Is my NCO a walking SHARP complaint or am I just overreacting?

2018-03-29T03:53:20-04:00

First term, first duty station and I grew up with three brother so I am not overly sensitive, however, I have been working under an NCO that constantly talks about my body (weight and type). He has referred to me as a Clydesdale (like the horse) because he says my legs are “strong”, says I am a “power” body type and now is starting to talk to other soldiers and NCOs about my body. He talked to one soldier (E4), saying his wife is skinny but he’s usually attracted to my body type (specifically naming me). And I have now found out that he spoke with another NCO (in front of the whole damn Oroom) stating “my wife think she’s built like (me) but she’s really built like her (points to my female battle that told me about this encounter) after one NCO stayed his wife gained weight after her pregnancy. My question is...how can I stop him from constantly talking about my body without filing a SHARP complaint? I have spoken to several NCOs, warrants in my section and even our SHARP rep and they all say that without a sharp complaint, no action can be taken. Is this even a sharp complaint?? I don’t feel that he has the slightest bit of attraction for me, he just doesn’t know how to act around females?? Am I being overly sensitive or not sensitive enough. Is this EO?? Please help.

Response by PO1 Rick Serviss made Mar 29 at 2018 4:15 AM

2018-03-29T04:15:44-04:00

It's creating an uncomfortable working environment and a form of sexual harassment. If you don't want to file a complaint, can't you call him out on it in front of whoever he is saying it to? Embarrass him.

Response by SGT Russell Wickham made Mar 29 at 2018 7:46 AM

2018-03-29T07:46:48-04:00

This is precisely why SHARP was established. It is sexual harassment, and it needs to stop. The good-ol'-boy network protects their own, and often doesn't have the guts to stop behavior like this, but if he doesn't have the respect for you to stop talking about you in this manner when you ask him to, then file an unrestricted report and put a stop to it. His behavior is creating a hostile work environment, and is incompatible with the army values.

Response by CSM Richard StCyr made Mar 29 at 2018 3:14 PM

2018-03-29T15:14:31-04:00

Doesn't matter if he's "attracted to you" the NCO is out of line. Get with the SHARP rep and figure out which style of reporting is best for you , but report the incidents none the less. With all the mandatory training in effect for years now there is no longer any such animal as "Doesn't know how to act around females" anymore. The grace period for that one (if there could be one) went out in the 80's.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 5 at 2018 12:59 PM

2018-04-05T12:59:51-04:00

That's wrong on so many levels. You can take another NCO to go talk to him one on one but I feel like you are going to have to file a complaint.
This is 100% a SHARP complaint - I used to be a SARC at BN and BDE.

Response by MAJ Bryan Zeski made Apr 5 at 2018 2:05 PM

2018-04-05T14:05:43-04:00

SPC Private RallyPoint Member - I completely agree with what everyone else said, but, I think it's worth repeating. This has gone outside the bounds of any grey area and needs to be dealt with - not just for your sake, but for the sake of anyone else he works with or "leads."

I'd go up the chain a bit if you aren't ready for the SARC step:

1. Talk with your PSG and get a meeting with your PL, with just the PSG and the PL. Give them a chance to do their job. If they don't or even seem the slightest bit hesitant....

2. Make an appointment with the 1SG (via PSG) and the Company Commander. The CO has an Open-Door policy, I'm sure, but it's just courteous to go through the 1SG. When I was a Company Commander, I'd have absolutely wanted to know about this behavior going on and it would be a personal/professional mission to end it. That's really what they're there for - to take care of ALL of the Soldiers.

3. If the CO and 1SG aren't receptive, then, SARC is absolutely the next step. And when you talk to the SARC, at this point, make sure you have the details of your interactions with your Chain of Command - PSG through CO - and what actions they have or haven't taken to rectify the situation. If they haven't resolved this for you - they aren't going to resolve it for anyone else and their lack of action should be a part of what you tell the SARC. We don't need leaders who are going to turn a blind eye to this.

Response by SGM Bill Frazer made Apr 5 at 2018 9:30 PM

2018-04-05T21:30:15-04:00

Flat tell him, this makes you uncomfortable plus making it a Hostile Work Environment. 1 more comment and you will turn in a SHARP? complaint and contact the chain of command about EO/charges.