How do you offer help in a way that another veteran will accept it?

Capt Brandon Charters — Mon, 20 Sep 2021 20:37:28 -0400

As veterans, we’re very prideful and usually the last ones to ask for help. I personally started changing the way I approached friends after knowing there was a feeling that they were a burden. I just started telling them what I was going to do. Usually it’s an offer that takes something off their plate - which will hopefully lead to more accepted offerings. I’ve found vets turn down general “how can I help” check ins. I think it takes persistence and thinking about their pain as much as you can. Breaking through that first barrier of help is always the hardest. How have you approached offering your support in a way that will be accepted?

Response by SFC Stephen King made Sep 20 at 2021 8:57 PM

SFC Stephen King — Mon, 20 Sep 2021 20:57:48 -0400

Listen more talk less. I found letting others talk and share their perspective as a great way to build connection.

Response by SPC Nancy Greene made Sep 20 at 2021 11:54 PM

SPC Nancy Greene — Mon, 20 Sep 2021 23:54:02 -0400

Capt Brandon Charters as a retired Behavior Therapist, I learned quickly each person is different and so is my approach. Sometimes just engaging in a conversation can lead to much further communication. There is no simple answer, all we can do is try...

Response by SSG Edward Tilton made Sep 21 at 2021 10:35 AM

SSG Edward Tilton — Tue, 21 Sep 2021 10:35:51 -0400

I do my part by not sitting in the lobby with other sick veterans

Response by Janeen Rosenberg made Sep 21 at 2021 2:34 PM

Janeen Rosenberg — Tue, 21 Sep 2021 14:34:44 -0400

I'm Retired and I find Veterans everywhere where I live and offer any service they may need. I bring my biz card everywhere especially at yard sales. I am extroverted and love people and I am gifted with an enate ability to recognize Military Families since I've been with them all my life. I try to help them Build a Case anywhere over the phone to connect with Veterans and their families

Response by SGT David A. 'Cowboy' Groth made Sep 21 at 2021 3:12 PM

SGT David A. 'Cowboy' Groth — Tue, 21 Sep 2021 15:12:43 -0400

If they need an ear to listen to them, I let them use mine, just being there to let them get whatever is on their chest off, it is normally appreciated better than being told what they should do, they normally come up with the answer while they're talking Capt Brandon Charters

Response by SSgt Richard Kensinger made Sep 22 at 2021 1:00 PM

SSgt Richard Kensinger — Wed, 22 Sep 2021 13:00:38 -0400

I make a point to talk to every vet I meet. And one of my clinical research projects is exclusively related to vets.
Rich

Response by SGT Steven Wade made Sep 22 at 2021 1:04 PM

SGT Steven Wade — Wed, 22 Sep 2021 13:04:14 -0400

By leaving no other recourse that that shame is degradation is also in the mix warriors are destined to die in battle but treat one like he is in boot then the is time too chow you throw down. Then if that doesn't work plan B

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 23 at 2021 8:42 AM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Thu, 23 Sep 2021 08:42:45 -0400

Having empathy toward the person who’s hurting is necessary. Actively listening to them without talking. Actually caring about them expecting nothing in return. I’ve been on the other side and I can’t remember how many supposed “counselor” business cards I threw away. I just wanted someone to listen, someone who maybe experienced the same things. I came so close to suicide. It was the only solution I could find at the time. I was saved and helped.

There are tell tell signs. You must know what they are and become aware that you may be their last hope. Nothing is more important than helping your brother or sister that’s hurting.