Should I keep my girlfriend, who lives in Seattle, when I PCS to Kansas?

SPC Cameron Hale — Fri, 24 Feb 2017 05:45:50 -0500

I love her but do you think visiting her and keeping the relationship would be realistic?

Response by SrA Edward Vong made Feb 24 at 2017 7:23 AM

SrA Edward Vong — Fri, 24 Feb 2017 07:23:57 -0500

That's on you bro. None of us on this site can make that decision for you. The only advice I can give you would be, do you still want to be in a relationship with her at long distance? And how does she feel about it?

Response by SGT Ben Keen made Feb 24 at 2017 9:23 AM

SGT Ben Keen — Fri, 24 Feb 2017 09:23:31 -0500

Having a relationship takes a lot of work; even more so when you are a service member. The key is communication. Be open and honest with her and yourself. I think it's important to remember that you are still very young and this will be only the first of many times that you will be moved far away from loved ones. If it's meant to be, it will be. Thankfully with technology like Skype and Facetime, keeping that communication line open is easier than it used to be.

Response by 1SG Private RallyPoint Member made Feb 24 at 2017 10:21 AM

1SG Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 24 Feb 2017 10:21:02 -0500

You can try and make it work but whatever you do please do not marry this girl just because you are leaving. Too many Soldiers get married just because they are PCS'ing and it only ends up badly. Try and make the long distance work out. With todays technology you can stay in touch and take 4 day passes and leave to go visit. If it doesn't work out then let her know sooner then later.

Response by SFC(P) Private RallyPoint Member made Feb 24 at 2017 11:23 AM

SFC(P) Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 24 Feb 2017 11:23:53 -0500

No, you're young and there's a lot of things that you're going to experience. And don't get married just because you don't want to live in the barracks. Marry her because you love her.

Response by SFC(P) Private RallyPoint Member made Feb 24 at 2017 11:51 AM

SFC(P) Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 24 Feb 2017 11:51:22 -0500

It is going to be difficult and i would tell you not a good idea

Response by CPL Eric Escasio made Feb 24 at 2017 12:11 PM

CPL Eric Escasio — Fri, 24 Feb 2017 12:11:54 -0500

Brother all I can say is that when you go to Kansas you guys will be far away from each other and that would be a really nice thing to happen because it will really be a test if your love for each other will be true and true to last forever. It will give both of you time and space to clearly think and allow your relationship to grow, and later you both will find out if your meant for each other. Have a great weekend brother man.

Response by SFC Michael Arabian made Feb 24 at 2017 12:26 PM

SFC Michael Arabian — Fri, 24 Feb 2017 12:26:52 -0500

I can only tell you of my experience. I had a long distance relationship with my wife for a year before we got married. She lived in Small town in Alabama while I was stationed at Fort Steward GA. During that years we spent as much time together as possible. We just celebrated our 25 wedding anniversary last month. So if you both want it to work out, it can. Good luck and I hope thing work out for the best

Response by SGT David Crutchfield made Feb 24 at 2017 1:21 PM

SGT David Crutchfield — Fri, 24 Feb 2017 13:21:18 -0500

In my experience, it will only work if both of you truly want it to. Was your PCS volunteer or mandatory? You got to think it is as hard if not harder for her but this will be a test of trust and honor. If either or both are broken, it won't work

Response by SGT Jose Perdelia-Torres made Feb 24 at 2017 1:54 PM

SGT Jose Perdelia-Torres — Fri, 24 Feb 2017 13:54:51 -0500

No, you have doubt and that right there is a sign its time to move on. Do you disagree? - then keep the relationship intact and prove me wrong.

Response by CPT Jeff Harrod made Feb 24 at 2017 6:45 PM

CPT Jeff Harrod — Fri, 24 Feb 2017 18:45:04 -0500

Honestly, if you have to ask that question, then you already know the answer. Take it from someone who stayed with the wrong woman for 21 years and was miserable the whole time. When the "right" one comes along, you will know. And you won't even have a single thought about whether you should remain in contact or not. You will ache when you are away from her. You won't be able to stop thinking about her. And you will feel incomplete without her in your life.

Response by SPC Kristen Jauregui made Feb 28 at 2017 8:37 AM

SPC Kristen Jauregui — Tue, 28 Feb 2017 08:37:00 -0500

If you're at all looking forward to the move and having more guy time or something like that then just break it off. Unless you two have a ton of history and trust, you'll tear each other apart long distance. Or try it for a little while and prove me wrong. The first signs of distrust and jealousy... it doesn't get better in my experience.

Response by SrA Kemp Hall made Feb 28 at 2017 10:44 PM

SrA Kemp Hall — Tue, 28 Feb 2017 22:44:35 -0500

Yeah man, marry her. Divorce is military tradition. "Break ups" are lame. Put some paperwork into it and maybe knock her up.

I mean... if you have to ask.