not so much a happy day when we think of those we have lost; however, it is a day that we can lay down our work and enjoy the companionship of friends and family--to burn a couple of hot dogs and burgers on the grill and remember those who are not here today and honor their sacrifices.

Response by CW3 Joseph Lawrence made May 31 at 2021 9:09 AM

CW3 Joseph Lawrence — Mon, 31 May 2021 09:09:13 -0400

Frankly, I am more than upset at the Vice President's remark about having a nice long weekend. Way too many of our politicians have no idea the sacrifice that these men and women made to keep this country free and safe. I have to agree with a lot of my fellow soldiers that one of the requirements to be able to serve in our congress is that you must be a former member of our military.

Response by SSgt Patrick Scherer made May 31 at 2021 9:11 AM

SSgt Patrick Scherer — Mon, 31 May 2021 09:11:32 -0400

When some one says happy memorial day and thank you for your service....I tell them I appreciate it but if you truly wish to thank someone, please go to The Bushnell National Cemetery and thank those who this holiday is for.

Response by SMSgt George Cutler made May 31 at 2021 9:11 AM

SMSgt George Cutler — Mon, 31 May 2021 09:11:55 -0400

Folks mean well. They just don’t understand as a smaller percentage of Americans have or will serve in the military.

Response by MAJ Private RallyPoint Member made May 31 at 2021 9:17 AM

MAJ Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 31 May 2021 09:17:40 -0400

I realize you posted this six years ago, but came on here today to ask the same question. I can’t think of another way to say it. Yes, Memorial Day is about those who gave the ultimate sacrifice. It’s also about our duty to honor them and celebrate their lives, and the lives of our brothers and sisters in arms that paid the ultimate sacrifice. In celebrating their lives, maybe we have a BBQ or get together with friends and family. People should have a good time and should have a “happy Memorial Day.” Perhaps we should look at it like “have a happy Memorial Day” as apposed to “happy Memorial Day.” It’s important to pay tribute and remember the reason behind the holiday though.

Response by SCPO Daniel McKinnon made May 31 at 2021 9:18 AM

SCPO Daniel McKinnon — Mon, 31 May 2021 09:18:12 -0400

I don’t let it bother me and it doesn’t really happen that often. US Military exposure is quite a bit smaller in our population and one usually just hears or reads a small news clip at some distant country our military may be at or the general negative news the media spews. During WWII a majority of civilians back home sacrificed and many lost family members and was a part of most people’s life. Today is not the case and military traditions and holiday meanings are not common knowledge, as this isn’t taught in schools or passed down from former military family members that have now passed away from old age. Times have changed and with a smaller population exposed to the military and it’s activities, less and less folks will know. Our American culture has changed significantly and is a totally different life from when I grew up in the late 1950s and 60s, which I think is a good thing. I grew up watching the Vietnam War on the Nightly News, but had no knowledge about meaning of Memorial Day or Veteran’s Day until I joined in the 1970s and learned over the years. I saw the protests and how Vietnam Vets were treated when they came home. Many of us have had horrific experiences that we don’t want to talk about with our spouses, kids, and grandkids especially those who served in the past two decades in the Middle East or 50 years ago in Vietnam. Sometimes it is left better unsaid and move on and try enjoy the rest of our short time here on earth and not worry about minor things. I don’t want to be the angry veteran correcting people I meet or friends and family. There are many things that others are experts in that I am not aware of and I wouldn’t want to be corrected all the time if I said the wrong words. Many of us joined so our children wouldn’t have to experience the horrors of war, and the boredom of some duties to make our world a better place, and for the most part we have been somewhat successful. Some of our children did have to go to Iraq and Afghanistan though some did and paid the ultimate sacrifice. My only hope is that our politicians stop being so quick to send our military into harms way only as a last resort and not for stupid political reasons. For the large majority of our children or grandchildren we have been successful with our service, so they did not have to experience the horrors of war, so if a few do happen to say “Happy Memorial Day” I just smile and go about my day.

Response by MSgt George Maynard made May 31 at 2021 9:52 AM

MSgt George Maynard — Mon, 31 May 2021 09:52:29 -0400

There was nothing happy about this.

Response by SFC Harry Jacobs made May 31 at 2021 10:27 AM

SFC Harry Jacobs — Mon, 31 May 2021 10:27:48 -0400

No, The individual means well but may not have the same exposure to the Military as we have.

Response by PO3 Paula Fialkoff made May 31 at 2021 10:42 AM

PO3 Paula Fialkoff — Mon, 31 May 2021 10:42:32 -0400

Not really. Non veterans just don't understand. That's why we have this platform.

Response by Nancy Menagh made May 31 at 2021 10:43 AM

Nancy Menagh — Mon, 31 May 2021 10:43:02 -0400

As long as PBS has the Memorial Day Concert and the Veterans Day Concert and makes them both the SAME format, we will never be able to educate the American people about the difference. And since we say Happy Veterans Day, then why would people not say Happy Memorial Day - they look the same to most people.
PBS could do so much to educate by separating the two and stop showcasing and thanking Veterans on Memorial Day. I keep hoping Gary Sinise might wake up and help change the format, but it never happens. This year even the USO has used Memorial Day for a campaign to "Thank a Veteran"...EVEN the USO cannot get it right....Et tu Brute....

Response by Cpl Bill Weiler made May 31 at 2021 10:53 AM

Cpl Bill Weiler — Mon, 31 May 2021 10:53:05 -0400

Hearing "Happy Memorial Day" is like hearing...
"Sorry to hear your baby died. Do you want your cigar back "?

Response by CPL LaForest Gray made May 31 at 2021 11:04 AM

CPL LaForest Gray — Mon, 31 May 2021 11:04:21 -0400

I find it odd to hear … I’ve been dealing w/ loss/death since I was 8 yrs. old and I know it’s a social norm to put “Happy” in front of days for remembrance/celebratory days … yet for me, it’s off putting.

I understand why people say it, I don’t say it. Yet, when a stranger says it to me as a veteran, I just say “thank you”.

#respect #remembrance #allthatserved

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made May 31 at 2021 11:13 AM

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 31 May 2021 11:13:45 -0400

It tells me that the person doesn't understand the history of the Day. It bothers me that there is a lack of education, and people are trying to be good, but miss the mark. What bothers my more is the mass of commercial advertising based on a holiday without a thought about the loss of life being acknowledged.

Response by SSG Bobby Cagle made May 31 at 2021 11:22 AM

SSG Bobby Cagle — Mon, 31 May 2021 11:22:33 -0400

Yeah, it bothers me, but people don't know what else to say. They're happy to have a 3-day weekend to buy a mattress, float the river, and BBQ. In my youth, Decoration Day (May 28) was an occasion to visit the graves of those fathers, sons, and brothers who died in the war.

Response by COL Private RallyPoint Member made May 31 at 2021 11:40 AM

COL Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 31 May 2021 11:40:47 -0400

Many of the True heros never came home! We all have wondered at one time or another, why them and not me?

Response by COL Private RallyPoint Member made May 31 at 2021 11:50 AM

COL Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 31 May 2021 11:50:59 -0400

l truly feel we are obligated to insure that they are not forgotten, our charge whenever speaking in public or one on one is to tell there story. Many are forgotten except for sons, daughters, husbands wives and sisters and brothers. I think of the wives and families on Memorial Day, they probably suffered and continue to suffer most from the unknown. God bless and keep you all. Be encouraged.

Response by SP5 Joe Haggerty made May 31 at 2021 11:55 AM

SP5 Joe Haggerty — Mon, 31 May 2021 11:55:10 -0400

I am to old to care what others say or think and everyone has a right in America to say anything (but don’t tell unAmericans ) Just thank all for what they did for all.

Response by SFC Greg Bruorton made May 31 at 2021 12:34 PM

SFC Greg Bruorton — Mon, 31 May 2021 12:34:51 -0400

I truly mourn our comrades who paid the ultimate price for our freedoms. From that, the word "happy" is unfeeling and inappropriate. Our generation lost many troops since Korea and I feel the day should be filled with prayers rather than boisterous gatherings.

When I look at my rack I quickly get into the memorialzation of those having earned the awards and much more. Losing a Veteran relative gives meaning in the holiday.

Response by SMSgt Alan Saunders made May 31 at 2021 12:42 PM

SMSgt Alan Saunders — Mon, 31 May 2021 12:42:45 -0400

When people say to me "Happy Memorial Day," I think to myself that they really don't understand the purpose of this day. It was originally called "Decoration Day" because we placed flags on the graves of servicemen (and women) who died in the Civil War. After WWI, it was changed to honor all who died in conflicts reaching back to the Revolutionary War. And again, in 1950, the name was changed to Memorial Day to capture the true essence of the day - remembering and memorializing men and women who died to establish (and then defend) our freedoms.

Response by Lt Col Jim Bemis made May 31 at 2021 1:20 PM

Lt Col Jim Bemis — Mon, 31 May 2021 13:20:40 -0400

What bothers me (mildly) is the wrong use of the euphemistic terms used for describing those lost in war, and especially in combat. Yes, "they gave all" is okay. So is "they gave the last full measure of devotion." BUT, since the time of Lincoln, the correct phrase is "supreme sacrifice," and "ultimate" is only used when saying "they paid the ultimate price." So, yes, that bugs me a bit when people get it wrong.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made May 31 at 2021 1:36 PM

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 31 May 2021 13:36:31 -0400

I don't get wrapped around the axe handle on this one. I kind of understand that most civilians don't really know any better. When it gets to the point that I see too much focus on the wrong thing, I politely speak up and say, " I really appreciate what you are trying to say or do, but hey, let's remember what this day really represents. It's for those who are no longer with us, they paid the full price so that you would remain free."
There are those people in our society that honestly believe that this is just a Federally Mandated Picnic Day and nothing more. They don't even have enough class to get it even partially wrong! I am highly disturbed at the amount of ignorance AND APATHY displayed in our country when it relates to this hallowed day. It would not surprise me in the least if some of these same people would have the audacity to try to find something sinister or illegal in everything we do.
Signed,
A warrior whose heart is fixed on America

Response by SSG Wayne Wood made May 31 at 2021 1:53 PM

SSG Wayne Wood — Mon, 31 May 2021 13:53:32 -0400

There are much more important things to get uptight about. Growing up an Army brat with a dad and brother in Vietnam and serving in the Vietnam Era (though I didn't go, too young) I remember being called a "Baby Killer." So, it's an improvement and I try to look at the sentiments. as SFC Mark Merino has said, what else is one supposed to say?

I remember going with my grandparents to the Memorial Day ceremonies where my grandmother would be honored as a "Gold Star Mother. Then we would cross the River to Jefferson Barracks Cemetery outside St Louis and lay a wreath on my uncle's grave before going to eat in silence; my grandparents with tears in their eyes as they remembered the little boy they raised to be sent to a foreign land to be killed before he ever had a chance to live.

I remember the guys I knew who came over for Sunday dinner at our house who went to Nam and didn't come back; there were guys I served with who were killed both in combat and line of duty (the six troopers killed in Gallant Eagle 82 - I jumped right behind two of them and worked with a third). The "Gallant Eagle Six" didn't die in combat, but they and others who died training for war are just as dead as those I knew who were killed in combat. Their faces come to me. I am grateful the civilians who wish me a "Happy Memorial Day" may not have faces that visit them in the night or in quiet moments. Maybe, as I think about it, when they wish me a "Happy Memorial Day" or thank me for my service - they are really thanking them.

But "they" are not here. I'm honored and humbled to stand in for them.

I was declared dead at least three times (or so I'm told; I remember hearing medics declare me dead once) on March 30, 1982 - Gallant Eagle 82. We fooled them all by my coming back and serving another five years. I wonder half-jokingly if this day is for me, too even though I didn't "stay dead."

I hear all the complaining about folks partying on this day. But, if I had stayed dead I'd like to think that I wouldn't want folks to spend the whole day in mourning for me. I would rather folks think of me, tell a funny story about me, and enjoy the day off the blood of our fallen paid for.

Response by SPC John Veenstra made May 31 at 2021 2:13 PM

SPC John Veenstra — Mon, 31 May 2021 14:13:31 -0400

When I first started distributing Buddy Poppies we did it on Veterans Day and Memorial Day. On Veterans Day we said Happy Veterans day! My first Memorial day distributing poppies I did not know what to say. I knew "Happy" was just wrong. The veteran working with me said just say "Have a good Memorial Day". So that is what we did. I am comfortable with that. I have been part of the Poppy distributing program for 8 years and I am often overcome by the reactions and donations. Especially the young children who will scrap up whatever change they own from all their pockets and put it in the box. In 1954 I remember how proud I was when my grandmother asked me if I wanted to give my quarter to the Veteran for my poppy. Every time I see one of these children it brings back that memory, and sometimes a tear.

Response by MSG Ralph Cook made May 31 at 2021 2:50 PM

MSG Ralph Cook — Mon, 31 May 2021 14:50:20 -0400

It doesn't really bother me, but it is not supposed to be a happy day. Veterans day is the happy day, because we came home.

Response by SPC William Szkromiuk made May 31 at 2021 3:26 PM

SPC William Szkromiuk — Mon, 31 May 2021 15:26:01 -0400

We had a Memorial Day Parade in my town this past saturday. I was in it, driving my truck and pulling a float/trailer. This was my first time in the Parade. I have previously been a spectator to every year's Parade since moving here. It is a very nice affair for the size of the community.

The crowd lining the streets on both sides were constantly clapping and saying "Thank You". They only meant to honor the Veterans. It is impossible to take umbrage to well intentioned sentiment. I would correct everyone of them if I could without hurting their feelings, but that is impossible.

I know why I am there and all my fellow Veterans know. That is good enough for me.
God Bless all that "gave that last full measure of devotion".

Response by SGM Bill Frazer made May 31 at 2021 4:41 PM

SGM Bill Frazer — Mon, 31 May 2021 16:41:13 -0400

Concur Sir, see damn little to be Happy about. Lost a bunch or good people, missing spots at their families tables/lives. A day I spend remembering, musing and often crying. Not a Damn Day to buy something on sale for sure.

Response by 1LT Peter Duston made May 31 at 2021 6:29 PM

1LT Peter Duston — Mon, 31 May 2021 18:29:49 -0400

Yes! It's not "Happy", all those lives lost is serious business!

Response by PO2 Christopher Thompson made May 31 at 2021 8:23 PM

PO2 Christopher Thompson — Mon, 31 May 2021 20:23:59 -0400

No, I do not get upset, that is counter productive, my sister (who never served ) posted that it was her pet peeve that people say "Happy Memorial Day" my reply to her was this: Someone somewhere decided that he or she wanted their family to have the opportunity to live free to love, and to pass on to the next generation the ability to love. They did so knowing full well that might cost them literally everything, but did it anyway for love. That is the reason we celebrate, solemn joy that someone in our past cared enough to want me to be free.

Response by SGT Ken Houston made May 31 at 2021 8:25 PM

SGT Ken Houston — Mon, 31 May 2021 20:25:28 -0400

It used to until I really thought about it and looked at it from the perspective of being the one memorialized. If I had been one of those who died I would much rather the memory be celebrated with BBQ and beer (or whatever you choose to do). I know I would much rather be celebrated in happiness than sorrow. I like to think those we memorialize today would feel the same way. That doesn't mean we shouldn't take a few moments to think of and remember those who's sacrifice gave us the great gift of freedom we enjoy today.

Response by LT Stewart Herrick made May 31 at 2021 9:32 PM

LT Stewart Herrick — Mon, 31 May 2021 21:32:10 -0400

Yes, it does bother me. It is a somber day, not a happy one to me.

Response by SPC Nadine Olney made May 31 at 2021 9:36 PM

SPC Nadine Olney — Mon, 31 May 2021 21:36:55 -0400

Yes it bothers me! Memorial day is to honor those who have DIED in service to their county.

Response by A1C Isa Kocher made May 31 at 2021 10:28 PM

A1C Isa Kocher — Mon, 31 May 2021 22:28:21 -0400

i'm not a combat veteran, but i volunteered during the cuba crisisa, thought it was important to die fighting for my country if it came to that, and thank god and mr krushchev and kennedy that sanity won out. just a weather tech but serving my country.

Happy Memorial Day is a good way to say how much we thank and feel gratitude for the heroes to whom we owe this holiday. that government of the people by the people for the people [SCOTUS 1819 McCulloch v Maryland] should not perish so many gave in so many ways, mothers in cargo planes, people forced to serve in galleys instead of combat, people who sacrificed everything to fight against bad wars to enrich the greedy, doctors, lawyers, clerks, navajo code talkers, ... we remember them all, farmers growing the food, ladies clubs collecting used pots and pans, kid's victory gardens, Emmet Tills sacrificed against their wills in all innocence. we owe them all. so it's thanksgiving day. a day to share and give and be grateful. seriously

Response by GySgt Kenneth Pepper made Jun 1 at 2021 10:54 AM

GySgt Kenneth Pepper — Tue, 01 Jun 2021 10:54:09 -0400

Like many, I do not take offense because I know that most Americans simply do not know the difference. Being offended, and especially dressing someone down, does not help the situation.
There are so many more of them than there are of us. If each of us takes the time to explain the difference between Veteran's Day and Memorial Day to a dozen people, we may move the needle.
Most importantly, we need to teach the younger generation to mourn the loss of the fallen, but also to celebrate the sacrifices given to secure our freedom.
Most of us have kids, grandkids, etc.,that we can influence. Be the role model you wish every veteran would be. If you don't show them what veteran pride is, the education system and the media will wash away any sort of civic pride that they may have.

Response by LTJG Sandra Smith made Jun 1 at 2021 11:02 AM

LTJG Sandra Smith — Tue, 01 Jun 2021 11:02:50 -0400

Yes, because it says to me the person, like Kamal Harris just sees a 3 day weekend, & has no understanding of WHY such an holiday exists. Usually it's in passing & not a good place to educate, unfortunately.

Response by SP5 Michael Cates made Jun 1 at 2021 4:58 PM

SP5 Michael Cates — Tue, 01 Jun 2021 16:58:04 -0400

Life is to short to worry about some ones thoughts on Veterans Days! Schools over the last 50yr's have taught less and less about HOW LUCKY THEY ARE TO LIVE IN A COUNTRY THAT PEOPLE ALL OVER THE WORLD RUN TO and WHY? GOOGLE "HOW THE HONG KONG PEOPLE CARRIED THE AMERICAN FLAG IN ALL OF THEIR PROTESTS! THEY NEW THE AMERICAN FLAG STOOD AND STILL STANDS FOR FREEDOM AND DEMOCRACY! "ALL THAT THEY EVER WANTED" !!! PLEASE THOSE PROTESTS WERE PEACEFUL! NOTHING LIKE THE BLM PROTESTS NOW BURNING AND LOOTING! ?

Response by PO2 Bull Halsey made Jun 2 at 2021 4:19 PM

PO2 Bull Halsey — Wed, 02 Jun 2021 16:19:45 -0400

Yes, it does. I don’t mind, maybe, Have a good weekend or Holiday, but, when people say the former, i ask them if they know what the purpose of Memorial day is. Many don’t have a clue, because they often don’t teach these things in schools anymore.
Oddly enough, when I put out my flag in the morning, I saw no others, none, on my street. Later I drove down to the ceremony at the Veteran’s Park and saw maybe a dozen more in about two miles of city driving.
Irked, I wrote a little comment asking why would people not post the flag today. I got zero answers from non-posters and many from those who have a pole and fly it daily.
As I am on a Veteran’s commission for the local government, I will be bringing this up in public next meeting. Wish me luck, as I hope to get this in the local newspaper for commentary.
One would not see this in the Midwest where I grew up. Everyone had lost someone in a war. Not so in California. They have little appreciation of their entitlements here. Very selfish people in this burg.

Response by Amn TeiJae Taylor made Jun 3 at 2021 1:26 AM

Amn TeiJae Taylor — Thu, 03 Jun 2021 01:26:13 -0400

It doesn't bother me since I know that people wish holidays because it's customary for them. They usually don't even think about what they are saying or whether it makes sense or not. You know, like when they say, "how are you" as a greeting and not a question, not really wanting to hear how you really are. It's one of the very few holidays that I recognize as a special day, so I take it as if they want me to be happy on that day for the ones I've had the honor to meet, and not sad for the ones I've lost.

Response by TSgt Ken Vandevoort made Aug 1 at 2021 9:23 PM

TSgt Ken Vandevoort — Sun, 01 Aug 2021 21:23:36 -0400

I always felt that Memorial Day was hijacked by the florist industry so they could sell more flowers and it lost its true meaning. It was watered down even more when it went from the actual date to a Monday every year. I remember when stores would close on Memorial Day.
I try to visit the Keokuk National Cemetery every Memorial Day weekend and pay my respect with a penny and a salute to an orphan from our town who died in the South Pacific during WWII. I walk among the graves because someday I will be buried next to them and I get a feeling there that I don't get elsewhere.