SGT Private RallyPoint Member 8298885 <div class="images-v2-count-0"></div>I have a question regarding resiliency. This is mostly directed for senior NCO&#39;s (E7 and up) but anyone can answer these questions freely if they wish.<br /><br />Haven&#39;t been feeling very well lately and it seems the last few months have been especially hard. One thing I struggle with more than anything is failure. How to face it, and really I suppose &quot;Getting over it&quot; if that makes sense. I take ownership of my shortcomings and missing the mark, but perhaps personally. Criticism I generally handle well and take it to heart.<br /><br />Has anyone had difficulty with their own past shortcomings and how did you overcome those feelings of doubt? Any advice would help and be appreciated. 2023-05-26T10:03:51-04:00 SGT Private RallyPoint Member 8298885

<div class="images-v2-count-0"></div>I have a question regarding resiliency. This is mostly directed for senior NCO&#39;s (E7 and up) but anyone can answer these questions freely if they wish.<br /><br />Haven&#39;t been feeling very well lately and it seems the last few months have been especially hard. One thing I struggle with more than anything is failure. How to face it, and really I suppose &quot;Getting over it&quot; if that makes sense. I take ownership of my shortcomings and missing the mark, but perhaps personally. Criticism I generally handle well and take it to heart.<br /><br />Has anyone had difficulty with their own past shortcomings and how did you overcome those feelings of doubt? Any advice would help and be appreciated.

2023-05-26T10:03:51-04:00 2023-05-26T10:03:51-04:00 TSgt James Herslebs 8299057

<div class="images-v2-count-0"></div>SGT Wilkinson, I was married at a very young age to the same woman for 24 years when she decided she wanted a divorce. I looked at myself as a complete and utter failure because of this. It took some time and contemplation to finally come to terms with reality. You are truly only in control of yourself and can only guide and encourage others to be responsible functioning human beings. Be the Best Person you can be and put things in perspective. To my knowledge we only had one perfect person walking the earth 2000 years ago and He is still with us in Spirit.

2023-05-26T12:20:19-04:00 2023-05-26T12:20:19-04:00 CPT Private RallyPoint Member 8299075

<div class="images-v2-count-0"></div>Failure is only relative to the amount of tries we put forth. Even video games have numerus lives. <br /><br />For exampled: <br />I failed at my CFA exams and failed each level exam at least once. I am a CFA, and of those that start the process only 10% complete it. So regardless of how one looks at my failure along the way I&#39;m among the 10% that finished it. <br /><br />Then I raced motorcycles and finished dead last my first race, and 7 years later was starting on the front row. <br /><br />I failed at becoming an officer way back in the 90&#39;s when I didn&#39;t get selected for an Academy. <br />Then I failed again when I tried to go OCS back in 2011, and was too old. <br />Then I enlisted and submitted an Officers Direct commission packet in 2013 and wasn&#39;t selected. I submitted again in 2014 (after learning the &quot;game&quot; and played up to seeking a commission in the most vacant MOS), and was selected. <br /><br />Now, oh irony, when I was passed over trying to get an officer academy path way back in the 90s&#39; I was pursing Logistics. Logistics is a big word, and one of the board members of the selection committee at the time asked me (only a HS kid at the time) to explain it to him (which I correctly did) Anyway, I got the congressional nomination, but not selected by the Academy itself. <br /><br />Right here right now, I am a Logistical Captain. <br /><br />My Drill SGT asked me rhetorically of course, why the hell would I want to be a 40 y/o butter bar. I quietly bit my lip holding my thoughts to myself:<br />I&#39;m not going to be a 40 year old butter bar. I&#39;m going to be a 60 year old Colonel. <br /><br />Which in retrospect isn&#39;t going to happen. LTC probably, COL no. <br /><br />You fail when you quit. The time line to success can always be pushed to the right.

2023-05-26T12:43:13-04:00 2023-05-26T12:43:13-04:00 SGM Mikel Dawson 8302744

<div class="images-v2-count-0"></div>Failure is stopping. If you don&#39;t make the grade the first time, then learn and go again. In my civilian job as a Farrier, I failed my first try to get my certification, but learned what I really needed to do to complete the task. Next go around, I made it. When you keep trying you have not failed. Ask yourself: Is your cup half empty or half full? My cup is always half full.

2023-05-29T08:48:48-04:00 2023-05-29T08:48:48-04:00 SMSgt Lawrence McCarter 8303778

<div class="images-v2-count-0"></div>There is only a failure if after a setback You don&#39;t rise up to either correct or not make the same mistake again. Life is a set of ups and downs for everybody but life goes on and to make it bearable You have to rise above and not dwell on the setbacks which everyone of us experience from time to time.

2023-05-30T02:10:54-04:00 2023-05-30T02:10:54-04:00 A1C Medrick "Rick" DeVaney 8303806

<div class="images-v2-count-0"></div>WHEW.. This Question Is Wide Open..<br />.Because It Depends Upon SO MANY Things When You Use The Word &quot;FAILURE..<br />Did I FAIL To Wake Up On Time To Watch A Basketball Game?<br />Or Did I Fail To Save Someones Life When I Easily Could Have?<br />FIRST: I&#39;M A JUNIOR High School DROP OUT..... BUT I Educated Myself (See Bio)<br />And By Doing So, It Was One Of The BEST Decisions To Make... <br />SO, Did I FAIL To Graduate High School? YES.. I QUIT School AfterThe 8th GRADE.<br /> But I&#39;m FAR More Educated Than A High School Graduate.<br />I Talked My Way, And LIED My Azz Off To Get A Job I Wanted:<br /> &quot;Industrial Purchasing Agent For F.MC., In MICHIGAN<br />And Became The Purchasing Department Director For F.M.C In It&#39;s INDIANA Plant, <br />About 2 Years Later, By-Passing Assistant Director, And Was The Youngest Purchasing Department Manager In F.M.C.&#39;s Division History......<br /> When I Left F.M.C. I Returned To Michigan To Become Self Employed. At Becoming SELF EMPLOYED Was Easy, But My First 3 Business FAILED.... And I FAILED To Find Employment For Quite Awhile. Then Went Back To Self Employment And SUCCEEDED.... 27 Years Later I Sold The Businesses And I RETIRED......SO, Did I Fail Or Succeed?.....I Did BOTH. <br /> But It Was My FAILURES Which Became Lessons Which Lead Me To SUCCESS....<br />To Succeed, One Must Understand THIS...&quot;You WILL FAIL, And Perhaps MAY Times, BEFORE You SUCCEED.... So Learn From Your SO CALLED Failures Because THEY&#39;RE The Ones Building The Roads To Success. ...<br />I HOPE You Understand What I&#39;m Saying And Discover We ALL Fail.......<br />The Difference Is: Some Learn From Failures While Other Who MAY Have Succeeded... Gave UP!

2023-05-30T04:19:52-04:00 2023-05-30T04:19:52-04:00 SFC Casey O'Mally 8303911

<div class="images-v2-count-0"></div>It&#39;s tough. I won&#39;t lie. If failing means nothing to you, I would say that you weren&#39;t invested and probably deserved to fail anyway. I was playing HORSE with a couple of kids yesterday, and lost. I wasn&#39;t failing on our pose, but I also wasn&#39;t trying very hard because I didn&#39;t want to embarrassed a 13 year old who was taking it VERY serious. Yes, I failed, and I didn&#39;t care - I wasn&#39;t invested.<br /><br />But my ssumption is this is not what you are talking about. You are talking about when you really try, you invest, times, energy, thought, skill, and you very ESSENCE into success, and still fail. There are a couple ways you can go from that point. Both will protect your psyche, but only one leads to a good life.<br /><br />First, you can just stop trying. As noted at the top, if you never really try, it doesn&#39;t hurt when you fail. This is a solution. I would argue that it is not a GOOD solution, but it IS a solution. And it does protect ego, for the most part.<br /><br />The better option, in my opinion, is to view failure as an opportunity. Everything I life is a lesson, if we let it be. And failure is often a far better teacher than success is. When you fail, step back. Take the time to take a good, hard, HONEST look at the project. <br /><br />What did you do well? What can you improve? <br /><br />Did you have teammates/partners? Were they the RIGHT teammates? <br /><br />What about leaders? Did they give you what you needed to be successful? <br /> If yes, did you properly utilize? <br /> If no, how do you influence to get those resources/guidance/etc. Next time?<br /><br />What about subordinates? Did they have what they needed for their piece of the puzzle?<br /> Did they have the training?<br /> Did they have he resources?<br /> Did they have the time?<br /> Did they have the guidance?<br /> What can YOU do to make THEM more successful next time?<br /><br />We&#39;re the circumstances right for the project? Is there a better time to try next time?<br /><br /><br /><br />If you look at failure as a learning opportunity then you never really fail. Even when you don&#39;t succeed, you still learn and grow. Whichbis it&#39;s own achievement. Even if you never try that same project again, you have learned things, grown as a person, gained insight. So on the nextvprohect, whatever it is, you will have more wisdom and better perspective. And if the next project it&#39;s the SAME project, so much the better.<br /><br /><br />I will also say, however, that there is also tremendous wisdom in understanding your limitations. There are a lot of folks who will tell you the sky is the limit and our only limitations are what we put on ourselves. They are full of it. I am a middle aged, short, fat, white dude with limited coordination. I will never be in the NBA. Setting that as a goal is unrealistic. Even if I had started when I was 5.... I&#39;m 5&#39;8&quot;. That&#39;s as tall as I will EVER be. How many 5&#39;8&quot; guys make it to the NBA? How many of them were uncoordinated? So understanding your limitations is important, too. MOST obstacles CAN be overcome with hard work, determination, and persistence. But learn to recognize those which cannot.

2023-05-30T07:12:00-04:00 2023-05-30T07:12:00-04:00 SSG Rick Miller 8303988

<div class="images-v2-count-0"></div>It&#39;s only failure if you don&#39;t learn from it, and keep going. True failure is quitting, giving up. Don&#39;t let something or someone live in your head rent free. Take the lessons learned, use them to improve at whatever the task is. Nobody knows all, nobody never makes a mistake. Self doubt is natural, but only in small doses. If you let self doubt overwhelm you, in our line of work, there is a good chance you&#39;ll get somebody bleeding or dead. Figure out why there was a failure, face it head on, correct it, then move out smartly.

2023-05-30T08:40:26-04:00 2023-05-30T08:40:26-04:00 Lt Col Timothy Cassidy-Curtis 8304239

<div class="images-v2-count-0"></div>Look at President Trump. Everybody (who opposes him, and some of his friends) are talking about his failures. Look at what he does. He doesn&#39;t stop. He never gives up. He keeps going. There&#39;s a model.

2023-05-30T12:14:50-04:00 2023-05-30T12:14:50-04:00 SFC Private RallyPoint Member 8304305

<div class="images-v2-count-0"></div>With resolve.

2023-05-30T13:18:16-04:00 2023-05-30T13:18:16-04:00 SSG Byron Hewett 8304491

<div class="images-v2-count-0"></div>ask yourself, what did I learn? what can I do to improve or not repeat the mistake?<br />Life is a learning process of opportunities, did I learn from my failure or did I fail to learn.<br />there isn&#39;t anything that can&#39;t be fixed that isn&#39;t broke already. <br />If you have to repeat a school or a PT test or weapons quals easy fix, even a promotion board, you haven&#39;t failed you just learned what you need work on to succeed for the next time around that&#39;s how life works it&#39;s one big test everyday to learn from, when you fail you learn from what went wrong and what went right and what can be done better just like an A.A.R., the only time you fail is when you quit so you can&#39;t ever stop. its all a process of learning even in being resilient and to keep going when you feel that you can&#39;t. keep smiling keep learning =0)

2023-05-30T16:59:59-04:00 2023-05-30T16:59:59-04:00 CSM Darieus ZaGara 8305244

<div class="images-v2-count-0"></div>Failure is but a fleeting moment, we make the mistake, we are corrected and correct the mistake. We than catalog that knowledge in our data box, and never make the same mistake. As time goes by and we see that we are able to handle a similarvsituation evening guiding others through. This is how we build that (preverbal) Kit Bag. <br /><br />We are all developed a similar way, and lord knows we all make mistakes. To deal with it we know that it is a process and as long as we learn and grow there is no failure only learning. <br /><br />Get back in the bike and see how far you can ride this time. <br /><br />Proverbs, ZaGara

2023-05-31T07:28:26-04:00 2023-05-31T07:28:26-04:00 2023-05-26T10:03:51-04:00