"I never wanted to talk about what happened to me"

PO3 Michael E. Corso — Tue, 14 Dec 2021 08:58:46 -0500

Michael Corso joined the Navy just after high school. He grew up in an unstable home, a survivor of child abuse. In the Navy, Michael saw an opportunity to start anew. He would travel the world and maybe find a new kind of family.

A self-described loner when he joined, Michael found the structure and routine of the military grounding. He gained confidence in himself through his job as a Personnelman 3rd class, and also socially. “The Navy really helped me come out of myself and to try to make friends and acquaintances.”

One of those friendships went terribly wrong. “I think somehow he could tell something about me that I wouldn't do anything about it. He was right.” That “friend” sexually assaulted Michael, and that event changed Michael forever.

Today, VA statistics show that 1 in 50 enlisted men and 1 in 3 women report experiencing MST (military sexual trauma). The effects can be devastating. Michael remembers, “I was scared. He was still on the ship… I lost all that feeling of safety when that happened to me. I lost a family.”

Michael didn’t report. “There's that mindset that we should be able to handle things on our own. But this was something I couldn't handle, and I didn't feel like there was anybody I could talk to.” His self-confidence was profoundly shaken in the years that followed. “I wasn't able to have any close, intimate relationships for many, many years…I pretty much stayed alone and didn't understand who I was or who I was supposed to be.”

Michael stumbled into a marriage and started a family. He struggled with the continued impact of the MST on his sense of security and his ability to connect with others. The tipping point came when a coworker told him to get some help. Michael turned to the VA where he was diagnosed with PTSD and entered into an MST program. “Hearing that other men tell their story helped me understand that it was okay for me to start talking about it and get the right treatment.”

The marriage didn’t survive, but today Michael is close with his children. “They know about everything that's happened and they still love me. That's a good feeling.” And his life has taken another positive turn. “I'm now happily married to this amazing person and the person happens to be a guy. It doesn't mean that everybody that goes through MST is gay, but for me, through all the counseling and everything, it helped me see that maybe I needed to look at that part of my life. It was a good look and a good experience.”

Sharing his story has helped Michael become more comfortable with himself and with others. Today, he’s a Peer Specialist at the VA. “I have no problem telling my story. I know I'm helping someone else, but I also realize how far I’ve come.”

Visit AboutFace to learn about MST and PTSD from Veterans who have been there: https://rly.pt/3sklf4D

Military Sexual Trauma | AboutFace

The National Center for Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) aims to advance the clinical care and social welfare of U.S. Veterans through research, education and training on PTSD and stress-related

Response by PFC David Foster made Dec 14 at 2021 10:43 AM

PFC David Foster — Tue, 14 Dec 2021 10:43:10 -0500

You never know what a person may have gone through.

Response by SPC Lyle Montgomery made Dec 14 at 2021 3:37 PM

SPC Lyle Montgomery — Tue, 14 Dec 2021 15:37:10 -0500

It took a lot of guts to write that article. God bless.

Response by LTC David Brown made Dec 14 at 2021 8:03 PM

LTC David Brown — Tue, 14 Dec 2021 20:03:12 -0500

Thank you for sharing, these type of things can effect people for their whol remaining life.

Response by 1SG Zelda Davis made Dec 15 at 2021 1:41 PM

1SG Zelda Davis — Wed, 15 Dec 2021 13:41:34 -0500

Hello Michael and thank you for sharing your story. Thanks for contacting the VA and use the resources in place that helped you turn things around for yourself and your family! Your story will help others who have experienced MST to get the help they need too.

Response by MAJ Ken Landgren made Dec 15 at 2021 5:49 PM

MAJ Ken Landgren — Wed, 15 Dec 2021 17:49:03 -0500

Excellent post.

Response by SSG Rafael R. Rodriguez Sr. made Dec 17 at 2021 10:18 AM

SSG Rafael R. Rodriguez Sr. — Fri, 17 Dec 2021 10:18:44 -0500

Thank you for sharing your story with all of us. Must of been very difficult. I'm glad that you are getting better, happily married, and close to your children. And again, Thank you for helping our folks with MST and PTSD in the V.A. Amen to you!

Response by MAJ Ken Landgren made Dec 19 at 2021 12:43 PM

MAJ Ken Landgren — Sun, 19 Dec 2021 12:43:06 -0500

I am sorry.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Dec 22 at 2021 6:47 AM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 22 Dec 2021 06:47:54 -0500

Thank you for sharing a life story that everyone needs to hear, and understand.

Response by SP5 Dennis Loberger made Dec 23 at 2021 9:41 PM

SP5 Dennis Loberger — Thu, 23 Dec 2021 21:41:49 -0500

Thanks for sharing your story. You have helped yourself and others at the VA through this process and also provided valuable insight for your family as well

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Dec 24 at 2021 1:40 AM

SGT Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 24 Dec 2021 01:40:30 -0500

Please post comment and share the hell out of this!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rLPaBqEQML8&t=57s

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Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Dec 26 at 2021 8:09 PM

SGT Private RallyPoint Member — Sun, 26 Dec 2021 20:09:31 -0500

There is help out there!

Response by SSG Eric Blue made Dec 30 at 2021 2:27 PM

SSG Eric Blue — Thu, 30 Dec 2021 14:27:34 -0500

I understand. That's part of why I actively sought the duty positions of SHARP Rep, Sexual Assault Response Coordinator, and Unit Victim Advocate. I KNEW there were people suffering in silence and I wanted them to know that they weren't alone. I fought hard for their mental health, piece of mind, and justice. Especially when the victims' chains of command & NCO support channels were being buttholes about stuff.

Response by CPO Salvador Gonzalez made Dec 30 at 2021 6:41 PM

CPO Salvador Gonzalez — Thu, 30 Dec 2021 18:41:25 -0500

I am sorry that happened to you. Glad you found your way out of the darkness.

Response by PO1 Sam Deel made Jan 25 at 2022 1:41 AM

PO1 Sam Deel — Tue, 25 Jan 2022 01:41:41 -0500

Shipmate, thank you for sharing such a tough story to tell. Male or female, it is just inexcusable for someone to do that to another human being.

Response by SPC Leland Keller made Feb 7 at 2022 2:36 AM

SPC Leland Keller — Mon, 07 Feb 2022 02:36:46 -0500

Been there and had to deal with that all of my time in service from NCO to E-3 sexual harassing me from basic till I got out with no relief and due to I live in the barracks NCO harassed me 24/7. It even continue when I transfer posts because some of my fellow soldiers came too, and by the fall of 1991 I was ready to commit suicide because I couldn't escape the madness. However, my unit came down with special duty for the post library which I didn't bother putting my name in for, but my squad leader made me and I got it out of the entire company of 150 men. When I arrived the Ladies who worked there were kind, and help listen to me and get my head back to a normal place and out of a dark place where suicide was not a option any more. While I was still being harassed then in the new year of 1992 soldiers with 3 or more years could get out early so I filed my paperwork on the last day because our unit had gone cherry (experienced soldiers had left the service or transfer to a new duty station and was replace by recruits from AIT/basic training and my platoon sergeant left and was replaced by guess it yes a drill sergeant still hyped-up from training. He treated me an E-4 like I was an E-1 even though I was special duty which he didn't like which help me seal the deal on leaving early. I was to get out in July but got out in February just in time for my birthday and used up all my terminal leave which ended around March 1st. This platoon sergeant of mine made me go to the range in January in Alaska to qualify with my M-16A2 which I did, however karma is a B____ because when it around 0 degree there are special operation you do when firing your weapon because of the metal charging handle. The lower forty eight says to put your nose on it when firing it which is good a dandy when the weather is above 32 degree it's another when its below. It called frost bite which he had on the end of his nose a nice big red circle and he bolo his qualification range meaning he flunk/ failed to make the minimum hits on the targets to get a badge to which he didn't look at me but I looked at him because I was soon gone from the ate up unit. I had serviced Three years eight month and twelve days of active duty and the rest was IRR out of an eight year contract as a army combat heavy engineer. I miss the toys but not politics nor the back stabbing which was common in my day.