What is everyone's opinion on NCOs dating junior enlisted soldiers?

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 20 Jun 2014 10:32:51 -0400

Hello Leaders,
What is everyone's opinion on NCOs dating lower enlisted soldiers? Example: a SGT and a SPC different brigades but work in the same building?

Response by 1SG Private RallyPoint Member made Jun 20 at 2014 10:38 AM

1SG Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 20 Jun 2014 10:38:49 -0400

My opinion?!

NO-GO

Response by CW2 Private RallyPoint Member made Jun 20 at 2014 12:15 PM

CW2 Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 20 Jun 2014 12:15:55 -0400

Nothing says that they can't unless you want to use the gray areas of the regulation or you aren't giving us the full story:

b.
Relationships between Soldiers of different rank are prohibited if they—
(1) Compromise, or appear to compromise, the integrity of supervisory authority or the chain of command.
(2) Cause actual or perceived partiality or unfairness.
(3) Involve, or appear to involve, the improper use of rank or position for personal gain.
(4) Are, or are perceived to be, exploitative or coercive in nature.
(5) Create an actual or clearly predictable adverse impact on discipline, authority, morale, or the ability of the
command to accomplish its mission

1. I don't see how that could really be, they aren't going to be influencing within the chain of command nor are they in the same chain of command unless you start getting to the flag officer level.

2. If they work together but are in different brigades, this could come up, but you just talk about working in the same building. So that wouldn't apply unless again you are not saying something.

3. Nope

4. Nope

5. Ahhh, the catch all. What you need to ask is realistically does it REALLY compromise any of that? Or are you just upset because you know it exists? How, specifically, is it affecting morale? I can't possibly imagine it affecting morale and discipline from one BDE to another. Within a platoon, maybe. A company, yeah I guess that could happen. Within a BN, somewhat doubtful. Within a BDE of thousands of people, highly unlikely. Between different brigades or duty stations? Give me a break.

Response by COL Jason Smallfield, PMP, CFM, CM made Jun 20 at 2014 12:27 PM

COL Jason Smallfield, PMP, CFM, CM — Fri, 20 Jun 2014 12:27:17 -0400

A few points regarding NCOs dating lower enlisted Soldiers:
- As far as I am tracking, officers and enlisted can not date (called fraternization) but NCOs dating junior enlisted is not specifically unauthorized per Army Regulation.
- METT-TC. Short way of saying the answer depends a lot upon the specific circumstances of the situation. Some of the variables can include:
- Rank discrepancy. Just as I would not have a problem with a high school freshman dating an 8th grader but I would have a problem with a high school senior dating a 7th grader; I would generally not have a problem with a SGT dating a SPC but I would have a problem with a SGM/1SG/SFC dating a PFC.
- Age discrepancy. The average SPC is probably about 22 years old but a SPC could be 38 years old. The average SFC is proabably about 38 years old. If the two Soldiers are relatively close in age then this could mitigate a rank discrepancy. Goes to life experience and maturity.
- Chain of command. Dating within the same chain of command is definitely a red flag issue as this is generally detrimental to good order and discipline.
- Appearances and perceptions. Even if not within the same chain of command. Does the dating create the appearance or perception of favoritism or other issues detrimental to the good order and discipline within either command? If so then the dating should not occur.

Response by 1SG Mike Case made Jun 20 at 2014 12:29 PM

1SG Mike Case — Fri, 20 Jun 2014 12:29:00 -0400

There is nothing stopping a SGT from dating a SPC, as long as the SGT isn't in charge of the SPC. As for working in the same building, as long as they can remain professional, why not.

*EDIT* This answer was prior to the regulation change that precludes Enlisted and NCOs from dating.

Response by CMSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Jun 20 at 2014 3:23 PM

CMSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Fri, 20 Jun 2014 15:23:38 -0400

It comes down to whether or not there is a perception of favoritism or of an unprofessional relationship. If they are not in each other's chain and can remain professional throughout the day, I see no issues.

Response by MSG Martin C. made Jun 20 at 2014 3:35 PM

MSG Martin C. — Fri, 20 Jun 2014 15:35:16 -0400

The short answer is they are allowed as long as the NCO it's not in the chain of the Soldier, the problem here I guess is the perception of the people in the unit. We cannot assume all PVTs are in the early 20s just like we cannot assume all Senior enlisted are old and in their 40s so there is many tangibles in a situation as such. All situations will be different and as long as there is no violations to the good order and discipline of the unit and both parties are consenting and single this will continue to happen because it's not illegal there in no crime on the eyes of the Army however that perception that such situation may bring it's something else. I personally knew a female CPT that resigned her commission to marry a SSG, what a case like these tells me it's that in matters of the heart no regulation is sufficient because obviously she knew their relationship was unauthorized and she willingly chose to date the SSG.

Response by SSG Mike Angelo made Jun 21 at 2014 5:45 PM

SSG Mike Angelo — Sat, 21 Jun 2014 17:45:27 -0400

I would observe the chemistry. Sometimes humanity over policy can be a career changer especially in the active duty component. As for the Guards and Reserves, I would look at how these relationships affect the unit or local State militia program.

The Active Duty component does have a restriction toward these relationships, yet the Guards and Reserves build on them because they are State governed.

If and when the Active Duty component would continue to draw down, States are opening Civilian slots within the Guards and Reserves organizational design and restructure.

Working with MilPers and Active Duty leaders can better facilitate better outcomes for a win win, providing career shifts and options, addressed above for their personnel become available.

Look at USAJOBS online and one can observe Civilian/Guard/Reserve career options for folks who are in the game/dating changer target in their chain.

Response by 1SG Robert Branch made Jun 21 at 2014 9:32 PM

1SG Robert Branch — Sat, 21 Jun 2014 21:32:34 -0400

Why in the world would NCOS be discussing junk like this, I would ask one question, are you ready for WAR?? If not you should get ready because one is on its way!!

Response by PO1 G. Leslie /Stiltner made Jun 24 at 2014 10:19 PM

PO1 G. Leslie /Stiltner — Tue, 24 Jun 2014 22:19:29 -0400

Well my family is a product of Fraternization!! I was an E-5 my Husband and E-6 When we started talking. We were both on recruiting Duty I was at one recruiting station he at another 60 plus miles away. We were in the same Zone (division so to speak). He made E-7 and I did not make E-6, however we still continued to date and the command knew about it. What came a year later was very unexpected, The shuffled borders and re aligned stations and he became my boss. We continued to date very discretely, which was not hard since it was not like we were on a ship or Naval Base we still were 60 plus miles apart. However there were still hardships as we had different recruiting stations and this made for some micro managing that worked for his guys in his station but for me in a satellite station it did not work the same. Luckily they realized their border realignment was a bad idea and they yet again in true Navy Fashion re aligned the borders again making my station a separate station. We eventually got married and that would be another story for the Destiny discussion! I feel that it can be done but it needs to be done discretely. Keeping work and Family separate is hard but can be done. What do you tell to PFC's in the same category that fall in love and one gets promoted and the other does not, happens all the time in the Navy because of rates that are closed or do not advance as quickly as others. Do you tell them they are no longer in love? I think not because if they are in truly in love this is not something that can be turned on and off like a light switch.

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Jun 24 at 2014 10:43 PM

SGT Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 24 Jun 2014 22:43:43 -0400

This is a common thing in the Reserves. We have had many married couples in our company. My wife is in the same unit as me and she is a SPC (we were married before I became a SGT, and together before she came to my unit) we are in different platoons and keep it professional at all times. I see no problem with this as long as you are not in each other's chain of command and keep it professional in the workplace.

Response by LCDR Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 30 at 2014 12:12 PM

LCDR Private RallyPoint Member — Thu, 30 Oct 2014 12:12:53 -0400

It's a violation of the DOD fraternization policy. Plain and simple.

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Nov 3 at 2014 6:40 PM

SGT Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 03 Nov 2014 18:40:08 -0500

New changes to AR 600-20, dated 22 October 2014
read para 4-14

"(2) Dating, shared living accommodations other than those directed by operational requirements, and intimate or sexual relationships between officers and enlisted personnel, or NCOs and junior enlisted Soldiers. This prohibition
does not apply to the following"

This says NCO's and junior enlisted cannot date. If the status changes while they are in a relationship they have to break it off or marry within one year.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Feb 3 at 2015 2:20 AM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 02:20:00 -0500

As long as they don't have the same Chain of Command or NCO support Channel I don't see anything wrong with it as long as it stays professional and we keep the Creed of the Non-Commisioned Officer well versed in our minds. If there is a large rank gap / and age gap then you have to wonder what is really going on though because those are different mind sets of being a CSM of a Bn and trying to sham out of detail as a SPC or PFC.

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Feb 3 at 2015 3:17 AM

SGT Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 03 Feb 2015 03:17:58 -0500

Check out the new rules for Fraternization.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 5 at 2015 11:08 PM

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 05 Aug 2015 23:08:16 -0400

AR 600-20 para 4-14 now prohibits this.

Response by SSgt Alex Robinson made Aug 5 at 2015 11:40 PM

SSgt Alex Robinson — Wed, 05 Aug 2015 23:40:54 -0400

Outside the chain of command is fine.

Response by SGT Scott Bell made Sep 4 at 2015 6:48 AM

SGT Scott Bell — Fri, 04 Sep 2015 06:48:59 -0400

no way

Response by PO1 Jack Howell made Jul 1 at 2016 1:09 PM

PO1 Jack Howell — Fri, 01 Jul 2016 13:09:45 -0400

It's fraternization and is punishable under the UCMJ (Article 92 Failure to obey an order or regulation) and Article 134 (General article)). There's no gray area.

Response by TSgt J.L. Brown Jr made Jul 5 at 2016 11:35 AM

TSgt J.L. Brown Jr — Tue, 05 Jul 2016 11:35:45 -0400

I understand how things get started, if in a different command nothing wrong, but same unit, same building they really should avoid it

Response by SGT Randel Pruett made Jul 6 at 2016 4:23 PM

SGT Randel Pruett — Wed, 06 Jul 2016 16:23:16 -0400

As long as they aren't in the same chain of command who cares what they do in their off time?

Response by SPC Roger Giffen made Jul 6 at 2016 4:43 PM

SPC Roger Giffen — Wed, 06 Jul 2016 16:43:33 -0400

We were told as long as the officer wasn't in our chain of command or if she wasn't in the position to further our career, we could date just about anyone we wanted. This was in 1974-80

Response by Cpl Christopher Bishop made Jul 7 at 2016 3:41 AM

Cpl Christopher Bishop — Thu, 07 Jul 2016 03:41:13 -0400

I figured the whole point was to avoid "fraternization" which is generally only relevant when dating your own chain of command, downward. I suppose that could be extended to "not in the same unit".

Observation: It seems many of you Army folks are often quick to jump to quoting the AR(s). Im not saying the AR(s) are totally irrelevant....but the original question asked you for YOUR OPINION, and Im sure if that individual wanted the mindless response of "The AR States: Blibbity-Blah" they likely could have looked that up themselves.

So while its not really my intention to sidetrack the topic, or to bother with Branch smack-talking...I gotta ask...Is it REALLY Army training that teaches you that you have no opinion other than what the AR states? I'm guessing the original post was asking your opinion/interpretation of the AR, not merely the AR itself.

Surely most would find it rather retarded that a SGT who dates a SGT for a time, perhaps even marries, then one of them later transitions to an Officer program or into a Warrant Officer bit...should have to suddenly cease their relationship because one now has to salute the other in public...especially if during their working day they are in completely different units and not in the same chain of command. Yet some of you are saying "An officer can't date an enlisted" as if its an absolute thing. I'm sure there must be some clause where it mentions "with unit commander's consent" or something similar. If every AR was treated that with such rigidity, Id guess both would go AWOL to be together anyway---and that doesn't really best serve the Army, now does it?

Response by LTC Eric Coger made Aug 9 at 2016 5:49 AM

LTC Eric Coger — Tue, 09 Aug 2016 05:49:26 -0400

IMHO, I think that being in different units or outside the chain of concern/command is irrelevant. If an E-3 is dating an E-7, that E-3's perception of all E-7s (and below) is altered. And not for the better. When something is in the grey area, just avoid it; if they are your one and only as some have stated, then one of the service members should get out of the service.

Response by Sgt Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 9 at 2016 9:10 AM

Sgt Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 09 Aug 2016 09:10:57 -0400

No go there are rules for a reason members should follow them or get out

Response by 1SG Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 9 at 2016 9:44 AM

1SG Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 09 Aug 2016 09:44:54 -0400

Fraternization only comes into play if the SPC is in the SGT's rating and of course this is not the case! I don't see anything wrong with it! If it goes south, then the SGT may want to volunteer for Siberia!!! Ha! All the best to them! - Top

Response by LCpl Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 9 at 2016 12:30 PM

LCpl Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 09 Aug 2016 12:30:07 -0400

The one NCO that thinks of this . His or Her future is over .

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 9 at 2016 8:27 PM

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 09 Aug 2016 20:27:39 -0400

As long as they are not in the same CoC and it does not affect their work then there is really nothing anyone can do about it.

Response by A1C Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 9 at 2016 8:44 PM

A1C Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 09 Aug 2016 20:44:50 -0400

As long as they are not part of their chain of command, I don't see why it should be a problem

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 9 at 2016 10:08 PM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 09 Aug 2016 22:08:53 -0400

IAW with latest ARTICLES 600-20 chapter 4 it is not allowed

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 9 at 2016 11:55 PM

SGT Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 09 Aug 2016 23:55:56 -0400

It's surprising to see how many people don't seem to realize the regulation changed as well as how many seem to think it's okay regardless of the change. At the end of the day opinions don't outweigh rank or responsibilities. If you don't agree with the regulations enough to believe they don't have to be followed, it's probably time to call it quits.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 10 at 2016 9:01 AM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 10 Aug 2016 09:01:17 -0400

If this is a legitimate question then your are not an NCO period.

Response by SGT Keaven Brown made Aug 20 at 2016 1:14 AM

SGT Keaven Brown — Sat, 20 Aug 2016 01:14:34 -0400

Its not a good idea

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 30 at 2016 7:13 AM

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 30 Aug 2016 07:13:17 -0400

He can do it. Then once he receives his punishment under UCMJ for being in violation of AR 600-20, Chapter 4, they will be the same rank. Once they are both Specialist and assuming the Command didn't impose a no contact order, they will be free to date.

Response by SCPO Don Baker made Aug 30 at 2016 7:29 AM

SCPO Don Baker — Tue, 30 Aug 2016 07:29:25 -0400

I believe the main thing is that the couple is not in the same command.

Response by SFC Joseph Weber made Aug 30 at 2016 8:05 AM

SFC Joseph Weber — Tue, 30 Aug 2016 08:05:46 -0400

Don't do it. Wait till they get promoted or one of you ETS.

Response by CPO Zack Lindsey made Aug 30 at 2016 9:06 AM

CPO Zack Lindsey — Tue, 30 Aug 2016 09:06:25 -0400

It looks like it is well covered if the person is in your chain no no no also if that person is where is that person at in the chain at the very bottom again it could be a gray area like egg shells and well things is going to happen so you just have to be aware of the rules of your actions. And take what comes

Response by MSG Mitch Dowler made Aug 30 at 2016 9:21 AM

MSG Mitch Dowler — Tue, 30 Aug 2016 09:21:19 -0400

People within the same community and within close proximity with each other are going to have instances where some date and fall in love. When in Korea or other locations overseas the dating pool with the civilian community is limited and it is even more likely that military will date military. Women gravitate more toward older men than men do toward women. This increases the chances that one will be an NCO and once will be lower enlisted.

I don't see any issue with it unless the two are within the same NCO support channel. I don't mean to say that problems cannot happen because it does depend on the individuals maturity and outside perception.

Response by SSG Steve Finlan made Aug 30 at 2016 10:47 AM

SSG Steve Finlan — Tue, 30 Aug 2016 10:47:52 -0400

Conditional to a prior existing relationship (e.g. 2 E4s dating, one gets promoted to E5), I would say NCOs should exhibit the professionalism required of them and refrain from dating lower enlisted not simply to observe regulation, but because it is required for good order and discipline. NCOs need to be seen as Leaders of Soldiers at all times. Any relationship, no matter how innocent, may be seen by other lower enlisted troops as 'favoritism'. It simply is the nature of people, regardless of profession. I would caution NCOs to avoid dating lower enlisted at all, except in the case of a previously existing relationship.

Response by SFC J. Wheeler Hammontree made Aug 30 at 2016 10:58 AM

SFC J. Wheeler Hammontree — Tue, 30 Aug 2016 10:58:27 -0400

Our opinion doesn't matter. There's a regulation. Follow it.

Response by PO2 Steven Hardy made Aug 30 at 2016 11:04 AM

PO2 Steven Hardy — Tue, 30 Aug 2016 11:04:10 -0400

I don't know about the other branches, but when I was in the CG the policy was, to the best of my recolection, No officers with enlisted (unless married prior to commisioning), no E-7 or above with E-4 and below, no one in the same chain of command, and no one on sea units, or units below 80 people with people in the same unit.

Response by TSgt George Rodriguez made Aug 30 at 2016 11:10 AM

TSgt George Rodriguez — Tue, 30 Aug 2016 11:10:01 -0400

As a Staff Sgt in the Air Force in the medical career field I married a WAF E2 Airmen who was in Hq unit. I was 27and she was 22. She was my soul mate and after 43 years 4 children, 9 grandchildren, 4 great-grandchildren and #5 on the way. Why should the military govern who should marry or otherwise fraternize with. Only in the military does this make a difference.

Response by SSG Patrick Thomas made Aug 30 at 2016 11:25 AM

SSG Patrick Thomas — Tue, 30 Aug 2016 11:25:31 -0400

I have been against fraternization especially for inter-unit romances. They are a moral killer every time. Unfortunately in the National Guard you end up with Husbands and Wives sometimes assigned to the same units with no appreciable issue. I have also seen senior NCO's dating junior enlisted and the problems it has created. Moral tanked and not only did the senior staff look the other way, they gave both service members awards and promotions....

Response by SGT Frank Donk made Aug 30 at 2016 12:14 PM

SGT Frank Donk — Tue, 30 Aug 2016 12:14:05 -0400

Extremely slippery slope

Response by SFC Donald York made Aug 30 at 2016 12:38 PM

SFC Donald York — Tue, 30 Aug 2016 12:38:21 -0400

I would weigh the risks of dating an enlisted female soldier if you are at an E-5 grade. A lot of men have had their careers shattered if the female decides to call the escapades rape.

Response by 1SG Harold Piet made Aug 30 at 2016 1:25 PM

1SG Harold Piet — Tue, 30 Aug 2016 13:25:29 -0400

I know a LTC that is married to a SPC.(reserves) I see no problem as long as they are not in the same unit, where rank may influence behavior. If the regulations do not prevent it, neither do I. I do always demand that we maintain military bearing and our behaior on and off duty can and will effect carrears.

Response by SSG Brian MacBain made Aug 30 at 2016 4:13 PM

SSG Brian MacBain — Tue, 30 Aug 2016 16:13:27 -0400

Now I been retired for 10yrs so if the regulation has changed (most likely it has) keep that in mind. An NCO can date junior enlisted when neither of them are in the chain of command. A NCO in one unit can date a SPC/PFC in a totally different unit. I believe that goes with Officers dating enlisted as well. However, if they are in the same unit, then the answer would be no that can't.

Response by SSG Richard Stevens made Aug 30 at 2016 6:07 PM

SSG Richard Stevens — Tue, 30 Aug 2016 18:07:43 -0400

When I was in back in the 80s NCO's were not allowed to date lower enlistmented

Response by SSG Mark Franzen made Aug 30 at 2016 8:41 PM

SSG Mark Franzen — Tue, 30 Aug 2016 20:41:13 -0400

I totally didn't think that a good idea the reason is if they are in the same Building. Than if they got into Argument it's
Doesn't look good because of the rank Structure E5 @ E 4 then it should be not authorized From both Commands.
SSG Mark Franzen Veteran of US Army

Response by 1SG Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 31 at 2016 2:00 AM

1SG Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 31 Aug 2016 02:00:26 -0400

IT IS JUST MY OINION BUT WHO'S LISTENING, ANYWAY LOVE IS AN EMOTION THAT WE ALL WERE BORN WITH, AND WE CANNOT CONTROL OUR NATURAL EMOTIONS OF WHO WE FEEL DRAWN TO , A PERSONS RANK IS AN INNATE OBJECT WITOUT FEELINGS, A HUMAN BEING IS A SOUL WITH FEELINGS, THAT BEING SAID, LET WHAT IS NATURAL BE NATURAL, AND LET WHAT IS UNNATURAL BE UNNATURAL.RANK IS AN UNNAT OBJECT. PLACED ON THE CLOTHING OF A HUMAN BEING, IT CANNOT LOVE A HUMAN BEING, ONLY A HUMAN BEING CAN SHARE THE LOVE OF ANOTHER HUMAN BEING. THAT BEING SAID SOLDIERS SHOULD BE HELD ACCOUTABLE FOR THEIR ACTIONS EQUALLY UNDER THE LAW NO MATTER WHAT THEIR RANK IS YOU CANT MISTREAT A PERSON JUST BECAUSE YOU HOLD A HIGHER RANK, IF IT HAPPENS, YOU SHOULD BE HELD ACCOUTABLE AND THE LAW SHALL PREVAIL, YOU SHOULD NOT GIVE PREFERENTIAL TREATMENT, IF ONE DOES, THE LAW SHALL PREVAIL AGAINST THAT SUBJECT WHO IS MISUSING THEIR RANK. ABUSE IS ABUSE NO MATTER WHAT RANK A SOLDIER IS, HOLD THEM ACCOUNTABLE. AS A SOCIETY OPERATING AS HUMAN BEINGS WITHIN THE MILITARY WE SHOULD HAVE THE RIGHT TO DATE OTHER HUMAN BEINGS NO MATTER WHAT THEIR RANK IS. BUT THATS MY OPINION WHICH MEANS NOTHING AS LONG AS THE MILITARY REGULATION REMAIN AS IT IS.

Response by PO1 Robert Closson made Aug 31 at 2016 10:50 AM

PO1 Robert Closson — Wed, 31 Aug 2016 10:50:08 -0400

This is what a call a slippery slope once you give the green light for such a thing you set your work center, division, department and command for complaints of favoritism. NCO'S in all branches of the military hold a certain amount of power that can be easily abused. Then take into account when the relationship goes south the effects of this can be a major headache for the command and I have seen it first hand it is very ugly. In short don't shit where you eat.

Response by Sgt Nicole Beltran made Aug 31 at 2016 11:11 AM

Sgt Nicole Beltran — Wed, 31 Aug 2016 11:11:28 -0400

I think the only way that would be a problem if you were in the same chain ... only because if you have relationship issues it can effect your work environment :) otherwise who cares ... yes its against policy but we're all adults and you can't help who you fall for..so personally I don't think it should be a policy or an issue.

Response by PO1 Robert Johnson made Aug 31 at 2016 4:47 PM

PO1 Robert Johnson — Wed, 31 Aug 2016 16:47:17 -0400

I've been retired for over 25 years but when I was a hard charging E-3 at the ripe old age of 18 and had my sights set on dating a gorgeous E-6 and there seemed to be some return interest. I guess my interests were noticed by others and one day my LPO took me to the chow hall for a cup of coffee and strongly advised me in the ways of the Navy. He told me that it was okay for enlisted people to fraternize but that it was a really valuable practice to stay 1 up or 1 down in rate structure and never, ever with your superior. I took his advice to heart and never got in trouble in that respect.

Response by SSG Chad Simmons made Sep 1 at 2016 11:59 AM

SSG Chad Simmons — Thu, 01 Sep 2016 11:59:33 -0400

First check with your and your intended[s] chains of command, I would say it sounds ILL advised to date within the workplace setting, as if things go downhill this is bound to cause issues that could negatively affect yourself and the SM in question.

Response by SFC Charles Temm made Sep 2 at 2016 7:03 PM

SFC Charles Temm — Fri, 02 Sep 2016 19:03:33 -0400

different bdes in the same building? That seems a bit odd, a support unit I assume?

Since it's the same bldg but I have no idea how big (the Pentagon maybe?) it makes things a bit more sticky. Overall I'd say fine as long as they are in different units.

Response by SA Jim Arnold made Sep 9 at 2016 10:40 PM

SA Jim Arnold — Fri, 09 Sep 2016 22:40:38 -0400

I don't see a problem with it. You can't stop love, so let it be.

Response by SFC George Smith made Sep 10 at 2016 12:04 AM

SFC George Smith — Sat, 10 Sep 2016 00:04:44 -0400

Touchy subject... I got away with it because she was assigned to the Hospital (45th Field) and I was in a Line Unit (1/509th)... the First time and the Second time I was In SWTC (Special Forces Training Command) and she worked at Womack Army Hospital... the was no Conflict of Interest ...

Response by SGM Bill Frazer made Apr 25 at 2018 7:21 PM

SGM Bill Frazer — Wed, 25 Apr 2018 19:21:06 -0400

Oh God NO- Yes they are in different unit but still work in same area- way to dangerous.

Response by SFC J. Wheeler Hammontree made Mar 21 at 2019 11:56 AM

SFC J. Wheeler Hammontree — Thu, 21 Mar 2019 11:56:34 -0400

My opinion doesn't matter. AR 600-20 is clear on what is and is not permitted.

Response by 1SG John Highfill made Jul 23 at 2019 9:01 AM

1SG John Highfill — Tue, 23 Jul 2019 09:01:41 -0400

Be careful that in know way your position is in any way related to hers Fraternization is strictly forbidden

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 14 at 2019 5:18 PM

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 14 Aug 2019 17:18:18 -0400

So the answer to this question is? I read the reg and not understanding it clearly so if you have a NCO and SPC that are in total different units (and close in age) and don’t have anything to to do with each other’s chain of command are they allowed to date ?

Response by SMSgt Bob Wilson made Oct 26 at 2020 1:09 AM

SMSgt Bob Wilson — Mon, 26 Oct 2020 01:09:02 -0400

I've never seen a problem; however, they must be in different chains of command [ie, one can not supervise the other].

Response by PO3 Pamala McBrayer made Sep 17 at 2022 1:03 AM

PO3 Pamala McBrayer — Sat, 17 Sep 2022 01:03:47 -0400

Danger Will Robinson!
The senior has the most to lose.
I would make sure my chain KNEW about the relationship. As a rule, in civilian life, dating at work can be fatal to one’s job if it ends badly. I married my former supervisor from my job, but I had already resigned and leaving the company, before I let him know that I was interested in dating him, on my way out.
I don’t recommend it, normally, and I had learned the hard way once before . But, I have been with that former supervisor 13 years, and married for 10 now. Choose carefully or wait for a better season.