Was it really his fault or was it the sin's fault?

CPT Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 22 Aug 2015 12:23:56 -0400

Just as I have aforementioned here on RP I don't confirm to many of the traditional beliefs that most Christians adhere too. Now I digress.

This follow was caught on the Ashley Madison hack. He was a Christian Vlogger so I would tend to think he should have a good understanding how his faith system works. He had an account with the intent of going out of his way to meet women to have an affair while his wife just gave birth. Now what I don't understand he proclaims it wasn't his fault. Some how his flesh acted on it's own and did it. It wasn't him. But now that he told on his flesh he is good now.

My issue with this is that we all make mistakes to varying degrees. Some of use don't put the toilet seat down and some like this go pay to have an account to have an affair. But he did it. How can you blame something else. You should be blaming yourself. It is your flesh. You can't somehow be taken over by some other sinful entity and act on it against your will. It sounds like some sort of possession. This is what I don't understand. To me it is like a criminal that murdered someone saying "It wasn't me it was the rage. Now that I said the rage did it I should be free to go!" I don't think that is how it is supposed to work. It seems like a flawed system to me. He is talking is admitting his fault but is talking no responsibility for it. I am all about forgiveness and marriages should be something that we should fight for but they just seem a bit delusional to me. To him now he is cleansed. Maybe he should figure out if he really wants to be married. Something made him want to step out on his marriage.

Christian vlogger says wife forgives him for Ashley Madison account

In a new YouTube video, Sam Rader, from Terrell, Texas, admits he 'sinned' by setting up an account on Ashley Madison two years ago. However, he says his wife and God have now forgiven him.

Response by COL Charles Williams made Aug 22 at 2015 12:25 PM

COL Charles Williams — Sat, 22 Aug 2015 12:25:33 -0400

It is a sin, and you are responsible. Plain and simple. Will the lord forgive you, or your wife, that is between you and the lord and your wife. CPT Private RallyPoint Member

Response by CW4 Guy Butler made Aug 22 at 2015 12:26 PM

CW4 Guy Butler — Sat, 22 Aug 2015 12:26:41 -0400

Reminds me of "The Devil made me do it" t-shirts...

Response by MSgt Curtis Ellis made Aug 22 at 2015 12:48 PM

MSgt Curtis Ellis — Sat, 22 Aug 2015 12:48:31 -0400

Just saying...

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 22 at 2015 1:09 PM

CPT Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 22 Aug 2015 13:09:26 -0400

Excuses, excuses, excuses. He got caught with his pants down and came up with a lie he thought his wife would accept. She is probably a religious person, but I don't think she is that dumb. More than likely caught between a rock and a hard place, just giving birth, she scared to death she will lose the the father of her child.
He on the other hand is a POS, and needs to be exterminated. He's trying to relieve himself of responsibility by saying, "the devil made me do it". He is just trying to "pull the wool over" her eyes. The as***le doesn't deserve forgiveness from his wife, God is another story.

Response by SSgt Terry P. made Aug 22 at 2015 1:34 PM

SSgt Terry P. — Sat, 22 Aug 2015 13:34:15 -0400

Chickens**t jerk.

Response by SFC Michael Hasbun made Aug 22 at 2015 1:43 PM

SFC Michael Hasbun — Sat, 22 Aug 2015 13:43:53 -0400

Nonsense. He's a flawed human being. Just like every other human being whose ever lived... There's nothing we love more than standing on imaginary pedestals throwing stones...

Response by MAJ Ken Landgren made Aug 22 at 2015 1:55 PM

MAJ Ken Landgren — Sat, 22 Aug 2015 13:55:24 -0400

If in fact his actions are not of his volition, then we need to kick him out for random acts he has no control over :)

Response by SGT Christopher Churilla made Aug 22 at 2015 2:12 PM

SGT Christopher Churilla — Sat, 22 Aug 2015 14:12:19 -0400

My mother has a saying: "You make a mess, you clean the mess." To me it means take responsibility for your actions, good and bad.

Now however this guy wants to explain the cause of his infidelity, and if he wants to believe that his God has forgiven him, that's his business.

But I believe every action we take is a decision on our part, whether conscious or unconscious, and to put the blame completely on outside forces is not taking responsibility for it. That to me says he has weakness of character, and I wouldn't be surprised if he--or his flesh--does this again.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 22 at 2015 3:35 PM

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Sat, 22 Aug 2015 15:35:17 -0400

Using your belief to manufacture excuses for odious behavior. Great example, there, hoss.

Response by SGT Forrest Stewart made Aug 22 at 2015 3:37 PM

SGT Forrest Stewart — Sat, 22 Aug 2015 15:37:00 -0400

It is a sin. He's the one that committed that sin. He's the only one to possibility be blamed for that sin. He needs to take responsibility for his actions and stop trying to shift blame to anyone or anything else...

Response by SFC Mark Merino made Aug 22 at 2015 3:38 PM

SFC Mark Merino — Sat, 22 Aug 2015 15:38:10 -0400

Hypocrisy exists in every religion. He claims the title of Christian, but his actions speak for themselves. Just like all these shenanigans we are having with the Muslim community. They can throw their religion around and claim righteousness, but their actions speak volumes. I just wish the Muslim community would get off their butt with the negative press and do something about their own problems. We are responsible for our own actions. Sin is an action. The individual has free will to take action. That is like blaming those pigs at Ashley Madison for their adultery.

Response by LTJG Robert M. made Aug 22 at 2015 6:06 PM

LTJG Robert M. — Sat, 22 Aug 2015 18:06:57 -0400

God gave man the Ability to choose, this individual chose the Sin, he is guilty of it, it was his action. That said, God will forgive the sin, if he owns it and repents.

Response by LCDR Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 23 at 2015 12:16 AM

LCDR Private RallyPoint Member — Sun, 23 Aug 2015 00:16:49 -0400

Unfortunately this is someone using (or rather attempting to use) this religion as an excuse. If he were actually a good Christian he would be remorseful and perhaps ask forgiveness instead of blaming his actions on a convenient lie.

Response by SFC Joseph Weber made Aug 23 at 2015 3:24 AM

SFC Joseph Weber — Sun, 23 Aug 2015 03:24:10 -0400

Playing the sin card is a pile of BS.

Response by MAJ Ken Landgren made Aug 23 at 2015 12:31 PM

MAJ Ken Landgren — Sun, 23 Aug 2015 12:31:29 -0400

Just blame it on his autonomous penis.

Response by PO2 Corey Ferretti made Aug 23 at 2015 12:34 PM

PO2 Corey Ferretti — Sun, 23 Aug 2015 12:34:29 -0400

Okay so I read the article and I belive this was the part you were citing. "He adds that both his spouse and God have forgiven him for his actions, which were driven by 'pure fleshly desire and sinful curiosity'. 'So I've been completely cleansed of this sin,' he insists." The article was pretty Vauge on his video blog/confession so i can't tell wither he really took responsibility or Shirley it. But what he did was what he stated it was fleshly desire and a sin. And he is right as long as he has asked for forgiveness with his whole heart and means it he is forgiven. That does not stop the fall out of his actions. In the book of John Jesus was brought a women caught in adultery. They were wanting him to stone her. Instead he said those with out sin cast first stone. They left he turned to her and said. Now go and sin no more. So if he goes back to doing it all over again the he has fallen short of the father.

Response by CW5 Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 23 at 2015 1:05 PM

CW5 Private RallyPoint Member — Sun, 23 Aug 2015 13:05:43 -0400

He evidently doesn't get it. Neither does his wife or she would leave his sorry butt in the dust.

Response by SSG Warren Swan made Aug 24 at 2015 9:12 AM

SSG Warren Swan — Mon, 24 Aug 2015 09:12:39 -0400

Please. YOU did it. The keyboard didn't "posses" you, Ashley Madison's site didn't badger you, and there was no one at your door telling you that you had to do this at gunpoint. YOU made a conscious decision, backed with your hands and credit card and made an account. Own up to it and move on. If need be, repent to your wife and God. But in the end, YOU did it. Be. A. Man.

Response by CPT Aaron Kletzing made Aug 24 at 2015 9:21 AM

CPT Aaron Kletzing — Mon, 24 Aug 2015 09:21:02 -0400

Take responsibility for your actions.

Response by SFC Jason Porter made Aug 24 at 2015 9:28 AM

SFC Jason Porter — Mon, 24 Aug 2015 09:28:24 -0400

You can claim any religion, but it does not mean you practice said religion.

Response by SSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 24 at 2015 9:43 AM

SSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 24 Aug 2015 09:43:18 -0400

Sadly, there are times that people want to blame their failing on something else. The double edged sword that I see from a lot of people that claim to be religious is that some try to lay responsibility for things at the feet of something spiritual. It is said that god gave us free will. Saying something went well because god willed it or failed because of failing of the flesh acting on its own is a cop out. He was weak. Both as a person and in his faith.he just refused to admit it.

Response by PO2 Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 24 at 2015 10:15 AM

PO2 Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 24 Aug 2015 10:15:55 -0400

Forgiveness, on some accounts, should be given simply because holding on to a grudge hurts yourself more than it does the other person. On other accounts, such as this, it should be begged for. If I was him (No, never would I be caught dead on such a site, but metaphorically speaking), I'd be praying day and night for forgiveness, and then doing everything I can in my power to keep my wife happy especially if she decided to stay. Would I expect forgiveness? Absolutely not. Would I try to blame someone or something else for MY ACTIONS? Absolutely not. This is another poor example of a Christian, and I suspect since he will not take account for his actions, he'll not be the happiest soul when his day of judgment comes. We have so few believers anymore, and even fewer "good" ones. Lord knows it makes it difficult to be a Christian.

Response by LCDR Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 24 at 2015 11:03 AM

LCDR Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 24 Aug 2015 11:03:58 -0400

As a Christian, I wanted to take a moment to address this. First of all, common sense dictates that this guy's actions are indicative of prior character...not a moment of mere misjudgement. While we may share different points of view of "faith", you hit the nail on the head by stating this individual should understand the "rules" of his own beliefs enough to see the potential for hypocrisy when not taking full responsibility for his actions. RP isn't the place for extensive discussions on theology, but the "Cliff Notes" version of scriptural guidance is this; believers are still humans...humans are imperfect...Christ's sacrifice provided the means for divine forgiveness...attaining true faith is comprised of first admitting to sin and praying for that forgiveness, then living in a renewed state of mind. All too often, Christians "assume" that their "moment" during a highly-charged, emotionally driven acceptance of the faith equates to "scrubbing" of their propensity to sin. In reality, temptation never ceases as long as you live, and LIVING in the faith is as much about self-denial and discipline as it is about belief. Now, does that mean a devout Christian won't cheat on their spouse? No. Does that mean that if a Christian does, and repents, that he or she cannot continue to grow in the faith? No. What it does mean is that a Christian should always consider that what they do in "private" is never hidden from God, and live in such a manner that we are as ashamed of failing Him as others. Online activity presents new challenges because one, it is too convenient and two, the ramifications can catch up with someone YEARS after they may have overcome that influence in their life. When I married, my wife and I had long discussions about our past...present and intended future. I had things in my past I had abandoned prior to our relationship, but it was important to admit that these acts may have far reaching consequences. Furthermore, it's important for couples to understand that just like an alcoholic is always subject to falling back into old habits, online sexual activity is as near as the closest wi-fi.

Response by MSG Floyd Williams made Aug 24 at 2015 11:08 AM

MSG Floyd Williams — Mon, 24 Aug 2015 11:08:38 -0400

The guy is just fooling himself, if a person let lust overpower him/her this is the end results sin is sin a choice.

Response by SGT Ben Keen made Aug 24 at 2015 11:23 AM

SGT Ben Keen — Mon, 24 Aug 2015 11:23:52 -0400

While I maintain my personal thoughts on faith to myself, I think this guy is just trying to save face. I think of it like this, say instead of signing up for the website, he decided that robbing a bank was a good idea. He gets caught and tells the police that he didn't do it, but rather his body did it without his knowledge. That wouldn't pass so why should this?

I think it would be better for him to just have come out and took accountability for what he did. After all, because of his faith he must realize that he will have to account for his actions again in front of St Peter. What will he say then?

Response by MSG Brad Sand made Aug 24 at 2015 12:00 PM

MSG Brad Sand — Mon, 24 Aug 2015 12:00:09 -0400

It is his fault, and while we are all sinners in God's eyes, he knew it was sinful to do this to his wife and it is good if he has repented, it is also sinful if he denies it is his fault.
I hope he is able to make it right with his wife.

Response by LCpl Mark Lefler made Aug 24 at 2015 12:02 PM

LCpl Mark Lefler — Mon, 24 Aug 2015 12:02:29 -0400

no, its his fault, no one made him do it.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 24 at 2015 12:13 PM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 24 Aug 2015 12:13:58 -0400

Personally I don’t have any issues/opinion with this person. This is between him, his wife and God. Jew or Gentile it shouldn’t matter. Who am I to judge?

In the Army I do have and opinion and it’s a bit harsher than what the UCMJ states.

Response by LCDR Rabbah Rona Matlow made Aug 24 at 2015 12:40 PM

LCDR Rabbah Rona Matlow — Mon, 24 Aug 2015 12:40:48 -0400

In Judaism, and I've quoted this before, the Talmud asks "Who is the mighty one? The one who conquers his (evil) inclination." As with many things, this Talmudic quote is universal...

Response by Capt Jeff S. made Aug 25 at 2015 7:21 AM

Capt Jeff S. — Tue, 25 Aug 2015 07:21:35 -0400

What happened to personal accountability? Christians, like everyone else, are subject to temptation and just like everyone else, they fall victim to their own desires. If you can't own up to your mistake, how can you repent and turn away from it? Him blaming sin for what he did is like a fat person blaming spoons for making them fat.

Response by CPT Pedro Meza made Aug 25 at 2015 10:31 AM

CPT Pedro Meza — Tue, 25 Aug 2015 10:31:52 -0400

I will be honest, this is more an issue of our time, there are too many claiming a religion only to hide behind their claimed religion and judge others, but never judge themselves and when exposed they once again claim their religion.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 26 at 2015 11:00 PM

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 26 Aug 2015 23:00:27 -0400

If you do something wrong, and the next day your still a person who would do that wrong thing... forgiveness by God or man is meaningless.

Response by CW3 Kevin Storm made Sep 9 at 2015 3:42 PM

CW3 Kevin Storm — Wed, 09 Sep 2015 15:42:51 -0400

I think it gets down between him and his wife. But nobody else typed his name and contact info in the block did they?

Response by CPT Michael Cullars made Mar 9 at 2022 7:11 PM

CPT Michael Cullars — Wed, 09 Mar 2022 19:11:52 -0500

Temptations can lead us to the wrong path. Because of our imperfect nature as humans, we should do our best to exercise restraint in making choices that could negatively impact ourselves and the lives of others.