Why are you afraid of failure?

MSG Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 04 May 2015 23:41:27 -0400

WHY ARE YOU AFRAID TO TRY.? I have read many advice articles where people tell others to be gray. don't try to shine. stay in the middle of the pack. don't bring unneeded attention your way.

I say try. I say fail. I say get back up and fight some more. why not challenge yourself. why not find out where you are short and work to get better. why do we constantly tell people to not get noticed.
sure, failure sucks. but I personally prefer someone who has failed than one who has never tried. I have been recently a little disgusted. ive heard people tell others not to try because they would fail, or that they just aren't good enough, or that going out for something like best warrior is like being a teacher's pet. when I went out for NCO of the year, there were about 20 competitors in the battalion. more than ten in the company.

what about you. can you tell me how you feel about failure. what advice you truly give to people trying to stand out. those trying to go to a school or training. at what point do you tell someone to dive in. take a risk. in the end, failure only makes you better.

hell, I failed Jumpmaster School. I had never failed at anything!! it grounded me. made me want it so much more. made me have to prove myself.
I really want to hear you motivate those that are on the edge of trying out for something!!!

Response by CW4 Private RallyPoint Member made May 4 at 2015 11:47 PM

CW4 Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 04 May 2015 23:47:08 -0400

I am not afraid to fail but when I take big projects on I am usually very meticulous and thorough. I always try to ask what am I missing, what am I not thinking about, view the problem from others perspectives, ect.

Response by LTC Private RallyPoint Member made May 4 at 2015 11:56 PM

LTC Private RallyPoint Member — Mon, 04 May 2015 23:56:22 -0400

You should want to stand out as who you are. If you don't then what are you doing? Be willing to stand up for what you believe.

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made May 5 at 2015 12:05 AM

CPT Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 05 May 2015 00:05:48 -0400

MSG Private RallyPoint Member Thanks so much for this awesome post, Master Sergeant! Like you said, failure might be difficult to swallow initially, but it makes you much stronger in the long run. It engenders even greater drive, determination, and hunger to succeed. It forces you out of your comfort zone and adjusts your frame of reference. It also makes you a lot mentally tougher, because if you can come back from getting your heart ripped out, you can turn any obstacle to your benefit.

"Failure is what happens when you decide you failed. Until then, you're still always looking for ways to get where you want to be." -Tim Grover, MJ 's strength & conditioning coach

Response by COL Charles Williams made May 5 at 2015 1:00 AM

COL Charles Williams — Tue, 05 May 2015 01:00:51 -0400

You can't succeed if you are afraid to fail. Winners take failure as incentive to work harder and achieve their goals. Losers see failure as a reason to stop. It is better to try and fail than never to try at all.

"It's not the critic who counts; Not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit goes to the one who is actually in the arena; Who strives valiantly; who errs and comes up short again and again; Who knows the great devotions, the great enthusiasms, and spends himself in a worthy cause. Who, at the best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement; and, at the worst, if he fails at least he fails while daring greatly; so that his place will never be among those timid and cold souls who know neither victory or defeat."

Theodore Roosevelt.

Response by LTC Stephen C. made May 5 at 2015 1:02 AM

LTC Stephen C. — Tue, 05 May 2015 01:02:00 -0400

MSG Private RallyPoint Member, failure in and of itself has no value, unless something is learned from it.

I heard this best expressed in the 2006 movie, "A Good Year". Uncle Henry Skinner beats young Max Skinner in tennis, who is furious. Uncle Henry counsels Max thusly, "You'll come to see that a man learns nothing from winning. The act of losing, however, can elicit great wisdom. Not least of which is, uh... how much more enjoyable it is to win. It's inevitable to lose now and again. The trick is not to make a habit of it."

Response by SFC Stephen King made May 5 at 2015 4:50 AM

SFC Stephen King — Tue, 05 May 2015 04:50:09 -0400

Failure is only failure if you fail to learn from it.

"You build on failure. You use it as a stepping stone. Close the door on the past. You don't try to forget the mistakes, but you don't dwell on it. You don't let it have any of your energy, or any of your time, or any of your space." Johnny Cash

If set unachievable goals and are consistently not reaching them lower you goal and let a small setback or failure lead you to succeed. I have tried to instill this thought process in my son and Soldiers alike. This also means hard work is a necessary aspect in life to overcome failure and gain personal growth.

My son had a hard time with tests and it took him a while to learn but it was the growth and failure which allowed him to achieve his goal on the ACT and he is going to college.

Response by SFC Stephen King made May 5 at 2015 5:02 AM

SFC Stephen King — Tue, 05 May 2015 05:02:06 -0400

Arnold’s 6 Rules to Success:

1. Trust yourself

Many young people are getting so much advice from their parents and from their teachers and from everyone. But what is most important is that you have to dig deep down, dig deep down and ask yourselves, who do you want to be? Not what, but who. Figure out for yourselves what makes you happy, no matter how crazy it may sound to other people.

2. Break the Rules

Break the rules, not the law, but break the rules. It is impossible to be a maverick or a true original if you’re too well behaved and don’t want to break the rules. You have to think outside the box. That’s what I believe. After all, what is the point of being on this earth if all you want to do is be liked by everyone and avoid trouble?

3. Don’t Be Afraid to Fail

Anything I’ve ever attempted, I was always willing to fail. So you can’t always win, but don’t afraid of making decisions. You can’t be paralyzed by fear of failure or you will never push yourself. You keep pushing because you believe in yourself and in your vision and you know that it is the right thing to do, and success will come. So don’t be afraid to fail.

4. Don’t Listen to the Naysayers

How many times have you heard that you can’t do this and you can’t do that and it’s never been done before? I love it when someone says that no one has ever done this before, because then when I do it that means that I’m the first one that has done it. So pay no attention to the people that say it can’t be done. I never listen to, “You can’t.” (Applause) I always listen to myself and say, “Yes, you can.”

5. Work Your Butt Off

You never want to fail because you didn’t work hard enough. Mohammed Ali, one of my great heroes, had a great line in the ’70s when he was asked, “How many sit-ups do you do?” He said, “I don’t count my sit-ups. I only start counting when it starts hurting. When I feel pain, that’s when I start counting, because that’s when it really counts.” That’s what makes you a champion. No pain, no gain.
But when you’re out there partying, horsing around, someone out there at the same time is working hard. Someone is getting smarter and someone is winning. Just remember that. Now, if you want to coast through life, don’t pay attention to any of those rules. But if you want to win, there is absolutely no way around hard, hard work. Just remember, you can’t climb the ladder of success with your hands in your pockets.

6. Give Back

Whatever path that you take in your lives, you must always find time to give something back, something back to your community, give something back to your state or to your country.

Remember these 6 rules. Trust yourself, break some rules, don’t be afraid to fail, ingore the naysayers, work like hell, and give something back.

Arnold Schwarzenegger

Response by CSM Private RallyPoint Member made May 5 at 2015 5:56 AM

CSM Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 05 May 2015 05:56:09 -0400

Response by CPT Bob Moore made May 5 at 2015 8:04 AM

CPT Bob Moore — Tue, 05 May 2015 08:04:35 -0400

This is something I "preach" with my staff. I tell them that they can't break anything that I can't fix, either with a more senior technician or with a purchase. The only thing they can't take risks with is people's data.

People learn by trying, and sometimes by failing. I want people to be comfortable enough to take risks and do great things. If they are always afraid of the repercussions of failure, they won't be able to do that.

After they try and fail, though, a leader must follow through on the promise to help out. I try to always use a failure as a teaching moment rather than a discipline event.

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made May 5 at 2015 12:32 PM

SGT Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 05 May 2015 12:32:14 -0400

I fear disappointing myself or my superiors who have go to bat for me and back me up when an opportunity presents itself. there is little i want to avoid more than coming back empty handed.

Response by 1SG Robert C. made May 5 at 2015 6:52 PM

1SG Robert C. — Tue, 05 May 2015 18:52:38 -0400

You only fail if you don't try or don't get back up again. Setbacks teaches you what not to do next time. Do you think Waren Buffet or Donald Trump never failed. They did fail many times but they got tried again learning from temporary setback. May advice go out an tackle setbacks so you can reach your goals! Without tackling those setback you will never reach your goals.

Response by PO2 Kevin LaCroix made May 5 at 2015 7:03 PM

PO2 Kevin LaCroix — Tue, 05 May 2015 19:03:57 -0400

I am not afraid of failure, I prefer not to use the term failure as i concerns people. I actually am more afraid of success because once you succeed, success is always expected.

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made May 5 at 2015 9:37 PM

SGT Private RallyPoint Member — Tue, 05 May 2015 21:37:22 -0400

MSG Ibarra, I'm glad you raised this question. I myself have doubted my abilities to compete in something before for the exact fear of failing. To me, personally, I don't like to disappoint myself. I don't want to just give it the ol college try when deep down I know I'm not ready then fail. However, I've reached a point where I see things differently. I want to get as much as I can from the army while I can. I want to do things I was afraid of just to challenge myself so I don't become complacent. It also helps when you've got great leaders who do push you and encourage you and lend that helping hand. "If at first you don't succeed. Try, try again."

Response by SFC Stephen King made Aug 28 at 2017 2:50 PM

SFC Stephen King — Mon, 28 Aug 2017 14:50:30 -0400

"I can accept failure, everyone fails at something. But I can't accept not trying." Michael Jordan

Response by SSG Trevor S. made Aug 28 at 2017 4:10 PM

SSG Trevor S. — Mon, 28 Aug 2017 16:10:41 -0400

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hSLV3AjLiZk

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