What should I do about toxic leadership?

1LT Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 14 Sep 2021 21:53:55 -0400

Within my unit, I have a Sgt who does not treat me the best. Now in my mind, I didn’t think it was hazing. However, another NCO came up and apologized to me for how he was treating me. As well as several people in my platoon think that he has it out for me. I came in as an E-4 because of my degree and I believed that was why. I get teased because of my religious beliefs, personal values, etc. but I just thought that it was just an infantry thing. We all tease each other, it builds bonds. However again, people in my own platoon are telling me that I am “getting shit on.” I am not really sure what to do. I am new to my unit so I expected some of this and didn’t really worry about it at all. I’m also a college SPC so I didn’t think much of it either. If I’m being told that this is pretty bad, should I do something about it? I’m conflicted and seeking advice.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 14 at 2021 10:04 PM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 14 Sep 2021 22:04:49 -0400

I think before anyone can offer good advice on this we need some more specific details. A lot of hazing is hazing, some of it just teasing, and some of it is just..I hate to say it…whining. I’m not defaulting to you whining about anything but we need to know exactly what it happening.

If another NCO is apologizing to you that’s…troubling, sure. I’d also have to wonder if or why not that NCO has done some peer to peer counseling or run it up the chain.

Making fun of your religious beliefs is a direct violation of the Army EO policy but it’s up to you if that fight is worth it.

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 14 at 2021 10:05 PM

SGT Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 14 Sep 2021 22:05:55 -0400

1LT Private RallyPoint Member Trust what your religious belief would tell you... you can't go wrong there. When he goes lower... you go higher.IMO...

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 14 at 2021 10:18 PM

SFC Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 14 Sep 2021 22:18:29 -0400

If other people are coming up to you, including another NCO, that seems like something is up.

It ultimately depends on how much of it bothers you. Those other people could report any EO violations (the mocking religion or treating differently due to religion) even if you don't.

I mean if I saw another NCO treating a soldier like crap and it was actual harassment, hazing, EO violations- I'd take them aside and set them straight. That's me.

If it doesn't bother you, that's on you what you want to do I suppose based on what you have posted.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 14 at 2021 10:36 PM

SSG Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 14 Sep 2021 22:36:27 -0400

In my opinion I think you should pull your team leader to the side and have a respectful open conversation about how you feel about what is happening. Either he will shun you and shut that door or explain to you. Open conversations with your first line leader are important especially in and infantry squad let alone team. Cohesiveness is important in this career field. If it then persist you bring to your SL if he can’t handle it go one step further until you have exhausted all your resources with in the company, which I don’t think it would get passed your SL. Truth is you can’t clear the air if you don’t have the conversation and don’t be ashamed because you went to school first that makes you signing up no less than the next person we all wear the same uniform. I hope this provides you some insight and I wish you the best of luck

Response by SFC James Cameron made Sep 14 at 2021 10:52 PM

SFC James Cameron — Tue, 14 Sep 2021 22:52:15 -0400

I can’t speak for other occupations, but I know that 11 and 19 Series are going to talk trash on each other’s perceived weaknesses. We’ll talk trash on the other Squads, Platoons, Companies, etc. However, if you’re receiving demeaning, personal attacks in regards to your religious convictions, that’s something that needs to be addressed. Either tactfully directly or with your next higher level of leadership. It may be just that NCO’s personality, but if other NCO’s are approaching you about it then it’s evident from their perspective that things are not as they should be.

Response by SSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 14 at 2021 11:01 PM

SSgt Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 14 Sep 2021 23:01:28 -0400

You came in as a E4 to be an 11B, all this getting shit on is purely warrented. Your payment is due for the Years of being skipped out on. Ripe for the pickings as they say.

Response by TSgt Patrick Pounds made Sep 15 at 2021 5:07 AM

TSgt Patrick Pounds — Wed, 15 Sep 2021 05:07:13 -0400

Your initial comment, you have an nco that "doesn't treat you the best". You said you came in as an E-4, skipping 3 grades because of your degree. That sounds like resentment of not starting out as an E-1 like everyone else.In your case, you are going to have to "earn" the type of respect that goes with that E-4 grade. Right now your best bet is to listen and learn from the other NCOs and do not be afraid to ask questions. If it was me in your situation, I would approach the NCO that's riding you like a dirty sex poodle and ask for advice. It takes swallowing your pride but remember why you are there, Big Picture. To lead soldiers into battle. That's your eye on the prize. That's why you are there. You arent there to make friends, you are not there to worry about what other people gossip like little girls about you, you are not the to win a popularity contest. You are there to train, equip, build cohesion,

Response by SFC Randy Hellenbrand made Sep 15 at 2021 8:51 AM

SFC Randy Hellenbrand — Wed, 15 Sep 2021 08:51:30 -0400

God won't help you. The easiest is ask the CO to transfer you to a different platoon. Why?? The other NCO knew but didn't do anything about the problem.

Response by SSgt Christophe Murphy made Sep 15 at 2021 10:40 AM

SSgt Christophe Murphy — Wed, 15 Sep 2021 10:40:54 -0400

You and this NCO who witnessed the supposed harassment need to bring it up the line. Team Leader, Squad Leader, Platoon Sgt etc.
If you are being treated poorly in regards to your relegion outside of normal ball busting go to EO or your Plt Sgt.

Response by SPC Erich Guenther made Sep 15 at 2021 11:58 AM

SPC Erich Guenther — Wed, 15 Sep 2021 11:58:09 -0400

It should not matter to you if your a college SPC or not. Should not matter to a professional NCO either. The Army considers the college degree as an asset and that is why they give you advanced rank. Folks without college degrees are encouraged to get them via tuition reimbursement from the Army as well as points towards their next promotion. So there is also equality there in that your not being treated anymore favorably than the other guy who also has the opportunity to achieve parity in education with you if they like with all expenses paid for by the Army. Just wanted to mention that part and you should get that out of your head. You have the rank because the Army says you earned it via civilian accomplishment. Much like some Officers are Direct Commission to CPT and above.

Response by SGT(P) Private RallyPoint Member made Sep 15 at 2021 10:20 PM

SGT(P) Private RallyPoint Member — Wed, 15 Sep 2021 22:20:51 -0400

Whenever you talk to him, remember to always remain tactful and professional. Don't give him any ammo to fire at you and DO NOT let your emotions trump or supercede rational thinking. People like that will take advantage of it at every opportunity. I agree with everyone else about asking to speak to him in private, preferably with a battle buddy or another NCO as a third party/moderator. Doing so not only demonstrates your maturity and professionalism but also your ability and desire to face problems headon in the hopes that a reasonable conclusion will be the result. Just don't come at him as a victim. If he's anything like some of the NCOs I had early on, then he won't see it coming. Typically if you allow them to walk on you they will be caught off guard when you decide one day that you're not going to be their doormat. At the end of the day, it's a near impossible feat to change toxic people. Especially when they don't see themselves as such. Let him show his true colors and when he leaves the unit, everyone will see the negative effects he had on people. Which will hopefully teach everyone what to look out for in the future and hopefully squash it as soon as it's recognized.
Good luck brother.

Response by SGT Trip Heaverly made Sep 16 at 2021 3:46 PM

SGT Trip Heaverly — Thu, 16 Sep 2021 15:46:22 -0400

Be a high performer. Your Platoon Sergeant chooses who goes to the board, not your TL or SL. Get promoted, and let your leadership know you’re cool with getting moved to a different squad/platoon. But it’s on you, bad leadership is everywhere and it’s our job to adapt and overcome. Good luck!

Response by 2LT Earl Dean made Sep 17 at 2021 5:17 PM

2LT Earl Dean — Fri, 17 Sep 2021 17:17:34 -0400

turn his ass in to the commander these days no one should be degraided for education

Response by SPC Dasan Toney made Sep 25 at 2021 3:27 PM

SPC Dasan Toney — Sat, 25 Sep 2021 15:27:43 -0400

I think this is a good learning lesson here that even when the Units say that EO doesn't exist that you should do your best to push it. The biggest reason is to uphold LDRSHIP. If you do not know where to find this regulation it is in the Army Command Policy AR 600-20. Chapter 2 paras 4-19 will help you if this is a EO problem. It is up to you on if you want to push it up or not.