What could civilians take away from working with veterans?

SPC Lucas Predmore — Wed, 27 Jul 2016 18:28:41 -0400

What are some things civilians should know about working with Veterans? Anything from understanding why we are so direct in our discussions to what to do if one of us has a PTSD episode. For instance, I keep being told that I am mean mugging people and they think I'm pissed at them. But most of the time, I'm just looking around.

Response by SFC Joe S. Davis Jr., MSM, DSL made Jul 27 at 2016 6:32 PM

SFC Joe S. Davis Jr., MSM, DSL — Wed, 27 Jul 2016 18:32:51 -0400

SPC Lucas Predmore thanks for the read and share: simply DUTY HONOR COUNTRY!

Response by SSG Stephan Pendarvis made Jul 27 at 2016 6:50 PM

SSG Stephan Pendarvis — Wed, 27 Jul 2016 18:50:08 -0400

lol....learning how not to complain.

Response by SSG Roger Ayscue made Jul 27 at 2016 8:41 PM

SSG Roger Ayscue — Wed, 27 Jul 2016 20:41:21 -0400

We have a totally different perspective on life. Civilians look at a lost sale or a missed phone call as a disaster ... To Combat Vets, if no one got DEAD or Wounded...it is NOT a disaster and NOT worth raising your blood pressure

Response by SGT David T. made Jul 28 at 2016 7:50 AM

SGT David T. — Thu, 28 Jul 2016 07:50:01 -0400

In many cases, how not to act. Too many of us are arrogant with a sense of entitlement which is projected into everyday dealings. On a positive note, they can learn how not to stress about things that do not matter.

Response by PO3 Sandra Gomke made Jul 28 at 2016 10:17 AM

PO3 Sandra Gomke — Thu, 28 Jul 2016 10:17:12 -0400

Civilians need to understand that combat vets are very aware of their surroundings at all times. That the work ethic of a vet trumps the "I'm entitled" ethic of the average civilian worker. That vets will follow orders. Vets will get the job done. Period.

Response by SSG Keith Cashion made Jul 28 at 2016 11:34 AM

SSG Keith Cashion — Thu, 28 Jul 2016 11:34:23 -0400

SPC Lucas Predmore I get told I am mean all of the time, and asked why I am so pissed off as well. Like others have said, it's the difference of the discipline that we have been taught or ingrained into our heads about the mission gets accomplished, or the I know I need to get this done, but it can wait instead of knocking it out now. The difference between I am supposed to be at my desk working at 0700 or showing up at 0710 and thinking it's ok when I get here, the customers can wait for me. It's the difference between finishing those last couple of steps of a project or literally running out the door at 1559 everyday.

I have a tendency to speak what is on my mind, and some do not like it, or the fact that they cannot handle the fact that they are adults and I expect them act like adults and get the job done. But then again, people will complain that I am mean mugging them as well. I think that some people live for the office drama, either to create it or to add fuel to the flame. I have no time for that.

Response by Sgt Chris Lima made Jul 28 at 2016 2:14 PM

Sgt Chris Lima — Thu, 28 Jul 2016 14:14:13 -0400

Funny you mention that, as a teacher people always asked me "are you ok?" I guess I just look mad all the time... I learned to make a joke out of it. I'd just smile really big and say "Nope! That's just how my face looks!"

I really think that as veterans, we have more of a responsibility to adapt our ways and especially our responses (maybe just me) to a new environment. It's not fair to ask the world to adapt to us.

Response by LTC Stephen C. made Jul 28 at 2016 4:37 PM

LTC Stephen C. — Thu, 28 Jul 2016 16:37:29 -0400

SPC Lucas Predmore, I think it's worth looking at this from a different perspective. Although statistics may vary, a study I read recently indicated that .4% of the American population are active military personnel. Further, a mere 7.3% of the entire American population has served in the military at some point in time in their lives. All that to say, former military personnel entering the civilian workforce are by far in the minority.
Those in the civilian workforce aren't thinking about the military, who served, and what issues they may or may not have. People are not trying to be insensitive to a veteran's personal issues in the least, it's just not in the civilian mindset to consider such things. Everyone is simply doing their job, and that is what they expect from those who served as well. In my workplace there are a few others who served. We talk among ourselves on occasion, but otherwise no one would ever know we had been in the service. Also, our private conversations never center on "us versus the civilians", or the "civilians just don't understand". To me, it would serve no purpose and could represent a possible failure to integrate into the civilian workplace.
Ultimately, it's up to us to fit ourselves into the civilian workplace. After all, we're what's known as the "One Percent". COL Mikel J. Burroughs

Response by SPC Lucas Predmore made Jul 28 at 2016 6:39 PM

SPC Lucas Predmore — Thu, 28 Jul 2016 18:39:08 -0400

I couldn't agree with you all more about civilians not having to adapt to us. It is our responsibility to adapt to civilian life. But there are things that can help ease the transition. And like Sgt David Thomas pointed out. Sometimes it's what not to do. Like even trying to calm someone down who gets agitated from a loud noise or something. They are trying to be helpful but getting close and trying to talk to you will make it worse when all you need is a couple minutes to breathe and calm down. It's like throwing water on a grease fire, they are trying to help but only make it worse. I know most veterans don't want any accommodations, but there are things that we will always do. We often had meetings at my last job and I always sat back outside the group a few feet because I still get agitated when people are constantly getting up and down right next to me and walking behind me. They kept telling me to come sit down in the group and I just couldn't. And I didn't want to tell them why right off the bat because I didn't want them to define me as PTSD Guy. I eventually told them. They are fine with it now. This is not a question about what should civilians do for us. It's a question of what can they understand about us. Most people want to understand but don't know what to ask. And if they do ask, they say "what do you need?" or "is there anything you need?" And most veterans will not admit that they need anything. Because they do not want accommodations. And "needing" something often makes veterans/civilians/everybody feel weak.

Response by CWO2 James Mathews made Jun 28 at 2018 11:09 AM

CWO2 James Mathews — Thu, 28 Jun 2018 11:09:26 -0400

My idea about what the civilians around me could learn from veterans is wrapped up in one word, "Dependablity." Most people, it would seem, do not take their work, word, or promises seriously! Of course, there are some exceptions, but things like promises, statements, scedules get interruped or totally oblierated for the flimsiist of reasons, and it usually appears that no effort was expended to avoid the disruption. I am absolutelutely sure, for instance, that a good portion of our national politicians do not hue to the lines of their Oaths of Office for services to their constituents, as a veteran hues to his or her Oath of Service. That by what they say and do publicly! Now I do not make a big thing of my service any more than any civilian makes a thing about their achievements, but I do honor the Navy with a special jacket with a my ships on which I served recorded by sewing the ships patches on the jacket which I wear on Flag Day. Outside of that, a small pin on my lapel will suffice. I am proud of my service, but I recognize a civlian's pride in their service and achiements as well.