What advice would you give others who are transitioning back to civilian life?

2016-09-14T11:44:29-04:00

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Response by ENS Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 14 at 2016 11:45 AM

2016-09-14T11:45:44-04:00

Remember where you came from and the professionalism you've learned. Stay humble and positive. Like anything, take it one step at a time. You will have so many opportunities awaiting you. Take what you've learned in the military and run with it!

Response by PO2 Kristy Williams made Sep 14 at 2016 11:54 AM

2016-09-14T11:54:10-04:00

Choose carefully what to use your MGI Bill or post 911 on. And use it fully.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 14 at 2016 11:56 AM

2016-09-14T11:56:13-04:00

Civilians don't understand us. It's not a bad thing. They just don't. They don't understand our work ethics. They don't understand our dedication. They don't understand things we do. They don't understand how we speak. It just is what it is.

Don't compare pay. In the military our pay is no secret. Anyone can figure out what we make.

Response by COL David Turk made Sep 14 at 2016 12:04 PM

2016-09-14T12:04:20-04:00

When making the transition, most of us are (were) finding our way into a new culture. The ability to "flex" is a necessity. Therefore, I would preclude any long term commitments until you are settled into the civilian side. For example, rent versus own a home. Don't buy/lease an expensive car/truck on a long term contract. Don't go on a spending spree for furniture, clothing. You don't have to stop cold, just keep it light in case the dream position/location pops up six or seven months after your exit from the military.
You'll know when you feel comfortable in your civilian life to turn on the long term spending.

Response by CPT Joseph K Murdock made Sep 14 at 2016 12:06 PM

2016-09-14T12:06:29-04:00

I went from being somebody to being a nobody.

Response by SrA Chris "Shadow" McGee made Sep 14 at 2016 12:49 PM

2016-09-14T12:49:54-04:00

DON'T DO IT!!!! Unless, it is retirement time of course lol I was medically discharged and still have problems with having not done my full 20 yrs.

Response by SGT Stanley Bass made Sep 14 at 2016 2:27 PM

2016-09-14T14:27:12-04:00

The separation folks will lie to you. go through your separation part, just dont believe what they say, listen to it but don't think it will all be true. I went through my separation and out processing and they were going to tell us what we were worth on the outside, and how much we will make, it ended up being after 7 days, you are worth as much as you can possibly get, what a crock. The transition itself, will be difficult, no matter what anybody tells you. You will either miss the comradely or the discipline or both. Find something relatively close to your last job in the military after you get out. When I started using my MGI I chose a major that was very related to my last job in the military to help with the transition. Not sure if it still applies, but I used all of my MGI and then used my post 9-11 and got another 12 months of education out of it. But don't let that GI bil go to waist, use it. NO matter what the military tells you, file a VA claim get everything rated 0 for no problems if that is the case, but get everything rated. That way down the road if you have any kind of trouble at all it could fall back on being service connected. Go to your local Veterans hall and talk to the Vietnam Veterans or American Legion. For me it was the Vietnam Veterans that offered the most support. Go to your local Va clinic, talk to people, they were all in the military, they can help with the transition they have all been through it. You will miss the job stability, unless you already have a job lined up outside.

Response by CPO Bill Penrod made Sep 14 at 2016 3:35 PM

2016-09-14T15:35:50-04:00

I told my kids when I retired that's it mom and I will always be in the same so you will always have a home to come home to. It worked for us.

Response by CPT Pedro Meza made Sep 14 at 2016 3:59 PM

2016-09-14T15:59:49-04:00

Use your GI Bill go to school, because now days with online courses there is no excuse; school will give you time to orient your self as your soul heals.

Response by SPC Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 14 at 2016 5:00 PM

2016-09-14T17:00:27-04:00

I would have been better off spending all of my military pay and moonlighting instead of saving for college. At least that way I could have started my transition knowing what a job application looks like.

Response by 1SG Al Brown made Sep 14 at 2016 5:03 PM

2016-09-14T17:03:45-04:00

Your ETS or retirement physical is the most important action that must be completed before the transition. All wounds, scars and current issues, physical or mental have to be annotated and you need a complete copy of all your med records (especially while deployed). The moment you transition, you are no longer in the service. Make sure it's done right, because the folks completing these actions know that you are not coming back to complain.

Response by SSG Keith Cashion made Sep 14 at 2016 6:07 PM

2016-09-14T18:07:15-04:00

Two conversations to have. If there is a significant other, that is conversation one. Remember this person has been at your side for however long, and knows the type of Military person you are. Let them tell you their fears of you getting out of the Military, and their hopes. We all know that some bring the Military in the home, and unless that significant other is able to stand up to you and say "Leave it at the door," there could be some issues. Remember, they have been in the Military as long as you have been together, they have adjusting to do as well. Have had several friends that had great relationships while in the Military, but once they got out and didn't transition well, ended up divorced.

Second conversation, your kids (if you have some). Kids like the significant other have been there for you, through deployments, field duty, injuries, recovery, etc. So whether you know it or not, your kids know a lot of what you go through, whether you tell them or not...they have friends, and friends that have parents who have transitioned and they see how it goes.

This is the time, that you, are now on the other side of that table, and when someone in the family needs help with something, or has to be there or needs a coach, mentor, friend, or just a SILENT non-judgmental ear to listen, you are it. Remember, they don't always want you to try to fix it, they just want you to LISTEN.

Just as in the Military, your dependents have always been part of your planning process, whether silently or verbally, so you can't forget that now, as everything you do from this point on affects them even more, the Military safety net is not there or is not the same as it was. Your are now Mr. or Mrs. Joe/Josephine Smith. Rank means nothing.

I know some will tell me that I am way off in my thinking, because jobs, school and other stuff are more important, and they are, but your family is still your priority one.

Response by PO2 Sam Corean made Sep 14 at 2016 6:14 PM

2016-09-14T18:14:19-04:00

Use a placement company (aka Headhunter). I used Bradley Morris when I got out as a junior nuke MM and it was an incredibly positive experience. So much so that I used them a few more times over the years as I was making those next steps in my career. BMI asked me to join the team about 6 months ago and I jumped at the chance. Now that I've been on both sides of the table, candidate and recruiter as well as candidate and interviewer, I can tell you that a Candidate Rep is absolutely invaluable in opening doors. I know there's some bad eggs out there but all I can tell you is that a headhunter was absolutely pivotal in my life and I'm honored and striving to be that same positive influence for my fellow vets.

Response by LTC Bink Romanick made Sep 14 at 2016 6:44 PM

2016-09-14T18:44:32-04:00

Lauren Marsh Learn how to match your socks!

Response by SSG Steven Mangus made Sep 14 at 2016 7:06 PM

2016-09-14T19:06:59-04:00

Prepare..try to have a job lined up upon leaving the service. Others have said, and I agree, civilians don't understand us. Don't get discouraged by what your going to see, do the best you can and you will be fine.

Response by SGT Linda Burgess made Sep 15 at 2016 1:10 PM

2016-09-15T13:10:14-04:00

Be open to self employment. See what USDA is offering.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 15 at 2016 5:21 PM

2016-09-15T17:21:57-04:00

Remember where you came from and remember who you are.

To often Service Members lose parts of themselves that are replaced by the rank they wear on their chest.

We were all civilians before we served, however even after service I won't think of myself as a civilian or transitioning to "civilian life".

In my eyes its more of a "Veteran Life". Our experience and poise define who we are and we can help civilians understand our thought process and way of life.

Response by SSG Stephan Pendarvis made Sep 15 at 2016 8:39 PM

2016-09-15T20:39:39-04:00

Transitioning services is always good....and mandatory. The resume writing class is the best block of instruction I ever received.

Response by SSgt Paul Esquibel made Sep 16 at 2016 7:14 PM

2016-09-16T19:14:39-04:00

There many, but primarily I would say be prepared for a lifestyle change involving monetary issues. That being said if your financially sound this still applies. You will have to budget in rent, utilities, food, entertainment etc. Most of the time we have never had to worry about rent etc with BAH/BAS but without that additional income you cannot maintain the lifestyle you used to have. You really do have to budget down and get serious with it or you risk serious debt that many Veterans experience.

Response by MAJ Raúl Rovira made Sep 17 at 2016 12:26 AM

2016-09-17T00:26:29-04:00

Use your leave wisely as it is paid time off that can be used for networking, finishing college, seminars and a fun with the family. Its the end of the road so live it up.

Response by PO3 Derek "Doc Potter" Wilson made Oct 3 at 2016 5:57 PM

2016-10-03T17:57:57-04:00

1. Save your money as far ahead as you can, and as much as you can.

2. Have a job lined up prior to separation. Most rentals require you to at least have a proof of income before they will even consider renting to you. We ran into this one. We had plenty of money saved to where we could sustain ourselves for 6 months, but no proof of income and likewise no rental.

3. Have a place to live in mind, even if it is temporary.

4. USE YOUR GI BILL!

5. Don't expect the world to stand in awe of you. You might have done several tours and seen a lot of combat, but in the civilian world it is a "thank you for your service" and "get back to work".

6. If you are claiming VA benefits, do it at least 6 months before separation, and don't rely on the VA to take good care of you afterward, injured or not. Get a civilian medical provider as soon as you can. It is possible to get medications for free through the VA if the civilian provider is prescribing them for something service connected. The office must fax the Rx to your primary VA provider along with all relevant notes.

7. Get copies of everything, including your medical and dental record.

8. Mybenefits website is a great resource. Use it.

9. See if your skills translate into useful certifications on the outside. Skills don't mean anything on the civilian side without a piece of paper.

10. You'll keep the lingo and the mindset for a while. Drop the cursing asap. The mindset will level out over time. I'm still working on this one.

Response by GySgt Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 25 at 2016 12:03 PM

2016-10-25T12:03:04-04:00

I will retire in a couple of months. I feel lost.

Response by Sgt Wayne Wood made Oct 25 at 2016 12:53 PM

2016-10-25T12:53:40-04:00

Either get used to being alone or form a affiliation with an organization, church, club, etc. family is fine but you'll find a need to belong.

Response by PO1 James Campbell made Oct 30 at 2016 5:14 PM

2016-10-30T17:14:36-04:00

Make sure your medical record is complete and everything documented before and during your separation physical. That is the most crucial thing you can do before you get out and have a hard copy. File your claim with the VA as soon as possible, time is everything. Have a plan in case your plans fall through. A great plan is to go to college. The GI Bill is just over $1800.00 a month right now going full time. Have as few bills as possible and as much saved as possible. Having a job lined up is great, some are not so lucky. Going to school is the best thing if all else fails. There are all kinds of ways to get help if you're going to school also Vocational Rehab if you are a DV. Which brings me back to getting your claim in ASAP to get your disability rating. Never give up and stay tough, you made it through the military, you can make it on the outside. Hell, I did.
If you can stay in and retire that's the best thing.

Response by SFC William Stephens A. Jr., 3 MSM, JSCM made Nov 7 at 2017 8:42 AM

2017-11-07T08:42:26-05:00

It don't happen over night, give it time and get upset with yourself. Network, make a plan and have goal.

Response by SGT Stanley Bass made Nov 7 at 2017 1:17 PM

2017-11-07T13:17:17-05:00

as stated below.
1. make sure everything is documented from head to toe. When we get to the VA system outside, if anything ever happens. and you had it documented before you got out. You can be rated for it. Even if the Va Rates you 0. You can be rated higher later if you have problems.
2. also as stated below. surround yourself with other Veterans. Go to VFW VVA or other Veteran meetings. They all had to transition also. They can help.
3. Use your GI bill. Personally I was struggling, and you will also, everybody does. Because you will miss the comradery. Try to find something that relates to something you did at a previous duty assignment. That helped me tons. When you go to School. Also use the Veterans resource center, if they have one at the school. There will be other Veterans there to talk to.
4. the financial side of it is an eye opening. I will not duplicate what was said below. But it is an eye opening experience.

Response by MSG Brad Sand made Nov 7 at 2017 1:42 PM

2017-11-07T13:42:31-05:00

Start looking for your civilian career now. The more you do now, the easier it will be down the road.

Response by Georgeann Carter made May 29 at 2018 7:08 AM

2018-05-29T07:08:50-04:00

There are sites and companies out there that offer a skills translation service.... check out this link. https://jobs.comcast.com/military

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