Posted on Oct 5, 2016
What is the best way to tell your unit that you in no way shape or form want an ETS award from them?
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First off, wow kinda surprised this generated any response at all. I was looking more for a "oh hey, just do this memorandum and it's all done." kind of a deal. Anyways as for context, awards here go through about 15 or more corrections for non-grammatical issues. The award hasn't been written yet and I would probably end up writing it anyways. I just don't want to waste anyone's time or my own for that matter with writing an award that a civilian company cares not a whit about that just going to get kicked back over and over and over. I know what I have done and I honestly don't care much for recognition. I'd rather see some of my Soldiers get credited as they go on to do bigger and better things. Do I also have other motivations for not wanting an award yes because there have been several things that have left a bad taste, but I didn't post this to air my dirty laundry, I was just simply looking for advice. Thanks all for the numerous replies. Most were pretty entertaining, and a few were even helpful.
Awards
ETS/EAS
Advice
Edited 9 y ago
Posted 9 y ago
Responses: 350
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Is this a big deal now? I was an infantry company commander back in the 80s. If I learned that one of my NCOs requested no ETS award, I would say no problem, fine with me, tell the S-1, and wouldn't give it a second thought. If the S-1 processed it anyway, well then I guess the old man overruled me and you will get your award, soldier. This is the Army, not a democracy. Accept it in a dignified manner.
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I had a guy in my unit in Fort Benning who did three tours in Viet Nam. He got out for a few years and came back in. He worked running a range while he was here due to some medical issues. As a SSG, the unit gave him an AAM as his retirement award. If it were me, I would have thrown that in their faces, but he sucked it up and walked across the stage to collect it. I guess, by that time, he didn't have that many f*cks to give.
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As the daughter of a soldier, I would encourage you to take it. It may not mean much to you right now, but one day your children will cherish it. My father passed away 10 years ago. He was a USMC Carlson's Raider. He had 2 Purple Hearts. After the war, he became a doctor and moved on with his life. He kept very few things from his war time days and what he did keep was lost in a fire. You see, while we were out of town burying him, some scum broke into my parent's house. This person flicked a cigarette onto their mattress and the whole house and everything in it burned down. I recently filed a request to get his records from his service and replace his awards so I could make a memory box for my son. Those "little" awards mean the world to us.
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I just ETS my unit was just to lazy to write an ETS award for me even being at FORT RILEY. The reason was because I didn't have a PT test. But that is just some BS to cover for how fucked they are. Because I had surgery in September so I couldn't take one. When my Commander and first line told the reason why I wouldn't be getting one I told them both out right it's OK because I can't use that in the civilian world. Shit the GS jobs won't even look at them.
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Sounds like you're not having a good experience; you hope to put it all behind you and move on. Yet it is usually SOP for most units to issue awards. A friend of mine at his retirement said, "I don't deserve this award...but I'll accept it for all the awards I deserved and didn't get." Be gracious and take what you're given. It might just look good on your resume.
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From someone who never received one, through no fault of their own; accept it and be gracious. What happens to it when you leave the room is entirely up to you.
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Wait, some replies were *helpful*?!?!?
Alright, guys and gals, someone fucked up, big-time! You all *know* that being helpful is forbidden!
Lol! Glad you found a few ideas. Good luck in your transition active-duty to veteran.
Alright, guys and gals, someone fucked up, big-time! You all *know* that being helpful is forbidden!
Lol! Glad you found a few ideas. Good luck in your transition active-duty to veteran.
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I will share the story of my so called ETS award. My Platoon Sergeant actually took the time to put me in for a MSM. The bullets were strong and quantified. To make a long story short the BC summarily downgraded it to a COA. So we have the final formation and I was presented it. I said thank you, saluted and all that. Once we were dismissed I calmly and quietly ripped it up and tossed it in the trash. I didn't make a scene, although I wanted to. I just didn't want to give them any reason to try and slap me with UCMJ right before getting out. It was basically a slap in the face under the guise of giving an award. I would have rather got nothing at all, at least I could respect the CoC for being honest. I also felt kind of bad for my NCO, who had spend a great deal of time writing it up. In the end it all worked out. I found a great career as an Army civilian and am loving it. I had a bad taste when I got out too, but that was another life lol.
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Sgt Gustavo Soto
The hell with the award! At least you know you deserved the MSM, and they or no one can't take that from you! Drive on and congrats!
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For one, in moving on to the civilian sector, you better figure out what you've done or you won't be able to furnish a resume. Secondly, you will never get promoted, much less, earn a pay raise, because they expect you to document what you've done for them yearly! Having been passed over for two PCS awards for not requesting or pushing was a mistake on my part. Would have added to my already simple load I had upon my medical retirement pre 9/11. You must learn that no one is going to take care of you, but you! Bad taste or not, take your earned award if you did... If you didn't, explain to your Command why you didn't earn it so they can improve those things upon your departure! As far as the other smartassed conjectures here, ignore them and move on!
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SP5 Paul Riley
I threw all that shit away except one challenge coin, my unit was so fucked up the only I wanted was my retirement papers and my education benefits. And I still got fucked. Been retired over 5 years and they lowered my disability rate from 80 to 50. I threw my awards away in front of my command and walked outside and smoked a cigar. And don't call me a shitbag because I did that, I was a good NCO and did a lot of favors for officers and NCO's who didn't know my name when I got a field grade for rolling my eyes at a incompetent E7 from the Army Reserves. I am not as bitter as I used to be. Buts that's age.
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AFAIK, you can't clear without one, or a memo justifying why you aren't eligible to get one.
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I have a few awards and things like that myself that i didnt care for but still accepted not for me but for my kids. I have 3 kids and they are to young to understand what these awards mean but someday when they are older i want them to know what there father did big or small and know that they can be proud of their father so in my opinion take the award worst case scenario you put it in a file folder that takes up minimal space and toss it in your military trunk and lock it away for when they want to onow more about you. Like many on this post have said its not just about you so much as it is about your loved ones.
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Just take whatever award they give you, salute smartly and put it in the box with whatever gear you're gonna keep when you get out. Before I retired, our S1 informed me that I needed to write up my retirement award and have it to him by such-and-such date. My response made it clear to him that awards really weren't that important to me so he could just let the chips fall wherever. He ended up writing up the award. My plan was to quietly sign out and go home to the swamps, but in the 101st the retirement ceremony was mandatory in those days. I was proud to see how many of our young troopers came to the ceremony, though. Awards may not mean much to you, but they do to the troops you serve with. They know who really does or does not deserve recognition anyway, so making some sort of statement about the unit by refusing an award will just be preaching to the choir anyway.
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Obviously it's a "it depends" kind of thing. Take the award if it's what you deserved, however if it's an insult (for reasons like the staff officers that didn't do a damn thing are getting bronze stars and the enlisted are getting ARCOMs - been there, done that...) then it's an entirely different issue. People have jobs to do, those include writing and delivering awards. You should insist people do their jobs.
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Hey - from my foxhole, if this is an ETS award it's cumulative of all of your service. Not just this particular unit. So go ahead and take the award. Make sure that you mostly wrote about the proud accomplishments you did. Since you will be writing it yourself, that should be easy.
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Be benevolent about it and accept the award. Whether you feel it is smoke or not, not accepting it may have lasting effects, you may need a reference some day, you may need to show a trail of awesome, you never know. In the end, it is a just a piece of paper, you can take it, smile, shake a hand, toss it in the drawer...
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As you say you would want your soldiers to get credit. Seems someone in your chain of command felt the same way and IMHO you should feel the same as when you recommended one of your soldiers for an award. Take it be gracious and then if you wish file it. These things may mean something to you later. Had a certificate when I left the Army in 1970 with the presidents signature on it years later he was gracious enough to sign over the top of the printed signature. Now I cherish it. Dutch DeGroot MSG, USAF, (ret)
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I never got an ETS award but I did throw away all the awards I got in OIF right after I received them. I am retired now and I would do it again.
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Awards are supposed to be for service rendered and the level rendered, sometimes the award is downgraded for mutiple reasons. At the end of your duty if you get an award taken it and move out. Will civilians care? Maybe maybe not it's all.in how you word your resume. But most of the time a civilian doesn't know the difference between and AAM and a MSM, it's on your writing skills. You didn't serve for awards, you know what you did, don't discredit your service by leaving on a bad note.
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