Posted on Jan 28, 2015
SSgt Dan Montague
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Long ago, you had to reach a certain rank to get married and ask permission from your command. So the idea is not new. Just thinking how much money is spent on dependents these days. Whether it is medical or base housing. We have all seen a victim of a dependa. A young service member who gets talked into marriage at 19 and the dependa soaks up all the benefits. Sometimes this situation brings on much stress and many issues for the young service member. We all know that is a strain on unit readiness as well. So if the service member can not marry until a certain rank or time served, there would be a huge savings overall and less issues with the younger service members.....Opinions?????
Edited >1 y ago
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Responses: 141
SPC Ryan Tamas
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Why do people in the military insist on treating people by their rank rather than their age or maturity? It's one thing when it comes to authority and discipline and a complete other thing when it comes to maturity and intelligence. It was one of the most annoying things I had to deal with when I was in. You should be given respect for your rank and your discipline because that's the standard, but you shouldn't be denied respect or decency just because you're not a E5 or 03. As long as there's a point system for promotion-another terrible aspect of the army-suggesting that you should have to reach a certain rank to get married is ludicrous. A 21 year-old E5 who has never deployed with 3 1/2 years in who only has to get 170 points for sergeant should have "marriage privileges" over a 24 year-old E4 with two deployments and 600 points for sergeant? Shit like that is why good soldiers get out after their first enlistment.
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SPC Retrans Operator
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7 y
Spoken like a true CPL. I was a CPL for a year before I got promoted and was frequently asked why I wasn't promoted yet. Every one thinks that because you have a certain rank you are a certain level of mature and its not even close to true.
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PO2 Stephen Cline
PO2 Stephen Cline
7 y
I was 19 when I made E-5. So which do you object to more an E-4 getting married or a 19 year old E-5?
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PO1 Richard Cormier
PO1 Richard Cormier
>1 y
I was a 17 year old E3 when I married in 1977. Got permission with a "Special Request Chit". Still married to that wonderful woman. Life has definitely had its bumps and bruises.
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SGT Undergraduate Student
SGT (Join to see)
5 y
SCPO Morris Ramsey - So instead of just saying anyone should be allowed to marry the solution is to force people into officer roles that they may or may not want or block them all together? That is not a very smart way to handle this. Our recruiting numbers are already down pretty far not letting married in would drop it more. And think about this a person who actually wanted to be an officer will put everything they have into being an amazing officer but a person who was forced will build resentment and either not reenlist or will not give a shit.
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SSG Healthcare Specialist (Combat Medic)
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Long ago you got promoted based off of ability to lead and not a college degree, if we enforce this how about we fix the promotions first
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SGT Kaye Fiorello
SGT Kaye Fiorello
>1 y
or the old SQT - you had to pass the SQT for that MOS to get on the promotion list, not just be a garrison soldier
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PFC Horizontal Construction Engineer
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7 y
That is what the comment states, SGT. I can tell you in the civilian world, experience trumps education. If common sense saves lives, why not place those with common sense in leadership positions?
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CW3 Doyle Frost
CW3 Doyle Frost
7 y
PFC (Join to see) - Sorry there PFC, but that is not the case. Nowadays, more and more employers are looking for that sheepskin, even over experience. One of the reasons this country is getting to be in such terrible straits. As far as common sense, as an old soldier, much prefer that to a piece of paper when it comes to leadership talent.
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SSG Healthcare Specialist (Combat Medic)
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7 y
PFC (Join to see) - Commons sense and real leadership ability are different. While you have to have common sense to be able to lead not all those with common sense can lead. War does not make sense. And poor leadership gets people killed.
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SGT Bryon Sergent
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Why not stop spending Billions of dollars on useless aircraft that never gets to the military, or research on super high tech toys that never gets to the military. Yes, the dependa, that tricks young soldiers into marriage and suck off the military are there, but what about the welfare suckers that go out and rob someone, or steal from someones house. How bout they get actually jobs! Be productive. If the dependa wasn't on the military benefits then they still would be on the government benefits! Whats the difference. Before you give me the down vote, I was on government help when I first got married out of the service. I went out found a JOB, and got off the help. It was designed to be help, not a lifestyle. If we hadn't speny trillions of dollars on the Comanche, where would the budget be now? If we hadn't spent trillions on the F-35 (that still isn't in service), where would the budget be.? Just saying.
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SGM Joel Cook
SGM Joel Cook
7 y
PO3 Kevin Luby - very funny, as I am sure you are well aware those high ranking bone heads are few and far between. I knew a WO2 that went home on mid tour leave from Iraq, when he got back he had an additional wife. Yeh, he already had one but his mistress was hounding him to get married. He got caught because his new wife wrote the Commander asking why her BAH and other benefits hadn't been started yet. When I got married in Korea, in 1984, I had to go through that whole red tape package of asking my Commanders and EUSA for permission to marry. It was mostly designed to take so long, be so difficult, and be so repetitive that your tour of duty would be over before you could get married. Once per month I had be counseled by a Chaplin and then my Company Commander. They each had a questionnaire they read questions from per Batum each month with no variations allowed. They said because the divorce rate between Koreans and US service members was why they made it so hard. We are still married 35 years later.
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SGT Bryon Sergent
SGT Bryon Sergent
7 y
SSgt (Join to see) - with all due respect SSG, I knew it was an exaggeration! The point is we spend a shit ton of money on useless crap!
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SGT Bryon Sergent
SGT Bryon Sergent
7 y
PO1 Pete Sikes - nough said! Where would the 7 Billion had gone if not wasted there!
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SSgt Boyd Herrst
SSgt Boyd Herrst
>1 y
Spot on Gunny Gravila !
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