Posted on Oct 22, 2014
Why do spouses insist on wearing uniform items that they didn't earn? Better yet, why are the military members letting them?
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If I see another spouse half naked in either military blouse or draped in flag, I might loose it. And then claim 'I serve to'. NO. YOU DON'T. 'Toughest job in ___(insert branch here)' I'm a military spouse and I am a Marine, and once I'm off contract, I will not be saying that we serve together while he's gone. I run the home. So do you. Period. Self-entitled lazy .......
Spouses
Uniforms
Posted >1 y ago
Responses: 144
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SrA Lynn Lent
I had a dependent get on me when I was working the gate at Fairchild after just getting back from a deployment for not saluting his son because his wife was an officer. I explained to him that I wasn't required to salute since the spouse was not in the vehicle. I ended saluting any ways for the kid. It's sad how entitled some spouse's feel.
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SMSgt (Join to see)
Should have called your Flight Chief out and got the officers contact info. I would have gave the name to the Commander to give to the Group Commander at the weekly Staff Meeting. I guarantee that would have been the last complaint that you would have gotten from any officer needing to have their spouse or family members saluted.
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PO3 Stephanie Matlock
Well I am a Navy Disabled Veteran and my boyfriend is a Marine Disabled Veteran and for V-Day I do plan on wearing his Marine jacket and Cover for a photo shoot and dog tags and nothing else. Of course the pictures are for him so I thought it would be a great idea! That is my personal preference. I do believe the "spouses" serve along side their service men/women but are not "entitled" to feel that they should be treated as a service memeber
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Sgt Sasha Cruz It looks like you were more interested in excoriating these spouses for their behavior than in finding out why they act the way they do. Your original question really hasn't gotten much attention on this discussion, so I'll take a shot at it. First, a disclaimer, my wife doesn't wear Marine Corps gear (with the rare exception of the fleece when we're camping-or a sweatshirt at home), nor does she have any of those silly bumper-stickers or moto shirts etc. and those things irritate us also.
That being said: the reason these significant others likely behave the way they do is out of a sense of vulnerability and a lack of confidence. They feel like their relationship is in danger (statistically it often is-usually due to choices of one partner or another-but sometimes just due to the possibility of traumatic loss) and seek the social payoff of attention, sympathy, and respect to compensate them for it.
The same regime exists for those of us actually in the military. We have very hard lives, we risk much, and we have intangible rewards of respect and adulation heaped on us by the public at large to recompense us for it above and beyond our monetary pay. While their risk, and their sacrifice may or may not equal ours, surely it is greater than that of a spouse married to someone in most any other industry.
I would argue that "boot spouses" act a lot like "boot Marines." They bluster and brag, they wear their statuses on their sleeves (not just in uniform) they seek the public admiration and adulation, and they do it gratingly. More senior and experienced spouses, just like more senior and experienced Marines and leaders have grown into their life and their leadership roles. They have learned how to console grieving widows, and how to advise friends dealing with infidelity (one way or another). They've learned how the deployment cycle, loss, longing, and re-integration go. And as they learn they become publicly quieter, calmer, stronger.
Not all Marines are strong, quiet professionals, but we surely hope as they develop they become such. The same applies to spouses.
You are in a unique position, having experienced both sides of this coin to compare and contrast, if you choose to do so thoughtfully. I challenge you especially (but also Sgt (Join to see) and all Marine NCO's) to approach it that way, and to leave the mockery and bitterness to those with less experience and leadership potential. A very good book that talks on the topic of the strength required by a military spouse is Gates of Fire by Steven Pressfield (https://www.rallypoint.com/answers/what-is-the-best-professional-military-fiction)
We all like to have a little laugh at those less experienced than us when they act silly (http://terminallance.com/2010/02/26/terminal-lance-16-lol-boots/). But then it is our duty to develop and mentor them.
That being said: the reason these significant others likely behave the way they do is out of a sense of vulnerability and a lack of confidence. They feel like their relationship is in danger (statistically it often is-usually due to choices of one partner or another-but sometimes just due to the possibility of traumatic loss) and seek the social payoff of attention, sympathy, and respect to compensate them for it.
The same regime exists for those of us actually in the military. We have very hard lives, we risk much, and we have intangible rewards of respect and adulation heaped on us by the public at large to recompense us for it above and beyond our monetary pay. While their risk, and their sacrifice may or may not equal ours, surely it is greater than that of a spouse married to someone in most any other industry.
I would argue that "boot spouses" act a lot like "boot Marines." They bluster and brag, they wear their statuses on their sleeves (not just in uniform) they seek the public admiration and adulation, and they do it gratingly. More senior and experienced spouses, just like more senior and experienced Marines and leaders have grown into their life and their leadership roles. They have learned how to console grieving widows, and how to advise friends dealing with infidelity (one way or another). They've learned how the deployment cycle, loss, longing, and re-integration go. And as they learn they become publicly quieter, calmer, stronger.
Not all Marines are strong, quiet professionals, but we surely hope as they develop they become such. The same applies to spouses.
You are in a unique position, having experienced both sides of this coin to compare and contrast, if you choose to do so thoughtfully. I challenge you especially (but also Sgt (Join to see) and all Marine NCO's) to approach it that way, and to leave the mockery and bitterness to those with less experience and leadership potential. A very good book that talks on the topic of the strength required by a military spouse is Gates of Fire by Steven Pressfield (https://www.rallypoint.com/answers/what-is-the-best-professional-military-fiction)
We all like to have a little laugh at those less experienced than us when they act silly (http://terminallance.com/2010/02/26/terminal-lance-16-lol-boots/). But then it is our duty to develop and mentor them.
What is the best professional military fiction? | RallyPoint
Of the options offered? Warning: mentioning the movies without having read the books is a down-votable offense. Offering an alternative professional military fiction is acceptable, but six answers to a survey is not supportable.
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Sgt Joseph Brett
The reason they typically take pics is to look sexy for their husband and also it's only after they separate that these pics hit the Internet. If they are wearing it out in town then snatch her up. As far as spouses using the military members rank.. That's happened to me when I was a boot. I was walking and she actually stopped to ask me why I didn't salute her. I said oh didn't know you were an officer. She said well my husband is a capt. So now you know for next time. and even then I looked at her and laughed and told her to have her husband njp me
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SFC Jim Ruether
Sgt Joseph Brett - Good for you. In that case that Capt. should be counseled. It's always correct to extend a greeting of the day to a military spouse but saluting one is way out of line.
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How else are privates going to get any?
It's like having your girlfriend wear your dog tags (flopping out for all to see) when you are dating.
It's all hilarious to me.
It's like having your girlfriend wear your dog tags (flopping out for all to see) when you are dating.
It's all hilarious to me.
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PO3 Stephanie Matlock
Well back when I was in (1990's) the guys I knew while in the Navy would do the same stupid crap and you are NOT supposed to give your dog tags to someone!
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SGT Jonathan-Nicole Harrison
It's hard work for ANY wife with kids and house work....providing that they are doing that and not hoin' around at the local pub.
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