The Lives We Remember on Memorial Day

2020-05-22T08:27:39-04:00

Every year our nation sets aside a day to honor our military who have died in service to our country. For many of us, this day is a tough one as we experience the full range of emotions. Our hearts are filled with great pride and great loss.

No matter how much time has passed, remembering can feel like waves in the ocean. Sometimes the waves of emotion are light and wash up against our ankles, however, there are times when those emotional waves crash into us hard and take our breath away.

Memorial Day impacts us all a little bit differently. I find myself on a roller coaster going from smiling to crying, thinking of the past and also what life might have been.

On Memorial Day, my wife and I join tens of thousands of military families across the United States to honor all our nation’s Fallen Heroes. We honor and remember our two sons who died fighting different battles.

Together with all of our fellow Americans, we honor over 677,000 members of the U.S. military who gave the ultimate sacrifice while bravely serving around the globe since the Civil War.

This Memorial Day, in particular, we are reminded of the fragility and sacredness of human life. In recent months, over 90,000 Americans have died from COVID-19 including over one thousand veterans.

Recent events also remind us that many of our military, both former and currently serving, are fighting to survive two different types of battles.

While many Americans continue social distancing or remain in self-isolation due to COVID-19, experts are warning of a surge in mental health issues. Not only is COVID-19 causing isolation, it also is tightening much needed resources for service members and veterans who rely on treatment for service related Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI).

Scarred by physical and emotional wounds, our veteran population already has a higher suicide rate than the national population, with a rate 1.5 times higher than civilians.

Many of our military and veterans are suffering from wounds you cannot see that can be more serious and deadly than the wounds you can see.

Unfortunately, our family has experienced the tragedy of suicide first-hand. As an ROTC cadet at the University of Kentucky, our son Kevin was studying to be an Army doctor. He was a scholarship student battling depression and stopped taking his medication because he didn’t want the military to know of his illness. When Kevin died, we blamed ourselves for not recognizing the serious warning signs that Kevin’s depression was a true medical illness and not just a sad feeling. We now know that eliminating the stigma and accessing quality treatment is a matter of life and death.

It was around the time of Kevin’s death that the military began experiencing crisis numbers of suicides on military installations where we served. My wife and I dedicated ourselves to opening up the conversation in both the military and civilian world about suicide.

As a retired Major General in the U.S. Army, my mission today is to ensure that any veteran, service member, family member, or caregiver gets the help they need, whenever they have an issue, wherever they are in the world -- before challenges turn into crises. They are not alone.

In many ways, our humble support of service members and veterans who suffer the invisible wounds of war is a way we can honor their comrades who fought and died.

This Memorial Day we respectfully remember with gratitude the hundreds of thousands of men and women who have served our country on the battlefield in countless wars and conflicts.

We remember over 7,000 post-9/11 troops, like our other son Jeff, who was killed by an IED leading a foot patrol in Iraq.

We remember the many generations before Jeff and Kevin who fought and died in the name of freedom.

Retired Army Maj. Gen. Mark Graham is director of Vets4Warriors. Veterans experiencing a mental health emergency can contact the Veteran Crisis Line at [login to see] and select option 1 for a VA staffer. If you want to speak with a peer, call Vets4Warriors at [login to see] , visit http://www.Vets4Warriors.com or follow us on social @Vets4Warriors to learn more.

Vets4Warriors

Vets4Warriors is a national 24/7-peer support network for veteran and military communities 100% staffed by trained veterans and members of the military community, their families or caregivers. We've been where you are and we’re with you now. Discover the power of connection.

Response by Lt Col Charlie Brown made May 22 at 2020 8:32 AM

2020-05-22T08:32:14-04:00

Thank you for this post. As a member of Victory for Veterans we join you in fighting that same battle. Veterans and Military can also contact the American Red Cross Hero Care Network for assistance. [login to see] or use the hero care network app

Response by SGT David A. 'Cowboy' Groth made May 22 at 2020 8:44 AM

2020-05-22T08:44:54-04:00

Thank you General, excellent picture share sir, thank you for your service and that of your relatives.

Response by SGM Bill Frazer made May 22 at 2020 12:05 PM

2020-05-22T12:05:02-04:00

Thank You Sir, roller coaster is right, and the isolation is just bunkering down- which is Hell for those of us with Depression and PTSD. But if we can stay in touch and join together we can hold off the demons. Sorry for your losses, and prayers for you, kitj and ken.

Response by Luke Rosenfeld made May 22 at 2020 3:45 PM

2020-05-22T15:45:30-04:00

Thank you for this share, sir.

Response by CWO3 Bryan Luciani made May 22 at 2020 4:37 PM

2020-05-22T16:37:21-04:00

Thank you for the post General. Even though I currently have two sons on active duty, I can't begin to imagine the scope of your loss and the sacrifices made by the Graham family. As I honor the shipmates, soldiers and Marines I've served with and have passed away, I will toast and honor your sons as well. God bless you sir.

Response by SSG Franklin Briant made May 22 at 2020 4:38 PM

2020-05-22T16:38:25-04:00

Great post. We all reflect, remember, and honor those who came before us and set us on the path we follow today. Thank you for your post.

Response by TSgt Robert Moore made May 22 at 2020 4:47 PM

2020-05-22T16:47:23-04:00

While your words sound good. They can't help me. I have tried to contact the VA repeatedly and here at Togus in Augusta, Maine, they don't give a damn about vets. I'm not the only one that has ran into their lack of concern. I have several friends up here that have the same issue. NO HELP FROM THE VA. DON"T WASTE YOUR TIME HERE.

Response by CPL Mark Newbold made May 22 at 2020 5:29 PM

2020-05-22T17:29:06-04:00

Thank you for your kind words sir. I have made it a routine to replace my Flag on Memorial Day each year at daybreak and take a moment to offer a short silent prayer to honor those that have made the ultimate sacrifice at the alter of freedom. This year I will reflect on what you have offered us in this post. Again, thank you sir for everything.

Response by MAJ Ken Landgren made May 22 at 2020 6:45 PM

2020-05-22T18:45:45-04:00

I knew two brothers in high school. They were a year apart. Both died a year apart in Iraq. Their parents had no other kids.

Response by MSG Norman Carter made May 22 at 2020 9:32 PM

2020-05-22T21:32:40-04:00

Sir,
Some gave all.
Only God saves.
Prayers for you and your family...

God is good!
Carter

Response by MSG Andrew White made May 22 at 2020 10:05 PM

2020-05-22T22:05:40-04:00

THANKS GENERAL FOR SHARING WITH US HERE AT RALLYPOINT!!!!

Response by LTC Kent Laudeman made May 23 at 2020 7:26 AM

2020-05-23T07:26:11-04:00

Many thanks for your thoughts and comments for Memorial Day.

Response by CPO William Rys made May 23 at 2020 8:23 AM

2020-05-23T08:23:54-04:00

Thank you for the perfectly worded post sir; you have my deepest condolences for your sacrifice.

As a military retiree for the last 30 years, I sometimes tend to focus on how successful I have been and how good life has been for us (no tragedies or life changing events, etc). I find it is very important to reflect on those who may be “suffering in silence”, and unable to cope with life as well as the rest of us.

Response by SGT John Graham made May 23 at 2020 8:53 AM

2020-05-23T08:53:42-04:00

Thank you General Graham for your continued service. I cannot imagine the pain felt on the loss of two sons. Our suicide rates are much higher than they should be; often due to the stigma of seeking mental health care. From personal experience I know others will look at you as weakened. I believe it takes much more strength to ask for help. We are supposed to be warriors capable of handling everything put in our way...but we are people. Many of us show a public face of strength, but it is only a mask. I became a career Police Officer after my military service. After sixteen years, I left the department I was with...it was time. One month later a former officer and friend died of a heart attack. He was 48 years old. At his funeral, I was a pariah, having quit: "couldn't hack it". That sentiment caused me to not be on the main floor. Ironically my friend had expressed the desire to get out but feared losing respect of his peers. As I sat in the balcony with my wife I saw many stoic, stiff faced brothers and sisters showing little emotion. Cops and soldiers don't cry, it's a sign of weakness. For the first time ever I cried hard...as a civilian. I still deal with Post Traumatic Stress, but I can see the sun most days. We need to remember our fallen, whether in combat, or other means.
NeOublai

Response by CPT Candice C. made May 23 at 2020 9:23 AM

2020-05-23T09:23:37-04:00

Thank you, sir, for sharing your painful experiences in order to help others find a way to heal. I honor your family's sacrifice--as well as those of countless others--on Memorial Day and always.

Response by CW5 John Vassar made May 23 at 2020 11:15 AM

2020-05-23T11:15:31-04:00

Thank you General ... The Military definitely needs to remove the stigma and unnecessary restrictions associated with Mental Illness. Psychological/Psychiatric-related issues are Diseases, not "Character-Defects". This form of discrimination denies us the contributions of some of our most intelligent and creative personnel. May the Creator grant you and your family Peace and Comfort.

Response by SGT Johnny Owens made May 23 at 2020 11:33 AM

2020-05-23T11:33:17-04:00

God bless America.

Response by SGT Johnny Owens made May 23 at 2020 11:40 AM

2020-05-23T11:40:22-04:00

My pride and stubbornness tried to kill me for years, I refused to ask for help even confronted with hopelessness and despair. Today I'm a member of a 12 step program that saved my life, and probably the lives of countless veterans. Coincidentally many of our members are also members of service organizations (The Legion, VFW, DAV, AMVETS...).

Response by SFC Raymond Torres made May 23 at 2020 2:00 PM

2020-05-23T14:00:59-04:00

Sir, thank you the share and above all, so sorry for your loss. It is humbling what we continue to face in and out of warfare and we need to continue to remember that it was NOT in vain but in the name of something greater than ALL of us. Sometimes it is too much for us us to handle and we forget that we could or should reach out and do not. On behalf of my family, and I am sure as well as the other military brothers-in-arms in this network and their supportive family, we offer our prayers to you and your family’s sacrifice as well as prayers for those who paid the ultimate sacrifice for freedom. God bless and thank you for sharing.

Response by COL Clifford Wheeler made May 23 at 2020 5:07 PM

2020-05-23T17:07:40-04:00

Thank you Sir for your continued service to our Troopers in their time of need.

Response by PFC Matthew Bean made May 23 at 2020 5:26 PM

2020-05-23T17:26:27-04:00

Our thoughts and prayers are with you this Memorial day general! I have served as an army veteran and have not seen the loss you have seen and I wish you and your family the best! I have just obtained a job in the veterans administration and I will do my best to serve each and each and every fellow veteran to the best of my abilities. I will be working out of the office of community Care within the veterans health administration and I hope that I will be able to serve up and honor the veterans that have giving their all for this country!

Response by SP5 John Anderson made May 23 at 2020 7:30 PM

2020-05-23T19:30:03-04:00

A Soldier's Thoughts

It Was Easier To Leave The Liberty That I Loved,
Than To Return To The Liberty I Lost.

As Long As One Person Acknowledges
My Life Sacrifices And Gains By It,

Then Shall The Sting Of Death Soften Its Grip
And Immortality And Honor
Be Given Its Rightful Name........

HERO....Then Shall I Rest.

Written By Larry Richardson And Presented To John P. Anderson 2005

Response by SP5 John Anderson made May 23 at 2020 7:31 PM

2020-05-23T19:31:15-04:00

Y all who have served and are serving...this poem belongs to you.

Response by SP5 John Anderson made May 23 at 2020 7:31 PM

2020-05-23T19:31:55-04:00

To all who have served and are serving...this poem belongs to you.

Response by SSG(P) D. Wright Downs made May 23 at 2020 9:04 PM

2020-05-23T21:04:07-04:00

Thank you for your words, General Graham. I am sorry for your losses. I am glad that you have taken up the baton to educate others regarding depression in the military. It is as real as another illness and it can also be treated. Many, including those who are diagnosed with it are not aware of the total picture and certainly their family members generally are not up on it. We have to do more for our best in the ranks…all ranks. There are so few who are qualified to serve and fewer yet who are willing to. They are a very important minority who we must take care of.

Response by SGT Glenn E Moody made May 24 at 2020 1:56 AM

2020-05-24T01:56:05-04:00

yes due to COVID-19 the Bourne cemetery Memorial Day service is canceled I have been doing it for the past 20+ years it is one of the things I love doing to pay respect to my fellow BROTHERS & SISTERS that have crossed the great Divide 3 of the biggest VETERAN events I enjoy APRIL the Salem muster in Salem MA. MAY MEMORIAL DAY & NOVEMBER VETERANS DAY both at BOURNE NATIONAL CEMETERY in BOURNE MA. hope everyone has A great safe weekend & remember it is not just A 3 day holiday weekend it is to pay respect to our fallen hero's MILITARY POLICE FIRE FIRST RESPODERS MAY THEY ALL REST IN PEACE MESSAGE FROM SGT OF ARMS 26th (YANKEE) INFANTRY DIVISION BOSTON MA. CHAPTER GLENN E MOODY

Response by SP5 Robert Ruck made May 24 at 2020 8:11 AM

2020-05-24T08:11:24-04:00

Thank you General. Depression is real and is not, repeat not a personality weakness. In remembrance of my brother Barry Ruck, March 29, 1980.

Response by SPC Michael Terrell made May 24 at 2020 9:29 AM

2020-05-24T09:29:14-04:00

Some gave all.

Response by TSgt Mark McAtee made May 24 at 2020 10:05 AM

2020-05-24T10:05:51-04:00

Thank you Sir for sharing your story with us. we remember the brothers and sisters we lost. Very sad day for me and others Semper Fi

Response by PFC Michael Korach made May 24 at 2020 10:51 AM

2020-05-24T10:51:27-04:00

MG Mark Graham thank you for the share and for all the work you do.

Response by 1SG Ernest Stull made May 24 at 2020 10:53 AM

2020-05-24T10:53:07-04:00

Sir thank you for that heartfelt memory and Loss that you and your family suffered. May your sons rest in peace.

Response by COL Private RallyPoint Member made May 24 at 2020 12:02 PM

2020-05-24T12:02:56-04:00

Amen.

Response by CAPT Barbara Ford made May 24 at 2020 12:10 PM

2020-05-24T12:10:40-04:00

Tough, touching words. Broke my heart to consider your loss, and pain. Thank you, Graham family. Your sacrifice and service inspire.

Response by SPC(P) Timeo Williams made May 24 at 2020 4:59 PM

2020-05-24T16:59:04-04:00

We remember those who have fallen.

Response by SGT James Murphy made May 24 at 2020 6:10 PM

2020-05-24T18:10:04-04:00

I put out my flag every Morning and Every Morning I Salute To Absent Friends Jim Price (I was the last one from Peshtigo to see him alive), John Rich (His Widow Gave Birth 1hr after my daughter was Born Same Hospital.) Steve Swatik, (Very Close Friend whose widow did not buy a headstone… We took up a collection!) So I salute them and remember them EVERY DAY! The NFL can KISS MY ASS!

My American Flag is Made in America. I Paid $10. More for it because it was
1. Made in America.
2. It has Embroidered Stars and still looks great after 10 years daily use!
Also...........................
I put out my flag every Morning and Every Morning I Salute To Absent Friends Jim Price (I was the last one from Peshtigo to see him alive), John Rich (His Widow Gave Birth 1hr after my daughter was Born Same Hospital.) Steve Swatike, (Very Close Friend whose widow did not buy a headstone… We took up a collection!) So I salute them and remember them EVERY DAY! The NFL can KISS MY ASS!

Response by Lt Col Warren Domke made May 24 at 2020 7:10 PM

2020-05-24T19:10:41-04:00

When I first became a member of the Armed Forces--as a New Mexico Air National Guardsman--the percentage of American men who were veterans was much higher than the tiny percentage it is today. I went on to serve on active duty as an Air Force officer and continued as a Reserve officer to amass a total of 31 years service. During that time the veteran percentage has declined dramatically, partly due to the dwindling numbers of World War II and Korea veterans, but simply because fewer men and women have served. In this changed climate, remembering our veterans, especially those who have been damaged by their service, is an obligation for all Americans. It is an obligation too often ignored or forgotten. Memorial Day is a special day to remember those with the greatest needs, but every day should be a memorial day. Thank you for the reminders and my condolences for the sons you have lost. May they rest in peace and honor.

Response by 1SG Charles Griffin made May 24 at 2020 10:14 PM

2020-05-24T22:14:21-04:00

Thank you for these great words sir. So many times all you hear about Memorial Day is the mattress and cars sales. As a 24 year veteran the meaning of Memorial Day hit hard when at 05:00hrs on the 16th of September 2019 we was notified that our son was killed in action in Afghanistan.

Response by CSM Charles Hayden made May 24 at 2020 10:31 PM

2020-05-24T22:31:31-04:00

MG Mark Graham You are not alone General. Many of us are having a ‘bad’ weekend.

The last time I went to my brother’s grave site in the West Los Angeles National Cemetery on Memorial Day became a never again moment!

Response by SPC Dwight Turner made May 24 at 2020 10:41 PM

2020-05-24T22:41:55-04:00

i know myself having lost my brother-in-law to veit nam that hit home for me and i was young seeing them bringing notice to my sister !!!! i watched as she broke down and cried !!!!!being younger i didnt know what happened !!!!! then seeing his flag in a case and medals sister sat down told me what happened !!!! till this day even being a veteran its hard right now during pandemic i have several veterans living in high rise being on different floors we try to look after each other maybe this is god's mission ??
some say it is i dont know if it is i wish it heal up !!!! bad enough i suffer from bipolar1 and emontional depression the stay at home doesnt bother me !!!! heck i get out if lucky 3 maybe 4 times a week walking keeps me in shape just a couple of blocks i just wont tolerate alot any more
till then i pray those who can take time in laying flowers if you can i looked seen my sister did for mom and dads grave site !!beautiful even has flags around
dad always said " i love my country i fear those who run it and live in it "

Response by CPT Aaron Kletzing made May 24 at 2020 11:08 PM

2020-05-24T23:08:27-04:00

Wow, beautiful and very moving words here. Thank you for sharing your story, Sir.

Response by AB Edward Mondini made May 25 at 2020 9:57 AM

2020-05-25T09:57:45-04:00

Thank you, MG Graham & wife, Carol, for this post. I am humbled & honored by your words, your devotion to your sons, Kevin and Jeffrey and your steadfast, courageous commitment to the mental health of our nation’s soldiers & veterans.

Response by Sgt Jim Mullins made May 25 at 2020 10:44 AM

2020-05-25T10:44:20-04:00

Thanks

Response by PO1 Private RallyPoint Member made May 25 at 2020 10:45 AM

2020-05-25T10:45:27-04:00

Thank you, General for your wonderful heart-felt post. In recent years I have often worn a cap identifying myself as a Vietnam veteran, especially since I noticed it sometimes resulted in another Veteran identifying himself to me who might be having problems. It's best to be kind to everyone as you usually can't tell what a person is going through.

Response by SP5 Harold Steinholz made May 25 at 2020 11:40 AM

2020-05-25T11:40:49-04:00

Thank you so much for your words on this Memorial Day. On this day I think of the friends I made in the Service. .I still correspond with several of them via the Internet & Facebook. Sorry for your loss , Sir and may you continue your work for Veterans

Response by GySgt John Hudson made May 25 at 2020 6:49 PM

2020-05-25T18:49:46-04:00

I thank you for this post and I help local veterans who call for help. I also work with some homeless vets who have lost their way.. I grieve for those lost at home and abroad.. Some were family and friends and some were fellow servicemen and women. Semper Fidelis to all my fellow Americans.. JP

Response by SGT Lenise Hamilton made May 25 at 2020 7:47 PM

2020-05-25T19:47:44-04:00

"We must never ever forget our fallen and continue to push forward for those who are serving".

Response by MAJ Hugh Blanchard made May 26 at 2020 12:47 AM

2020-05-26T00:47:19-04:00

Sir: Very sorry to learn this. I think about the soldiers I lost every single day, so I understand. But losing sons must be something else entirely. Thanks to you and your family for your service and sacrifice. As Abraham Lincoln said long ago, there must be a solemn pride in having laid so costly a sacrifice on the altar of freedom.
Very Sincerely,
Hugh

Response by MSG Avery Wiggins made May 26 at 2020 9:40 AM

2020-05-26T09:40:00-04:00

Sir,

Thank you for those kind words and sharing your and your wife's experience. As a veteran, I value the assistance that is offered to us and ultimately, it's up to us the get the care we may need. Yes, it is a roller coaster ride at times, when we think and honor those that have served and are still serving.
Thank you,
Avery Wiggins (MSG Ret)

Response by LTC Private RallyPoint Member made May 26 at 2020 12:17 PM

2020-05-26T12:17:34-04:00

Thanks, Sir.

Response by MAJ Byron Oyler made May 26 at 2020 2:38 PM

2020-05-26T14:38:49-04:00

Sir, I still have young children and I worry about how I influence my children in taking up some of the dangerous jobs I have done, from being a soldier to firefighter. As someone who has lost a child following your footsteps, how do you cope and do you have any advice for someone potentially wearing the same shoes? I worry about my children following me and then dealing with losing them in that job I played a part.

Response by 1stSgt Private RallyPoint Member made May 26 at 2020 9:14 PM

2020-05-26T21:14:23-04:00

A truly awesome post that covers the range of emotions that I have every year at this time. Your insight is appreciated. Thank you. Semper Fidelis.

Response by CWO3 Private RallyPoint Member made May 27 at 2020 8:01 AM

2020-05-27T08:01:09-04:00

Such as Regiments hand down forever. Selflessness and sacrifice for the benefit of others and the unit.

Response by PO1 Private RallyPoint Member made May 27 at 2020 3:02 PM

2020-05-27T15:02:00-04:00

Can some one tell me where this cemetery is the reason I know someone with the same family name

Response by SSG Christopher Parrish made May 27 at 2020 4:37 PM

2020-05-27T16:37:32-04:00

Great words, thank you sir. Each year I participate in fund raising for Carry the Load and 22Kill. I am humbled by the men and women I am surrounded by during the culmination of the events at the Dallas Memorial March each year.

I carry SSG Brian Craig and keep his name and memory alive by my partnership with Carry the Load.

Response by SGT Tony Long made May 28 at 2020 8:40 PM

2020-05-28T20:40:55-04:00

GOD bless you General. Thank you for your kindness and care for your fellow veterans.

Response by GySgt John Hudson made May 28 at 2020 8:54 PM

2020-05-28T20:54:47-04:00

I am profoundly sorry for your loss. As a fellow member of a gold star family, I can feel your pain and loss as well. Blessed be the warrior who serves the nation, tribe, clan, family, for he truly has love in his heart for those around him. I lost a true friend who was with me in conversation one moment and gone the next to a sniper... I have also lost family members to terrorism while serving as peacekeepers. On Memorial day and just about any other day. I remember them as I knew them and I pray for them as they sit with God while awaiting the reunion we will have when God calls me. You and your wife will see your sons again when God calls you. Strive to help those who need our help and remember the good of those gone before us.. God bless you brother... Gunns/JP

Response by Sgt Jim Mullins made May 29 at 2020 8:00 AM

2020-05-29T08:00:05-04:00

My brother USMC Cpl. George W. Mullins died due to wounds while serving in Vietnam. He had two purple hearts and other medals. I served before my younger brother in the USMC. I had one purple heart. I served with a lot of brave Marines dedicated to the USA. Semper Fi

Response by Susan Davis Stewart made Jun 10 at 2020 1:25 PM

2020-06-10T13:25:53-04:00

Thank you Mark and your wife. May God bless you in your new mission. I am terribly sad you lost two sons. Susan Davis Stewart

Response by Pvt SanJuana Méndez made Jun 30 at 2020 11:42 AM

2020-06-30T11:42:02-04:00

MG Graham, there wz a time when Memorial Day wz a day for friends & family to get together, either for a day of fishing or for a cookout. That, of course, wz before I became a Marine. For several yrs after I served & before I learned I could call myself a veteran (only served 79 days but wz honorably discharged), I erroneously honored my husband for having served entire term he signed on for. My circumstances didn't provide me opportunity to learn military history or protocol, so it wzn't 'til nearly 21 yrs ago that I actually learned real purpose of celebrating Memorial Day.

As time progressed, I felt need to honor those brave men & women who were KIA. Eventually, I began including veterans to had come to EOW, more so as I became aware of those who made ultimate sacrifice on battlefield & hadn't come to EOW 'til yrs after they came home. I've become more public about this in past 10.5 yrs, posting ever-growing list commemorating fallen heroes & EOWers on Facebook. Among EOWs I listed my 2d husband who died before social media, my 1st husband who died 2 yrs ago & most recently, my 3d & final husband (my forever husband, who told me from day one of nearly 16 yrs we were together that he wz Vietnam combat veteran & former POW) who died 9 Aug 2019.

I've followed pandemic we're experiencing since Facebook started keeping us up to date. I wz incensed last month, few days before Memorial Day weekend, when I read President Trump's mandate that all federal & government establishments should fly flags half-mast on Memorial day! Prior to his edict, I had brought my flag out of storage to fly at half-mast to honor my forever husband on Memorial Day. Wz so irate that I wz tempted NOT to fly it at all. I couldn't see myself commemorating people whose death IMO he is responsible for, of all days, on a day that has been dedicated to our military heroes for 155 yrs. I fought my feelings, tho, & hoisted my flag as planned.

Response by SGT Lorenzo Nieto made Feb 25 at 2021 9:33 AM

2021-02-25T09:33:52-05:00

I will never forget my fallen brothers,for they’re my true heroes.

Response by Capt Edward Egan made May 29 at 2021 3:59 PM

2021-05-29T15:59:06-04:00

General Graham, thank you for your service and the service and sacrifice of your sons. As Lincoln wrote to Mrs. Bixby (in part): "I pray that our Heavenly Father may assuage the anguish of your bereavement, and leave you only the cherished memory of the loved and lost, and the solemn pride that must be yours to have laid so costly a sacrifice upon the altar of Freedom."

On Memorial Day as every other day, I remember the lives and the sacrifice of all my friends who gave their lives in Vietnam, and all those before or since. When I got back from the dedication of the Vietnam Memorial ("The Wall") in 1982 I wrote this:

THE VIETNAM MEMORIAL

In mirror-polished stone
I see myself reflected:
A magic image stretching far
From idealistic innocence
To the I who am today.

Graven names this mirror mar,
A record of the souls who gave.
Who died in daring:
Left me to live
And mourn them.

I never got to say goodbye
In life or at your grave:
You fell and were then lifted home,
While my tears were swept away
In the whirlwind of the battle.

Now, at last, I bid you bye,
And thanks for all you braved;
All my brothers, listed here:
We lesser men came home, but you
Are enshrined in solemn glory.