What practical jokes did your unit pull on new privates?

2021-09-09T15:30:44-04:00

Being in the Field Artillery Line, I had to do what was called the "BOOM Check". This involed me getting my face in the rear of the gun and yelling "Boom" as loud as I can, the reasoning was to check for cracks in the barrel, needless to say this brought a lot of laughs from those that have had to do this as well. I got creative with my jokes, my two favorites were having a private go to the 1st Sergeant asking for a ID10-T form so they can get grid squares from the supply Sergeant, and asking the maintenance bay for blinker fluid for the humvees.

Response by SGT David A. 'Cowboy' Groth made Sep 9 at 2021 3:34 PM

2021-09-09T15:34:14-04:00

The usual ones , go to supply for light bulb repair kits, maintenance for 5 pound cans of compressed air, the normal hyginks brother CPL Adam Schoenwald

Response by SSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 9 at 2021 3:46 PM

2021-09-09T15:46:34-04:00

I was in the Comm Plt so we had a few twists of nomenclature and requests:
Fetch me a BA-eleven-hundred November with a Sierra-Tango-ring attachment (BA1100N STRING)
Need you to fill out our ID-ten-Tango form before checking out comm gear (ID10T form)
Our tech needs a set of fallopian tubes to repair the PRC-77. Get to supply and requisition them.

Response by PO2 Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 9 at 2021 3:57 PM

2021-09-09T15:57:00-04:00

For the new CMs we would have them looking for muffler bearings.

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 9 at 2021 3:57 PM

2021-09-09T15:57:30-04:00

Go get a Spool of Flight Line from Supply,
Collect Exhaust Samples,
Go Get Chem-Light Batteries from supply,
Pull Start a humvee using the steering wheel lock
Tell the Readiness NCO I'm looking for the "Pricky 7" (Prick E-7) *ONLY DO THIS IF YOU HAVE GOOD RAPPORT WITH THE NCO LMAO*
I'll add more as i remember them...

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 9 at 2021 4:08 PM

2021-09-09T16:08:34-04:00

Go to 1SG and ask him to sign a ID-10-T form for you so you can get you BA-115 requisitioned - make sure you write it on you hand so you don't forget.

Tape up old targets so they can be used again.

Response by SSG Edward Tilton made Sep 9 at 2021 4:16 PM

2021-09-09T16:16:48-04:00

From the Breach Block I assume. Bigger the gun the better

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 9 at 2021 4:24 PM

2021-09-09T16:24:46-04:00

Duct taped the drunk SOB to his bed and put the bed on top of foot lockers.

Response by MSG Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 9 at 2021 4:31 PM

2021-09-09T16:31:09-04:00

Sent my ex wife (gf at the time) to supply to get some ID-10-T forms. Had FNGs banging on the 113 looking for soft spots. The usual.

Response by SMSgt Henry Kiester made Sep 9 at 2021 4:34 PM

2021-09-09T16:34:22-04:00

Not privates, Airmen Basics - send them to get a can of K9-P.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 9 at 2021 5:03 PM

2021-09-09T17:03:52-04:00

We have the new guys check for soft spots on the M113's and the last set I had collect exhaust samples in large black trash bags to take to the supply SGT for the Hi-back! LOL ... New PVTs are the best part of my drill weekend!!! Got a new one coming this weekend ... should be a great time all around. I think it helps them and us to get to know each other better, breaks the ice and helps everyone laugh and come together ...

Response by SPC Kevin Ford made Sep 9 at 2021 5:56 PM

2021-09-09T17:56:02-04:00

When I was in the S-2 shop of an aviation battalion the joke was to sent them to the flight line for a bucket of rotor wash.

Response by MSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 9 at 2021 5:58 PM

2021-09-09T17:58:29-04:00

We would have them go get a yard of flight line, a gallon of prop wash, or a bottle of K9P (K9 pee).

Response by CW4 Guy Butler made Sep 9 at 2021 5:59 PM

2021-09-09T17:59:24-04:00

Lanyard grease and collimator batteries.

Response by SFC Jaysin Smith made Sep 9 at 2021 6:12 PM

2021-09-09T18:12:59-04:00

MRE heater bombs! Icy hot underwear! And atomic sit ups.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 9 at 2021 6:20 PM

2021-09-09T18:20:36-04:00

Send them to the head shed to find the PRC-E8.

Black smoke for night helicopter operations because white smoke will whiteout the NODs.

Response by SSgt Jim Gilmore made Sep 9 at 2021 7:19 PM

2021-09-09T19:19:01-04:00

Starting out as an aircraft mechanic we all got got and got others too. Rookies would be sent to get a left handed monkey wrench, 25 feet of flight line, a couple of gallons of prop wash and my person favorite was a gag we'd pull on the B-52.

We'd get a rookie to sit in the navigator ejection seat. This seat was over the crew entry hatch and the bomb-nav seat was similar. We'd rig some BS test to get a kid in the seat. Both the lower ejection seats had leg restraint systems. It kept you from traumatic amputation in case of bail out.

Once we got the rookie in the seat, the egress troop would tell him to move his feet back...further and further until the leg restraint would activate. When that happened we'd scream don't move you'll blow the seat.

We'd let them sweat for a minute before releasing the restraints and telling the rookie he was never in any danger since we made sure the seat pins were all properly in place.

Response by MAJ Ken Landgren made Sep 9 at 2021 7:32 PM

2021-09-09T19:32:16-04:00

My platoon set me up one dark night. The bastards gave me NVGs without batteries. I could not maneuver my tank because I could not see the terrain. I know they set me up because the other 3 tank commanders cackled over the radio telling me to go there and there. They got me good.

Response by SPC Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 9 at 2021 7:34 PM

2021-09-09T19:34:30-04:00

When I was a PVT, I got sent to Supply to get a box of grid squares. Now, I'm not stupid. So I asked for a map and a small cardboard box. When I had said map, I cut out EVERY INDIVIDUAL SQUARE, and put them in the box. I then put the margins in a small plastic bag and taped it to the bottom of the box. I turned this in to my PSG and he about fell out of his chair laughing. My squad leader made me low-crawl around the CTA for about an hour, and I got a statement of charges for the map. But they never asked me for something stupid again, and I feel like I earned some respect

Response by LTC David Brown made Sep 9 at 2021 7:44 PM

2021-09-09T19:44:06-04:00

I worked with a Neuro surgeon who started out as an enlisted OR tech. He got his bachelor degree after hours etc went to med school then did a Neuro surgical residency. He knew three or four names for every piece of equipment. Part way through a case he would ask the scrub tech for a “hen way”. The surgeon would appear to be anxious for a “hen way” asking for several times. The scrub tech would at this point ask “ what’s a hen way”, the surgeon would say “ about 3 lbs”. Everybody would laugh and get on with the work at hand. One day we had two techs in training, one scrubbed in one observing . The surgeon starts in with the hen way. The guy scrubbed in looks at his buddy observing. His buddy runs out to the front desk and asks the chief nurse for a hen way. The chief nurse was not amused, first time in a long time the surgeon pranked himself

Response by MAJ Byron Oyler made Sep 9 at 2021 7:44 PM

2021-09-09T19:44:13-04:00

I sent a nurse cadet to the lab looking for fallopian tubes. He was a good sport and I gave him my $25 2LT dress blue shoulder boards.

Response by CPL Douglas Chrysler made Sep 9 at 2021 8:36 PM

2021-09-09T20:36:51-04:00

Anybody remember the square needle conversations before required shots?

Response by SSgt Tyler Rapsey made Sep 9 at 2021 8:51 PM

2021-09-09T20:51:18-04:00

Have the new guy ask the Chief Master Sgt where the PRC E-9 (“battery”) was, lol.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 9 at 2021 8:55 PM

2021-09-09T20:55:34-04:00

Edward 40 hands: 100mph tape 2 40oz bottles to their hands, when done you remove the tape. Sounds easy...try it and see how long till you have to pee.

Also more run of the mill stuff like drop zone keys.

Response by SSG Lew Wilson made Sep 9 at 2021 9:29 PM

2021-09-09T21:29:51-04:00

wasn't a private but just as funny.
we were in England training with the brits, i was an M-60 gunner so while over there they put me on a GPM i wasn't allowed to fire on certain ranges so the LT hands me his SLR and says go fire some up Willy. make sure you clean the rifle when your done and oil it up good as well. being the new PFC to the platoon i did what he said except I dumped about a 1/2 bottle of LSA in the weapon. i had just finished oiling it and he come by saying hey give me back my rifle I'm on line in about 1 minute. i handed him his rifle , he never checked it. when he came back he has oil and carbon all over his face. 1 rule on their ranges was no camo, a brit Major saw him with all the carbon on his face made him do push ups for wearing cameo. he was pissed at me for a long time but since he has told me " oil her up good Willey" he couldn't punish me

Response by SPC Terry Page made Sep 9 at 2021 9:48 PM

2021-09-09T21:48:43-04:00

I was in the Commo Section where we use tools like TL-13 (Wire-Cutting and stripping pliers) and a TL-29 (Knife/Screw-driver). We would send a new guy off to requisition a ST-1 for the project at hand <STONE>.

Response by PFC Andrew "Tommy" M. made Sep 10 at 2021 1:14 AM

2021-09-10T01:14:26-04:00

Change summer air in tires for winter air, or vice versa.
Ask maint. Sgt. for sparkplugs for 5ton truck, and elbow grease.
Get the sky hook out of the conex.

Response by MSG Greg Kelly made Sep 10 at 2021 7:13 AM

2021-09-10T07:13:30-04:00

Oh we would love to send them into the CO XO or 1SG offices looking for boxes of grid squares, grid line makers, sand bag ties, protractor covers, but the real dumb ones we would always send to 1SG asking for a prick E8 battery that was the best. LOL

My Favorite was my 1SG giving a bunch of cadets a map reading class. about half got lost. So they needed more training. One of them pissed 1SG off he said as nicely as could to him to get up walk to a small sapling and told him to shake it. The cadet did. 1SG said shake it harder then he told the other cadets to look for the shaking sapling on their maps. And every head dropped to look.

Response by SGM Steve Wettstein made Sep 10 at 2021 8:03 AM

2021-09-10T08:03:27-04:00

When I was at MWD school at Lackland, one of the instructors told a young Airman to get some flight line to tie up the dogs so we can clean out the kennel runs. Laughed my ass off once he was out of sight.

Response by MAJ Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 10 at 2021 10:36 AM

2021-09-10T10:36:29-04:00

When I was a company XO, I would get the new LTs with the ID-10T form joke, or "I need you to go sign for the keys to the indoor mortar range."

Response by SSG James Knopp made Sep 10 at 2021 11:57 AM

2021-09-10T11:57:53-04:00

My military career was split between being a “grunt” and an “aviator”. After spending 8 years as a civilian I decided my heart belonged to serving my country.
Life in an aviation unit became as a shock to me after learning infantry tactics and thinking. Down and dirty was what I was used to and when I came to the aviation side of the house I was amazed how “clean and tidy” the maintenance side of aviation kept things. If something was misplaced the helicopter didn’t fly until whatever it was was found. You can’t have possible FOD floating around to get caught up in the complexity of a flying machine.
Anyway, when I was picking something up in parts I was told to pick up the “air bearing grease” and take it to the mechanics

Response by CWO3 Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 11 at 2021 12:06 PM

2021-09-11T12:06:16-04:00

Often it was a scavenger hunt. See S-1 for an ID10T card. Check Supply for a mile of flight line, or a gallon of bubbles used in mortar sights. I never experienced any directly.

Response by SPC Richard Rauenhorst made Oct 30 at 2021 12:33 PM

2021-10-30T12:33:35-04:00

A new image analyst had a roll of film that had a lot of clouds on it so we told him we were all out of cloud eradicator and sent him to supply to get some more. LOL