The Holidays are here. For vets with PTSD, what are the holidays like for you?

2015-12-17T13:23:37-05:00

On my veteran talk show Coming Home Well this Sunday night at 7:30pm EST, we are talking about the holiday season and how it affects veterans. Feel free to join the discussion sunday night by clicking the link below, or comment here and I'll read your comments on air.

What are the holidays like for you? Are there large gatherings you try to avoid? How about the shopping process for gifts? What coping mechanisms do you use, and how can civilians help you? If you could tell a civilian one thing about veterans and the holidays, what would it be?

http://ccst.io/e/cominghomewell6

Response by PFC Chip Des made Dec 17 at 2015 1:31 PM

2015-12-17T13:31:26-05:00

really lousey, i am alone and still not working, like to work on holidays so i can forget no family anymore, looking for any job i can do thats not heavy backbreaking work am a DV, any info email me at [login to see] looking for solar or medical marjuania, MSNBC reports wage 15.00hr.

Response by CPO Joseph Grant made Dec 17 at 2015 1:35 PM

2015-12-17T13:35:46-05:00

I avoid crowds. Holidays don't bother me, they're just another work day or were when I could work. I hate slamming doors, cabinets and loud noises. I get nervous when I see a middle eastern person leave an item and then pull out a cell phone. I need to sit with my back up against the wall. I'm hypervigilant when it comes to people and smells. Smells trigger flashbacks. Biggest thing I can say to civilians is don't get aggressive towards me. If I'm shopping and I accidentally cut you off or vice versa bowing up to me is the wrong answer. My fight or flight response just defaults to fight now. People just need to be civil.

Response by MAJ Ken Landgren made Dec 17 at 2015 2:12 PM

2015-12-17T14:12:28-05:00

Don't judge us just because you don't have PTSD.

Response by SSG Ricardo Marcial made Dec 17 at 2015 2:34 PM

2015-12-17T14:34:38-05:00

As Dec 24th approaches I have so many mixed feelings. on the 24th I celebrate my son's birthday, a little ball of energy that has kept me focused since his birth 5 years ago. But I also mourn the loss of 3 friends killed on Dec 24th, 2003 near Samarrah. There are other things going on as well but those 2 things are the 2 that are on my mind the most. I will continue to remember the good those men did in Iraq, they were engineers building schools, putting smiles on the children of Iraq when they came to visit and bring them the things they needed. Their lives lost but still today I hope still remembered by those they helped. My son keeps me going, intrigued by my military pictures, my gear, and some of my better stories I share with him.

thanks for this post,

Merry Christmas to all, and remember those lost and those still deployed. God Bless.

Response by CPL Rob Stocker made Dec 17 at 2015 4:36 PM

2015-12-17T16:36:00-05:00

Thank God for online shopping and dropship delivery!

Response by PO2 Sam Messer made Dec 18 at 2015 12:04 AM

2015-12-18T00:04:09-05:00

Thanks giving to March- April I am in bunker mode. Nov 1967 recon & Special Forces told us we were surrounded @ Khe Sanh. Every night standing watch fog settled in black as hell can't see the marine lines in front of you, every sound real or imagined sets the senses off the scale. Comes Jan 21 st 1968 the shit hit the fan, now can't forget & the film runs & runs. Nightmares - Terror dreams & body Bags lined up on the strip! You would think after all these years it would get better but NO it doesn't ! I have learned the Anniversary Dates, The days everyone needs to leave me alone, so I bunker up.... http://vet6768bb.com

Sam and Brenda's Home Page

sam messer's life as a Seabee,his family and other things.

Response by 1SG Private RallyPoint Member made Dec 18 at 2015 2:15 AM

2015-12-18T02:15:10-05:00

The best way I can describe it is lonely.
I won't be alone; there will be the kids, my folks, relatives, church on Christmas Eve...
But I will be alone with my thoughts.
"Peace in Earth, goodwill towards men" takes on a whole 'nother meaning.

Response by LCDR Rabbah Rona Matlow made Dec 18 at 2015 10:34 AM

2015-12-18T10:34:07-05:00

As a counselor who works with Vets, I'm always concerned about what the holidays will bring. Let's hope that all stay safe...

Response by MAJ Ken Landgren made Dec 18 at 2015 11:20 AM

2015-12-18T11:20:18-05:00

What I see is the bright colors, presents, and food, but I can't hear the treble or the bass.

Response by SSgt Terry P. made Dec 18 at 2015 11:44 AM

2015-12-18T11:44:38-05:00

Capt Bob Abbott I avoid all social gatherings--hate shopping and won't do it unless it is absolutely necessary. I would ask them not to take offense,it really has nothing to do with them.

Response by SSG Warren Swan made Dec 18 at 2015 2:24 PM

2015-12-18T14:24:07-05:00

Man they suck. Santa hasn't brought me anything and that includes coal. Cheap bastard even takes the candy in my stockings. Whoever thought that whole "it's the thought" crap, hasn't been on the receiving end of seeing some fat man come down your chimney breaking half the bricks in the process, leaving some doggone socks, draws, and T-shirts. The socks are green, the drawers and t-shirts are tan, and he eats every damn thing in the kitchen as if I didn't want any of it. So I'll be glad when this season is over. I will be staying away from any and all fat "jolly" men who have the audacity to ask me while sitting on their laps what do it want? Did I mention the reindeer sh*t on the roof? Who do you think is gonna clean that mess up? I'm fat too, so I have to hire someone to do it and that's more money out of my pockets. So as a vet who suffers from PTSD Santa keep your fat a** off my roof this year. I'll leave the front door open so you can't break stuff, I'll leave you a few five day old Mickey D's double cheeseburgers (they don't spoil, and I have no idea why they're not a MRE staple), and a 40oz of Old English or a fifth of Fireball to hurry your butt up being you aren't dropping off anything different than last year. Hell you can even keep all the damn bills you saddle me with and take them back to the North Pole and have an elf pay em off. My New Years resolutions? I'm gonna do the same crap as last year so I can forecast the stupidity I'm gonna pull this summer in advance, and not break a single resolution. To the rest of y'all I hope Santa doesn't conduct breaching operations through your chimney, he doesn't conduct a personal taste test of all your food and liquor, and I hope you scare him off before he realizes the chocolate you gave him was actually Ex-lax and he gets the bubble guts.

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Dec 18 at 2015 4:26 PM

2015-12-18T16:26:52-05:00

not like they were, I now have a loving wife and new friends here in Indiana and amazingly, at the VFW...and hopefully, some new friends here on Rally Point, if anyone could please accept me or whatever here, I would like to have more friends here and in real life. Especially since I have ptsd, it is rather important to me. thanks in advance.

Response by SSG Jeff Binkiewicz made Dec 18 at 2015 5:46 PM

2015-12-18T17:46:56-05:00

Enjoy time with the family. Drink some beer, and get over it. Don't let it rule your life, don't use it as a crutch, move on with your life. Who doesn't suffer from some degree of PTSD. Seriously, life is to short.

Response by SFC Mark Bailey made Dec 19 at 2015 11:53 AM

2015-12-19T11:53:55-05:00

Christmas and New Years is always a special time for me...
I lost a lot of good friends over there and miss them very much still
For me, it is Valentines Day that is the toughest to get past since that was when the best of my friends crossed over in Iraq. He left a wife and two little boys behind and his loss hit me very hard.

I try not to let it affect me and always remember to raise a glass of my wife's best Mead (Honey Wine) over a bonfire in the backyard. If anyone asks, I will relate a few stories of David and we'll spend the rest of the night in muted conversation over things that happened and people we knew. Some of the stories are truly priceless and we often laugh until the middle of the night only to come across a story that silences the ring of people in the chairs.

But beyond that, I do my best to enjoy the time with those who are still around and those I never got to see that much while deployed over there....Wife & Kids.... Mom & Dad... and a close circle of friends who have seen better day, and days that were not as good as others...

I'd like to take this time to raise my Horn of Mead to each and every on of you out there with whatever level of PTSD by whatever name you may call it..... and to each and every one of you that has been away from your loved ones while protecting the rest of us out there on that thin line of Freedom we all call the US Military.

To all my Sisters and Brothers in Arms
Hail to each and every one of you

Response by PVT Mark Brown made Dec 10 at 2016 2:01 PM

2016-12-10T14:01:00-05:00

While in Korea for two consecutive Christmas seasons I only looked forward to Bob Hope, which I really enjoyed. For the few years my kids were young Christmas was fun but only in a material way. I know that Christmas is a celebration of the birth of our savior Jesus Christ. Other than that Christmas holds nothing for me. I find my self getting angry at this whole Christmas thing around end of November. I guess it would be save to say I hate christmas and get pretty depressed during this season. Christmas has morphed into a celebration of spending money. I am not one for large gathering. I am pretty reclusive anymore and just soon everyone leave me the fuck alone. There are some socially created demands placed on the shoulder of everyone whether you want to participate or not. I remember after coming home it was mandatory to attend Christmas dinner with about 20 family members that I see once (which was too often.) SO, suffice it to say, I hate Christmas.

Response by MAJ Ken Landgren made Dec 5 at 2021 10:05 PM

2021-12-05T22:05:18-05:00

I minimize what may give me stress.