Military Networking Site not a Dating Site. Thoughts?

SSG Steven Borders — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 13:31:55 -0400

Ok, I have noticed this from a lot of fellow Rallypoint members. I noticed a few people said they had to change there pictures due to people hitting on them. I thought this site was about networking to help further our careers.

Should there be penalties for people that do such things? It is a form of harassment is it not? Would love to hear your thoughts.

Response by CPT Zachary Brooks made Mar 24 at 2015 1:32 PM

CPT Zachary Brooks — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 13:32:52 -0400

Are you talking about RP? Have you been propositioned?

Response by SPC David S. made Mar 24 at 2015 1:37 PM

SPC David S. — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 13:37:20 -0400

What if they were looking to get paid for "the date"? Wouldn't it then be a job networking site?

Response by SFC Michael Jackson, MBA made Mar 24 at 2015 1:39 PM

SFC Michael Jackson, MBA — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 13:39:32 -0400

Not sure I understand the question. As a best practice, I encourage people to keep professional networking and personal business including dating separate.
A military networking site is a professional networking and should navigated and respected as such

Response by MAJ Jim Steven made Mar 24 at 2015 1:43 PM

MAJ Jim Steven — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 13:43:27 -0400

I heard the same thing about LinkedIn.

I am all for stamping out sexism and no tolerance for harrassment, but we can not eliminate some of what is just human nature.
Men are visual, and when we see a picture of an attractive woman, we are going to click on it, wonder if she is married (for those that even care) and wonder if she is stationed near us. We are going to wonder if, upon seeing our picture, thought the same thing.
It is similar to studies where people deemed attractive are going to have an easier time getting jobs, pay raises, promotions, assistance, etc etc.
YOu can try and manage this, but it might be wasted efffort to try and completely supress it.

what I hate...when guys do this, it kills the purpose of sites such as RP or LI, and then people stop going on there, and the opportunity is gone.

Response by MSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 24 at 2015 1:53 PM

MSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 13:53:26 -0400

Meh...change your picture and/or simply say "Not interested". If someone is attractive, they get hit on. Unless you lock yourself in a closet and never come out, that's the way it's going to be.

When I say "hit on", I mean receive compliments and requests for attention that are polite and appropriate. Ex: "Wow, hi. You're pretty and I see we're stationed in the same town. Would you like to meet for coffee?" That isn't crude or distasteful. A simple yes or no should suffice. And before you say RP isn't a hookup site - you are right, it isn't. A grocery store or church aren't pickup bars either, but people meet romantic interests there all the time. I met my super hot and much younger wife of over 10 yrs on Everquest. :D

If you are receiving inappropriate comments that enter the realms of distasteful, uncivilized, or even sexual harassment - that's a different story. In that case, it doesn't matter where or how it happens, it's reportable and I would support anyone (male or female) that reported uninvited and unwanted comments that fall into the realm of sexual harassment. If not to the RP mods, report it up your chain. Remember the Navy guy that got hammered for posting on Twitter or FB that he was going to rape some Navy recruit. You can and will get hammered if you act like a moron on social media. People can and should report it.

Most importantly, I think people on both extreme sides just need to grow the f*** up. One side acts like a bunch of uncivilized primates that are either too crude or can't take no for an answer, and the other side is full of easily-offended, thin skinned pansies. Come to the middle where you can hit on someone with class and that person can tell you "not interested" without acting like they were just raped because you asked them out.

Response by PO1 Cleve Ikaika Waiwaiole made Mar 24 at 2015 1:56 PM

PO1 Cleve Ikaika Waiwaiole — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 13:56:41 -0400

I would have to say that yes, there is human nature for men or women to say things "complimenting" or in some other cases "disrespectful" or crossing that line. I would assume everyone on RP can be adults and do the right thing. I don't see anything wrong with being nice with compliments here and there-- but as for harassment, that should be zero tolerance. And for those that don't know what harassment is, it's unwanted verbal gestures towards another person. (Unwanted meaning the person was asked to stop still continues. Other than that, I believe we all can be adults and professional servicemen and gals of the United States service ;-)

Response by Cpl Anthony Pearson made Mar 24 at 2015 2:05 PM

Cpl Anthony Pearson — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 14:05:46 -0400

It's probably best to avoid this, unless people become comfortable with each other and reach out to see if there is something more to it.

Harassment is Harassment. If the messages are rude, inappropriate, etc., report them and our admins will handle it.

Response by SrA Matthew Knight made Mar 24 at 2015 2:13 PM

SrA Matthew Knight — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 14:13:23 -0400

Wait...you mean I am not going to meet cute military singles here. Darn popup advertisements.

Really I think there should be something done if it's happening. It's one thing to view someone's profile, it's another to send them messages bothering them about it.

Response by LTC Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 24 at 2015 2:58 PM

LTC Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 14:58:20 -0400

Hitting on people? Seriously? Its one thing to find another attractive but come on.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 24 at 2015 3:02 PM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 15:02:27 -0400

I don't there should be a penalty unless it's reported by a member.
If someone wants to talk to you on a different or personal level, just say no if you are not interested.

Response by SFC Mark Merino made Mar 24 at 2015 3:06 PM

SFC Mark Merino — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 15:06:38 -0400

This is the first time I have heard about it. To my knowledge, no one has even submitted a complaint to the help desk. PLEASE come forward and submit your complaints to the help desk. v/r, Uncle Mark

SSG Steven Borders , thanks for looking out for the community!

Response by SGT(P) Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 24 at 2015 3:12 PM

SGT(P) Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 15:12:23 -0400

SSG Steven Borders I do hesitate when I want to see somebody's profile because of the notification it sends to the RP member and I don't want to look like a creep. Thank God we don't have pictures albums here, that would take this hitting thing to another level.

Response by Capt Richard I P. made Mar 24 at 2015 3:49 PM

Capt Richard I P. — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 15:49:54 -0400

I'd say this is another example of the potential for low value content and bad behavior threatening the long term viability of the site by driving away quality users.

The answer is to use the tools given to us by the RP team, police our own, suggest new, good ideas to the RP team (like 'flag post' buttons) to better enhance the efforts of RP admins and the team. Above all set the example and do what you want to see here.

Ductus Exemplo.

EDIT: To be clear: The topic above is an important one to discuss and SSG Steven Borders did well to raise it. My intent with my commentary was to discuss the instances the OP mentions in which RP members have been propositioned or in some way made uncomfortable: and to exhort us to take care of our own by keeping it professional.

Response by SGT Richard H. made Mar 24 at 2015 3:51 PM

SGT Richard H. — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 15:51:15 -0400

Is this really a thing?

Response by MSG Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 24 at 2015 3:57 PM

MSG Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 15:57:48 -0400

To some, networking has a whole new meaning I guess.

Response by SSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 24 at 2015 3:59 PM

SSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 15:59:08 -0400

Um, the reason for the changes in pictures are due in large part to ISIS threats.

Response by MSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 24 at 2015 4:24 PM

MSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 16:24:37 -0400

It could be a form of harassment. I'd wager a guess though that in most cases it's just using the site incorrectly/inappropriately. If someone's being persistent and/or harassing they should be reported to the admin, and possibly through other chains if necessary.

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 24 at 2015 4:33 PM

CPT Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 16:33:50 -0400

I think it depends on the content. If it is nothing more than flattery I don't think if it is much an issue. I have fallen victim to "Man Love Mondays." If a female or male garners wanted attention I think they should be able block such a person. It is hard to ignore someone that send you endless messages.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 24 at 2015 4:36 PM

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 16:36:18 -0400

All across the military there should be a level of professional environment. There's a difference between flirting through messages on RP and looking at someone's profile. Either way, this website is for discussions and furthering your career. RP shouldn't have anything to do with dating and more to do with what's going on in the world and our views on the matter. But since I'm discussing the topic. In my opinion, dating in the military is just fine as long as it is professional and it does not negatively interfere with your unit. As for punishment being concerned, I do not think any should be taken unless said flirting has evolved to harassment.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 24 at 2015 5:48 PM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 17:48:06 -0400

As of this post- not one comment (out of 43) from a woman user. I find that interesting and wanted to share.

That is all.

Response by Cpl Michael Riordan, CISM, CISSP, CISA made Mar 24 at 2015 7:49 PM

Cpl Michael Riordan, CISM, CISSP, CISA — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 19:49:03 -0400

I would never think to do that. I am human and a man but I thought this site wanted to be a Linkedin on steroids? I saw a comment about LinkedIn getting the same and I'm surprised. I would never play that with my business face on. It's one thing if your acquainted but this is supposed to be a professional site. I certainly don't think a penalty is the answer. You harass someone, you get booted from the site. I thought sharing a site with Active military it would be more professional. Although I don't fall under the UCMJ anymore either. Just my thoughts.

Response by SFC Collin McMillion made Mar 24 at 2015 8:10 PM

SFC Collin McMillion — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 20:10:11 -0400

This is not a dating site! Administration should, if any one in try to "hit", or in any way make sexual advances toward any one on here, immediately remove them and black list them for good. There are hundreds of these type of sites all over the net, leave Rally Point alone or be gone for good.

Response by SSG Robert Burns made Mar 24 at 2015 10:13 PM

SSG Robert Burns — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 22:13:24 -0400

No! You will NOT bring mandatory SHARP training into RP!

Response by SSG Robert Burns made Mar 24 at 2015 10:15 PM

SSG Robert Burns — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 22:15:53 -0400

Here's a thought. In order to get a message from someone you have to be connected to them. Then you can disconnect from them.

Response by SSG Robert Burns made Mar 24 at 2015 10:17 PM

SSG Robert Burns — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 22:17:46 -0400

You don't have to be lonely at Soldiersonly.com

Response by PO2 Neil Manischewitz made Mar 24 at 2015 11:59 PM

PO2 Neil Manischewitz — Tue, 24 Mar 2015 23:59:34 -0400

It goes on in the workplace also, so is it really a surprise that it doesn't go on here? Although it can't be dealt with the same way on here that it can in person, unless it gets out of hand of course.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 25 at 2015 5:00 AM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 25 Mar 2015 05:00:30 -0400

SSG Steven Borders, show us on the doll where RP touched you.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 25 at 2015 5:09 AM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 25 Mar 2015 05:09:03 -0400

SSG Steven Borders, I would like to see an example of where this has actually happened. I think you were eager to start a topic to get the points.

As usual there's the crowd that chimes in on UCMJ this and professionalism that. This site can be used for both socializing and for professional inquiries/mentoring. There must be a serious void in the actual lives of some military members when they need RP to be the leader they may not be in real life.

If there is anybody getting hit on then it shouldn't be an infraction of site rules unless it crosses over to harassment. The fact is men and women are sometimes attracted to each other. It's what propagates the species. In this overly PC/no spine military we have today it's a capital crime to look at a woman. Personally hitting on anyone is the last reason I come to RP. My wife gets pissed when I date.

Response by SPC James Mcneil made Mar 25 at 2015 7:21 AM

SPC James Mcneil — Wed, 25 Mar 2015 07:21:50 -0400

Maybe I've been living under a rock. I haven't seen this. Probably this is a good thing.

Response by SFC Samantha Wood made Mar 25 at 2015 12:02 PM

SFC Samantha Wood — Wed, 25 Mar 2015 12:02:49 -0400

We are all adults. I think that everyone can take a little flirt here and there. You can still be successful and not be a stick in the mud. It's really not that serious. Plus a lot of you that are complaining probably won't have to worry about it anyway

Response by SSG Gerhard S. made Mar 25 at 2015 3:11 PM

SSG Gerhard S. — Wed, 25 Mar 2015 15:11:23 -0400

First, let me say that I've been out of the dating game for 29 years, and have been out of the Army for about 10 years and 2 weeks. I'm likely a bit rusty concerning what "hitting on" means as well as what the regs say. But here goes.

As I understand it, "hitting on" means suggesting one is interested in getting to know another, or may manifest as a compliment, perhaps with the intent of fostering a relationship in the future if there turns out to be mutual interest. I can't imagine there's anything inherently wrong with this activity, barring any regulations regarding inter-rank, or some other defined form of fraternization.

Forgive my saying so, but it's been my impression throughout life that that's how people meet one another.
Now, if the party "hit" upon makes it clear there is no interest, and the "hitting upon" persists.... There lies a problem. NOW we're talking about harassment. I think it's important to define our terms in order to be properly understood.

If I'm off base regarding any of this, I welcome any corrections or constructive criticism.

Response by LCDR Rabbah Rona Matlow made Mar 25 at 2015 7:57 PM

LCDR Rabbah Rona Matlow — Wed, 25 Mar 2015 19:57:59 -0400

How is this any different, in that respect, from working in an office or squad bay or whatever?

It is very unfortunate that there are a few Neanderthals who want to hit on fellow RPers and start bugging them...

Peacocks have long beautiful feathers that they spread to attract the peahens for mating. Human males don't have such a feature (at least that you can show in public in polite society...)

So maybe, if some are on the prowl, they just post complimentary pictures of themselves and make smart, wise, informed responses to questions, and if others are interested, they can contact you off line...

Response by CPL Jesse Vasconcelos made Mar 25 at 2015 9:56 PM

CPL Jesse Vasconcelos — Wed, 25 Mar 2015 21:56:30 -0400

It is what it is. If our nations finest hook up then more power to them.

Response by TSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 25 at 2015 9:59 PM

TSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 25 Mar 2015 21:59:15 -0400

If there is an issue with an individual then it should be reported and that person should be removed. If a person does not have their profile verified in a short amount of time then they should be discharged from the site just to register over and over again. Eventually they will discontinue their use.

Response by SSG Robert Burns made Mar 25 at 2015 10:08 PM

SSG Robert Burns — Wed, 25 Mar 2015 22:08:41 -0400

If I had an influence point for every time I've been hit on here......

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 25 at 2015 11:11 PM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 25 Mar 2015 23:11:48 -0400

I haven't seen what sort of (if any) moderation goes on here. If an offense was especially egregious or it became a repeated pattern, individuals could be banned from the site (possibly a temporary suspension at first).

Is it harassment? I don't think this is any different than real life. Which is to say: it depends. The unit workplace isn't a bar (usually) yet people sometimes find a romantic connection with each other. At the same time, some people don't know how to employ subtlety or can't take a hint and stop when their advances are unwanted. So yes it could be harassment, but I would say that all flirting (even on a site not intended for that purpose) is not automatically harassment.

Response by SSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 26 at 2015 10:45 AM

SSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Thu, 26 Mar 2015 10:45:58 -0400

I was also under the impression that this was a professional networking site. There will always be people out there that will try to take it to another level, people are always searching for companionship but they need to know that this is not the place for that. If they are ignorant to the purpose of this network then a warning for a first offense but if they keep it up then they should be kicked off. The last thing I think anyone that enjoys this network wants is for it to become something similar to a Facebook/Match.com.

Response by SGM Erik Marquez made Mar 26 at 2015 11:08 AM

SGM Erik Marquez — Thu, 26 Mar 2015 11:08:12 -0400

Married White Male, in a committed relationship, likely to end in divorce, physical mutilation and mysterious disappearance should users respond to this ad in a manner not intended.

Is seeking Friends with few benefits... Male, female, other.. gender not important... Must be attractive...or kind of attractive, or at least clean and drug free, prefer non smoker. Must be open minded.. things can get kinky.. need to have an open mind, think outside the box to come up with solutions to unkink things that get kinked. Looking for a swap party....... One month we do a bike maintenance work party in my shop, next month in yours. Alcohol allowed only after the sweating, grunting, major physical exertion, lubes & oils and tools are put away.
If you're interested must send full frontal and side view naked pictures ...............................................................................................................................................of your bike..need to see it without fairings to prove your real, you own a bike and at least own the tools and knowledge to take them off.

Response by SGT Jeremiah B. made Mar 26 at 2015 1:41 PM

SGT Jeremiah B. — Thu, 26 Mar 2015 13:41:15 -0400

I chose my picture so I WOULD get hit on. Alas, it has not panned out.

Seriously though, I think the problem isn't necessarily that any one guy decides to try his luck. It's that it's never just one. At some point, deflecting would become tedious.

Also, some of us are classless beasts. That doesn't help either.

Response by SSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 26 at 2015 2:45 PM

SSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Thu, 26 Mar 2015 14:45:14 -0400

I don't think that the issue should be whether or not this should be allowed, but rather a way for ANY individual to feel free from harassment in any given situation. One possible way would be allowing users to block those they feel are harassing them that is somehow associated with a ticket submitted to admins so as to prevent abuse and actually weed out offenders to get them removed immediately from this community.

That's just my two cents.

Response by 1LT Nick Kidwell made Mar 26 at 2015 3:09 PM

1LT Nick Kidwell — Thu, 26 Mar 2015 15:09:38 -0400

I'm not getting hit on. I guess I'm not pretty enough for RP? ;)

Response by PFC Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 26 at 2015 4:55 PM

PFC Private RallyPoint Member — Thu, 26 Mar 2015 16:55:17 -0400

Strictly dating purposes is unacceptable and unprofessional. Looking for locals as potential friends is acceptable, but should remain professional. Perfectly acceptable if some sort of romance happens later, assuming the relationship itself is acceptable by military standards (i.e. no fraternization is present). Lastly, any sort of harassment should be responded to with both action from RP staff and the chain of command.

Response by SSG Gelbert Samsung made Mar 26 at 2015 6:36 PM

SSG Gelbert Samsung — Thu, 26 Mar 2015 18:36:21 -0400

https://www.change.org/p/barack-obama-army-fox-news-cnn-abc-hold-command-accountable-for-selecting-cases-based-of-discrimination-retaliation-and-racism-with-double-standards?recruiter=264457876&utm_source=share_petition&utm_medium=facebook&utm_campaign=share_facebook_responsive&utm_term=mob-xs-no_src-no_msg

Response by PV2 Violet Case made Mar 26 at 2015 7:22 PM

PV2 Violet Case — Thu, 26 Mar 2015 19:22:41 -0400

Yes I would agree with you that it is harassment. But it has been like that for centuries that when someone finds someone else interesting or nice looking sometimes some comments are took the wrong way and seem like harassment when maybe they are just complementing the person. But to actually sexually harass someone is different. But to say you are pretty or nice looking should be as a complement and not drug to extremes.

Response by SGT Rick Ash made Mar 26 at 2015 7:27 PM

SGT Rick Ash — Thu, 26 Mar 2015 19:27:09 -0400

It is NOT a dating site. It was meant to help us network and further our careers. Why do the minority mess up everything for the majority?

Response by LTC Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 26 at 2015 9:56 PM

LTC Private RallyPoint Member — Thu, 26 Mar 2015 21:56:38 -0400

The administrators should make it clear what the objectives and what is allowed and whats not. Networking can include different things: discussions (political military, hobby, etc), jobs assistance, (military or civilian) mentoring, or seeking friends (dating or non dating) Just make it clear. That being said, I don't see anything wrong with dating as long as it is respectful-if the person says no then its no. If someone is upset that someone is "hitting on them" then it becomes sexual harassment. In that case, the admins should immediately step in and have consequences and make it clear ahead of time that that kind of thing is not acceptable and what the consequences are.

Response by CW4 Larry Curtis made Mar 26 at 2015 10:56 PM

CW4 Larry Curtis — Thu, 26 Mar 2015 22:56:22 -0400

The internet does lots of things to people. For one thing it gives them this overwhelming sense that they can do or say anything they want to without impunity since the persons on the other end cannot touch them. They can be anyone they want to be on the internet as well. It's a crazy little game to a lot of people. There are those who use it for good, and those who use it for diabolical reasons. I don't see this changing anytime soon. However, in the case of a site or group which is oriented toward professional aspects, it is incumbent upon these people we commonly refer to as administrators to insure steps are taken to keep things on the level. That alone could be a full time job as it necessitates a great deal of human interaction, in other words you just can't allow the site to run itself, you have to be involved in it's operation. Rules need to be established and followed. If they are not followed, violators get the boot and their IP banned. Simple as that.

Honestly, it has been so blasted long since anyone has attempted to hit on me, or me on anyone else, that I don't even think about it anymore. I think there is much of that which may be misinterpreted, just from an outside objective view, because there are those who I think may be overly sensitive to it. But that is not to say that much of it isn't legitimate, and I digress to what I said about having established rules of conduct and behavior. Bottom line, if you sincerely want the benefits of being a member of a particular group, be professional about it and carry on as if that is what you are there for and nothing else. Otherwise, your membership will be in jeopardy...and there should be no tolerance. You cross the line, even a little bit, you're out of there! BANG! End of subject.

I am waiting for the day that some wise guy develops an application which allows you to slap someone on the other end through their computer screen.

Response by SSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 27 at 2015 9:39 AM

SSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 27 Mar 2015 09:39:07 -0400

I hope this isn't just a site for career progression as I am a year from retirement. I was hoping to link up with friends of mine that I had served with and be able to keep in touch with them. That being said I have no problems sharing my experience and letting folks know where I have went wrong in my career progression. I will say going from Green to Blue was my biggest mistake.

Response by SSG Richard Reilly made Mar 27 at 2015 11:10 AM

SSG Richard Reilly — Fri, 27 Mar 2015 11:10:23 -0400

Yeah I never put a picture up to avoid this. I mean now I only get offers to help a prince in Nigeria. I can't wait for him to get here and give me back the $100,000 I gave him with the 100% interest.

Bet you think this song is about you....don't you!?

Response by SPC Donald Moore made Mar 27 at 2015 12:23 PM

SPC Donald Moore — Fri, 27 Mar 2015 12:23:54 -0400

I don't understand it. I have not been getting people hitting on me.

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 27 at 2015 4:53 PM

SGT Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 27 Mar 2015 16:53:23 -0400

I must be ugly...

:-(

NO I don't want your PITY...... SSSHHHHH

Bahahahah

Who's this Spc Vote down?? I wonder what was wrong with your question...

Response by SSgt Joe V. made Mar 27 at 2015 5:01 PM

SSgt Joe V. — Fri, 27 Mar 2015 17:01:40 -0400

I put my profile picture up to specifically showcase my purple tie...that is it. I can't really talk anyway, I connected with SGT Private RallyPoint Member because she tells it how it is, and she has a nice picture. Not gonna date her though - married (happily) with kids here. Someone said it right...if there is interest, take it off RP and get a room :-)

Response by Capt Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 27 at 2015 5:07 PM

Capt Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 27 Mar 2015 17:07:29 -0400

After spending too much time and effort reading the posts on this topic these are my thoughts.

If one is so bad off that he/she has to resort to this type of forum to find a mate. That person has a problem that this site will not correct.

If we as a society had observed the conduct that some seem to think we should i.e. any attention is harassment, we would have solved the growing population problem years ago.

In the end simple respect for each other, and setting simple and open boundaries should usually prevent any problems. When someone does not respond to know then the admin should be notified and correct the problem.

Response by Cpl Earl Lewis made Mar 27 at 2015 7:24 PM

Cpl Earl Lewis — Fri, 27 Mar 2015 19:24:35 -0400

I would be flattered...but must digress. I Wanted to find all the Marines I served with during Operations Desert Shield / Desert Storm. I am on the cusp of receiving a Bachelors Degree from Upper Iowa University, and want to invite them to see me getting that degree.

Response by SGT Rick Ash made Mar 28 at 2015 2:03 AM

SGT Rick Ash — Sat, 28 Mar 2015 02:03:29 -0400

I'm not worried about "getting hit on" here in RP.

Uh, have you seen my photo?

Response by MAJ Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 28 at 2015 3:04 AM

MAJ Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 28 Mar 2015 03:04:42 -0400

stop hitting on me everyone.

Response by SSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 28 at 2015 3:16 AM

SSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 28 Mar 2015 03:16:32 -0400

I can be bribed! LovL

Response by SSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 28 at 2015 3:35 AM

SSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 28 Mar 2015 03:35:53 -0400

I was the only one on a dating and got stood up.. My luck! I tell ya! lol

Response by MSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 28 at 2015 8:25 AM

MSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 28 Mar 2015 08:25:52 -0400

I'm rather new to Rally Point but personally I haven't experienced anything but complete professionalism. If for some reason I was "hit on" I would handle it the same as I do in person. Politely say I'm married and unless the individual was harassing me I'd take it as a compliment and move on with my day.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 30 at 2015 1:11 AM

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 30 Mar 2015 01:11:53 -0400

I guess my picture is not good enough as I have not been propositioned.

Now I feel left out. LOL!

Response by PV2 Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 30 at 2015 10:47 AM

PV2 Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 30 Mar 2015 10:47:22 -0400

It's ridiculous because they haven't met the person either

Response by Sgt Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 31 at 2015 3:05 PM

Sgt Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 31 Mar 2015 15:05:02 -0400

Forcing a penalty on someone just because they think some is attractive is a bit a harsh. Everyone has a keyboard and can type the word NO or not interested in a message. Hitting on someone is not a form of harassement. No need to take things to the extreme.

Response by Sgt Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 31 at 2015 3:07 PM

Sgt Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 31 Mar 2015 15:07:35 -0400

some of y'all have some funny sense of humors. Interesting post.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 6 at 2015 5:46 PM

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 06 Apr 2015 17:46:23 -0400

Yes to me it is a form of harassment. To me this web site is to connect to other service members and respond in kind to questions that you or they may have to further their careers or education not to get a date. If your looking for a date go to eharmony. Not on this web site.

Response by SrA Edward Vong made May 6 at 2015 11:16 AM

SrA Edward Vong — Wed, 06 May 2015 11:16:03 -0400

I can't help it, I'm just that damn good looking.

Response by MAJ Ken Landgren made May 6 at 2015 1:58 PM

MAJ Ken Landgren — Wed, 06 May 2015 13:58:06 -0400

I subscribe to the 10% rule which means 10% of the population don't want to play within the rules.

Response by SSG (ret) William Martin made May 13 at 2015 3:25 AM

SSG (ret) William Martin — Wed, 13 May 2015 03:25:49 -0400

If two people meet and they become intimately involved then so be it. Its none of my business, and I don't care. If they take the relationship off of RP whether its being friends or intimate partners, RP has no jurisdiction and it would actually cause less headaches that way in my opinion.

Response by SPC Private RallyPoint Member made May 13 at 2015 8:46 AM

SPC Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 13 May 2015 08:46:19 -0400

I think my photo is pretty conservative and I get requests all the time from men of all ranks. I got requests before I was even responding to stuff or asking questions. How did they even find me? I feel uncomfortable and almost always deny the request unless I know you personally or we have a professional discussion.

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made May 13 at 2015 8:53 AM

CPT Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 13 May 2015 08:53:16 -0400

Its the baggy oversized uniforms...we just can't resist the frumpiness of the Armed Services uniforms. Wooo, and the PT uniform, the way our kneecaps peek out from the hemline, it sets my heart a flutter. Lol.
Haven't seen people getting hit on, I've only seen rude name calling, and immaturity regarding differences of opinion & people ganging up on someone for disagreeing with certain sentiments.

Response by SrA Private RallyPoint Member made May 13 at 2015 10:36 AM

SrA Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 13 May 2015 10:36:28 -0400

I think that some of the confusion comes from a lot of us will go thru the new people that have just joined and Just start adding people For me its a way of networking with other people as well as being someone that a new member can ask for help if needed. does it matter if the picture is "Hot"... not in the slightest... I know a lot of people that have Photos that are "hot" or "Pretty" but you see them in person and it is a total different story... It is hard to believe that there are people here that just want to hit on people.... No One should make you want to change your profile in any way.... If there is harassment going on please notify one of our Fabulous Member Admins with what is going on so they can look into it... But at the same time common sense and tact goes along way. In my opinion if someone sends a private message saying " You look really sharp in your profile pic." or " your very pretty" I know my reply would just be a thank you and leave it at that.. Now if it goes farther then that, it may become an issue. If you ask someone to stop their advances and they dont.. again an issue, but if they stop and apologize... no harm no foul as many people on here have said we are all adults and should act like it.

Response by Capt Ron Sherlock made May 13 at 2015 11:29 AM

Capt Ron Sherlock — Wed, 13 May 2015 11:29:27 -0400

If this is an issue, I wonder if the problem lies in our profile under "Personal Information" where we can list our marital status. I'm new here and when I filled out my profile, I was thinking "Why is this category an option for a professional military site?" My first thoughts were, just like any other internet social site in the world, there are people looking for love and grind and it's to tell the world if you are available or not. My second thoughts were perhaps maybe topics like dating in the military, military spouses and marriage topics might come up which is probably the more likely rational explanation. Anyway, I think most of us are adults here and know how to handle unwanted advances.

Response by SGT Anthony Bussing made May 13 at 2015 11:40 AM

SGT Anthony Bussing — Wed, 13 May 2015 11:40:42 -0400

in the time ive been here...ive only seen one or maybe two females on here I would ever consider hitting on...if I did that sort of thing...but since im a Troglodyte, I dont really have many worries...my "kill ratio" is worse then the Bolivian air force

Response by Sgt David G Duchesneau made May 13 at 2015 2:10 PM

Sgt David G Duchesneau — Wed, 13 May 2015 14:10:44 -0400

This is a Social Networking site and after all, anything and everything is possible. If you think that you are being "harassed" or "being hit on", God, count your blessings! Come on my brother's and sister's , have a sense of humor and just enjoy the ride. After all, you can always just hit "delete" or ignore it! Now, if it gets to be "sexual Harassment" or it gets out of hand, just let one of the Admin's know. God knows that we have enough of them.

Response by SGT Rick Ash made May 13 at 2015 2:58 PM

SGT Rick Ash — Wed, 13 May 2015 14:58:38 -0400

RP is not, nor should it be a "dating/courting" website. From what I hear, there are plenty of those. There is only ONE Rally Point.

Response by MSgt Private RallyPoint Member made May 13 at 2015 3:18 PM

MSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 13 May 2015 15:18:37 -0400

Penalties? What is this place? Are we in High School? Here's the deal, if people are afraid of how theur are percieved then they need to change their look; however, IF it is a profile picture that "makes" someone hit on them then that person has some serious issues, and they would hit on a profile of a baboon's ass.

I came here to look into an alternative to Facebook. I was getting dick pics on a regular basis. Everntually, my gay brother got tired of me forwarding them all to him.

Ladies and Gents, This is the grown up world. If they are "into" you then they will tell you. If they don't say anything, they are not worth your time or effort.

Response by SFC Christopher Perry made May 13 at 2015 7:55 PM

SFC Christopher Perry — Wed, 13 May 2015 19:55:03 -0400

I think I am pretty safe with my photo, it shows off my wrinkles quite well.

Response by SFC Joseph James made May 15 at 2015 1:52 AM

SFC Joseph James — Fri, 15 May 2015 01:52:07 -0400

I wouldn't be mad if some of you told me I had pretty eyes every now and then! Lol

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made May 22 at 2015 7:18 AM

SGT Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 22 May 2015 07:18:20 -0400

Is this a dating site? I never thought of it as such. Are there some lonely veterans, looking to hook-up? Of course! Every demographic has their "singles." Is Rally Point a dating site? Nah. But, keep in mind, if you are an attractive person, no matter what forum to which you belong, there is a chance you will be "hit on."

If the comments become obscene, vulgar, or harassing in nature, then there are channels for dealing with it. But, just like any other adult interaction, note your expectations up front, in a professional manner. If you're not looking to date/hook-up, just say so, or ignore them (based on their conduct).

V/r,

Frank

Response by SFC John Birks made Aug 25 at 2015 3:19 PM

SFC John Birks — Tue, 25 Aug 2015 15:19:01 -0400

Boy, I see the can of worms just got opened up with this topic.. I agree with a lot of these comments, we are adults, granted some don't act like it. Bottom line is, be up front. If you don't like someone or something that you see on here. Do something about it. Let them know that they crossed the line. What's the worst thing that can happen? Will that person take away your birthday?

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Jan 10 at 2019 10:17 AM

CPT Private RallyPoint Member — Thu, 10 Jan 2019 10:17:15 -0500

Depends on how its done." Hey I noticed you were in the same area, would you like to meet up for coffee? " That's a compliment and should be met with ( after checking rank ) with either a yes or no thank you. If you start with "you're hot" or a send a dick pick on what is a professional site, where most of the women's pictures I see are in business suits or uniform...I'm going to not answer or answer a lot less polite.

*And for the love of god, don't send even an appropriate message to a female who is an officer if you are enlisted, b/c I have no nice way to respond. You may be cute but your sure as hell not as cute as my career.

Response by PV2 Violet Case made Aug 7 at 2019 3:16 PM

PV2 Violet Case — Wed, 07 Aug 2019 15:16:39 -0400

My comment was meant to a comment from someone else. To start an online business since he had troubles on finding a date with like minded people like veterans do I suggested he start a business date site that might benefit military and veterans a like. And might give other places for it besides here is what I was trying to do.

Response by Wayne Soares made Jun 16 at 2020 9:02 AM

Wayne Soares — Tue, 16 Jun 2020 09:02:26 -0400

Totally agree. Penalties Should be imposed. Zero Tolerance for harassment