There is respect and then there is respect

LTC Hillary Luton — Mon, 18 Aug 2014 11:13:46 -0400

Throughout my career I have found that there are two types of respect in the military. There is the respect we receive based on the rank we wear. Then there is the respect we earn based on our character and actions. What are your thoughts?

Response by SFC Mark Merino made Aug 19 at 2014 3:37 AM

SFC Mark Merino — Tue, 19 Aug 2014 03:37:01 -0400

Good question. I love the scene in Band of Brothers when MAJ Winters gets to run into his arch-nemesis and previous CPT Commander who tries walking by with contempt and no salute. It was proof that what comes around goes around. We have all been absolutely amazed by the mysterious inner workings of those above us that shouldn't be trusted with handing out the mail, let alone leading troops. There always seems to be that special "go to" person who is wise beyond their years, yet gets shoulder pains from being at parade rest to said wonder doofus. We just try to not bite our tongues off and hope to PCS without letting the truth come out.

Response by MAJ Robert (Bob) Petrarca made Aug 19 at 2014 6:33 AM

MAJ Robert (Bob) Petrarca — Tue, 19 Aug 2014 06:33:11 -0400

Very true ma'am, the latter being the toughest to achieve. Rank is apparent and respecting what someone wears on their uniform, or the position they hold in the organization goes with the territory. But as you point out, its what we say and do that earns us respect as a person, regardless of the rank. Earning respect among peers, seniors and subordinates as a person is IMHO much more important than the rank respect because it also earns you the trust, confidence and camaraderie that bonds you to the members your organization and makes the organization as a whole that much stronger.
Facta Probant - Deeds Prove Us.

Response by 1LT Nick Kidwell made Aug 19 at 2014 7:54 AM

1LT Nick Kidwell — Tue, 19 Aug 2014 07:54:08 -0400

Agreed, and frankly, I preferred earning the latter.

Response by 1SG Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 19 at 2014 8:00 AM

1SG Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 19 Aug 2014 08:00:45 -0400

Great topic! The first respect (that towards a specific rank) is just that, respect. The second type of respect (based on character and actions) also encompasses trust and loyalty.

To be able to gain the trust, loyalty and respect of another human being based solely off your leadership is priceless. The bonds that you will build and form with those Soldiers is also one that neither of you will likely forget.

Response by SFC A.M. Drake made Aug 19 at 2014 8:15 AM

SFC A.M. Drake — Tue, 19 Aug 2014 08:15:47 -0400

maam,

You touched a raw nerve here and it's very good to discuss this issue as I believe it's the foundation of everything else we are in the military no matter what branch...it is earned however some leaders says my rank is what you should respect instead of the person behind the uniform...:-). We all have seen and heard the news reports regarding leaders and their lapse in judgement and or cognitive abilities to separate fact from fiction. However I have found that the military is a microcosm of society....you had good bad and in between. I would rather have a leader that is fair and impartial than a micromanager of what's best for me type attitude. my .02...maam good topic I look forward to reading others on this subject.

Response by SFC Patrick Smith made Aug 19 at 2014 12:13 PM

SFC Patrick Smith — Tue, 19 Aug 2014 12:13:16 -0400

We have / had a saying in the Rangers and that was "The tab doesn't make the man, the man makes the tab". We show proper customs and courtesy when we salute our officers and stand at parade rest when addressing or being addressed by an NCO. A line from "Down Parascope" a Navy comedy came to mind. The Admiral says to the renegade sub commander, that he was being addressed by a "superior" officer. The sub commander replies "No, mearly a higher "ranking" one.... Again, in the military respect has to be earned as well as being instilled as a common core system of the established command.... Units that figured this our are much more effective with peacetime and combat roles / operations. ... Just an old combat Medic / Ranger's two cents. ..

Response by SrA Cecil Brown made Aug 19 at 2014 12:36 PM

SrA Cecil Brown — Tue, 19 Aug 2014 12:36:21 -0400

You are exactly correct on this. I've encountered many Senior NCOs and Officers and some where good people with good personality in which I had no problems respecting and saluting (if officer). Then you had some I had to show proper customs and courtesies towards due to rank but deep down I wanted to punch them. You have artificial respect and genuine respect.

Response by CPO Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 19 at 2014 3:33 PM

CPO Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 19 Aug 2014 15:33:46 -0400

Rank has to be respected, but character doesn't. To me, respect of the rank, while expected as part of the military, plays second-fiddle to the respect your character earns you as a leader.

Rank "respect" is paygrade; real RESPECT is influence. And that's all leadership is: Influence.

Response by SSgt Gregory Guina made Aug 19 at 2014 5:37 PM

SSgt Gregory Guina — Tue, 19 Aug 2014 17:37:35 -0400

Ma'am
I can't argue that one at all because htere are plenty of times that I have dealt with someone that was wearing a rank that was completely incompetent at what they were doing. I definitely did not respoect the person but I had to respect the rank.

Response by MSG Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 19 at 2014 6:43 PM

MSG Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 19 Aug 2014 18:43:33 -0400

Ma'am,

I believe that there is a misconception in the Military when it comes to the word "Respect". I do not believe anyone respects rank (it's an inanimate object). I think soldiers extend courtesy to those that out rank them and it's perceived as Respect. While I feel courtesy goes both ways (this is learned while a child but forgotten by most adults). I also feel that RESPECT is earned, by the CHARACTER of the of the person and not the rank or position they hold. With that said there are numerous of Leaders that soldiers have the utmost respect for, while I am sure that everyone knows some that although they are in a position of authority you feel no respect for them at all.