What should a Military Ball or Banquet be like?

2013-12-07T00:06:06-05:00

If we take the time to dress in our finest uniforms, shouldn't the occasion be worthy of the Uniform? Shouldn't the highest level of professionalism be on display?

The reason I ask is because having just attended one; I was disappointed at the lack of etiquette, and military bearing. Yes there is a portion where you can dance, I for one don't think that portion should involve "gettin Low" "Droppin it like its hot" or anything remotely similar.

Do it at the club all you want, but this is the Army, not "the block".

Thoughts?

Response by SSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Dec 7 at 2013 12:11 AM

2013-12-07T00:11:17-05:00

I agree totally. It seems disrespectful but that is just us, I guess.

Response by SSG Laureano Pabon made Dec 7 at 2013 12:24 AM

2013-12-07T00:24:30-05:00

I agree too Sir, the get down and boogie is for the NCO and Officers club, not a Military Ball or Banquet. I personally been to an Officers Banquet, personally invited by My battalion Commander in Germany as the photographer, I didn't see any unprofessional acts or behaviors, and like wise I been to both Officers and NCO clubs and I saw it but with respect. However the Enlistment club is a whole different story that I don't want to talk about. :)

Response by 1SG Private RallyPoint Member made Jan 20 at 2014 8:56 AM

2014-01-20T08:56:11-05:00

1LT Hooser,

I just attended a few Military Balls myself, prior to the USAREUR Engineer Castle Ball our BN XO gave an etiquette class open to all soldiers in the Battalion. Where he gave general information on proper conduct for all soldiers and spouses attending. Just his brief class showed his dedication to Customs and Courtesies after his class I felt compelled to do the same for my soldier and their spouses and even attended dance lessons for all. My soldiers had a blast without losing their military bearing and even correcting soldiers in improper dress attire.

Thanks for writing this discussion and if you want a copy of the class you send me your address I can forward it out to you.

V/R

1SG Haro

Response by CMC Robert Young made Jan 20 at 2014 9:50 AM

2014-01-20T09:50:13-05:00

LT, I too have noticed a significant loss of military decorum; the apparent inability to adhere to our respective services' traditions & heritages; and the loss of military professionalism. It's not just at formal banquets where we don our finery and look (or should look) our best but likewise at promotional & award ceremonies; at Colors in the morning and Retreat in the evenings; at formation for Pass & Review, and a host of other opportunities to demonstrate who we are as individuals or as an organization. I would offer that the cause is two fold.

First social scientist tells us that the generations from which most of our junior work force comes do not strongly identify with groups (regardless of the groups' social, community, religious or civic purpose - in other words, they are far more concerned with exercising their 'rights' as an individual as opposed to adhering to standards imposed by an organization or a collective). They've been told their whole lives that they are special (everybody gets a trophy!), and there is no way they could do anything wrong. They simply lack strong core values and feel no need to be part of something bigger than themselves. The services are a microcosm of a greater societal decline.

Secondly, for many who are and have been, committed to the higher standards required by our services, they have grown weary of repeatedly telling junior members that the members are not living up to the heritage and traditions as expected. I have seen too many mid career NCOs and officers just overwhelmed at the amount of time they must spend correcting behavioral problems born of poor working stock. It's understandable why leadership goes tired after a career of herding cats. It's hard if not impossible to overcome what people don't get as children.

Lastly, I would add that your observations regarding people not adhering to our cultural norms makes you a standard bearer for doing it right. You are on the front end of your career and will have a long time to influence the institution. Fight the good fight. Demand nothing less than adherence to those things most noble in military service and in the human character.

Response by SPC Private RallyPoint Member made Jan 20 at 2014 9:55 AM

2014-01-20T09:55:26-05:00

Sir, I use to be a command team driver at my last unit and actually had the privileged in helping the command team with the ball. I was taught by my CSM and BN CO that there is always a formal setting at the ball and a certain ceremony aspect to it, and this is to honor the traditions of the military build esprit de corps in the unit and of course everyone gets to show off the ribbons and medals that they have earned. After that you are allowed to take of your coat and dance, socialize ect. but your not suppose to get unprofessional! I've seen pictures from balls where the BN CO is on the dance floor grinding on a lower enlisted soldier. I feel like higher ranking individuals look at a ball as an opportunity to cut loose and act a fool when in all actuality it should not be perceived as such. I believe everyone should relax and have a good time but I have seen some people go a little overboard. On a personal note i agree it should be completely professional, but then think of who would want to go if everyone is up tight the entire time.

Response by 1LT Private RallyPoint Member made Jan 20 at 2014 11:09 AM

2014-01-20T11:09:23-05:00

In all sincerity and based on the stories told by some old timers long since retired, balls used to be classy only until twenty minutes into the grog. That has been my experience as well.
The pomp and ceremony in the beginning always gives way to somebody getting drunk and acting ridiculous. Fist fights, insults flung at spouses, drunk fist-fighting spouses flinging insults at the BN staff's spouses, etc.

Has anyone ever been to a ball for the entire time and not seen consistent violations of decorum? I'm talking like a four hour ball with colors ceremony, speakers, and what not.

Response by CW3 Private RallyPoint Member made Jan 20 at 2014 1:09 PM

2014-01-20T13:09:18-05:00

The formal portion of a military ball is the appropriate time (the ONLY appropriate time, in my opinion) to demand strict adherence to all the customs, courtesies, and all the other dog & pony BS that has yet to win us a single war.

As for the dancing, that portion should be removed entirely. Dancing is a form of personal expression. If some up-tight folks are going to get judgmental over someone else's dancing style, then why bother dancing at all?

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Jan 20 at 2014 3:58 PM

2014-01-20T15:58:48-05:00

I have no problem with the music when it comes to the dancing portion of a Military Ball. Of course everything before that should be professional and respectful, but you also have to have some fun.

Response by SPC David Beam made Jan 20 at 2014 4:45 PM

2014-01-20T16:45:57-05:00

Well, from the lower enlisted perspective, why would we bother going if it isn't going to be fun? I'm not going to burn $60 to sit around in my Class As eating mediocre food listening to variations of the same speeches we all have already heard. Its already hard enough to justify spending the money on it.

Response by SSG V. Michelle Woods made Jan 20 at 2014 6:03 PM

2014-01-20T18:03:43-05:00

Sir, respectfully, your ball sounds boring. Number one, I'm not going anywhere and "dropping it like it's hot"...well not anymore. Two, military balls are one of very few events that actually boost morale.

Regardless of popular belief among leadership, running 4 miles doesn't boost morale the same way it does when your BDE DCO buys your squad a shot. Im not saying to get raunchy but it's ok to lighten up a little :)

Response by CSM Private RallyPoint Member made Jan 20 at 2014 6:17 PM

2014-01-20T18:17:54-05:00

The last time I attended a formal I was so excited remembering what my last experience was boy what a complete opposite. Although I did have a good time and enjoy customs and traditions an hour of formal stuff followed by dinner followed by a thirty minute guest speaker had everyone in the room yawning for the door. I say keep the formal parts at the beginning to include guest speaker, retire the colors then bring out the grog and dance music so everyone can relax and cut loose

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Jan 20 at 2014 7:46 PM

2014-01-20T19:46:50-05:00

I think the balls are a mashup of traditions. We as a whole have lost the traditions that once were the dining out and dining in. I personally think grog, Mr Vice, and skits have no place in a Ball. And vice-versa, no spouses, unless members of the unit should attend a dining in.

Commands have catered to the whining of spouses over the years and merged two things that never should have even been combined.

Response by CPT(P) Private RallyPoint Member made Jan 20 at 2014 11:55 PM

2014-01-20T23:55:25-05:00

I am extremely fortunate in that every ball and dining out I have been to has been incredible. Last year's statewide ball, our TAG was inducted into the Order of the Minuteman, after 51 years of service he was retiring with many honors. The CSM of the ARNG returned home to Oregon for this event. TAGs opening line was about the 5 Soldiers he lost as a troop commander in Vietnam. Class to the extreme. Nothing untoward happens at the ball, at least here...but it also is not conducted like a dining out/in.

Dining Out 2012 was special as it was the 20th anniversary of the dining out for this unit. There were a lot of old timers there, a general, some other interesting people, and yes, booze. The grog is quite the tradition. There are plenty of uniform corrections, and shenanigans. It keeps Soldiers on their toes, and they LOVE trying to catch their leaders out of uniform or in some other kind of violation. I find dining out to be a huge morale boost, as long as everyone shows up for formation the next day.

Response by LTJG Private RallyPoint Member made Jan 21 at 2014 4:17 AM

2014-01-21T04:17:36-05:00

Sir,

Having been to MANY balls (Marine Corps Balls, Navy Balls, British Balls, New Years Black-Tie events, and many Embassy-hosted diplomatic Black-Tie events) I can tell you that it is the intended audience that determines the level of class and the type of etiquette at these events.

Personally, I very much enjoy putting several rows of polished medals on a mess dress uniform, and providing my wife the opportunity to look and feel like royalty. I enjoy honoring the occasion, shaking hands with dignitaries, and having thought provoking discussion with brilliant people (from within our own military, as well as State Department, and foreign nations as well). Most wealthy and educated professionals and dignitaries seem to share this concept, and enjoy both the comradery and occasion just fine.

There also seems to be a number of people who just want to do shots and wear their uniform in some strange drunken fashion while the DJ drops the bass. Most service members are under the age of 30, so their only experience with a “ball” was likely their high school prom, which is all they can typically compare their expectations to.

We don’t teach or glorify events like these in our society. At least not for the average American. When they are portrayed in movies and on TV, usually they are done so in a boring and un-fun way.

Personally, I think we should have TWO types of events during the year: ONE that we hold with both class and distinction, that honors both the guests in attendance as well as those throughout our rich history; And ONE that is less formal, and lets the average Soldier/Sailor let their hair down and have a more relaxed and fun time.

You will NEVER get MOST service members to attend and enjoy the type of functions that you are alluding to, as those events appeal to a different demographic or cross-section of service personnel. Not to say they are boring in the least, but most people would rather chug a beer and eat a pizza at a party than enjoy a 9-course gala dinner with classical music and meaningful conversation.

Response by TSgt Scott Hurley made Jan 21 at 2014 5:02 PM

2014-01-21T17:02:48-05:00

Never have been to a military ball or banquet. I have been to a maintenance Awards banquet. And we were forced to go even if we did not want to go. Let me tell you. It was boring.

Now as for you question. Yes, there should be military bearing at these types of functions. The dancing should be like it was in before dropping it like it was hot. Dancing should be dancing. Not who can shake their booty the fastest....

Now do not take this the wrong way LT. But from what I understand, in the Officer Cadre, since your an Officer, your also a Gentleman. So with that said. A lot of stuff that Officers of the PAST past down has not changed much. I bet you see it in the O Club. What type of music is played, how things are so Officer like. In other words. The good old boys club. The NCO Club on the other hand was a little rowdy.

Going back to the ball and banquet, it is supposed to be the same way. If those in uniform want to drop it like its hot, then take the uniform off and go down town for that. It has no place in the ball or baquet and certainly no place in the O or NCO Club.

Response by PV2 Chris Alzner made Aug 20 at 2016 7:07 PM

2016-08-20T19:07:22-04:00

The first ball to be done was well before the ARMY was created. We where known as rebels and the balls where held so that the high officers (normally people of high society) could maintain an image. however later in history they where a way for the subordinates to experience the high life for a night with the officers to encourage trust and educate. Later it transitioned into a closed private party for soldiers and their family typically held so soldiers could "let go" before deployment. now it is used as a way to celebrate various holidays and historical moments. As for the dancing styles remember that dancing has unfortunately changed over the years. best way to handle this would be to communicate with command and place reasonable "expected Educate" for the ball to be issued to all so that everyone is aware of the expected educate. try to bare in mind that what is unacceptable to you and me are normal for those born after 1990 and still more so for those born after 2000. needless to say they may not think it a bad thing while those like you and me may see it as unprofessional. communication is always key to handling problems of this nature. Also as a closing thought keep in mind that the more you make it dull for the enlisted the less likely they are to "want" to attend causing yet more issues.

Response by MAJ Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 21 at 2016 4:57 AM

2016-08-21T04:57:39-04:00

Short, infrequent and inexpensive...

Response by CPT Larry Hudson made May 3 at 2020 11:03 AM

2020-05-03T11:03:58-04:00

Its very formal, highest standards of military protocol, host receives each in attendance, toast are given to commerate the occasion.