How do you deal with the, “Grass is Always Greener,” syndrome in the Army?

2018-09-19T22:40:01-04:00

I work at a clinic here on Fort Knox. I feel semi useless and wish I was at a FORSCOM unit where I could actually help soldiers one on one. It’s probably just seeing the other side and looking at only the positives of being in a different unit. Is there a general way, besides “accept it” or “bottle it up”, to handle the “grass is always greener on the other side” syndrome? Or is it just that I have to play the cards that I’ve been dealt?

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 19 at 2018 10:51 PM

2018-09-19T22:51:54-04:00

The grass isn't always greener, but what are you doing to change the fact that you feel useless?

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 19 at 2018 10:53 PM

2018-09-19T22:53:19-04:00

I don't know exactly what's got you down, but if you're doing your job as a Soldier, you are certainly NOT useless. On a separate note, does the Army still have the EFMB? I never got it, but they always wanted medics to try for it.

Response by CPT Jack Durish made Sep 19 at 2018 11:25 PM

2018-09-19T23:25:10-04:00

Send your dog over to pee on their lawn

Response by SSgt J.D. Bowser made Sep 19 at 2018 11:37 PM

2018-09-19T23:37:20-04:00

I was in three different branches. The grass is greener on the other side.

Response by CSM Charles Hayden made Sep 20 at 2018 12:15 AM

2018-09-20T00:15:53-04:00

SGT Private RallyPoint Member In 1953, I was at Ft Knox, in wooden barracks near Godman Airfield.

The unit bulletin board had a notice that Soldiers were needed or Airborne Training! I was not fat, but dumb and lazy! I did not apply - that Army, 1953, did not provide much guidance.

Open your eyes, look around, check on ? the net. Get gone and enjoy, You might have to volunteer - so what !

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 20 at 2018 1:00 AM

2018-09-20T01:00:53-04:00

I know what you mean. I've felt like that in the past, but haven't felt like that in a very long time after "realizing" two things ("realizing" being in quotes because we all know these things, but it's not always at the front of our minds):
1) Nobody in the Army is useless. Basic Training wasn't that difficult to us probably, but the process for joining at all is decently exclusive, and once you look around at a lot of the general public our age (I'm assuming we're around the same age, I enlisted at 18 in 2016), you might realize we're definitely doing something a vast majority of them couldn't. I'm not trying to downplay civilians, some of them couldn't get past MEPS or BCT for reasons they might have 0 control over, and at least they tried. My point is, you're doing something most people aren't able to do for an organization most of them can't be a part of. In reference to the "Grass is greener" problem, consider not even being there at all.
2) You might feel stagnant at the moment, or like you're not doing much, but that just means you're given time to better yourself physically and mentally and prepare for literally whatever it is you want to do with your career. If you don't like where you're at, start using this time to prepare for something bigger. Just keep it in you're head you're working toward SOMETHING.

Sorry for the wall of text, I just know what you might be feeling and thought I'd give the most I could on how I dealt with it.

Response by Capt Daniel Goodman made Sep 20 at 2018 4:42 AM

2018-09-20T04:42:29-04:00

I find that interesting, honest...test !e, been there, done that (BTDT)...I'd wanted the clinical side while in, and needed to white literally, hmest, have my head practically slam!ed into the pavement to realize the truth, promise...I'm gonna help you, I'm gonna teach you, if you want, exactly how...good science, of found, is where you find it...I had to learn to get good at so!ethung I'd never expected to have to do, I just learned that lesson way, way too late to do me any practical good...there's a great line from a movie...no !after where you go, there you are...that being said...it:s your responsibility to turn your lemons into lemonade...God just makes the lemons, you need to make the lemomade...are you on school? Assocs? Bach? Are you volunteering for outside tasks with your unit? Doim everything you can to further it, regardless of how boring it !iht seem at any given instant? Charity drives? What are your ambitions? Goals? Objectives? Aspirations? Are ypumdoimg your PME for promotion? Do you want a career long term? Senior enlisted? Warrant? Commissioned? I've been exactly where you are, promise, enlisted, warrant, commissioned, it:s all the same...are ypu !axing out your performamce evals? Is your appearance, behavior, de!eanor, all above reproach? Is your PT practically superhuman? Do you do sports? Martial arts? Army comnatives program!? What coursework are you taking? Are you camping out in your installation educ ctr? When you can tell !e you're doing all tjat, and utterly conditioning yourself on concentrating where you are NOW, today, tis minute, and utterly forgetting where you'd WANT to be, other than in UOIR kind, then you'll have achieved Nirvana, young Paduwam...trust !e, ambition in a service is a double problem, yours to keep to yourself to avoid losing your way as to where you are NOW, right now, this minute...ambition can !make you lose your way, it !Ade !e lose !ime, for a long to!e, doesn't matter I was blue suit, and you're green suit...your sole function, ypur task, your mission, as a public servant, no less then am elected official, is to help further your unit, only your I'm!ediate unit ultimately !matters, cause without helping it, doing everything you can to help it, you'll never get to your NEXT unit...there was a famous newspaper comedienne, Erma Bombeck, who wrote a book with a really fnny title, The Grass is!Alwaus Greener on the Other Side of the Septic Tank...look it up, you'll see it, promise, of I can find it, I'll send it...trust what I tell you, and believe what I say, OK? As of said before, been there, done that (BTDT), I assure you, promise, OK? If you want to chat, I'm Jere, just ask, anytime, OK? I hope that helps, I'd be eager for your thoughts, also, honest, OK?

Response by Capt Daniel Goodman made Sep 20 at 2018 4:45 AM

2018-09-20T04:45:39-04:00

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/432288.The_Grass_Is_Always_Greener_over_the_Septic_Tank

Here you go...enjoy....

The Grass Is Always Greener over the Septic Tank

"[Erma Bombeck] is marvelously funny, direct as a hypodermic, a virtuoso in the field of suburban living."--Vogue It's the expose to end...

Response by Capt Daniel Goodman made Sep 20 at 2018 4:48 AM

2018-09-20T04:48:40-04:00

And pardon all the typos, OK? This tablet keyboard is pretty God awful, I'm afraid....

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 20 at 2018 4:58 AM

2018-09-20T04:58:56-04:00

PFC Jacob Perry, I don't blame you for feeling the way you do. I was at Knox a few months ago for training and the place looks like a ghost town. There were no people on the weekend. You can wait for your reenlistment window to open and ask for a FORSCOM unit. If you want to go the extra mile you can ask for an airborne assignment which will require you going to Airborne school before you report to your unit or as soon as you get there. I have never had the chance to work in a hospital or clinic and from my experience dealing with them, it is too political and boring.

Response by 1SG Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 20 at 2018 5:55 AM

2018-09-20T05:55:49-04:00

The grass is only greener on the other side of the fence because it's fertilized with someone else's bullshit. Everywhere you go in life you'll run into this scenario.
Focus on the good shit where you are. If you cant find something to focus or or reason to be happy then consider moving. For right, give your unit two years, then update your Assignment Satisfaction Key on AKO, then email your branch manager.

Response by CSM Darieus ZaGara made Sep 20 at 2018 7:07 AM

2018-09-20T07:07:59-04:00

Simple, you will PCS. You are not there for life. You can request a change of Station as well. Ensure the date you request for DEROS accommodates your current tour requirment. While you are there, keep in mind that regardless of where you are, you are serving and supporting this who serve. Thank you for your service.

Response by SSgt GG-15 RET Jim Lint made Sep 20 at 2018 8:48 AM

2018-09-20T08:48:52-04:00

Go to the desert...then you will not have to worry about the grass...or it being green!

Response by LCDR Keith Trepanier made Sep 20 at 2018 10:01 AM

2018-09-20T10:01:41-04:00

There is nothing you can do about thinking the grass is always greener. Just human nature. When I was in the Army it went like this:
In AIT (6 months) "This isn't the real Army. Wait until you get to your first unit."
My first unit (101st Airborne) as a private. "This isn't the real Army. Wait until you get promoted and go to a regular unit then you will see what the Army is like."
Went to flight school: "This isn't like real Army aviation. Wait until you get to your unit as a pilot then you will see what the Army is like."
Got to Germany: "This isn't the real Army. We don't get to fly as much. Wait until you get to a different unit then you will see what the Army is like."
Went Back to the 101st: "This isn't the real Army. They screw us here. We are in the field all the time, and deploy everywhere. Wait until you get to a different unit then you will see what the Army is like."
Left the Army and joined the Coast Guard. Ok, the grass was greener there. But there were still the same sentiments from people who had "been there, done that."

I quickly learned your unit and your assignment is what you make of it. No matter what your job, just work to be the best person in the military at that job. You aren't useless if you are doing the job you are asked to do. You certainly aren't useless if you do it well.

You will always wonder if there is more and that is fine. Just remember that the present isn't as bad as it seems. Every single time I moved, I always had a moment where I looked back and said that last assignment was not as bad as I thought.

So keep the faith and just wait until you get to a different unit. Then you will see what the Army is really like. Just kidding. Good luck.

Response by CW2 Michael Bodnar made Sep 20 at 2018 11:03 AM

2018-09-20T11:03:18-04:00

The grass is greener on the other side, you just have to decide if you want to mow it or not. You get out of the military what you put into it. Yes, things may be challenging where you are but have you asked what you can do to make it more interesting? Can you change your approach towards your current job? Have a chat with your first line supervisor to see what you can do to make the job better from your perspective. Maybe you can seek an alternate job while you there to expand your toolbox.

Response by SPC Matt Sears made Sep 20 at 2018 12:07 PM

2018-09-20T12:07:15-04:00

Sometimes it just takes time for a unit to change. It took my unit around a year and a half before we got an awesome commander and 1sg who actually gave a shit. More missions and morale was through the roof.

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 20 at 2018 1:21 PM

2018-09-20T13:21:18-04:00

Really good question. What I've come to realize is that every assignment, every position, is a learning opportunity. Sometimes the jobs I dreaded the most ended up being the most fulfilling. Do the best you can wherever, and look for opportunities to learn and grow.

Response by MAJ Ken Landgren made Sep 20 at 2018 4:08 PM

2018-09-20T16:08:27-04:00

Sometimes we need to have gratitude for what we have.

Response by MSG Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 20 at 2018 6:32 PM

2018-09-20T18:32:36-04:00

Get out and see what you can enjoy rather than sitting and looking at what you know you don't enjoy.
When I got my orders for Fort Bragg in '86 I decided I hated it and there was no way I was going to like it. I was a Billets Rat for 6 months before I finally took a drive around North Carolina and ended up in Wilmington. I loved it from then on. Well, except when Hurricane Hugo hit and we were in the field for Market Square. Meh, it was a character builder.

Response by SPC John Decker made Sep 20 at 2018 6:50 PM

2018-09-20T18:50:28-04:00

Always look at the positive. I was a 91B (at the time, basic combat medic). I spent some time assigned to a hospital, stateside. I also was assigned to line units. For me, it was always about personalizing my contact with others. I agree completely with SPC Elijah Zaporteza.

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 23 at 2018 12:07 AM

2018-09-23T00:07:34-04:00

Play the cards you have been dealt. Do it to the best of your ability and take advantage of any opportunities that come down the pipe. It will pay off in the long run.

Response by SGT Quentin Moore made Sep 23 at 2018 5:42 PM

2018-09-23T17:42:21-04:00

The grass isn’t always greener on the other side