What keeps you going when you start to lose hope in the military?

2021-07-28T23:05:06-04:00

Since taking the time to switch over to commissioned after a decade of enlisted time, I have uncovered a whole new world of good and bad things about my beloved Army. Unfortunately, it is has nudged me into the camp of ole' gripers, i.e. the people who say "the Army ain't what it used to be."

I'm losing faith! There is some real BS floating around the formations. And I see outstanding men and women out there trying to handle it, but it persists like hell. Hell, I beat myself near to death with my failures to create lasting affects for my Joes. My team roots out one problem, for it to just sprout and grow somewhere else. Maybe the problem IS me? I hope it's just my naivety being torn apart as I progress, or perhaps it's my unit's unique flavor of BS (the crap that smells the worst is the one you're stepping in after all), but maybe there really are systemic trends from the past decade or so and we do have bigger problems?

But I don't ask the question to talk about the negatives. I want to know what keeps you going. I want to know what keeps you grounded and where you draw inspiration from when it comes to the success of the U.S. military and it's service members. This is a people-based question, if you're thinking politics then you may have the wrong starting point. What makes our military great is the same thing that makes our country great: the heart and soul of the Americans inside of it.

Each branch experiences this in their own way, I'm sure. Please share your thoughts. I feel like I am running off fumes. I'm Charlie-Mike with all guts and no heart.

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 28 at 2021 11:09 PM

2021-07-28T23:09:02-04:00

1LT Private RallyPoint Member Faith in God.

Response by LTC John Mohor made Jul 28 at 2021 11:11 PM

2021-07-28T23:11:32-04:00

You’ve got to work toward taking care of your people and accomplishing each mission to the best of your ability and not worrying about who gets or takes the credit. Selfless service runs deep in order to keep going

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 29 at 2021 12:42 AM

2021-07-29T00:42:52-04:00

As a leader we are there to lead our Soldiers. There will always be issues. I have yet to come to a unit that doesn't have any issues. Even when I was a civilian, every workplace had issues. It is about how we deal with them. I would consider himself a Stoic. I adhere and study Stoic philosophy. I would try to build your resilience more than trying to fix every problem. This is an issue I wrote about when I was in my Captain Career Course. The mental health of our leaders is often an afterthought. I can say that studying Stoicism has really made a difference for me.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 29 at 2021 2:15 AM

2021-07-29T02:15:55-04:00

The always Ain't what it used to be.

When I joined in 98 it was a hard Army. You had to run a 11:54 two mile, 82 Pushups and 92 sit-ups to max the 17-21 age category, which was the hardest category. I would get smoked for hours just for being alive, so that my body would be strong. Promotions weren't called STEP, you just didn't promote till you finished your NCOES.

When I went to Ranger school in 99 you couldn't have camelbacks, or knee pads, or non issue boots, but the RI's griped that it was so much easier because we got two MREs a day and they only got one. Our entire leadership failed a patrol because the company commander called a safety index and recycled everyone. We graduated looking like cancer survival patients

When I returned to deploy with the Guard in 04 people said it wasn't the Pre-millenial Army it used to be because now the APFT standards were easier.

When I joined Active Duty and was in The Surge people said it wasn't the Army it used to be because it was impossible to kick dirt bags out. We had AWOLS, people who were so fat they stayed E2s for years, people with criminal records, etc. But everyone deployed like clockwork every two years. NCOES requirements were rolled back and suddenly you had 21 year old SSGs who didn't know how to lead and everyone said it wasn't like the old Army where leaders were actually experienced.

Then I went to work at Ranger School in 2009 and the RI's griped it wasn't as hard as it used to be. Students could wear elbow pads and kneed pads, they had camelbacks, they had 240s that actually fired instead of the old M60s. They had the new lightweight tripods, not the old 35 pound clunkers. We gave the students Hooah bars and Cera sport electrolyte drinks. RI's needed more justification to fail someone on their patrols and a student needed less Go's to graduate and students didn't look like they left a concentration camp when they graduated.

Then we started reducing the force in 2013. Some idiots ended up killing some Soldiers during promotion and suddenly it was hazing to punch someone's rank into their chest. Somehow that started to become all physical corrective training equals hazing, and everyone said the Army is getting soft. The Army re-implemented QMP and booting leaders who had messed up and had not been separated before. People said it's not like the old Army, but QMP was a decades old program.

Then NCOES requirements get re-implemented and everyone thinks it's new, even though it's been the standard for decades, and they say it's not like the Old Army.

The Army will always continue to change, when you are no longer able to adapt to it and change with it, you are no longer relevant. The people who gripe that it's not what it used to be are choosing to be irrelevant rather than adapt. In my personal opinion this is one of the greatest issues that hold some vets back, stuck in the glory days of their service, but that's just a personal observation.

What keeps most of us going is the people we work with. But for everyone there comes a time when you say enough is enough and you move on. If you ask most retirees they'll tell you that most of them hit a point where they just knew it was time. If you haven't hit that point, just remember that you are helping someone else, growing the next generation, teaching them how to lead so they can make the organization better for the people that follow them in the distant future

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 29 at 2021 6:21 AM

2021-07-29T06:21:11-04:00

The main thing that keeps me going, if nothing else, is the fact that I'm 10 years in. One way or another I'll push throw the second half and hit that retirement mark.

Other than that, being able to lead and teach troops gives me a moral boost when I'm feeling low. Knowing I'm doing what I can to make an impact in the lives and careers of fellow soldiers.

A drill sergeant or maybe my CO in basic told me during our final ruck March that the reason you stay in may not be the reason you joined. And that's definitely true in my case.

I try and hunt the good stuff and all that jazz they teach in MRT.

Response by CSM Darieus ZaGara made Jul 29 at 2021 6:47 AM

2021-07-29T06:47:58-04:00

For me it was always simple, it was just as easy to explain to my peers and Soldiers. When changes in regulation and policy change you have to ask yourself two simple questions; can I follow the orders of those appointed over me, and can I do that while ensuring my Soldiers and their Families are being taken care of in executing those orders.

If not, get out.

Don't get me wrong, there is a lot of soul-searching that comes as part of answering these question, but it is relatively simple.

Response by 1SG Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 29 at 2021 7:15 AM

2021-07-29T07:15:13-04:00

What kept me going was my family and friends. Before I knew it, 20 years passed and retirement came.

Response by SSG Edward Tilton made Jul 29 at 2021 8:57 AM

2021-07-29T08:57:36-04:00

Go out and kill something, blow something up, act like a soldier. Pillaging is good

Response by SSG Edward Tilton made Jul 29 at 2021 9:03 AM

2021-07-29T09:03:44-04:00

You joined to blow things up

Response by MAJ Matthew Arnold made Jul 29 at 2021 12:22 PM

2021-07-29T12:22:21-04:00

Maybe it's time to remind yourself why you do it. If you're called to protect the herd (no matter how dumb they are) then you'll work thru the irritations of the system best suited to do that mission -- The Army.

Response by CSM William Everroad made Jul 29 at 2021 12:51 PM

2021-07-29T12:51:42-04:00

1LT Private RallyPoint Member Every time a Soldier who has worked hard and developed themselves, gets promoted;
Every time an engineer graduates Sapper after train-up and mentorship;
Every time an NCO joined the ranks of the Senior Enlisted after years of sled-development and reflection;

Basically, every time the Army pays off for doing stuff the Army way.

SFC Private RallyPoint Member mentioned that some things haven't really changed in the Army and I agree. The one constant is that if you work on yourself, know what the regs say, and try it the doctrine way first, you will most likely be successful. Where leaders goof up is when they start skipping steps or doing it the way they were "taught", or making up an easier way.

The other challenge is Soldier care. I have leaders who execute coddling operations under the cloak of Soldier care. But they really aren't doing them any favors. There is a right way to expose Soldiers to an austere environment and there is a wrong way. By leaders not planning for enhanced training, they most always do it the wrong way, resulting in Soldier care issues.

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 29 at 2021 1:53 PM

2021-07-29T13:53:00-04:00

So you’re 4 years behind me in reflection, and it reminded me what was the thorn in my side when I was a PL.

The observations only get worse as you go up the ladder.

Keep you head on a swivel and always act on things brought to your attention that are in your lane.

As mentioned if you develop yourself you will be rewarded, but it doesn’t come freely. Manage your OER and record brief.

Mediocrity is rewarded.

I recently had a diagnostic ACFT. Basically we could have skipped the run if we wanted. Those that did the run would get a DTS entry passing diagnostic score.

My unit chaplain asked me what motivated me to finish it out. I told him I passed everything so far and I wasn’t going to fail the run. Getting a legit ACFT score in the system would set me apart.

Which leads me to my next point. Plan your next move. Have that in the horizon and it helps you deal with the nonsense directly in front of you.

Someone once told me I always new when to lead a bad employment situation. In the military that’s your next assignment or promotion.

If you are a reservist you are in a much stronger position to move yourself around as you see fit.

Response by Sgt Gene Stanton made Jul 29 at 2021 2:02 PM

2021-07-29T14:02:55-04:00

I get the feeling that the Armed forces of today are becoming more and more politicized. There are divisive tactics being employed from the top down (The CIC and his appointed minions) that include CRT, and questioning your ability to serve based on your political beliefs, liberal or conservative with the latter being associated with White Supremacy. I pray I am wrong, but the winds from the Capital are afoul with the stink of communism and when you have a stand down in the middle of growing tensions with the Chinese I have to wonder. I would also be very careful as to make any comments that let your political leanings become apparent as these posts will be monitored and could be used to remove you from serving our great country. just saying.

Response by CWO3 Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 29 at 2021 2:59 PM

2021-07-29T14:59:26-04:00

EAS

Response by Cpl Charles Ames made Jul 29 at 2021 3:32 PM

2021-07-29T15:32:49-04:00

20 and out. That's what I did.
Meanwhile you have the comfort you are doing everything you can.
If you are in a leadership role, pass on that scuttlebutt will be dealt with.
Also, do me a solid. Have your Sgt pass info AFTER the 1st formation
and BEFORE the last formation.
We'd stand for several minutes waiting for formation,
then have to be the last platoon standing there when all else are gone.

Response by SFC Casey O'Mally made Jul 29 at 2021 5:25 PM

2021-07-29T17:25:40-04:00

My DD-214!!! Retired and loving it!

But, on a more serious note, generally speaking, I was motivated by looking left and right, then down and back.

When things were TRULY shitty - and those times were many - I could look to my left and right and see people right there in the middle of the shit with me. I knew that I had a choice to quit, or to keep on pushing. And I knew that if we ALL PUSHED TOGETHER we could get through whatever we were dealing with. If I quit, not only was *I* stuck in the shit, but I was making it that much harder for my battle buddies to get out of it. That doesn't make the situation any better, it doesn't make things suck LESS, it just makes it possible to push through them.

When the shit was rolling downhill, and bad stuff was coming from on high, I looked down and then back. I looked down to see the Soldiers assigned to me. I then looked back at all the stuff I had already endured, and that I knew I could handle. Because I knew I had it in me, I did what I could to absorb as much of the shit as I could, to let the Soldiers assigned to me go on about their business and do their job with as little interference as possible.

If you are truly running on fumes, do an azimuth check with your peers. Hopefully, your peers are going strong, and will be able to help you out - either by giving you that emotional/morale/spiritual boost you need, or just giving you a couple of cool tools to help manage what you have on your plate. If your peers are also running on fumes, maybe it is time to band together, and go as a group to your Chaplain and/or your Commander. If you are anything like me and most of the Senior NCOs I served with, you are gritting your teeth and presenting a brave face to everyone, your Commander included. It is entirely possible (s)he doesn't know how bad things are, and having a heart-to-heart may change the Commander's focus, especially if the LTs are presenting a united front.

The above can help with the individual situations, but they help less with the day-to-day grind.

I reclassed to 35M in 2007. I retired in 2017. Of those 10 years, I spent approximately 2 years doing 35M jobs. I was pretty miserable for most of those 10 years. But I had two things that kept me grinding. First, the retirement at the end of the tunnel. Getting to 20 and getting that paycheck for life, plus SUPER cheap insurance for my family was definitely something worth pushing on for. Second, the last potential solution I can offer is to take refuge in the job. I went in everyday determined that each and every day, I would make progress on SOMETHING. And each and every day, at the end of the day, I made myself look back and say "I did that today." Some days those things were significant (Publishing strategic plans or tracking down missing equipment). Some days those things were menial (updated the training tracker). But every single day that I went to work, I made sure that I did *something* to "earn my paycheck" that day, and I made sure that I acknowledged it to myself.

It may sound silly. It may sound small and meaningless. But sometimes that is all you can do, and it *does* make a difference.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 29 at 2021 5:56 PM

2021-07-29T17:56:11-04:00

My daughter is the only reason I'm still in and why I'm pushing to retirement because TRICARE has covered everything she's needed. If she didn't have all the issues she has, I'd have been gone 7 years ago.

Response by LTC Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 30 at 2021 1:36 PM

2021-07-30T13:36:37-04:00

The Army was never "what it used to be".

What keeps me going? A competitive compensation package.

Response by Sgt Dale Briggs made Jul 30 at 2021 4:19 PM

2021-07-30T16:19:34-04:00

It's tough right now imo, your dealing with the “woke” generation of young men and women, entitled, empowered, inexperienced, I suppose DIs and 1st LTs in 1968 felt the same way. All you can do is the best you can do for the right reasons, your not a miracle worker.

Response by Cpl Joseph Roberts made Jul 30 at 2021 5:53 PM

2021-07-30T17:53:24-04:00

The focus shouldn't be the problems, they will always be there. Focus on making the right changes with the information and authority you possess. Your positive influence on those around you should help lift you up. (If your problems are a few bad apples, you may not be able to focus on their improvement, so much as the improvement of those they negatively affect, by removing or addressing them. )

A quote from my daughter's current favorite movie, "...just do the next right thing. " - Frozen 2

Response by COL Vincent Stoneking made Jul 31 at 2021 4:45 PM

2021-07-31T16:45:31-04:00

It has changed a lot, some for the better, some not so much. I'll leave it there to keep the politics out of it AND because becoming a gripe-fest, or even a 1-upping "well back in the day" isn't .... useful. I'll say google the phrase "lying to ourselves" sometime and leave it at that.

So I'll focus on what is useful, from the perspective of an old, fat, retired Colonel.
- things change, same as it ever was. Some of those changes feel like an improvement now, some feel like they're worse. In another 5 years, you may change your mind about which is which.
- "today's youth" are always soft. They said that about the guys who were drafted for WW2, as well.
- Remember why you joined. Is that reason still valid? Does it still light a spark in your eye?
I joined for patriotism and giving back to what I honestly considered - and still consider - the be the best, most unique country on earth in a real, tangible way. With the exception of a few really low points, I felt like I did that for almost 32 years (mostly reserves). Sometimes I pushed some really cool improvements, sometimes I felt like the little dutch boy. But for me the striving was important
- Focus on your spheres of control and influence. Set objectives for what YOU can contribute to the Army overall. And then try to do that. The institutional, long-term focus makes it easier to put up with the day-to-day bullshit.
- Actually use some of those tools that we pencil-whip in the way they were originally intended. I'm thinking here of the OER support form, IDPs, the AR &PAM on career development (sorry, too long gone, don't have regs memorized anymore). Instead of whipping through them and "getting to done." take a weekend or two and actually go through them and use some of that discernment that they pay us the Officer bucks for to come up with actual plans, do some backwards planning, and implement them. I STILL have an IDP that I maintain and update every six months or so. It is a fantastic tool. The only difference now is that the "professional" part has no Army stuff in it anymore.
- Don't be afraid to aggressively pursue your own career and opportunities. The Army is, practically speaking, a job and a career once you're past 10 years. There is no sin in managing your career to line up the opportunities and experiences your want (again, check out the career development regs). It shouldn't need to be said, but it probably does for at least one reader out there - focusing on your career doesn't mean shirking your duties or being an ass. Don't be an ass. And sometimes you may feel compelled to do things that are considered "career limiting". If that happens, so be it, just go in with your eyes open.
- Again, do everything possible to look at the Army with an institutional view. It's really easy to focus on "your foxhole", but it's really "the battlefield" that matters long term.
- Volunteer. I'm gonna say that again.... Volunteer. Some of the things you volunteer for may be shit, but it DOES get you noticed in a positive way as an Officer.
- Tatoo the serenity prayer on the inside of your eyelids. There are always going to be too many things for you to focus on all of them. Pick your battles/hills. Accept which things are outside of your sphere of control. When you've influenced your sphere of influence as well as you could, let it go. For things that are only in your sphere of concern... Breath in, Breath out, Move on.
- Self-Care. Seriously. If you work yourself into the ground, people will let you. And when you get tired, you will go from the Hero to the Zero overnight. Don't be that guy. You can, and should, love the Army. Just don't imagine it loves you. Think about that guy who was your commander 7 years ago. Is (s)he even relevant to your life today? DON'T burn yourself out! (I'm still trying to learn this one).
- Going back to the IDP, always have a plan B. And C-Z. Shit happens. Do some of that branch and sequel stuff. ;-)

On a really practical note, assuming you are active and NOT on the BRS, have a fallback for a bad MAJ board. If the last 20 (30, 40, 50...) years have taught us ANYTHING, it's that you shouldn't count on accurately predicting what the Army's Officer manning requirements will be in the future. MAJ should continue to have a sky-high selection rate, but plan for if it doesn't. This may look like putting together a SELCON packet, having a Warrant packet in your pocket, reverting to enlisted for the last year or 2, or even just a good exit plan for going civilian (maybe grab a TWI opportunity if it comes up).
If you're reserves (I'm a bit unclear of current status based on your assignments), all the same, applies, as well as the potential for IRR, DIMA, mobilizations, etc. NOTE: Despite what is sometimes assumed, you still need "good years" in the IRR to get to 20, as well as "good years" to avoid being moved into the retired reserve, which will directly affect your pension (first-hand close-call on that one!)

Response by SMSgt Bob Wilson made Aug 1 at 2021 4:42 PM

2021-08-01T16:42:33-04:00

Two things: [1] Retired or [2] ETS

Response by LTC Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 1 at 2021 8:50 PM

2021-08-01T20:50:33-04:00

I suspect each generation believes the Army isn't what it used to be. The hard boys told me that the jump school I graduated from in '92 was a pleasure cruise. In '93 the AAS school in Camp Gruber still had never graduated a female soldier. The battalion commander would still show up to our keggers (with someone on his arm that was at least semi-pro) and a SFC could send shivers up your spine. Were they the gold ol' days, no. It was the just the way it was. We had no TP in the barracks and we may have had only a few dozen rounds of 155mm for a 9 day field problem. We worked hard and we were worked hard. You earned everything. You learned life could change in an instant. You figured out who to respect and who you never wanted to become. As a medic, I knew my place in the world.

When I became an officer, I was surprised how much being prior enlisted was a discriminator. Some officers will never really trust you because you can smell the bullshit and lived enough to know toxic horseshit when you see it. I was older than many of similar rank and I have no illusions of glorious future promotions. For me, it will always be a balancing act of trying to bite my tongue and knowing what hills to die on. I have had lean years where I felt like I was the problem and the boss didn't really want me to "give it to him straight" like he asked.

In the end, for me at least, I know why I serve. That doesn't always make it easier. I would love to see one of my medics earn the EFMB. I would love to see one of my 68W become a PA. There are days I think I am just hanging on long enough to train my replacement. The moments that make it worth it are infrequent, but make it all worth while. I have gotten emails from medics who used the skills we taught them to thank us. I have served long enough to see guys I cared for become grandparents. I still believe, despite it all. I ask myself this one question. Will someone else be better in my boots or do I have something the next generation needs? If you have transferred all the lessons entrusted to you to the next generation, feel free to walk away. If you haven't, dig deep, and pay it forward.

I promise the promotions will be slow, and often go to less deserving people. I suspect the awards will be infrequent and the work largely thankless. Fortunately, none of that really matters. I do what I do because someone taught me, and trusted me to carry the tradition. I apprenticed in the game of life and death and with it came great responsibility to pass the knowledge on.

Take 2 minutes and read "If" by Rudyard Kipling. I find it does help in taking a deep breath, refocusing on what is truly important, and then soldier the fuck on. P.M. if I can help.

Response by MSG Michael McKenzie made Aug 4 at 2021 3:17 PM

2021-08-04T15:17:50-04:00

A ton of great advice here and much of it is what I would give, so I won't repeat what has already been said. I used to tell me Soldiers you may not like where you are at, but do you still like what you are doing? If the answer is yes, you are good to go. Also, if you still enjoy putting on the uniform, hope is not lost. I retired because I fell out of love with what I was doing, but I'd do it all over again. Like SFC Boyd said, you'll know when you are truly done. Until then, keep pushing and know that the only constant is change.

Response by CPT Larry Hudson made Sep 1 at 2021 4:47 PM

2021-09-01T16:47:16-04:00

Patrotice duty, pride in country, desire to make a differance

Response by SSG Shawn Mcfadden made Sep 15 at 2021 1:54 PM

2021-09-15T13:54:28-04:00

The only thing that keeps me going is the fact that I served my Country as honorably as I can.