Is it normal to have moments of doubt during the final steps to joining?

2018-08-22T18:42:19-04:00

I'm getting ready to swear in but I'm getting these moments of questioning myself, whether or not I really want to do this. But it's hard to decide considering when I wasn't planning on joining, I fell into a dark place, I felt lost cause all I wanted to do was the military. Now though, I'm asking myself if I REALLY want to do it. Is this normal?

Response by SPC Margaret Higgins made Aug 22 at 2018 6:45 PM

2018-08-22T18:45:36-04:00

In one word: Yes, Cole. You're doing great. Try not to doubt yourself. Serving in the U.S. military is the best thing that I ever did for myself.

Response by MAJ Javier Rivera made Aug 22 at 2018 6:55 PM

2018-08-22T18:55:32-04:00

Don’t doubt yourself. When I joined I planned for only 3 years... retiring 27 years later!

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 22 at 2018 7:05 PM

2018-08-22T19:05:47-04:00

Fear of the unknown is natural. You are doing something completely outside of your experience and comfort zone. Just know that the pride and sense of accomplishment you will experience when you take that plunge will make everything worth it.

Response by SGT Joseph Gunderson made Aug 22 at 2018 7:10 PM

2018-08-22T19:10:45-04:00

Meh, maybe. I was always dead set on enlisting. I wouldn't worry about a little bit of pre-enlistment jitters though.

Response by CSM Darieus ZaGara made Aug 22 at 2018 7:46 PM

2018-08-22T19:46:33-04:00

This is a major step in your life, like moving out of your parents, getting married, deciding to have children, etc. it is normal to be nervous, unsure and the like. If this is what you wanted and it is coming close it is likely just nerves. But, only you can make that decision. I was pretty much scared when I went to boot. And then when I fell in with 40 of my closest friends it all went away.

Response by TSgt David Holman made Aug 22 at 2018 7:56 PM

2018-08-22T19:56:43-04:00

Not only is it normal, but I would question anyone who doesn't have those feelings. As has been mentioned, the fear of the unknown is normal, and having these feelings means that you grasp the gravity of the commitment you are about to make. Believe it or not, there were days through out my 20 year career where I woke up and questioned whether or not I had made the right choice. Those were the days where I would dig a little deeper, and realize the commitment I made not only to my country, but to my fellow airmen. Keep pushing, and look for the support. The questions only make you stronger.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 22 at 2018 8:16 PM

2018-08-22T20:16:35-04:00

I’ve been doing this for 12 years and I still find myself second guessing some decisions.

Response by LT Brad McInnis made Aug 22 at 2018 8:22 PM

2018-08-22T20:22:44-04:00

I had doubts on the plane ride.. once you start most of that goes away!

Response by Sgt Roy Hale made Aug 22 at 2018 8:24 PM

2018-08-22T20:24:17-04:00

Fear of the unknown is perfectly normal, your life is about to change, drastically would be an understatement. You will have regrets at first, but once you fall into the routine of things, you will have more motivation and sense of accomplishment than most civilians have in their lifetimes. When you earn the title and you will earn it in blood sweat and tears, the title of United States Marine stays with you for life. A bit of advice for Recruit training, Keep your mouth shut unless spoken too, do what you are told immediately, never let your Platoon down, and when that title is bestowed, never disgrace us.

Response by MAJ Ken Landgren made Aug 22 at 2018 8:27 PM

2018-08-22T20:27:25-04:00

I had no reservations as joining the Army was my goal and imperative.

Response by CAPT Kevin B. made Aug 22 at 2018 8:27 PM

2018-08-22T20:27:35-04:00

Signing up is easy. Two things can happen. It will either work out or it won't work out. You increase the first odds greatly by investing yourself in something that has you moving forward every day. You increase the odds of the later when you give up on yourself. It isn't so much of a question of where, what, and how. It's more deciding it doesn't matter because you'll kick butt every day.

Response by SFC Michael Hasbun made Aug 22 at 2018 8:29 PM

2018-08-22T20:29:12-04:00

Not just prior to joining, it's normal to have doubts after you've joined, before every deployment, at every family separation, when you have terrible or incompetent bosses... Doubt is a normal part of life, in or out of the military.

Response by MSG Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 22 at 2018 8:35 PM

2018-08-22T20:35:12-04:00

Yes, it's normal. You are taking a step into a much larger and unknown world. And believe it or not, a large amount of military folk will have the same fear when it comes time to ETS/Retire. All very normal.

Response by Sgt Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 22 at 2018 8:37 PM

2018-08-22T20:37:21-04:00

Cole Onyx Being nervous when you are making a big life change is perfectly normal. Enjoy your upcoming challenges and adventures. Good luck, and keep us posted.

Response by SN Greg Wright made Aug 22 at 2018 11:47 PM

2018-08-22T23:47:07-04:00

It's normal to have doubts about any course of action, ever. The fact that you're assessing yourself shows a level of maturity that is not always seen in today's youth. Believe me, once you join, you'll be glad you did. Anyway, you'll be too tired in boot camp to be thinking too much ;).

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 23 at 2018 12:18 AM

2018-08-23T00:18:45-04:00

It would be abnormal if you didn't feel apprehensive. There's an "oh shit" moment you have when your Drills show up and you realize how all alone you are and you think - And that's the moment I knew I fucked up.
Of course you don't REALLY WANT this, it just sounds cool to get the glory. Chances are what you WANT to do is drink beer and chase women.
As a boy, you do things because of how you feel about. As an adult, you do things because they will make you better. The man that walks out of military 3 years will be a completely different person the the one you are now.

Response by Maj Marty Hogan made Aug 23 at 2018 7:54 AM

2018-08-23T07:54:57-04:00

Yes. I still have doubts and I swore in over 34 years ago. Life changes are always pressing- the military is more than a normal life changer. Good luck.

Response by SSG Carlos Madden made Aug 23 at 2018 9:28 AM

2018-08-23T09:28:34-04:00

I didn't have any doubts until a couple hours after I enlisted, which is almost worst.

Response by MSgt Dale Johnson made Aug 23 at 2018 9:39 AM

2018-08-23T09:39:57-04:00

Anytime you make a decision that can be life-changing you are wise to reflect on the pros and cons, in the end only you can make that decision. I spent nearly 24 years in the Air Force when I look back at some of the decisions I made sometimes I wonder how things would have turned out if I had made a different choice, but I have had a great career, have a great wife, no regrets. to quote Frank Sinatra, "I did it my way."

Response by SGM Bill Frazer made Aug 23 at 2018 10:35 AM

2018-08-23T10:35:01-04:00

Yes, called fear of the unknown.

Response by MAJ Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 23 at 2018 11:07 AM

2018-08-23T11:07:00-04:00

If you don't have doubts it's because you are an idiot... So clearly you meet the Army Requirements
There will be many occasions you'll regret your choices, but I highly recommend joining up so long as you have the mental capacity and tenacity to face adversity.
Make your decision based on the facts that this is going to be tough and if you stick to it and work through the difficulties you'll end up a much stronger, confident, and just plain better person.

If you don't have any doubts the Marines are looking for people just like you.... (just a joke...)

Response by MAJ Byron Oyler made Aug 23 at 2018 4:53 PM

2018-08-23T16:53:48-04:00

I never doubted my decision to enlist in 1992 and never questioned my desire to commission in 2003. Did I have some regrets later, like the moment I stepped off the cattle truck, oh hell yeah. Remember, it is an enlistment, not something forever. There will be parts you regret and parts you champion, it is part of growing up and what the military has done for me I could have never done on my own.

Response by PO2 Dave Johnson made Aug 24 at 2018 10:33 AM

2018-08-24T10:33:59-04:00

Yes it’s just like every big discussion in life but it is worth it

Response by MAJ Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 24 at 2018 2:29 PM

2018-08-24T14:29:57-04:00

It is completely normal but just think that you are making a life changing decision that'll benefit you in the future if you plan everything smart :)

Response by SPC William Szkromiuk made Aug 25 at 2018 1:14 PM

2018-08-25T13:14:26-04:00

You did not mention your age??
That may or may not be a factor in your uncertainty. I was 17 at the end of my senior year, I enlisted. The first morning in BASIC, as the DIs went rampaging through the barracks, I thought WTF did I do hahah. It was fine after that.
Good Luck!
And Thank You for your future service!

Response by Sgt Steven Janke made Aug 25 at 2018 1:19 PM

2018-08-25T13:19:26-04:00

Cole,
It is completely normal to feel this way when making any decision, much less one that will change your life in ways that you cannot imagine. The fear and doubt that you feel will be replaced with a sense of pride and belonging once you earn the Eagle, Globe, and Anchor. You made a great choice.

Response by SN Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 25 at 2018 2:34 PM

2018-08-25T14:34:11-04:00

I had them when I walked into RTC. So, yes it is normal.

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 27 at 2018 8:27 PM

2018-08-27T20:27:59-04:00

Its normal to have doubts after you joined. Your first few days you will be sleep deprived and doing some really boring dumb things and ask yourself why did I do this? It’s normal, just remember all those other bald privates next to you are feeling the same way.

Response by Jerry Rivas made Aug 27 at 2018 9:16 PM

2018-08-27T21:16:11-04:00

Normal....We all fear the unknown. But rest easy that millions have gone before you. We survived it. Go for it. You will be glad you did. And you might find out how good you really are. Luck

Response by Sgt Dale Briggs made Sep 2 at 2018 2:42 PM

2018-09-02T14:42:55-04:00

What else do you have going for you? College, a damn good job? If your option is turning into a townie and without an opportunity for college or trade school, going into the military will open a door. What you make of that is on you. So what career field are you looking at?

Response by Sgt Dale Briggs made Sep 19 at 2020 12:09 PM

2020-09-19T12:09:46-04:00

We swore in twice, once at the recruiting office in MEPS office in Philly, the other I think they hustled us into a side room by the Marine Corps liaison desk in Charleston and did it again, then onto the long bus ride to PI. They had a DI at the airport yelling at us until everyone showed up, one guy comes strolling up with a blond fro at least 8 inches thick, farmer bibs on, white T shirt. The white T was the only sensible thing he was wearing, that DI was wearing his ass out, I bet he was miserable at pickup, too easy a target. His recruiter did him no favors there. I never had any doubts swearing in, but at pickup was the uh oh moment that I knew life was going to suck for 13 weeks.

Response by Sgt Dale Briggs made Sep 19 at 2020 12:17 PM

2020-09-19T12:17:56-04:00

Just a word of advice, go with a fresh haircut if you have longer hair, their barbers will do the rest. Wear a clean t shirt, no Ac/ DC shirts obviously. Clean jean with no holes, sneakers. Don’t make yourself a target right off the bus. Don’t sweat it they won’t kill you, your whole platoon will be doing the same thing. Your going at a good time, I went to PI in July, Aug and Sept and I learned how to sweat really well. Run as much as you can before you go. In this crazy world you’ll learn a lot, see a lot, grow up a lot, it’s worth sweating for. Mouth shut, ears open, eyes open, just don’t look at your DIs , they don’t like that.

Response by Sgt Dale Briggs made Sep 19 at 2020 12:33 PM

2020-09-19T12:33:50-04:00

Didn’t see this was posted 2 years ago, guys probably an E3-4 by now.

Response by SCPO William Akin made Sep 20 at 2020 9:14 AM

2020-09-20T09:14:21-04:00

Abandon Hope All Ye Who Enter Here ;-)

Response by MAJ Gerald Hansen made Sep 7 at 2021 7:05 PM

2021-09-07T19:05:41-04:00

Place yourself 5-10 years from now and ask what if I had joined the military.