What are some tips on how to be a good Private?

2022-06-30T22:45:42-04:00

So I’m at my first duty station, just arrived a week ago. I’m obviously the new private that doesn’t know much. I struggle with retaining information if it’s not hands on learning, I really do try though. Im just frustrated these last few days looking like a jerk because I don’t know anything in front of my team. I don’t wanna look weak, I wanna get bigger and stronger/smarter. I haven’t been home in 7 months and about to go on deployment in a few months, life is crazy right now. Do you have any tips? I really want to be here but these last few days just have been a mental toll more than anything. I know it’s not supposed to be easy.

Response by MSG Private RallyPoint Member made Jun 30 at 2022 10:56 PM

2022-06-30T22:56:25-04:00

Of course you don't know anything in front of your team. All you know is doctrine. You have yet to learn operational/real world. Slow down. Breath. Eyes and ears open, mouth shut other than to ask questions IOT learn. It takes time to get bigger, better and smarter. Patience, young Padawan.

Response by Capt Brandon Charters made Jun 30 at 2022 10:57 PM

2022-06-30T22:57:27-04:00

You’re doing well, Chase. I wasn’t a Private, but being away from home for the first time is hard…especially when the stress of a new job (and being the new guy) is making it harder. Don’t feel like you have to learn everything tomorrow. Just soak in as much as you can and put in the best effort you can. Help other teammates around you if there are things you excel at. It all comes down learning your team, your new job, command, and putting in the best effort possible. You’ll find the people in your unit that you can count on for advice and support…and you’ll learn who you want to avoid. It just takes time. Really wish you the best. Please keep us posted on how things go.

Response by SSG Jeffrey Leake made Jun 30 at 2022 11:29 PM

2022-06-30T23:29:32-04:00

Nothing is easy when you're the FNG. Don't over stress your situation. Listen to your leaders, take notes, ask questions. Talk with your squad and team leader. You'll learn a lot on your deployment. Don't rush things.

Response by MAJ Private RallyPoint Member made Jun 30 at 2022 11:37 PM

2022-06-30T23:37:37-04:00

The best thing you can do is just listen and learn. It’s tough being away from home, I get it. Hell I hate not being closer to home, and I’m 35 years old. You’ll make friends, and they’ll be lifelong, you just have to prove yourself. Be willing to help in any situation. If you get bored at work, and you will, ask your leadership if there’s anything you can do. Guys that sit around and do nothing when there’s seemingly nothing to do are a dime a dozen. There’s always work to be done, just be willing to find it. Want to be smarter? Read. There are reading lists out there for every rank. Want to be stronger? Do more than PRT on your own time. Lift heavy weights fast. Get into functional fitness. I can guarantee you that alone will help with any mental toll this is taking on you. Create discipline in all aspects of your life (reading, lifting, running, eating, etc.) because when motivation fails, and it will…a lot, discipline will kick in. Lastly, never be afraid to ask for help. You’ve already taken a step that most won’t: posting this question and asking for advice.

Response by LTC Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 1 at 2022 12:24 AM

2022-07-01T00:24:09-04:00

You did the right thing to ask for advice.

1.It is ok to be your own worst critic but forgive yourself and Just go with the flow.

2. Just listen to your corporals and Sergeants.

3. I remember corresponding online with an active duty Sergeant out of Fort hood. His biggest problems with Junior enlisted was dealing with those who drank too much, dealing with those who didn't pay their bills and dealing with those with personal problems. Do not open up candidly to those in your unit until you know who they really are because you may not like them and they may not be your battle buddy.

4. Talking candidly to your squad leader or your team leader is a different story. Just be careful with your Junior enlisted until you really get to know them.

5. Even if you are not religious, talk to a chaplain if you have issues.

6. Always do more than the minimum.

7. A full-time active duty Lieutenant Colonel had this on his wall. If you live by this, you will be successful.

I was enlisted before becoming an Officer.

I was the oldest E-4 in my training Battalion. I felt strange. People mocked me. I was in the ARNG so after basic and AIT was over, I went home.

Each and every unit that I went to had good people and not so good people.

Here are some resiliency training slides. The Army has issues with people not being able to cope or sometimes they feel down or don't feel confident. To minimize this, they give classes on resiliency training and I'm sure you will get them sooner or later at your first Duty station.

Just save these slides on your smartphone or laptop for future reference.

Thank you for reaching out to us here at RP

Response by Sgt Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 1 at 2022 12:48 AM

2022-07-01T00:48:47-04:00

PV2 Private RallyPoint Member Chase, listen and observe the actions of other soldiers that are squared away. You will make mistakes, so learn from them so that you do not make the same mistake twice. What you are feeling has been felt by the rest of us so do not let the frustration get to you. Best wishes on a great career!

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 1 at 2022 1:23 AM

2022-07-01T01:23:41-04:00

Don't be afraid to look like you don't know anything. Doing that will keep you from learning. People who are afraid to look dumb, are afraid to take chances, and that leads to missed opportunities and learning. Nothing is worse than a leader who's more interested in looking good.

Every time I have PCSed, the new unit I arrived to seemed like a completely different Army. Completely different planning models, acronyms and terms, different and newer equipment, or sometimes really old equipment. One unit uses a SharePoint portal to process all admin actions, another uses operations orders for everything, one does everything last minute through word of mouth and another does nothing outside the long range calendar. Your next squad when you move may use completely different call signs, reports, trip tickets, movement briefs, etc. You're always the new guy when you show up, so don't be afraid to look weak or dumb - nobody looks dumber than the guy who refuses to ask questions

Response by SrA John Monette made Jul 1 at 2022 7:45 AM

2022-07-01T07:45:48-04:00

Your NCOs are there to help you learn and become a better soldier. Have thick skin and expect some pranks. They're all in good fun. Every new guy gets initiated that way. Like others have said, ask questions, listen, and watch. If you aren't sure about something, ask. Better to ask and look like a fool than think you know what someone wants and be totally incorrect. These first few months will be the toughest. But you will also develop lifelong bonds.

Response by SFC Casey O'Mally made Jul 1 at 2022 8:18 AM

2022-07-01T08:18:59-04:00

Narrow your focus. You are an Infantryman, but that doesn't mean you are the ONLY Infantryman. It also doesn't mean you need to know EVERYTHING about being in the Infantry. You have a duty position, learn THAT position. Foucs (for now) on learning everything you can about your weapon system. To include assemble, disassemble, maintenance, proper deployment, quick battle drills to load, unload, and reduce stoppage, max range and max effective range, and purpose for that weapon system within the team and squad. If you are light infantry, understand your position and role in a dismounted patrol. If you are mech / Stryker infantry, understand your vehicle and role within the vehicle.

Worry about the BASICS, and get very, VERY good at them. THEN you can start expanding your focus. Your NCOs are there to help you learn, but ALSO to worry about the larger picture, so that you CAN just focus on the basics.

Next thing. Never EVER be afraid to ask your NCOs for help. You will have to learn there is a right time and a wrong time to ask (like don't interrupt if they are talking to the formation), but if you need help, ASK. Any NCO that refuses to help a Private that asks for it does not deserve to be an NCO. Period. I don't even care if it's "their" Private. THAT IS WHAT NCOs DO.

Last thing. Cut yourself some slack. You WILL screw up. You are a Private. We EXPECT you to screw up. That doesn't mean you shouldn't try or shouldn't care, no! Try your hardest, and when you screw up, figure out what what wrong and FIX IT! But once you screw up, learn your lesson and MOVE ON. If you dwell on your screw ups, rather than moving on prepared to do better, well... You never move on, and you never do better. Remember that you are still LEARNING, accept this, and just work on being better today than yesterday, and better tomorrow than today.

Now.... Regarding that homesickness. Use your technology, man! I am sure you have a phone and/or computer. Call home! Hell, call home daily, if you need to. On my last deployment, I had a scheduled time to call my fiance every single day. Some days I didn't make it because of mission, but the goal was every day. It was usually only 10-15 minutes, but it meant a lot to both of us. And that was as a SFC with 17 years and three previous deployments. Nothing wrong with staying connected to the people you love and who love you. Nothing AT ALL wrong with it. I know it's not as good as an actual visit home. Hopefully your unit will do a block leave pre-deployment. But even if they don't, that technology can help a TON.

Response by SSgt Christophe Murphy made Jul 1 at 2022 8:24 AM

2022-07-01T08:24:58-04:00

You aren't expected to know everything at this point. The best thing you can do is be a sponge. Absorb all you can and get note taking gear on you at all times to help you. Stay humble and focus on the basics. Everything else will come with time. I also recommend doing some mindful and breathing exercises. They will help you manage the stress.

Response by SGM Mikel Dawson made Jul 1 at 2022 8:41 AM

2022-07-01T08:41:34-04:00

You aint the Lone Ranger, every Private goes through what you are going through. Rome wasn't built in a day, it takes time to learn. Like everyone else said, eye, ears open, mouth shut, listen, and if you got a question, ask. Yea, sometimes you might get a raft of sh!t, but that is being a FNG. Drive on.

Response by SFC Ralph E Kelley made Jul 1 at 2022 8:57 AM

2022-07-01T08:57:10-04:00

When I got soldiers and NCOs into my scout teams, crews, sections and platoons, I would brief them with these words:
Obedience to Orders -
Follow the orders given to you by your chain of command no matter if its a PFC appointed to a detail, an NCO or Officer giving it to you.
Performance -
Perform each task assigned by those in authority over you to the best of your ability.
Teamwork -
Work as a part of the team to accomplish all assigned tasks. Be willing to assume new responsibilities for the things you know and surely will learn as you progress. Soon you will be the PFC showing the new PV2 "How-To-Do-It".
Appearance -
Maintain your uniforms and equipment while learning them thoroughly, focus on keeping calm, be physically fit.
Truthfulness -
Be up-front as to what you know and don't wiggle around when asked a question when you don't know the answer. If I don't know where you are in your skills then it will be harder to bring you up to snuff.
Attitude - I followed two rules that got me to the other side of some bad situations:
1. Don't Quit.
2, Keep your Sense of Humor.
Good Luck Brother. You are not alone.

Response by SGT Dave Tracy made Jul 1 at 2022 11:58 AM

2022-07-01T11:58:13-04:00

1. Check your ego.
2. Refer to #1.
3. Listen(!) to what you are told; don't "interpret" what you are told.
4. Treat the "barracks lawyers" advice with a grain of salt.
5. Refer to #1.
6. Be the example of "what right looks like" in all you do.
7. Be a sponge and soak up all you see and hear.
8. Refer to #1.
9. Go easy on yourself, you are new to the job ("lifestyle" is a better word).
10. Roll with the punches; and you'll get a lot of them.
11. Seek guidance from those who have been around a while.
12. Take notes and observe carefully-this relates to Point #7.
13. Find the time to mentally relax...however you do that.
14. Be an Army Knowledge Knower. Aside from Army Regulations, I recommend the Ranger Handbook for any Grunt.
15. Please don't fall for the ol' "Get me a box of grid squares" gag.

Oh, and...
16. Refer to #1

Response by MSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 1 at 2022 2:48 PM

2022-07-01T14:48:56-04:00

I don’t have anything to add, you have received a lot of good advice here! But I do wish you all the best!

Response by SSG Brian L. made Jul 1 at 2022 7:30 PM

2022-07-01T19:30:17-04:00

Just know that will pass.... you will look back and laugh one day... I promise

Response by SSG Bob Robertson made Jul 2 at 2022 10:02 AM

2022-07-02T10:02:21-04:00

Yes. First thing you want to find for yourself is some map grids. The more you collect and give to your sergeant the more likely he will think you've got it going on.

Response by CAPT Kevin B. made Jul 2 at 2022 1:43 PM

2022-07-02T13:43:00-04:00

So much great advice from the SNCO community. I've started from scratch several times in my life, the second time as an E-1. With everything said, don't forget the perspective piece. You are in a period of drinking from a firehose. It's tough to swallow only the good stuff. But your eyes and ears work. Observe the quality and ineptness out there. Focus on becoming the former and not the later. You will see things you don't understand. You can't process all of it, but you can be selective on what you do. Good NCOs will keep their eye out for you and steer you in the right direction. BTW, don't wait. Focus on the task at hand and step forward ready to do the next one. Don't sit and wait. Get up and seek. Always report task completion immediately. There is an old saying that no good deed goes unpunished. It's true, but everything else gets punished more. If you get a larger and more independant task, that's a sign that your competence is being noticed. Not a bad thing.

Response by MSgt Earl King made Jul 2 at 2022 1:57 PM

2022-07-02T13:57:42-04:00

Yep. let your team members teach you how to become a team member?

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 3 at 2022 11:41 PM

2022-07-03T23:41:15-04:00

I'll add that don't worry about getting laughed at, or poked fun of or intimidated for asking questions.

Sometimes the quickest way to getting information is allowing someone to lord their superiority over you.

That said.............. as a PVT don't over think it.

There are three kinds of soldiers in a Commander's computer.

1) Those with individual file folders with their name on it for disciplinary administrative action, and flag actions.

2) Those with individual file folders with their name on it for promotions and awards filled with DA 638's.

3) Those without individual file folders at all that disappear into administrative clutter of just running a company. These soldiers aren't flagged, aren't late on training or medical appointments, and are lining up their ducks for the next promotion or advancement.

#3 should be your first goal.

Here's a little simple recommendation. Print out your Clothing Record, and check off all the equipment you have been issued to make sure you have it.

If every PVT passed PT, wasn't late on medical, kept up to date on annual training and had accountability over all their issued equipment, and showed up in the right place, right time, right uniform then we almost wouldn't need squad leaders.

Response by SP5 Anita Odell made Jul 6 at 2022 7:00 PM

2022-07-06T19:00:50-04:00

Listen intently, Private. Remind yourself you are doing this for your country, not to get a paycheck. When you’re in class and it’s something you e never heard about before like guns, tanks, planes from another country, relate it in some way to something you know back home. Hold your head up, be courageous, and listen to the drill sergeants/cadre. Jump when they say jump. No questions.

Response by SFC Charles Dennis made Jul 6 at 2022 7:55 PM

2022-07-06T19:55:34-04:00

The best advise I can give is the same advise I was given as a PV2. Always have pen and paper with you to take notes on any information given to you. Always show up to formations 15 minutes early in the proper uniform and with all required items needed for the training, tasking, and or mission. You should never have to be told you need a haircut. Always ask for clarification on anything you do not understand. And lastly, but most importantly, ALWAYS listen to your NCOs. Your NCOs are there to train you, instill/maintain discipline, supervise the Soldiers assigned to their care, and to implement the the orders of the officers/NCOs in a fair and impartial manner.

Talk to your NCO and let him or her know what issues you are having. You will be surprised by what assistance they can give you.

Response by Sgt Theresa Moore made Jul 6 at 2022 9:07 PM

2022-07-06T21:07:08-04:00

I would say to you as my friend, everyone has been where you’re standing. Not everything comes easy, it can be a struggle. Don’t give up, and don’t give in either. You are just starting out on your career. Things will come with time. If you’re truly in doubt, talk to your Fist Sergeant privately, talk to your Chaplin privately. Most of all I will tell you to believe in yourself. You didn’t get this far by chance. You worked hard, did what you were told. You can do this! Have faith in yourself.

Response by SPC Paul Rascoe made Jul 6 at 2022 10:57 PM

2022-07-06T22:57:28-04:00

Being a good Private entails using the life skills, courtesy, wisdom and common sense you should have learned from your parents and teachers.

Response by Cpl Lamont Ellis made Jul 7 at 2022 1:59 AM

2022-07-07T01:59:41-04:00

First off, I wish your mind and body wellness now and in the future. You cannot effectively do your job if you are not mentally together. Although it may sound contrary, you should seek guidance first from your squad and platoon leaders. If this is not helpful simply be candid about what you need in order to accomplish YOUR mission effectively. Remember, before you are of any use to others, you must take care of yourself. This does not make you look weak, it actually says that you care enough about your unit and it’s mission accomplishment than anything. You are simply trying to be the best you can be by staying engaged in your responsibilities. Again, I wish you wellness. Have a blessed military career!

Response by SGT Ruben Lozada made Jul 10 at 2022 2:55 PM

2022-07-10T14:55:49-04:00

I believe all branches of the Military is a learning experience. I know that I've learned a lot while I was in the Military. Between being in Navy and Army I've learned a lot and took a lot of notes and asked a lot of questions. One way of learning what was going on. Switching over to another branch was a real eye opener. I had to learn the ways of another branch. It's not impossible to achieve whatever You put Your mind to achieve. Just take it one day at a time and always seek guidance from Your team leaders and squad leaders. That's what they are there for. Look at them as mentors, they are there to guide you and mold you into a great Soldier.

Response by CPL Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 13 at 2022 9:22 AM

2022-07-13T09:22:53-04:00

Life as a private is pretty much always gonna suck, but the biggest tip I can give you is just make sure to show that you’re making an effort. If you have good leaders, they’ll meet you halfway as long as you’re putting in the work. Experience is going to do a lot for you, you should consider yourself lucky to be deploying so early in your career. You’ll learn a lot, bond with your platoon, and it will set you apart from newer privates who show up after.

Response by SSG Rick Miller made Jul 13 at 2022 12:40 PM

2022-07-13T12:40:34-04:00

Take a step back, and just catch your breath for a minute. You're new to all this Army shit, so of course you don't know things. Remember, you have two ears and one mouth. Listen twice as much as you talk. Ask questions when you don't know/understand. Look for the guys with at least two stripes to ask those questions. Then go ask the guys with the sham shield. Remember that each and every one of them has been you at some point in the past. Pay attention to the answers you get. Give it some time, you won't become bigger/smarter/stronger overnight. It takes more than a couple months to get really good at this stuff. On deployment, be aware of all that is around you, keep your head on a swivel, keep your weapon clean, and make sure your head and your ass are wired tight. You will learn an amazing amount of things while deployed. As SFC Livingston says, patience young Padawan.

Response by CPT Earl George made Jul 13 at 2022 1:07 PM

2022-07-13T13:07:31-04:00

be observant, keep mouth shut as much as possible. be on time everywhere and look sharp.

Response by SPC John Tacetta made Jul 13 at 2022 1:19 PM

2022-07-13T13:19:54-04:00

Look to your NCOs, make every formation and choose your friends wisely. Right now you may feel you know nothing, but that will change with time.

Response by SGT Jerry Walker made Jul 13 at 2022 1:46 PM

2022-07-13T13:46:44-04:00

IS this an obvious answer to the question the way it was worded? Obedience really would help the private in question. When I was in the Army they only asked me to do what I was supposed to do, anyhow.

Response by CPL T.A. Nelson made Jul 14 at 2022 9:08 AM

2022-07-14T09:08:44-04:00

Follow orders! If it is an unlawful order and will not cost harm or loss for someone - follow the order and then go see your chaplain. A soldier is only as good as his/her chain of command allow them to be but you have to stay in your lane and concentrate on each task step by step. Take notes that will help you to retain the information that you may not be able to fully remember...

Response by PVT Ted Rodosovich made Jul 14 at 2022 9:48 AM

2022-07-14T09:48:50-04:00

For religious bullying email [login to see]

Response by Sgt Ivan Boatwright made Jul 14 at 2022 10:30 AM

2022-07-14T10:30:14-04:00

Shut up, listen to those with the most experience, study your job, and do your best. Stay away from braggers, troublemakers, and shitbirds.

Response by SPC Gary C. made Aug 2 at 2022 1:56 AM

2022-08-02T01:56:45-04:00

Like others have said keep your eyes and ears open, mouth shut (unless it's to ask questions). Learn as much as you can. 15 minutes early is on time, on time is late, if a formation is at 0900 be there in the right uniform and squared away at 0845. Pick and choose your friends carefully. Just as there are E-1 though E-4 that would stab you in the back, there are some NCO's that will also. Don't go out and buy a car with your first pay check. Don't be a barracks Rat. Yes you have a lot to learn and it'll seem like you are getting hit from all sides at once, but you need to have some down time to unwind, relax & recharge your batteries. Have your uniform for the next day ready before you go to bed.

Response by PO2 Ronnie Chandler made Aug 4 at 2022 7:44 PM

2022-08-04T19:44:21-04:00

The biggest thing is breath ! Like everyone is saying ask questions watch what others do. Be yourself. If you get overwhelmed tell somebody we all were there at one time

Response by CPL Brian Baumgartner made Aug 7 at 2022 8:54 PM

2022-08-07T20:54:24-04:00

Keep a notepad in your shoulder pocket. Write down every acronym and term you don't know. Write down what you are told to do. Write down SOP/process/COA. Write down anything also new to you. Review it in your off time; you have a huge advantage in being able to fill in the blanks with the Internet. Carry a pair of gloves and EARPRO and EYEPRO with you at all times you are in your duty uniform, as well as your tags and ID and barracks key. Memorize your weapon and other equipment serial numbers. Memorize your chain of command up to division. Soak up information like a sponge. Only ask questions on the spot if you NEED to know right then. Speak little other than to acknowledge and to volunteer for every detail.

If you have a POV, arrive fifteen minutes prior to every time you are given (so if you are told ten minutes prior, pretend the requirement is twenty-five minutes instead). If you lack a POV, arrive an additional ten minutes prior.

If you have a POV, keep it squared away and secure. Put USAA renter's insurance on your armor and your brain bucket and your plates and other equipment, as well as your personal electronics, because there is almost always some POS at a barracks low enough to steal from you, and you likely will still have to pay for the lost equipment. Do not try to take charge, but when you know what you are doing, do not try to limit your competence and responsibility to the rank on your chest. If you are an eleven bullet-catcher and a buck private, you need to be able to max your PT test, qualify Expert, and know your tasks and drills. (battle drills, first aid, calling in a nine line, radio operation, weapon capabilities, etc.- stuff you covered in detail in basic). Make those your biggest goals and work on them off duty if you can.

Weekends: Do not blow your paycheck on stuff like clubs, strippers, alcohol or pimping your ride. Every attractive business around a military installation makes its money off dumb privates. If you are under twenty-one, avoid parties altogether. Do not make ANY major decisions (vehicle purchase, big electronics purchases) without requesting advice from your squad leader, who should also talk to your platoon leader. Do not buy a new vehicle, do not buy any vehicle that would require more than twenty percent of your monthly salary. You will be hammered on insurance and on loan rates, and you can't simply add a side job. Remember, everyone who loans you money or uses installments knows they will get their cut from you no matter what- you have a guaranteed government check, they can go to your first sergeant if anything manages to interrupt your payments, and they almost certainly will have the money taken directly out of your paycheck without you even seeing it.

Spend time with your team leader or squad leader on a weekend; someone should be inviting you to some function like a BBQ. Try to befriend the E-3s and E-4s. Get a mentor. If no one is reaching out to you, request a PRIVATE counselling/mentoring session with your squad leader or team leader, and request permission to speak freely. Explain your goals and your concerns and your doubts. Help your fellow privates get better, especially where you are stronger than them, and of course ask their help at improving yourself.

Any leader will have seen scores of new privates like you, so your situation is very common. Obviously no one wants to be the weakest link. At the same time, you seem to want to actually succeed, so asking for private mentoring/counselling is important. If you ask questions or discuss personal concerns publicly, there may be circumstances around you that will make the responses less considerate and professional. Asking why and what may be fine privately, but it also may also be misinterpreted as weak or disrespectful by bystanders, and that likely will get a response from your leader that is harsh- he can't allow himself to look weak when dealing with a possibly impertinent private.

If you want career, start by distinguishing yourself physically (PT score), mentally (your tasks and drills), and in marksmanship. Go to the Soldier of the Month Board. Once you redeploy, try to go Air Assault or Airborne (not hard to pass but you will have to get support to go there in the first place). Your future goals should be EIB and possibly Ranger or even Sapper.

Response by SPC Jay Moore made Aug 17 at 2022 8:56 PM

2022-08-17T20:56:10-04:00

Just remember when someone's yelling at you for anything just tell him you're all f***** up sir and it'll usually get you by promise