Does the loss of a brother in arms affect you more as you get older?

SSgt Jim Gilmore — Wed, 07 Sep 2016 21:46:03 -0400

Response by CSM Bill Roy made Sep 7 at 2016 9:47 PM

CSM Bill Roy — Wed, 07 Sep 2016 21:47:10 -0400

It certainly has with me. And as more succumb it affects me more

Response by SFC Joe S. Davis Jr., MSM, DSL made Sep 7 at 2016 9:49 PM

SFC Joe S. Davis Jr., MSM, DSL — Wed, 07 Sep 2016 21:49:05 -0400

SSgt Jim Gilmore roger that, its mind-blowing to think it sometimes. The pain is so relevant as I get older. I miss all my comrades R.I.P.

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 7 at 2016 9:53 PM

SGT Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 07 Sep 2016 21:53:50 -0400

I had a good friend die at Gander in 1985. I still think about him every day.

Response by Sgt Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 7 at 2016 10:04 PM

Sgt Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 07 Sep 2016 22:04:23 -0400

SSgt Jim Gilmore Yes. I see brothers passing away at an increasing pace, and it saddens me.

Response by SFC George Smith made Sep 7 at 2016 10:08 PM

SFC George Smith — Wed, 07 Sep 2016 22:08:23 -0400

It damn sure does...

Response by 1SG David Williams made Sep 7 at 2016 10:24 PM

1SG David Williams — Wed, 07 Sep 2016 22:24:27 -0400

Yes

Response by CSM Charles Hayden made Sep 8 at 2016 1:58 AM

CSM Charles Hayden — Thu, 08 Sep 2016 01:58:10 -0400

SSgt Jim Gilmore Rally Point has caused me to think of my brother more often!

Response by SSgt Jim Gilmore made Sep 8 at 2016 2:49 AM

SSgt Jim Gilmore — Thu, 08 Sep 2016 02:49:01 -0400

I posted this question mostly to see if it's just me. To be honest this last week has been a real motherf****r. Briefly last Thursday a girl with whom I grew up (lived across the street) passed. Sunday, my brother's mother in law passed. Fifteen minutes after reading that news the son of a friend here in Thailand who was on his annual trip to the states passed from complications after a surgical procedure. His passing hit me particularly hard. We met on line but became good friends when he and his (Thai) wife moved here after retiring. The move here was not going as well as planned and they opted to spend half the year here and the other half CONUS to be with family. We both were stationed here in Thailand during Vietnam. Anyway, thanks for listening.

Response by PO1 Brian Austin made Sep 8 at 2016 4:49 AM

PO1 Brian Austin — Thu, 08 Sep 2016 04:49:23 -0400

Yes, especially when they are younger than me.

Response by SGT David A. 'Cowboy' Groth made Sep 8 at 2016 6:25 AM

SGT David A. 'Cowboy' Groth — Thu, 08 Sep 2016 06:25:51 -0400

It give more of a closer glimpse at our own mortality.

Response by SSgt Boyd Welch made Sep 8 at 2016 9:21 AM

SSgt Boyd Welch — Thu, 08 Sep 2016 09:21:32 -0400

It seems to make me more aware of my mortality than the loss of any other. The exception to the preceding, is the loss of any of the youth that I mentored down through the years but time and tide wait for no man. The memories of serving together come flooding back.

Response by MAJ David Vermillion made Sep 8 at 2016 9:58 AM

MAJ David Vermillion — Thu, 08 Sep 2016 09:58:34 -0400

Yes. Lost a great friend in Vietnam in June 1970. He was with the 5th Special Forces Mike Force.

Response by SFC Gene Estep made Sep 8 at 2016 12:33 PM

SFC Gene Estep — Thu, 08 Sep 2016 12:33:58 -0400

Never thought I had PTSD till I got older, nightmares night sweats tremors must be age or coming closer to your time on earth

Response by LTC Wayne Dandridge made Sep 8 at 2016 12:40 PM

LTC Wayne Dandridge — Thu, 08 Sep 2016 12:40:51 -0400

Yes.

Response by MSG Jay Jackson made Sep 8 at 2016 5:14 PM

MSG Jay Jackson — Thu, 08 Sep 2016 17:14:46 -0400

I agree with all of you, it gets harder as we get older. I lost four in one year in Iraq and I think it does get harder every year.

Response by ENS Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 8 at 2016 10:05 PM

ENS Private RallyPoint Member — Thu, 08 Sep 2016 22:05:42 -0400

I've already lost several friends in my short time in.. It definitely is a somber feeling. I will raise a beer to my fallen friends on the date of their memorial.. Damn Few.

Response by Cpl Justin Goolsby made Sep 9 at 2016 12:04 PM

Cpl Justin Goolsby — Fri, 09 Sep 2016 12:04:34 -0400

Honestly I don't know. I'm not that old, but when I hear that a service member died or took their life, it does take my breath away. I love the Marine Corps, and I personally feel bonded to Marines. If I didn't care so much about my fellow service members, it probably wouldn't affect me as much. I'm sure the same can be said with age. If the loss of a brother still hurts you, it's because you still care about them.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 9 at 2016 5:27 PM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 09 Sep 2016 17:27:37 -0400

it affects me no matter what

Response by SP5 Joel McDargh made Sep 10 at 2016 9:44 PM

SP5 Joel McDargh — Sat, 10 Sep 2016 21:44:12 -0400

Forty four years after returning from Vietnam I was able to make a pilgrimage to a cemetery where one of my friends is buried. It was a journey long overdue with some much needed closure. Squatty was a door gunner on a huey cobra providing support and transportation to our unit. Thirteen days short of ETS he made one last run in an assault on a hilltop held by VC and NVA. Took three rounds to his chest and medivacked to the rear where he was not expected to live. However, he made it eleven days till he got a DJ letter. He gave up the ghost. Last I saw him he shook my hand and said his goodbye as he was twenty seven days short and going home to be a husband and father. Smartass me comes back and tells him, "Momma always told me never count my chickens before they hatch, and you ain't home yet". I have lived with those words ringing in my ears for forty plus years. Finally paid my respects to Squatty and buried the demon which haunted me all these years. Still saddens me, but I have finally moved on.

Response by SGT Timothy Byrd made Sep 15 at 2016 12:22 PM

SGT Timothy Byrd — Thu, 15 Sep 2016 12:22:06 -0400

Yes absolutely it gets harder. I lost a close friend who happen to be 1 of my subordinate soldiers 12 years ago & I can remember it like it was yesterday. I have a drink in his honor every year on his memorial day.

Response by COL John Power made Sep 15 at 2016 1:45 PM

COL John Power — Thu, 15 Sep 2016 13:45:04 -0400

It does for me. I believe, as you age, you get a deeper appreciation for life. You also get a deeper appreciation for what it means to serve your country. I don't think of it as a glimpse at my own mortality. I lost a WWII veteran cousin last year at 98.5 years and realized he was the last of that generation in my family.

Response by LTC Larry Morris made Sep 18 at 2016 7:26 PM

LTC Larry Morris — Sun, 18 Sep 2016 19:26:53 -0400

Yes, in many different ways and at several different levels. I get in the shoulda, coulda, woulda loop and it just wears me out, it is harder and harder to break the loop.

Response by TSgt Ernest Poulin made Jan 3 at 2021 7:30 PM

TSgt Ernest Poulin — Sun, 03 Jan 2021 19:30:21 -0500

I am certainly bothered by loss, though those of yesteryear don't get less sad, they... aw shit, NO it doesn't ever go away. It's always a sadness I feel, not only for the vet getting taken' by the enemy, but for the family of the brother or sister in arms. Keep your head high though Jim! We musn't allow the communists or jihadists to win by keeping us down or taking us out through our own hand.