Violence and Bad Parenting in Youth Sports

SGT Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 27 May 2015 10:41:50 -0400

I ask this because this is something that has happened fairly recently. You know, us coaches can't make all of the "Parents" happy. (It should be how we make all of the kiddos. Although, that sometimes doesn't happen either.)

I am growing tired of parents yelling at their children while they are on the field. 8 and under y'all. 8. I actually had to tell moms and dad to be quiet. For the umpire to jump in as well, you know it was pretty loud.

I cannot express enough how important it is to let your kiddos know that no matter win or lose, bad or good grade, the most important thing is that they tried their best. My daughter will tell you. If she tried her best and that was her very best, it doesn't matter the grade, I will not be upset. (unless it happens you know like 5 times in a row or something and then we know she is using moms.) It doesn't matter if she didn't catch that ball, or throw that strike, or didn't tag the girl. They are too young still right now and they are still learning the mechanics.

A mom text me yesterday b/c our team had to reschedule PICTURE day (no we had no game or anything.) b/c all of the players were not going to be there. On and on and on. Glad it was text. In person might've been something different.

Anyways, have you experienced any of these Cray Cray Parents? If you have experienced the Cray Cray Parents, how did you respond? Are you the Cray Cray Parent?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MiHSzpKEt90

Response by LTC Private RallyPoint Member made May 27 at 2015 10:42 AM

LTC Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 27 May 2015 10:42:55 -0400

Unfortunately some parents see this as there ticket to retirement. I lived down south for many years and it drove us crazy to see parents basically fighting over playing time. What a mess!

Response by 1LT Nick Kidwell made May 27 at 2015 10:55 AM

1LT Nick Kidwell — Wed, 27 May 2015 10:55:01 -0400

In my city, my son played Parks & Rec soccer for years before he was old enough to play for the local HS team. In order to attend his games, we had to take classes which supposedly trained us not to be the typical angry "soccer parents." Wasn't a problem for my family, but I did see a couple times when parents were out of line.

As a soccer coach, I actually saw a coach "red carded" because of his comportment on the sidelines.

Yeah, it's kids' sports, but realize that some of these parents are living vicariously through their kids and are quite invested. It's not RIGHT, but it happens.

Response by Capt Mark Strobl made May 27 at 2015 11:04 AM

Capt Mark Strobl — Wed, 27 May 2015 11:04:23 -0400

Unfortunately, some parents get in the way of an otherwise great game. I guess we all want to go home a winner. But, there are tremendous lessons in watching a team, even if its your team, demonstrate dignity in the loss.

Coaches coach;
Players play;
and parents should cheer from a mile away!

Response by Capt Richard I P. made May 27 at 2015 11:08 AM

Capt Richard I P. — Wed, 27 May 2015 11:08:41 -0400

I prefer to be friendly, if I cannot.
I support civility.
I oppose hostility.
I strongly oppose imitation of force, and will meet it with equal or slightly escalated force.
I will teach my child to do the same.

Response by CPT Bob Moore made May 27 at 2015 11:18 AM

CPT Bob Moore — Wed, 27 May 2015 11:18:57 -0400

I've coached several sports, both as a volunteer coach and a paid coach. I coached 5 year olds playing basketball all the way to high school football. I have seen a lot of craziness.

I learned early in my coaching career to set the expectations early for the parents. I have actually had very young kids pulled off of my team by the parents because the parents didn't like those expectations.

I have always allowed parents to ask me questions as long as they did not do it in front of the team. As a coach (or in any leadership position, for that matter), I should be able to explain why I am doing what I am doing. If kid A plays more than kid B, as a coach I should know why and be able to explain that. Sometimes that parents don't like my answer, but at least I can explain it.

Response by WO1 Private RallyPoint Member made May 27 at 2015 11:26 AM

WO1 Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 27 May 2015 11:26:42 -0400

Children's sports are serious!
If I ever have kids they will compete for my love through sports!
Rabble rabble rabble!

Or not.

Response by CSM Charles Hayden made May 27 at 2015 8:47 PM

CSM Charles Hayden — Wed, 27 May 2015 20:47:12 -0400

Actions like that make me ashamed to live on the same planet as the gross parent in the video clip.

Response by CCMSgt Michael Sullivan Ph.D made May 29 at 2015 10:59 PM

CCMSgt Michael Sullivan Ph.D — Fri, 29 May 2015 22:59:36 -0400

I was a very good baseball player in high school but got kicked out of a lot of games for arguing with the umpire.
It was'nt till after I stoped playing and became a umpire that I learned, I would not change my mind even if I was wrong.
Most times after the game I went up to the player and saiid I might have been wrong and would try harder the next game.