I'm not bitchin or complaining. Want to know how some of you that have been out for a while cope with finding purpose?

SPC Jc "Viking" — Thu, 04 Jul 2019 20:48:28 -0400

I have jumped around from job to job and felt empty.

Response by PV2 Duane Schlender made Jul 4 at 2019 9:01 PM

PV2 Duane Schlender — Thu, 04 Jul 2019 21:01:33 -0400

Don't feel bad. After leaving the service, I never gained a purpose.
It can be difficult if you do not have any kind of support.
I would say, start thinking to yourself and ask yourself what feels right and what doesn't.

Response by SGT Javier Silva made Jul 4 at 2019 9:48 PM

SGT Javier Silva — Thu, 04 Jul 2019 21:48:23 -0400

To this day, I can't seem to find a job gives me the kind of purpose the military did. I have not been able to stay at one job location longer than two (2) years (I'm headed to two in my current job). Have you tried going into public service?

Response by MSgt Steven Holt, NRP, CCEMT-P made Jul 4 at 2019 10:47 PM

MSgt Steven Holt, NRP, CCEMT-P — Thu, 04 Jul 2019 22:47:41 -0400

If I ever find somewhere I feel like I "fit in", I'll let you know....

Been retired almost 10 years. I'm on my fourth career change since returning to civilian life. I've been in EMS longer than any other job I've taken but I still feel like I no longer have a purpose in life.

Response by Sgt Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 4 at 2019 10:56 PM

Sgt Private RallyPoint Member — Thu, 04 Jul 2019 22:56:19 -0400

SPC Jc "Viking" Sit down and decide what career would make you happy. Then thoroughly research the career to find out what skills and education are needed for that field. Make plans and set goals to meet the requirements for your dream career, and then go land the job. I had a plan to go to work for the Space Program in Houston. I knew that I needed a degree, so when I was discharged, I moved to the Houston area, found a good job as an operator at a chemical plant, and started school. Five and a half years later, I had my degree, and started a 33 year career working on the Space Shuttle Program. Hard work and determination will go a long ways toward achieving your goals. Good luck.

Response by SGT Chris Stephens made Jul 5 at 2019 1:10 AM

SGT Chris Stephens — Fri, 05 Jul 2019 01:10:32 -0400

I saw in your response about being a dad and getting involved with whatever your son is doing. I'd say you found your purpose there. I got out after almost 12 years in after my youngest son was diagnosed with autism. I also became a teacher and a coach, but mostly stick to the same schedule he is on. This is my purpose. I never envisioned being the parent of a special-needs child, but I can't imagine my life without that going on. I'm fully invested in him and my oldest child and the activities he wants to do. I still miss the military and everything I got to do and experienced, but I wouldn't go back. My purpose is with my family.

Response by PO1 William "Chip" Nagel made Jul 5 at 2019 6:41 AM

PO1 William "Chip" Nagel — Fri, 05 Jul 2019 06:41:15 -0400

SPC Jc "Viking" I Like SGT Javier Silva Suggestion. Public Service. I Know My Daughter Helps with Special Needs Students at the School District She is in.

Response by SFC Casey O'Mally made Jul 5 at 2019 8:58 AM

SFC Casey O'Mally — Fri, 05 Jul 2019 08:58:35 -0400

I know what you are asking, and this answer doesn't COMPLETELY get you there, BUT..
I learned from my pappy that a job worth doing is a job worth doing right. So make whatwvwr youvare doing your purpose. I currently am a pizza delivery driver and a full time student. When I am delivering pizza, I work to be the best delivery driver in the franchise. I always try to learn more, do more, contribute more. When I am at school, I strive to be the best student in each class. I ask insightful questions to expand the lectures (as compared to "gotcha" or "stump the chump" questions), I do all of my homework, I answer essays to the fullest extent, I study for my tests, and I work to help my fellow students understand and retain as much knowledge as they can.
Does that provide the same sense of purpose as being a Soldier? Overall, Hell no. But, it absolutely DOES does on a day-by-day basis.

I struggle with depression, and one of my major triggers is purposelessness. The above approach keeps the depression at bay, for the most part. Even if your mission of the day is to relax and recover, relax and recover the best you possibly can.

Response by LCDR Joshua Gillespie made Jul 5 at 2019 9:13 AM

LCDR Joshua Gillespie — Fri, 05 Jul 2019 09:13:18 -0400

It's not always easy...but it's about perspective. There's not a day that goes by that I don't miss the service. I miss being part of something that is so universally recognized; I miss having the friends, the mission, the "calling". Yes, I even miss the stupid crap that at least made sense to me because everyone had to embrace the "suck" together. Life out here can easily seem meaningless, boring, and surreal...but when you think about it, we're free to make of it what we want. I "could" get up everyday and just exist...or I could live each day to the fullest. I "could" focus on how "useless" my job is, how "lame" the routines are...or I can look for that one thing every day that lets me be exceptional. I "could" make endless comparisons between the people I served with...and the people I'm around now; or, I can use what the Military taught me to be an influence on others and help them. I look at civilian life as the longest orders I ever received...go out and do right by what you'v learned-for the rest of your life. That's my strategy Brother.

Response by MSgt Michael Smith made Jul 5 at 2019 9:39 AM

MSgt Michael Smith — Fri, 05 Jul 2019 09:39:24 -0400

Its hard. This is where I find myself lucky. While I was in I was very careful never to let the military define my whole life. I knew that I wanted to do something after I retired. Many, many people I served with did not --they had far more pride and love for service than I did. I don't mean that in a bad way, I am very honored to have had the opportunity to have such a long and fantastic career (I did 22 years), but I always knew I was going to be a civilian one day. Since I left the service I have been very much surprised by how much I actually miss it, how much it defines who I am. I am happy in my work now, but still I miss it. It must be far worst for people who were that much more dedicated than I was.

Response by Cpl Jeff N. made Jul 5 at 2019 9:10 PM

Cpl Jeff N. — Fri, 05 Jul 2019 21:10:42 -0400

I've been out since 1985. I never really thought a lot about finding a purpose. I was a Marine, there was really nothing that was going to be anything like that in the civilian world, period. The reasons l left the Marine Corps were essentially what I flipped into my "purpose". I knew in the Marines, having a family and any sort of career path that would allow be to be home were next to impossible.

My purpose was to have a family, be there for them. Have a career that would allow me to take care of them. The job/career is not the purpose of your life. I have done very well and have been with my company or over 31 years. I did not plan it that way. My career is an important part of my life as it allows me to have the income and benefits I need to provide things but your career should not be misconstrued to be your purpose. I spend a lot of time at work and traveling the planet as part of my job. I do get satisfaction from doing the job well but I could walk away at any time and not feel as though I lost something significant. Life is all about balance. It is hard to achieve and not the same for each of us.

I fit in with friends I served with and other Marines I know and have met. We are a smaller clique. I do not fit in as well with those that have not served in the armed forces. That doesn't mean we are not friends but there is not the same connection.

The bottom line is your job/career is not the only thing (or perhaps even the primary thing) that should fulfill you. If you think a job can provide you that sort of satisfaction you may be disappointed for a very long time.

Response by CPO Keith Booth made Jul 7 at 2019 10:53 PM

CPO Keith Booth — Sun, 07 Jul 2019 22:53:04 -0400

I was to be drafted in December 1965
I enlisted into the USAF and was a C-130 a fat mechanic
Seance then I have NEVER felt comfortable Around others
More jobs than I can count
Re-enlisted into the USCG
Retired in 1990
Only 1 job I healed for more than 2 years
In my life time
I am out of place with the rest of the world

This January I left home (wife, daughter, son in law, 2 grandchildren
I just wanted to be left alone
I went to Nevada to be a desert rat but outside interference forces me back

IF Anyone finds any where to get better please let me know