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Responses: 12
LTC Orlando Illi
10
10
0
I was brand new Company Commander in 1982. The 1SG came in to my office to discuss the Overweight program and the number of men still unable to meet their weight goal. One of them was an E-7 that was shaped like a pear and had an attitude problem. He had 18 years in and thought that I, as a new Company Commander, would not be impertinent enough to require him to meet his weight and PT goals. He felt that he should just be allowed to skate toward his 20 year retirement. He was @ 20 pounds overweight and could not pass his PT test due to various medical issues (both documented and imagined). I initiated PT at 05:30 in the morning for all the men on the overweight/remedial PT program and led it myself. After @ 1 month this SFC complained to the 1SG that I was running to fast at PT (I kept a 8:30 pace per mile) and that I was stopping him from eating breakfast. (The dining facility opened at 06:00). I called him into the office to discuss his complaints he said that he was overweight due to a genetic disorder. I looked over at the 1SG, who was sitting behind the SFC on a chair in my office with a cup of coffee, and the 1SG gave me a WTF is this look. I asked the SFC to clarify his point and he said " ... Sir, the reason I am overweight is generic because my wife is fat ..." Now, please put yourself in my position as I tried valiantly not to laugh after the 1SG spit his coffee out and almost blew a blood vessel laughing so hard. I told him, without missing a beat, "... well Sarge I can't be responsible for your spouse but I will see you tomorrow at 05:30 for PT..."
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LTC Orlando Illi
LTC Orlando Illi
7 y
PO3 Steven Sherrill - I wish I could have called BS. However, Military Decorum and Protocol prescribed that I remain somewhat stoic. However, that evening the Brigade CSM called me and asked if could come to his office. When I got their he had all the Battalion CSM there and I was asked to relate the story. I never saw Senior NCO's laugh so hard. Concurently, the Brigade Commander was leaving for the day and when he heard all the laughter he came in. I told him the story and he laughed and laughed. It was one of the funniest moments I can recall as a Company Commander
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CSM Charles Hayden
CSM Charles Hayden
7 y
Thank Heaven for that levity repaying some of the rigors of being a company commander!
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LTC Orlando Illi
LTC Orlando Illi
7 y
CSM Charles Hayden - best job in the Army CSM Harden. 19 months and each day was different. I still have my you appointment books and my COC Announcements.
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CSM Charles Hayden
CSM Charles Hayden
7 y
And, you and/or the 1SG could make things happen, NOW! LTC Orlando Illi
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CPT Jack Durish
8
8
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We know this is a joke, right? If we needed spouses, the military would issue us one and the unattractive ones would go to the Navy. (After several months at sea even the unattractive ones look good)
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PO3 Steven Sherrill
PO3 Steven Sherrill
7 y
CPT Jack Durish Only explanation for mistaking a dugong for a mermaid?
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SSG Michael Tellekamp
SSG Michael Tellekamp
7 y
LOL. My Mom was a Marine's wife so watch it Jack!
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LTC Owner
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SSG Edward Tilton
4
4
0
Acd7912e
Army issued me one 52 years ago, still works
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SFC William H.
SFC William H.
7 y
SSG Tilton: How do you get them to work?
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