I’m trying to be a good NCO, but I feel my intentions are misconstrued by my Soldiers. Am I the problem? If so, how can I fix myself?

SGT Private RallyPoint Member — Thu, 23 Jul 2020 23:42:53 -0400

Apologies for this being long, but I am desperately seeking wisdom because there is none to be found anywhere at my unit.

I have been in a Platoon Sergeant position for two weeks because nobody else is available and I am struggling bad. It has made me very doubtful of my ability overall because I feel my platoon hates me or at the least has no faith in me as their acting PSG that I do care. I understand that this seems like mind-reading, bitching, or just whining, but I really could use advice and none of my peers or those in my chain of command are around due to them coming off deployment. And the ones that are have way too much on their plate due to being on Rear D to sit and talk with me.

I always try my best to practice what I preach, but I have difficulty communicating with others. I sometimes stutter or what I mean to say comes out wrong or at least I have to repeat myself to clarify what I mean. Even though I’ve made tremendous strides in overcoming personal social anxiety, I still have trouble with communication and often have to clarify myself or ask if what I said was understood.

If standards are set, I myself follow them, and I ask my soldiers to follow them too. I try to minimize BS that comes our way and if they can be offset by some kind of reward for them, I would do so. I like to imagine that I am fair and reasonable, but I expect others to do the right thing.

But being in this position, which was a crapshoot to begin with because the previous acting PSG left a huge pile of crap for me to deal with, (soldier going through AR-15, Soldier’s personal issues that leak over into work, with little to no info, it has been one hardship after another that I take to bed with me thinking about what I had done wrong and what I should have done better.

But I at least tried my best to salvage what I could. It doesn’t help that discipline is shitty because the previous PSG couldn’t care less, which left the joes to do basically whatever, and I feel I am looked at as an unreasonable hardass because I enforce standards despite me doing all in my power to do the right thing Ntoo. I despise hypocrisy, so I practice what I preach and don’t let standards slip for myself. If anything, I am harder on myself to avoid slipping into the trap of throwing up my hands and giving into hopelessness.

What makes this worse is that NOBODY likes the unit we are in and the atmosphere of negativity feels like a palpable thing, like smoke. The joes often talk about how much they hate our unit, but do nothing to improve it, and the NCOs as well as officers who do care are beaten down by all the negativity from their peers and leaders.

Bottom line, I enforce standards like I am supposed to, but I worry I come across like a zealot or hardass because I don’t accept shitty performances despite me holding myself to that same standard. I always try to talk to them to make sure they are well and getting their needs taken care of. I have trouble communicating and getting my point across when I am stressed, which makes it hard for me to effectively coach and mentor others. So when I enforce standards and discipline amongst my platoon, how can I do so without coming across as an unreasonable hardass? How can I communicate more effectively? I sincerely care about my soldiers, but I don’t know what I am doing wrong.

Apologies again for this being so long, but I have no other senior NCOs or peers to turn to for advice.

Response by CSM Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 23 at 2020 11:49 PM

CSM Private RallyPoint Member — Thu, 23 Jul 2020 23:49:59 -0400

Think, plan, practice, speak. Be as clear concise and to the point as you can be. Actions speak louder than words. Care for your Soldiers, show empathy, counsel them and spend time one on one with each of them. Leadership is not easy, but it’s simple. Lead and treat others the way you’d like to be led. Sometimes you have to lead up. Don’t let a bad CoC bring you down, lead in spite of them.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 24 at 2020 12:08 AM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 24 Jul 2020 00:08:59 -0400

You will never be your Soldiers friend so don’t expect them to like you. But treat them with respect, and demand they treat everyone else with respect. They in turn will respect you and that’s worth more than being liked.

The Soldiers below you will resist you and hate you to some degree when the unit morale is low. That’s not a reflection on you; you are the authority so you represent the unit they hate. But as long as they gripe to you and bring their problems to you, they respect and trust you enough to hope you can help them. As Colin Powell famously stated, when Soldiers stop bringing their problems to you, you’re no longer leading them.

Most places that aren’t some elite or well funded unit have morale issues to some degree for some period of time. You’re put in a place where you’re struggling to support the units mission and trying to protect the welfare of your Soldiers. Often the two seem diametrically opposed or mutually exclusive. Your unit needs people for a detail but your guy needs to go to these appointments. Sometimes you have to push back, sometimes you have to roll with it and spread out the BS. It’s easier to do that when your people feel like a team. People feel like a team when there’s culture. An organization develops culture when it’s members help each other, they destroy culture when members refuse to help each other. Simon Sinek writes, blogs, and teaches a lot about research on culture within teams. It is the glue that holds the teams together and the reason people either love or hate coming to work.

Last, I’ll leave you with a piece of parting wisdom that my 1SG told me when I first became a Senior Medic - When you become a leader, the Army gives you all these balls to juggle, and they’ll keep adding balls as long as you can juggle them. Some of these balls are glass and some are rubber. You just have to figure out which ones you can drop and recover and which ones you can’t.

Response by CW2 Stephen Pate made Jul 24 at 2020 12:13 AM

CW2 Stephen Pate — Fri, 24 Jul 2020 00:13:47 -0400

1. Praise in public, criticize in private.
2. Brief standards, tasks, etc and ask random Soldiers (I usually pick the ones who weren't listening) to back brief what you just put out.
3. Empower your subordinate leaders.
Your squad/team leaders should be maintaining the standards you set. If not, hold them accountable. If you are running around trying to manage everything and correct your Soldiers deficiencies, then your squad leaders should be fired via relief for cause, but in order to do that you have to set the standard through:
4. Counselings. WRITE THEM! Initial counselings that set the expectations immediately are an absolute necessity.
5. Make lists and check things off when they are done. At the end of the day when having a squad leader meeting, hold mini AARs. Cover what was accomplished, was didn't get done (and what will be done because of that failure, if anything) and what will roll over into the next day, and what they'll be responsible for tomorrow for the rest of the week, for the rest of the month, and so on, covering as far out as you know.
6. When assigning tasks set deadlines and hold those tasked accountable. Also, don't over task your people, and always add a bit of fudge time in your planning. If it's Monday and you need something accomplished by Friday, you give them until Wednesday to do it.

That's all I have for now, but if you found any of this useful and have questions or comments please hit me up here or at my email @ [login to see] . Good luck to you. I think you've got this.

Response by SSG Roger Ayscue made Jul 24 at 2020 12:30 AM

SSG Roger Ayscue — Fri, 24 Jul 2020 00:30:11 -0400

Read what SFC Private RallyPoint Member Jason Boyd wrote again...
For Good or Bad you are in the hot seat. Earn your men's respect by leading from the front, exceeding the standard you demand from them and know your troopers. You will have to address each Soldier's problems, one at a time and give it your all to fix it. Fixes may ar may not make the Soldier happy but Do fix it correctly.
Stay Strong and believe in yourself. You are a Non-commissioned Officer, no one is more professional than you. If you do your best for them, it may take a bit but they will see it and appreciate it and Respect the man who is giving them 100%

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 24 at 2020 12:41 AM

CPT Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 24 Jul 2020 00:41:50 -0400

Do you have a PL? Where is your officer that should be in charge of the platoon in relation of discipline? The first thing you should have done was give each subordinate leader a counseling explaining their duties in relation to their MOS and leadership role. They may not even know the standard. One thing I do is that I make sure to show every Soldier what is expected of them using their Individual Critical Task List. I have attached the link for SL1 for 68W. If Soldiers are left idle then they will find problems for you to solve. If they focus on a task they will work to complete what is in front of them. If you give them a chance to train using doctrine and show them that they are required to know their MOS by being able to perform these tasks then they may want to work towards them. If they fail to maintain the standards set by they Army then you can counsel them for their failure to maintain their proficiency. Enough of those you can separate them for patterns of misconduct. This should only be reserved for those that fail to train or refuse to maintain their proficiency. If they don't want to do their job that's fine. Then they can find a job as a civilian.

https://rdl.train.army.mil/catalog/go/100.ATSC/11A408F1-E864-403C-82FA-45A40F7E498F [login to see] 483

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Response by GySgt Gary Cordeiro made Jul 24 at 2020 12:49 AM

GySgt Gary Cordeiro — Fri, 24 Jul 2020 00:49:39 -0400

You mentioned a stuttering problem, judging from your last name, probably bilingual. Use your culture. Show the beauty of it. Don’t be someone you cannot be. You don’t have a platoon, you have a family of well trained health professionals.

Response by TSgt Carl Johnson made Jul 24 at 2020 1:03 AM

TSgt Carl Johnson — Fri, 24 Jul 2020 01:03:08 -0400

SGT Hernandez, you have received some excellent advice from your fellow soldiers. When I was a new NCO, I felt the same way, sometimes. I made some mistakes, fortunately none that caused long-term damage. The only thing that I would add is to let your squad leaders know that you will back them up (when they are right), and make sure that you have your platoon's best interest as a high proirity. That includes ensuring that they understand that being squared away will make their life easier. Best of luck to you. Sounds like you are on the right track.

Response by SGM Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 24 at 2020 3:50 AM

SGM Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 24 Jul 2020 03:50:29 -0400

Here's my advice to you as a PSG:

You can accomplish a nearly unlimited number of tasks, while maintaining stability and flexibility for your troops if you can manage the battle rhythm. This means that you basically line up your platoon's normal PT, work, and duty schedule by month. I understand that there are often tasks assigned that can interfere with your platoon plans, but being able to project activities on normal days goes a long way toward getting Soldiers to follow you. Many times morale problems can be attributed to unpredictable schedules that result in burnout. Basically, if you are routinely working late, something is wrong with your planning and your people will get restless.

Start with the basics:
1. Create a monthly calendar. Include all steady-state known factors on the basic format. Example: Maintenance Mondays, PT, SGT's Time, PLT AO cleanup etc.
2. Build on your calendar to add things that should be accomplished monthly. Example: Counseling sessions, Follow up counselings, layout and equipment maintenance, Mandatory training time.
3. Ensure your calendar is nested with the company training schedule.
4. Communicate with your 1SG to ensure he/she is aware of your battle rhythm plans.
5. Make sure your LT is on board so he/she can give you top cover with the commander.
6. Communicate the plans with your platoon so they know how their normal monthly schedule will operate.
7. Push back against taskings that (a) are inside the 6-week window; (b) are not issued with an OPORD (get LT involved on this one); or (c) seriously disrupt your ability to maintain the battle rhythm.
8. Continually reassess the upcoming training schedule and its potential to alter your plans; make adjustments as necessary. This should be done weekly, late Wed-early Fri.
9. Stay positive. Negativity feeds on itself. Always seek the most positive solution rather than the least negative one.

If you have already planned most of your PLT events for the month, small siphons from company taskers shouldn't disrupt your ability to complete your daily battle rhythm tasks prior to COB. Obviously, major events like FTX/NTC/Deployment or company collective training events will have an effect on your internal PLT tasks. But if you are truly diligent in staying up with your BR, your maintenance stats will be 95%. Your HR stats will be 95%. Your counseling requirements will be 95%. Mandatory training--also 95%. Your people will go home on time, and they will respect that you care about their time and that they have predictability for their personal lives.

The key to success as a PSG is staying out in front. When you become reactionary, it is a very stressful and difficult job. Best of luck, SGT!

Response by 1SG Alan Boggs made Jul 24 at 2020 8:36 AM

1SG Alan Boggs — Fri, 24 Jul 2020 08:36:59 -0400

Sgt Hernandez, How do you eat an elephant? You eat it one bite at a time.
I dont know how many soldiers are in your platoon but I will assume if an E5 is in the position of acting PSG that its not a full platoon. I would hope you have at least a couple other NCOs or senior E4s. You need those soldiers buy in, take your team leaders aside and discuss the need for leader direction for their teams. Set some attainable benchmarks that fit your platoons overall mission. Leaders provide purpose and direction then influence others to follow them.
Soldiers are like a chain, you can get alot done by pulling on a chain but have you ever tried pushing something with a chain? It just gets all bunched up and nothing gets done. Get out front and pull your team where you want it to go.

Response by COL Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 24 at 2020 8:40 AM

COL Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 24 Jul 2020 08:40:08 -0400

Lots of good advice from some Sr NCOs. The only thing I would add is that you cannot do it alone. You need to form a coalition to change the culture. Bring in your squad leaders and come up with a plan on how to change the unit culture for the better so everyone is “more happy” to be in the unit. Give them buy-in so that it’s their plan too and together tackle the task. Good luck- sounds like you’re headed in the right direction.
Don’t worry about not being liked- I had a similar issue when I was an NCO. It’s going to happen when you are pushing soldiers to be their best.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 24 at 2020 9:21 AM

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 24 Jul 2020 09:21:38 -0400

Relax, don't try so hard. You were promoted because you showed the skills and ability to lead. Take care of them, train them, counsel them. Be an example to emulate. doesn't matter the size of the element you are leading from team to platoon, its the same thing, "follow me" Give yourself some time to grow into the role. Be patient with yourself and grab a 22-100 and 22-101. Best of Luck Sergeant.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 24 at 2020 9:25 AM

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 24 Jul 2020 09:25:29 -0400

Relax. two weeks is hardly enough time to asses where you are. Grab a 22-100 and 22-101. You have the skills and the ability to lead. you will get more comfortable as time goes on. Be an example for them to emulate, Take care, train, counsel your troops. Be the standard. Let them know. a good leader should not have to yell to get their point across. Best of Luck. Be, Know, Do"

Response by CMSgt James Nolan made Jul 24 at 2020 11:12 AM

CMSgt James Nolan — Fri, 24 Jul 2020 11:12:55 -0400

Welcome to leadership.
Nobody is perfect and those who think they are, aren’t.
You know what is right, by demonstrating that and living that, it will rub off to some degree.
By showing interest and compassion for “your troops” it will become evident that your heart is in right place.
Work the issues one at a time and be fair to the troops, by not showing favoritism.
You have a lot on your plate. Communication is a key part of leadership, making friends isn’t. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t care what they think. You want their respect, that comes from you being competent. Unfortunately, some troops make themselves unsalvageable. That doesn’t mean that you give up on them, you show them they are worth fighting for and give them the opportunity, they have to take it.
Because you are so busy and have so many issues to deal with, recommend keeping a constant to-do list so you don’t forget things.

Response by LtCol Robert Quinter made Jul 24 at 2020 11:13 AM

LtCol Robert Quinter — Fri, 24 Jul 2020 11:13:30 -0400

Great advice already given, but here is one possibility. You state nobody wants to be in your unit because "it sucks". Pick out one trait or condition that most members deplore. Explain to the squad leaders you'd like to make an all hands effort to correct it; ask them for their thoughts and give them a day or so to get their squads thoughts through their team leaders. Success comes when the entire unit buys into the effort. May not work, but use the philosophy and give it a shot.

Response by SFC Casey O'Mally made Jul 24 at 2020 12:06 PM

SFC Casey O'Mally — Fri, 24 Jul 2020 12:06:59 -0400

I, too was once an acting PSG as a SGT. My problem was different - a PL who refused to listen to anything I had to say (and always approached things bass ackwards). But it was the same in that I was in an impossible position, trying to accomplish (assinine) missions while trying to take care of Soldiers. I, too, felt I was not up to the task.

SFC Private RallyPoint Member Gave you far better advice than I can. All I can add is that at the end of every day, you have to ask yourself if you did your best for your Soldiers and for your Army. If the answer is yes, hold your head high and sleep calm. And go back out tomorrow and do your best again - which is hopefully just a little bit better than the day before.
Don't ask yourself if you could have done more. You can ALWAYS do more - that is a never win question. It is OK to reflect on mistakes in order to figure out how to improve. But reflecting is not dwelling. Reflect, improve, and move on. When you keep revisiting it, you prevent yourself from ever improving and moving to the NEXT mistake or weakness that you can work on. And there is always something to work on. Even CSA, SMA, CJCS, etc. make mistakes and have weaknesses. These are only something to be ashamed of if you don't work on improving.

Response by SSgt Christophe Murphy made Jul 24 at 2020 1:03 PM

SSgt Christophe Murphy — Fri, 24 Jul 2020 13:03:29 -0400

First off you are in a thankless job. And with it being only two weeks the Troops are still weighing what they think of you most likely. The best thing you can do is set a daily/weekly schedule that works and engage your squad leaders. Stay engaged with your troops while you accomplish the daily/weekly tasks and things will sort themself out. With dealing with admin issues you may need to work with your Squad Leaders to ensure things are getting done while you are off dealing with the Command and other entities.

The biggest thing that will help you is building a counterpart relationship with your immediate senior and junior. Your PL and squad leaders all have the same mission and are in it together

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 24 at 2020 4:57 PM

SGT Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 24 Jul 2020 16:57:58 -0400

So to all of you, who answered this, from the bottom of my heart I sincerely thank you.

To answer the most frequent questions that popped up, I do not have a PL here. There is only myself and one other E-5 at the moment. The SPC we have are almost out the door, and the one who isn’t is the Ar15 problem child. The rest are mostly brand new joes and ones who I am meeting for the first time since coming back from deployment.

But even so, I again thank all of you for the amalgam of wisdom. At the heart of it all, I just want to do what’s right by others, which I feel will help me by proxy. I came into this unit at a very strange time, so I can safely say I had met my PSG in person less than 20 times since last year July due to pre, current, and post- deployment. So I’ve been working almost completely separated and alone from my platoon while deployed save through messages and the rare individual meetings.

Nevertheless, I will take all of this wisdom, guidance, and advice to heart and continuously strive to be the best I can.
Thank you all for giving me my hope back.

Response by SSG Shyronda Boose made Jul 24 at 2020 5:48 PM

SSG Shyronda Boose — Fri, 24 Jul 2020 17:48:39 -0400

Don't doubt yourself. The kids today come from a different mindset, set your boundaries, be fair and when the rules are broken put in ink, end of discussion. They will then know that you mean what you say and say what you mean!!! For God sake do no FRATINIZATION!!!

Response by PO3 Scott Winningham made Jul 24 at 2020 7:31 PM

PO3 Scott Winningham — Fri, 24 Jul 2020 19:31:47 -0400

Just try not to be to bossie and let them do there job at there best yet you cannot be to friendly you are the man good luck hope this helps I was in the same buckit

Response by SGM Erik Marquez made Jul 25 at 2020 11:01 AM

SGM Erik Marquez — Sat, 25 Jul 2020 11:01:17 -0400

"SGT Private RallyPoint Member "
"I have been in a Platoon Sergeant position for two weeks because nobody else is available "

Well lets start off with you have been set up for failure by the unit leadership.
That said, under the right leadership, one that will mento and lead, not yell at your failures but show how to not make them again, one that will keep close tabs on your performance and daily activities, stepping in and giving you ideas, hints or outright saying STOP...PUT THEM ON A BREAK...Then come talk to me in the office so we don't get folks hurt.... THat kind of leadership that knows your going to make mistakes everyday just for lack of the significant training, experiences and years of general learning a PSG should have before being put in the position. That kind of leadership putting a junior SM in a senior leadership position can be a good thing.....
As a SSG p I had more PL time as an Anti Tank platoon leader in an Airborne unit than any other officer at the time.. I was given no slack in performing the duties of a PL, but it was acknowledged upfront Id make mistakes.
So "Bottom line, I enforce standards like I am supposed to, but I worry I come across like a zealot or hardass because I don’t accept shitty performances despite me holding myself to that same standard. I always try to talk to them to make sure they are well and getting their needs taken care of. I have trouble communicating and getting my point across when I am stressed, which makes it hard for me to effectively coach and mentor others. So when I enforce standards and discipline amongst my platoon, how can I do so without coming across as an unreasonable hardass? "

Need specifics..
What standards are you personally adhering to and enforcing that are not being taken seriously by the platoon?
PV2's not standing at parade rest for a SP4? or Weapons not cleaned before turn in after training?
Hair cut ..just touching the ear or no inserts or plates in vest during live fire training?

2nd,do you know, have you asked WHY? "Sgt, WHY is your hair touching your ears, whats up with no hair cut in weeks?" It could be as basic as...."Man screw that shot the fat ass Major in battalion don't cut his hair every week" And you deal with that SM and his response.... Or it could be"PSG, I know, my bad....but im strapped for cash..we barely have enough for gas to get me to work and diapers and formula....$10 on a hair cut means I run out of gas, or baby don't get fed..." and you deal with that issue.

Point is, most times the Why is needed info to address the issue correctly

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 25 at 2020 1:16 PM

CPT Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 25 Jul 2020 13:16:11 -0400

I've had a similar problem with one of my newly appointed Platoon SGT's while in Company Command. The NCO wasn't ready for the position, but there was no one else.

The point is, I read through your entire post, and I have no more visibility on the situation than I did my scenario. So I don't know what it is you are not telling us, or you are not seeing yourself.

In my situation, I had other NCO's complain about the Platoon SGT, and then it started going down the path of her being singled out as a female, then of course I'm now worrying about EO/SHARP. THANKFULLY!!!!!!!!!!! my 1SG at the time had similar complaints about her, and the 1SG was FEMALE as well. EO crisis averted.

What is came down to is respect to your subordinates (mentioned by SFC). As Company Commander, I never got to see her ugly side. She towed that line.

So it wasn't about what she was expecting of her soldiers, it was about how she was communicating it to them. At some point the aggressive NCO posture has run its course after basic training.

A solution to my problem landed in my lap. An new SFC was assigned to my unit, was put in the position and everyone saved face.

But what I would have recommended based on my observation that I never see her ugly side is simply remember that your commander at any time could be in ear shot of your actions and conduct yourself accordingly.

There's being a HARD ASS, but then you don't want to be a push over obviously, but then again the ideal is to be professional.

I like professional. I don't like being a hard ass, and when professional doesn't work because some need a hard ass I simply run them into the ground administratively. I don't execute actions in spite to make their lives worse. I execute actions administratively to make my life easier.

Response by SSG Eric Blue made Jul 25 at 2020 3:53 PM

SSG Eric Blue — Sat, 25 Jul 2020 15:53:21 -0400

Don't stop being a good leader and caring about your soldiers, SGT Keith H. because our military needs that right now! Corporals to Command Sergeants Major nowadays have either forgotten or ignored the Creed Of The Non-Commissioned Officer, so your compassion for troops and your desire to do what's right is sorely needed and absolutely necessary!

Response by SMSgt Ed W. made Jul 26 at 2020 11:25 AM

SMSgt Ed W. — Sun, 26 Jul 2020 11:25:22 -0400

I have just finished reading over the responses. I never cease to be amazed at how leaders are willing to share the lessons learned. Amazed also that they aren't afraid to admit they screwed up and that they aren't perfect. Somehow I wish this forum would have been available in the '60s. Then I realized we did have something similar. We had peers in the unit that were examples and willing to give us advice when we needed it. I have witnessed that sharing here and found that some peers are still around, even after retirement, to share lessons learned. The tools have changed, but the missions the same.

Response by SSG Dale London made Jul 26 at 2020 7:39 PM

SSG Dale London — Sun, 26 Jul 2020 19:39:57 -0400

I think I know where your problem is coming from: you want to be liked. It is natural enough. We all want to be liked. But being liked by your subordinates MUST be secondary to being respected by them. Oftentimes, being a good platoon sergeant requires that you give the impression that the opinions of your soldiers are immaterial to the platoon's mission -- because they are.
Your problems in communication can be overcome if you stick to the basics and remove emotion from the mix. It won't be easy. Lean on your squad leaders and delegate a bit but not too much.
Okay, so you're in a tough spot. You've been thrown in over your head and you have to sink or swim. In order to overcome this you are going to have to give up a couple of things: the first being your desire to be liked by the platoon. You need to be respected but being liked in your position will positively rob you of your ability to lead; and second being the delusion that you can still be their friend while you exercise authority over them. If you try to be their buddy and their PSG at the same time, you will lose their respect and their obedience. In short, you will fail them. They don't need a buddy they need a boss.
In your mind you need to boil this down to a few salient facts:
1) there is a mission to accomplish (there is ALWAYS a mission) and it is your job to ensure its successful completion. It doesn't matter if the mission is an assault on an enemy position or a police call around the company area. There is a mission. You need to get your soldiers' willing participation -- notice I did not say they had to like it.
2) your most important asset is the men you lead. Without them you cannot complete the task. A big part of your job is to help them, resolve their issues either by being helpful or resolute. If their situation cannot be helped at your level pass it up the chain and make it the 1SG's problem. If you can resolve it at your level do the best you can with the time you have, bearing in mind that you have more than one soldier to take care of.
3) You have to do more than exemplify the standards you expect your soldiers to meet. You have to enforce the standards meticulously. Use on-the-spot corrections when appropriate and do not forget that while you may only have three stripes, you are still a Non-commissioned Officer, empowered to issue lawful orders and entitled to respect.
One piece of advice I received at PLDC (as BLC used to be called): never issue an order that you are not prepared to stand behind and defend all the way up the chain. Be as fair as you can be without showing favoritism and be unbending with regard to the standards set by the CO.
My penultimate piece of advice is probably the most important: get the advice and support of the 1SG and the other leaders in your unit.
Okay, with all that said, one last thing: try not to be an asshole. Overcompensating can be as destructive as being too lenient. You have to find that balance.
Good luck, Sergeant. Kick ass and take names.

Response by TSgt David Holman made Jul 26 at 2020 9:26 PM

TSgt David Holman — Sun, 26 Jul 2020 21:26:11 -0400

Honestly, I don't think you should be doubting yourself. Reading your post, it comes across as though you are seeking mentorship from those who are above or have come before you. That shows humility, which is a strong trait in leaders that is often overlooked. Don't focus on whether or not subordinates like you. If they do, great, if they don't, great, they still have to listen, and that is the key. If you show a mutual respect, and enforce the standard, they will respect you. If you try to gain their "friendship", then you are fighting a losing battle. Focus on the things you can change, and be consistent.

Response by SFC Ariel Pagan made Jul 28 at 2020 2:16 PM

SFC Ariel Pagan — Tue, 28 Jul 2020 14:16:16 -0400

In 1995, I was the Platoon Sgt for 1-15th Infantry Scout Platoon and the first thing I encounter was that they were no discipline at all in the ranks.

So, for the first two weeks I dedicated myself to observe how the platoon was conducting themselves.

After, that I took all my squad leaders and Section Sgt and give them a good ass chewing for allowing the soldiers not doing what they supposed to do.

Then I proceed with doing counseling statement to all my Section SGT and Squad Leader explaining them the importance that comes with the rank and show them their weakness and strengths and how to improve.

In another word you must hold the NCO’s accountable for their soldier behavior. Also, you are not there to be their friends.

Is going to take time but eventually they will come around.

It took me about a month but they finally came around and became a good PLT.

Remember, hold your NCO’s accountable and everything will fall in place.

Wishing you the best

Scouts Out

Response by MSgt Allen Chandler made Oct 17 at 2020 7:56 PM

MSgt Allen Chandler — Sat, 17 Oct 2020 19:56:58 -0400

Leader ship is a skill set. It comes naturally to some, Others have to work And learning how to be a leader. There are a lot of books in training programs, And there should be some good people around you They have some experience in might help you. Remember the basic Rules of leader ship are 1) Fair, 2) Just 3) Keep the mission in mind, And what your people are capable of. Some people might put them in a different order, But they're all three Important.