Transgendered/Gay/Lesbian service members, what is your experience in the military like?

2016-03-22T18:10:11-04:00

I would like to hear what its like to be a part of the LGBT community in our nations military. anything really positive ever come out of it? anything really negative? have you ever been discriminated against or been treated unfairly? whats your story?

Response by MSG James Crowell made Mar 22 at 2016 6:13 PM

2016-03-22T18:13:11-04:00

i was rape by three men who saw me with a friends girlfriend kissing and i was told if i said any thing about it i would be throw out of the Army back when the ban was on back in the 1980s at Fort Campbell KY

Response by MSG James Crowell made Mar 22 at 2016 9:24 PM

2016-03-22T21:24:04-04:00

http://thinkprogress.org/lgbt/2016/03/22/3762490/kansas-transgender-ransom-bathrooms/ is this what we want for the people in the USA if so i will be leaving the USA because that is not what the USA was and i believe still not what the USA is now

Kansas Bill Would Pay Students A $2,500 Bounty To Hunt For Trans People In Bathrooms

Kansas is now on deck to be the first state to pass a sweeping anti-transgender bill.

Response by Cpl Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 22 at 2016 10:12 PM

2016-03-22T22:12:22-04:00

I can honestly tell you, I don't care, we had a guy who was gay. We did our jobs but we're family. We laughed about it and cared for each other. At the end of the day we together in some dull situations

Response by SGT Michael Thorin made Mar 22 at 2016 10:15 PM

2016-03-22T22:15:58-04:00

I will make this comment, and I make it without reserve as a Christian.

My job is not to judge any person. There are many lifestyles which I do not agree are in keeping with my particular faith, but thankfully, for myself and everyone else, I do not pass judgement, my job is to treat everyone as an equal, with love and charity.

That being said, any individual who has ever signed on the dotted line and stood up to defend this great Country is a brother to me.

I don't mean brother in the "male gender" sense, I mean brother as in an equal, a warrior who has decided to be a part of something bigger than themselves.

MSG Crowell, I appreciate your service, as I do all of my other brothers and sisters in arms.

I will never be able to understand the pain that you went through, nor could I begin to imagine.

Your brothers in arms failed you, and no one will be able to apologize enough to even begin the healing process.

To all of my comrades in arms, every single one of you, no matter what race, religion, sexual preference, nationality or gender; all of use deserve the same level of treatment or respect.

Response by TSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 23 at 2016 9:10 PM

2016-03-23T21:10:51-04:00

I have almost 13 years in, and enlisted when DADT was the rule. I was 17 at the time, and hadn't really figured myself out (even though I knew I liked guys, I always figured I'd still find a wife eventually).

Being career National Guard, I had it easier in a lot of ways. I could usually pass off my awkwardness as just being away from home.

The hardest part I had was when my partner of six years left me shortly after I was slotted for Iraq. Dealing with depression, while not being able to talk to anyone (the Div chaplain essentially told me to pray the gay away). I honestly spent nights contemplating eating my sidearm.

Since DADT fell out, things have been quite good. I'm out to my unit, no one cares (though I'm told money changed hands weekend I came out), and I don't feel like I'm any less part of the team.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Mar 25 at 2016 1:43 PM

2016-03-25T13:43:08-04:00

OK, I serve in a multiservice school. We have had numerous openly homosexual trainees, and we have recently had our first transgendered service member, and know that we have more coming in the future. I can honestly tell you that we don't care. When we find out that someone is LGBT, we usually say something like: "good for you, now get back to work."

90% of the problems in the military originate in one of two places: someone thinks they are special and can do whatever they want, or someone is intolerant of someone else and also thinks they can do whatever they want.

ten years ago kids were claiming they were various pagan religions to get attention in basic. Some were legitimate, some weren't. I didn't care, there was work to do.

Nobody should be ashamed to be themselves, but nobody deserves a cookie for being themselves either. Earn your damn cookies like the rest of us.

Response by SPC Adriel Martinez made May 31 at 2016 2:14 AM

2016-05-31T02:14:50-04:00

Not as bad as it could have been I suppose, but then again being inside the closet most of the time helped.

Response by MAJ Keira Brennan made May 21 at 2017 11:55 AM

2017-05-21T11:55:32-04:00

I spent the last 12yrs of my career in the Reserves with Active Duty jaunts in EUCOM, OEF, etc and retired just before DADT was repealed. Being in the closet SUCKED. There was (as I am sure it always has been) a thriving closeted LGB (not sure about TQ) community in the service EVERYWHERE I was. I always felt compromised and stayed somewhat stealth.

Response by WO1 Private RallyPoint Member made May 31 at 2017 12:08 PM

2017-05-31T12:08:03-04:00

I joined in '07. Hearing all the 'bro talk' really never bothered me. I was open in the military from day one, I guess nobody ever had the notion to report me for it. Never really faced any discrimination I couldn't counter with civil conversation or a walk behind the woodshed.

I often hear that I'm the "Most straight gay guy they've met." I wear that proudly, because it's just who I happen to be. Me being gay never really defined me, nor did it give to me a measure by which to act around others. The goal was always to be an individual, rather than whatever role I played in the company I kept.

Response by SGT Lisa Fields made Aug 6 at 2018 5:54 PM

2018-08-06T17:54:44-04:00

The last few years of service we're the best years of my career. Started transition before we shipped over seas came out after it was obvious something was up. (Black PT uniform don't hide shit)
Did my job no one batted an eye. Tho the random hugs from random soldiers not under my command and comments of support were uncomfortable I don't like physical contact with people or emotional displays.

Response by SSG Diane R. made Dec 21 at 2018 5:30 PM

2018-12-21T17:30:49-05:00

A very long and complicated story that would be.