What's the funniest thing one of your guys said to the CO when arriving to his new duty station?

CPO Joseph Grant — Tue, 21 Jul 2015 19:18:02 -0400

I had a RM3(SU) who caught the CO on the pier. I introduced him, CO says welcome aboard and my RM3 says he doesn't want to be on a submarine, his recruiter lied to him and he wants to be a journalist. I just about died laughing.

Response by PO1 John Miller made Jul 21 at 2015 7:23 PM

PO1 John Miller — Tue, 21 Jul 2015 19:23:06 -0400

CPO Joseph Grant, as a Seaman Recruit in Deck on my first ship, I caught myself explaining to the Captain what "quarters" was. Afterwards, my Shipmates were like "Really Miller? You don't think the CAPT knows what quarters is???"

Response by SPC Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 21 at 2015 7:37 PM

SPC Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 21 Jul 2015 19:37:46 -0400

New guy needed escorting to see 1sg I'm army and top nodded to me so I walked outside about a minute later top busts out laughing (he'd left door open) everyone in area looked in to see the new guy trying to draw a signal flow out for a computer when top had asked him what he did (was in a infantry unit top had computer technology bachelors degree so he was laughing) when top stopped laughing he said I meant as your job not what you've learned. Kid was about to cry when top told him to relax and he was playing with him and welcomed him to the company and told me to make sure he was set up good

Response by LCDR Rabbah Rona Matlow made Jul 21 at 2015 7:42 PM

LCDR Rabbah Rona Matlow — Tue, 21 Jul 2015 19:42:12 -0400

Chief Grant, talk about shooting yourself in the foot...

Response by SMSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Jul 21 at 2015 9:12 PM

SMSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 21 Jul 2015 21:12:53 -0400

After our new Wing Commander took the helm and the Change of Command was over the new commander was leaving the base to take family to the airport. Being new to the base he didn't pay attention to the speed limit and subsequently got pulled over. Luckily dispatch was on top of their game and notified the patrolman who the speeder was. The patrolman let him off with a smile and a warning. A few days later this same commander had his household goods shipment held up at the gate because security forces found spice and none of the movers would take ownership. Once a relief crew arrived the cops expedited movement from the gate to his house. To the new commanders credit he joked about both situations the whole time he was CO.

Response by PO2 Peter Klein made Jul 21 at 2015 10:20 PM

PO2 Peter Klein — Tue, 21 Jul 2015 22:20:29 -0400

Four of us were in Forward IC playing Country Joe & The Fish's "Feel Like I'm Fixing To Die Rag" (not softly) and bouncing up and down with the beat when the CO came down the ladder. He stopped about a step from he bottom, looked and listened. After a moment he turned around and left. We never found out way he was there.

Response by PO1 Donald Hammond made Jul 22 at 2015 2:12 PM

PO1 Donald Hammond — Wed, 22 Jul 2015 14:12:10 -0400

Had a E-2 show up, not one of mine, and he looked at the CO and said "I think I *bleeeeeped* your daughter in high school."

On my side, the best one came when I was a civilian working at the Pearl Harbor Naval Shipyard. I got in the elevator with a full bird and saw he had dolphins and a boomer pin (shows you've done Fleet Ballistic Missile submarine cruises). It showed he had done 3 of them. I said (not knowing who he was) "Only 3 patrols? What a wimp." He says "how many did you do?" I said "11". That was it. So I thought. About a month later the shipyard commander was about to be relieved. He was promoted to 1 star and so went around to all the shops to say farewell. OMG! Yep. You guessed it. But he sees me and says "This man here is my hero." and left it at that. Everyone is still wondering what that was all about.

Response by PO1 Donald Hammond made Jul 23 at 2015 2:54 PM

PO1 Donald Hammond — Thu, 23 Jul 2015 14:54:41 -0400

Okay, not a new arrival, but we had a new CO on a submarine. His stateroom was right across from stairs going from operations upper level to middle level. This was our first "field day" with this CO. We had just pulled out on patrol. Of course 2 Radiomen were cleaning and one threw a wet sponge at another one on the stairs. CO stepped out at the wrong time and took the sponge in the face. He didn't say a word. Just asked for a paper towel and wiped his face. Towards the end of the field day the guy who had thrown the sponge was sweeping the stairs with a hand broom so was bent over. He heard the CO above him call his name. He looked up and got a face full of dirty cleaning water from a bucket. Then the CO said "Looks like you have a mess to clean up." and walked away. Best CO I ever had.

Response by MSgt Alan H made Jul 24 at 2015 3:37 AM

MSgt Alan H — Fri, 24 Jul 2015 03:37:27 -0400

I was 25 year Air Force and went from air traffic control telling fighter pilots where to go and when and being in a communications squadron that really didn't have big elaborate ceremonies when there was a change of command to aviation resource management in a fighter unit where change of commands were huge elaborate out door affairs with seating, flags, tents, receptions, fighter pilot wives...... Unfortunately my first day in the new job in the fighter squadron was the exact same day as their change of command. I didn't know anyone and showed up right at the beginning of the ceremony and a LtCol jet fighter pilot was standing next to me and we walked out to the change of command area and I guess he saw the look on my face because he asked me "what do you think about all this?" As he nodded at the rows of chairs, flags, banners, people in dress blues, tents, reception table with food and beer, and all the fighter pilot wives. I turned to him and said very matter of factly as only an airman can "sir, it lools like a lot of bull shit to go through just for a new commander!" He chuckled real deep and we kind of got lost in the crowd and I didn't see that LtCol again, until he was introduced by the old commander outgoing as the brand new incoming commander!!! We became the very best of freinds and that was my first day among fighter pilots.

Response by PO2 Art Brown made Jul 26 at 2015 12:36 PM

PO2 Art Brown — Sun, 26 Jul 2015 12:36:43 -0400

Had an unassigned seaman fresh from boot asked the XO on the pier to help carry his seabag up the gangway. He got to be wardroom steward for 6 months

Response by SPC Mike Southworth made Feb 15 at 2019 10:12 PM

SPC Mike Southworth — Fri, 15 Feb 2019 22:12:58 -0500

One of the guys I showed up with at the 82nd Airborne told the CO that GOD TOLD him to join the infantry so when we all have to live in trees, if he falls out he can land properly and protect the other tree people.