General Interactions: What is your funniest interactions with Generals?

2014-10-14T23:23:20-04:00

What is the funniest story you have when interacting with General Officers?

Mine was at a conference I charged with the task to "round up" the Generals and Admirals and put them in a certain order. Well all, with the exception of one, were the head of their service's reserve component with an additional 2 star from the Marine Reserves. So yeah.....I read the names off one by one going through admirals and totally butchering their last names...until I got to the Army Reserves Commanding General. I pronounced it....FLAWLESSLY....and of course the Admirals teased the General that of course I, an Army Reservist, pronounced his name right. I proceeded to read the list and butcher a few other names but pronounced others correctly. It is one thing to be teased by your peers but being teased by the head of organizations...well that was "special".

Response by SCPO Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 14 at 2014 11:48 PM

2014-10-14T23:48:05-04:00

As an E-3 in the Air Force I was working on special projects for our Wing Commander (BG). We were setting up a reception at his residence for local media and politicians. I was going into the house (at an accelerated pace) plowed threw the door into the house which open inside and knocked General Walker on his ass!!! I was mortified and speechless... General Walker was like, "it was my fault Airman I wasn't paying attention". Regardless, I never lived it down. He was a great CO.

Response by PO3 Shaun Taylor made Oct 15 at 2014 12:47 AM

2014-10-15T00:47:35-04:00

Mine was at the clinic giving immunizations. I had to give the general a shot (GG) but he wasn't too fond of needles. He kept squirming around and was making me nervous. Without thinking I told him sir keep your butt still. He did it, I gave the shot and then I got reprimanded by my HM1 for talking to the general like that. I was scared as hell after that because I didn't even realize that I had said that, but when the general came back for his annual and had to get his ppd he did request the "dark green" doc (me) to give it to him.

Response by SSG Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 15 at 2014 9:28 AM

2014-10-15T09:28:11-04:00

In Germany this summer I was photographing some Soldiers, American and international. Without hesitation, I photographed the 7th Army CG as if he were just another troop. Once I realized he had stars, I saluted him and all, then kept doing my work. One of the German officers called me paparazzi. The entire three months I was there, I was introduced as paparazzi by the CG and CSM to department heads and the like. During my time there, the 7th Army CG moved to be the Deputy CG of US Army Europe. He still called me paparazzi. It wasn't until the end that I learned they both actually knew my name :)

Response by TSgt Joshua Copeland made Oct 15 at 2014 10:36 AM

2014-10-15T10:36:12-04:00

Getting shot with a electronically controlled nerf cannon by a 2 Star.

http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/8a0f/

Maj Gen: Why is my Outlook slow when it opens?

SSgt Copeland: Sir, when it opens it has to load various modules, then sync..

Maj Gen: Stop right there... walk over to the wall and turn around and face me.

SSgt Copeland: Yes Sir.

While my back is turned he pulls out the cannon and when I turn around he proceeds to aim it and shoot me.

Maj Gen: I don't really care why it is slow, All I want to know is can you make it faster!

USB Rocket Launcher

This launcher has twice the range of the other foam dart launchers and 360 degree rotation. Strike anywhere, deep into enemy territory, and sit back knowing full well your enemies can't reach you.

Response by MAJ Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 15 at 2014 10:36 AM

2014-10-15T10:36:21-04:00

Our State Adjutant General was holding a "town hall" meeting to discuss recent events with the troops. As part of the meeting, he would periodically ask questions, and the prescribed method of feedback was to text in the code corresponding to your response.

When he got to the first of these, he stood in front of the screen, asked us to give our feedback, and in the silence that ensued, asked if anyone had any questions. I raised my hand, and hesitantly said "You're standing in front of the codes you want us to enter...sir." He looked surprised, turned around, and stepped to one side, laughing and replying "So what you're saying is I make a better door than window!".

It was a bit awkward, but I'm definitely glad he took it in good humor!

Response by SSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 15 at 2014 12:47 PM

2014-10-15T12:47:25-04:00

I was a USAF Security Forces Staff Sergeant assigned to manage a security team for a classified exercise at the Air Force Special Operations Command at Hurlburt Field in Ft. Walton Beach, Florida. The exercise was the first of a 5-year series of exercises and, as such, had a high visibility with the brass. The Brigadier General Director of Security Forces showed up at our “deployed location” at Duke Field just up the street, and I was asked to run him down and see if he could do a meet and greet with the troops.

Now, understand, Duke was supposed to be downrange. Even though it was an exercise, we were still processing classified information. Our security posture was real. We had security personnel all over the place, entry control points (ECPs), concertina wire. I caught up with the BG breaking through the wire with two O-6s to avoid having to go through our main ECP.

Man, if I had been armed. I would have earned my first Article 15 or my new Tech Sergeant stripes that night by jacking up a One Star and two Full Birds for circumventing my security and sneaking into my area.

I told a Captain about it the next day. “Well,” she said, “you would have only done it once.” Captain, to go down in career field history as a Security Forces god, I would have only had to do it once. They would still be talking about me in tech school.

Response by SFC Mark Merino made Oct 15 at 2014 3:21 PM

2014-10-15T15:21:57-04:00

General Cody (Mr Aviation, himself) presented me my PH and my youngest son was 7. As General Cody continued his speech, addressing the mostly Officer group, he turned over the discussion to the group and my tiny son took the reigns and started asking questions. General Cody was in awe of this little "leader" and allowed him to finish and said "You will make a fine Warrant Officer one day my little friend". General Cody presented him his Army Vice Chief of Staff coin and business card and told him to contact him if he ever needed anything..... "I'll remember you, little soldier." I asked him if he remembered chewing out a young crewchief on the flight line when he was the 101st Division Commander and he said "I wasn't going to bring that up, but I thought that was you." (11 years prior!) My son presented him my 4/6 ACS CAV belt buckle for doing our family this honor and he loved it, despite being an Apache lover. "I'm going to make this my new GO belt buckle!" Good times.

Response by SSG Ralph Innes made Oct 15 at 2014 3:41 PM

2014-10-15T15:41:48-04:00

While deployed to Bosnia, I was responsible for developing the daily intelligence book for the 1st ID Commander, General Meigs. I put the book together during the night shift and would sit down with him in the morning for him to review it. I received all the intel and decided what made the book for that day. On one occasion, he reviewed the book and said, "Isn't today Milosevic's wife's birthday?" I replied that it was. (It was part of the intel I didn't feel was important so it didn't make the book). He continued, "Don't you think that it is important for me to know these things? If I ran into Milosevic today and didn't know it was his wife's birthday, what would I say to him?" I replied, "You're under arrest."

Gen Meigs didn't find the humor in that, but I did.

Response by SSG John Erny made Oct 15 at 2014 6:10 PM

2014-10-15T18:10:50-04:00

CPT Brian Maurelli, Sir I came around the corner of a building at green ramp with a parachute that needed changed out and Nearly nocked General James Johnson (82nd Div Commander) on his ass. E-3 Me sorry sir, Him your just doing your job carry on.

General Roger P. Lempke pinned my E-5 on upside down, he came from the Air Guard

Response by CPT Mike M. made Oct 15 at 2014 7:37 PM

2014-10-15T19:37:46-04:00

While getting a briefing from the Dean at West Point, he showed a normal distribution bell curve of the grades of the class of 2006. He pointed to the left side and said something to the effect of "You guys over here, you need to pick it up a little bit but you're going to be ok." He then pointed to the far right side and said "And you guys up here - you...you guys need to get a life!" It was pretty awesome coming from the Dean of all people and as the future Goat of my class, I get an extra kick out of it thinking back.

Response by MAJ Robert (Bob) Petrarca made Oct 16 at 2014 7:07 AM

2014-10-16T07:07:25-04:00

Well let's see I've worked for so many of them:

1. Rousing the old man out of his tent when my boss tossed in a smoke grenade.
2. Putting the red car plate in the plate holder upside down then paying for it with pushups.
3. Referring to my boss as a clown at a staff meeting with him sitting there then correcting myself by calling him the senior clown.
4. Telling my boss it was his base (GTMO) but Castro's island.
5. Being briefed by the boss on TOC etiquette which included farting a.k.a. "dropping a$$".

Response by COL Jean (John) F. B. made Oct 16 at 2014 9:48 AM

2014-10-16T09:48:16-04:00

While attending the Infantry Officers Advanced Course at Ft Benning, Georgia, I was assigned to be the escort officer for a retired Army four-star and former Ft Benning CG, who was attending the 200th Anniversary of the Infantry celebration. I had been requested, by name, because he was a good friend of my dad.

I was promoted to Captain on the day he was scheduled to arrive. I picked up the driver and car and proceeded to the Columbus, Georgia airport to pick up the general and his wife.

As the general entered the terminal, I walked up to him, saluted, and stated "Sir, I am Lieutenant Burleson and I will be your escort officer". He took one look at the brand new Captain bars on my uniform and said, "Don't you even know what F**king rank you are Captain?"... I quickly stated, "I'm sorry sir, I just got promoted a couple of hours ago". He chuckled, hugged my shoulders, and we had a great few days. Oh ... He wasted no time in telling my dad how I did not even know my own rank... :-) :-)

Response by MSG Brad Sand made Oct 16 at 2014 1:00 PM

2014-10-16T13:00:25-04:00

My funniest interaction…afterwards…was as a Private, sitting behind my TOW missile system during a three day ‘war’ waiting for ‘enemy’ armor to advance down the road we were over watching. I can see the General out of my peripheral vision. He is climbing out of non-tactical vehicle with a long line of subordinate officers trailing behind him. At the time, the TOW was pretty new and, for our light infantry unit, pretty sexy? I see the General making a beeline straight toward me and all I can think is “Don’t come over here, please God not over here!” I stare straight into the site trying to pretend that the gaggle officers standing next to the gun jeep is not really there…”If I don’t make eye contact, they will not actually see me.” It is not too long before I hear the General asking, “Is this the TOW missile system?” I inform him that yes it is, while scanning my sector of fire, praying the enemy attack at that moment so I will be too busy to deal with all these officers.
A couple seconds later the General asks if he can up and look through the day-sight. Okay, I do not know who this guy is. He is not in my company; I do not know any of the officers trailing him like hungry puppies. Anyone could buy general stars at clothing sales…see stolen valor photos…and we are in the middle of a FTX, I am not climbing down from the jeep until someone I know tells me. I am finally forced pull my face away from the site and look at the General. I tell him, “No disrespect General, but I do not know who you are and no, you cannot look through the site. If my team leader or someone I know tells me to, fine, but I don’t know any of you guys.” I quickly stick my face back into the site and wait for the shit to hit the fan. I can tell the whole group is just standing there, I assumed staring at me, and finally one of the other officers…I think a lieutenant colonel…asks me “Where’s your team leader?” I point to the clump of bushes off to the right where he is pulling security. I hear some lieutenant stumbling through the brush to get my sergeant.
Next thing I know Staff Sergeant Meader comes stumbling out of the brush, and with a General and the officers standing around our jeep, and I am sure he was thinking ‘What the F did Sand do now?’ The colonel explains to my Team Leader that the General would like to look through the TOW site, and wanted to know if would be okay for the private to get down from his post? I’m told to get my ass down. I try to sneak off to ‘pull security’ a.k.a. get the heck out of there but am told to stand fast. General looks through the site gets down and seemed pretty happy overall. I guess generals are not used to being told ‘No’ by privates, let alone being told no by anyone without their own red flag or better?
After rereading…this might not be funny, but it was my funniest interaction…or at least the look on all the faces on everyone when I told him no was?

Response by SSG William Patton made Oct 16 at 2014 2:29 PM

2014-10-16T14:29:12-04:00

In 2008, Governor Bobby Jindal awarded the Louisiana Veterans Medal to all citizens of the state who had served honorably in the military. My sons and grandchildren, my lovely wife and daughters in law were present and other members of the family were there as well. I was last in line because my grandchildren wanted to meet the Governor. When my time came, the Adjudant for the Louisiana National Guard handed me my medal and commented that Patton was a good name for a combat soldier and then he saluted me, which I returned. First and only time I have ever been saluted by a general. It was a humbling experience.

Response by 1SG Harold Piet made Oct 16 at 2014 3:25 PM

2014-10-16T15:25:26-04:00

I was a 1SG at Campbell, I got called to go visit the CG of the 101st. The CSM told me to get my A$$ up there quick, a congressman had called the CG because I called a dirtbag an oxygen thief. He told his Mommy and she called her congressman because I hurt the little dirtbags feelings. (1994 or 95) I carried his packet up with me and showed the CG why I called the dirtbag an Oxygen thief. The CG was not to impressed and told me to never let it happen again. As I was leaving the CSM said get rid of your dirtbags and oxygen thiefs, but dont call them by their name. LOL

Response by SPC Todd Hanson made Oct 16 at 2014 5:33 PM

2014-10-16T17:33:30-04:00

We just did a RIPTOA and a Air Force 1star had a fit we did not give him cuts in the line to see the cashiers, he complained to the CO. All other flag officers had their aid make and appointment

Response by Cpl Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 16 at 2014 6:46 PM

2014-10-16T18:46:47-04:00

Standing gate duty at an restricted airfield in the middle of the night. A limousine pulls-up with the driver (enlisted somebody) handing me his ID and telling me he has VIP's which have to get through and onto the Airfield. "Ok, I need to see everyone's ID". Dark tinted window in back rolls down 3 inches, hand is held out of that space with an ID card (Col somebody). Disembodied voice from within the back (through the 3 inch gap of tinted window at 1am) "I have Gen. AM Gray here and he needs to get on that aircraft ASAP Marine!". "Ok, I need to see everyone's ID, please". A bit of cursing and yelling and eventually 2 more ID's make their way out the 3 inch gap in the tinted window. ID's look good, and indeed one is Gen A.M Gray. "OK, I need you to please roll down the window so I can confirm the ID's, please." Cursing, more cursing, something about my mother and father, cursing, cursing. "Sir I cannot allow you to pass the gate without proper identification and recognition". Cursing, window rolls down, I shine my light in, validate all occupants, render salute, validate against checklist, return ID's and pass them through.

Limousine pulls onto the airfield and I feel like I need to change my pants. Airplane leaves and limousine pulls back to the gate, the driver (enlisted somebody) "The General say's good job Marine". Limousine pulls away.

I need a drink...

Response by MSgt Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 16 at 2014 11:44 PM

2014-10-16T23:44:21-04:00

The first time I met Maj General Deppe (ret) (20AF/CC at the time) I was surprised by his BDUs. Slightly wrinkled with collars urned up, no creases. I thought he might be missing his enlisted days when he was a maintainer. Looked like he had just returned from a long day in the field.

Response by Sgt Private RallyPoint Member made Oct 17 at 2014 11:53 AM

2014-10-17T11:53:37-04:00

So when I was a young PFC, I wound up on a working party at a golf tournament at Camp Pendleton. For the most part I drove a golf buggy around, giving Company Grade Officer's wives a ride to the bathroom. But towards the end of the day, A Sergeant and I were told that we would be driving the CG of Marine Corps Installations West, who had been playing in the tournament, from the Golf Course to the air station, where he had a flight to catch. Well as we were driving, we approached a stop light with a big sign advertising the MCX that was at that intersection in 13 Area, widely known to the Marines and Sailors of Camp Pendleton as 'Mainside'. A few blocks down I could see a building flying the one star flag of the very Brigadier General who sat in my back seat. As the car came to a stop, the General leaned forward, tapped me on the shoulder and said, "Are we on base?"

I paused, stuttered, then replied, "Yes sir, this is Mainside." I stopped short of pointing out his office

Response by CPL Rick Stasny made Feb 8 at 2015 10:07 PM

2015-02-08T22:07:49-05:00

First, I'll start with a foreign general. In the MODA Building during Desert Storm. I was handed a message and told to get it to the War Room ASAP. It was about a 1/4 mile from our office. I cleared the last two flights of stairs in a single jump just in time to round the corner and knock the Saudi Chief of Staff down. In perfect English, he said my you are a big one. As I helped him to his feet and apologized to him.
Then a MG I was taking to the Officer's Club at MacDill for a meeting let out a scream from the back seat. I had pulled out in front of a truck. The truck I avoided, but he put the fear in me. As I opened his door and rendered my salute, he returned the salute and said quietly. We aren't going to discuss this with anyone, are we. I said no sir and just kept it to myself. I still would never throw his name out there.

Response by 1SG Cameron M. Wesson made Feb 9 at 2015 8:54 PM

2015-02-09T20:54:47-05:00

Memorial Day 1995.

I was the EOC NCO at Fort Campbell, KY and was on duty when then MG Keane came in.

It was around 1400ish hours.

I stood up and said, "Good Afternoon, Sir!... Air Assault!"

MG Keane points at the flag and loudly asks... almost yelling, "SSG Wesson! Why is the flag at full staff?"

"Sir?"

I'm confused and just then the FOD walked in... I looked at the FOD like... "is this is a test?"... the FOD looks at... me and then looks at the CG... but doesn't say anything.

Again I speak, "Sir I don't understand your meaning."

MG Keane points at the flag again and a little louder demands, "SSG Wesson! Why is the flag at full staff? It should be at half staff!"

I'm dumbfounded... surely he realizes its after 1200... but then I realize he doesn't really know flag etiquette .

"Sir, today is Memorial Day! On this day the flag is raised and lowered to half staff. It remains there until 1200... then the flag is then raised to full staff for the remainder of the day. This is protocol and the flag detail came in at 1155 and raised the flag to where it belongs... is there a problem?"

The look he gave me was priceless... and I knew he didn't know this... and his disposition changed.

When he spoke he said, "Oh, I didn't know that..." he looked at the flag and then at me and the FOD and said, "carry on" and he walked out without so much as an apology.

The FOD shook his head and laughed, "I've never seen him so embarrassed... Good Job SSG Wesson... that should humble him for a little while" the he walked out.

I learned a good lesson that day, don't jump to a conclusion and then berate someone until you have more information... and if your wrong... say so and apologize.

Response by SFC Vernon McNabb made Feb 10 at 2015 9:09 PM

2015-02-10T21:09:30-05:00

I was just finishing up a mission in Iraq moving troops around Baghdad, and on my last stop, I let off my passengers from my UH-60L. I watched as the two UH-60s in front of mine took off, but noticed a MG walking towards their aircraft then throwing his hands up in frustration. One of his aides, a CPT was close by so I asked if they just got left behind. He said "Yes", so I asked where they were headed. They were going to the same FOB as us, so I informed my pilots of the situation and they said to bring them aboard. Once they got on my aircraft, I gave the MG a headset, and he was gracious for the ride, but asked if we could get the other aircraft on the radio. We contacted them, and the MG had some not too nice words to say, and told them to land at our next destination, so he could "Thank" them personally for leaving him and his aide stuck on the FOB.

Response by MSgt Ramon Almendarez Jr made Feb 13 at 2015 1:03 AM

2015-02-13T01:03:30-05:00

At PISC as a Drill Instructor I was the Hat on duty and about 0200 the fire watch was pounding on the hatch letting me know that some one was trying to get in the squad bay. I grabbed my hat went to the front hatch to see who it was, looking though the porthole a LT was out on the landing tying to open the hatch. I open the hatch and reported PLT 376 , training day 45, and 72 recruits on deck sir, then the New Commanding General step through the hatch and said, "We have a problem Sgt when recruits are more afraid of stripes instead of bars and stars". I said, "No Sir, SOP states that no recruit will open a hatch btw taps and revile without a Drill Instructor present". The Pvt complied with his special orders, Sir !!! I always got outstanding fitness reports, but in the remarks my Commanding Officer always put, However Sgt Almendarez is always out spoken. As a Platoon Leader I was always out spoken when it came to my platoon.

Response by SFC Walt Littleton made Feb 13 at 2015 3:34 AM

2015-02-13T03:34:36-05:00

I was new to the 101st AB and a Spc5. The 1sg greeted me and told me we don't have Spc5s in this unit so he made me change all my patches to sergeant striPes. He also said that we don't have your MOS here so he asked me how my leadership was. I was assigned to the Armament Repair as the NCOIC. AT the time the 101st were short Artillery repairman and I had the only one who was school trained. A short time later he was killed in a traffic accident so there were none. I learned fast and learned the TM cover to cover. Guns were going down one after the other and all of them were lined up like parade at the shop. We were working day and night. This day I was under the belly plate working on the base and looked up. All I could see was starch and spit shine. So rolled out from under the gun and CG all the way down were lined sound the gun so I of course snapped to and saluted. He asked why the Divarty Guns are not mission ready. I told him that the division had no repairman and I taught myself and guys how to repair the guns. He was shaking his head and asking around the room how they had let this happen. My CO broke the chatter and told the CG to ask SGT Littleton what his MOs is. I told everyone in the group I was a Stretegic Microwave Communication Repairman. Exactly the CG said exact words, WFT IS THAT. I proceeded to tell him where I came from and that I was really a Spc5 but Top made me a leader. The CG was rolling laughing and I just stood there. The CG shook my hand and thanked me for stepping up to the plate looked at the 1 star and told him the SGT Littleton works directly for you and he is to call you on. Your direct line each morning at 0900 and give a gun status report. They gave me a chopper whenever a gun in the field went down day of night the chopper would land in the Motor pool and take straight out to the field to get the guns up. Did that for about 3 months till we got some new recruits in. See I was a 26V back in 1978 and was sent from Okinawa Japan working for DSA FIXED STATION to the real Army the 101st AB, 801st MT. I was a Spc5 lol. Apparently the army sent 12 of us 26v to Ft Campball to be ready to field new equipment. The equipment never came and I left for Korea and they sent right back there again but that's another story and unit lol. Air Assualt!

Response by SGM Private RallyPoint Member made Feb 15 at 2015 10:48 PM

2015-02-15T22:48:21-05:00

In 1976 I joined the 36th Airborne Brigade, Texas Army National Guard. Airborne units have a casualty rate somewhat higher than other units. It's hard to put 600 people into the air at 1500 feet without someone getting hurt, and there was always someone agitating for the Brigade to be disbanded.

A brigadier came down to look us over, and he was invited to ride along in a CH-47 on a jump. Of course, we knew he was looking for an excuse to shut us down. We were professional and well-behaved as the CH-47 started winding up its engines. As the wheels left the ground, every paratrooper on the bird stood up, hooked up, and started yelling and jumping up and down in the bird. One of the pilots could feel what we were doing and turned around to look at us, and two big guys went to the general and started yelling, "Come with us, Sir! You can hang on and we'll get you to the ground."

No one paid any attention to the jumpmaster, and no one could hear the general over the engines, rotor noise, and 30-odd screaming paratroopers, but the look in the general's eyes said he was afraid he was going to make his cherry blast right there. The green light came one, the big guys let the general go, and we exited the bird in about 10 seconds. (I didn't even check my canopy - I climbed a riser to avoid colliding with another paratrooper, and checked canopy after I was out of everyone's way.)

The general got back in his staff car, left the area, and was never seen again around the 36th Brigade. The Brigade survived until 1979, but a remnant remains as Ranger detachments in Houston and Austin. (The Airborne Mafia is alive and well!)

Response by CSM Charles Hayden made Feb 15 at 2015 11:08 PM

2015-02-15T23:08:55-05:00

CPT Brian Maurelli, One evening, the CG was going to visit night operations. He had a desert flower in his helmet band.

I said, "General, you can't wear that flower if you are going to the field. The CG puffed up like a bird, before he said anything. I said General, if you wear a flower on your helmet tonight there will be 10,000 tomorrow."

The CG was not appreciative, but removed the flower from
his helmet band.

Response by SGM Private RallyPoint Member made Feb 15 at 2015 11:36 PM

2015-02-15T23:36:28-05:00

In 2000 the Texas National Guard received the Bosnia SFOR security mission, and we started training for it. Battalions not selected for the mission (like mine) provided crowds, civilians on the battlefield, and other similar missions to those who were going.

We had a big FTX over 2 weeks long, and SFOR flew in a pair of French officers, a pair of Turkish officers, and the deputy commander of III Corps (Canadian) all who had experience in SFOR, but they could not get a Russian officer. The call went out, does anyone speak Russian?

As it happens, I do (not very well, but if you don't know Russian, how would you know?) So a Russian Spetznatz uniform was FedExed to the unit, and I spent the next two weeks as Major Georgi Krasnov, Liaison officer from the Russian Airborne Brigade.

I stayed completely in character for the entire two weeks, "translating" reports from the Russian unit roleplayers, and participating in staff meetings. The division chaplain asked to meet with me and explained that services would be available to soldiers from "my" unit. I explained in my broken English that the majority of our officers and senior NCOs didn't believe in God, but that I would pass along the invite.

After 4 days of this (I got this word later, from my Bn CO) there was a divisional staff meeting and the Chief of Staff says what a wonderful opportunity this was for the Texas National Guard to meet and work with foreign forces, and what a nice guy the Russian is.

But those are Colonels, and this is about interacting with Generals. At the end of the exercise, the foreign officers were awarded certificates and coins from the Deputy Commander of III Corps, a Canadian LTG. When he got to me, I said, "Spaseba, comrade general", (Spaseba = Thanks) and he about fell off the stage laughing. Of course, the certificate had my real name and rank on it, so he knew by then that I had been acting the whole time.

Response by SSG Adam Reed made Feb 16 at 2015 1:23 AM

2015-02-16T01:23:43-05:00

Not sure if this is funny but I'll tell it anyways. During my deployment to Africa I, an E-6, and my buddy, an E-7, had to brief the two star for our next mission. We were a small ten man unit with no officers. So as the General is going around the table talking to his cronies he finally gets to us last. I report all maintenance issues are fixed and the equipment / vehicles are good to go. My buddy commences to tell him the unit itself is not ready. The General asks why. My buddy begins pointing fingers (literally) at all the officers who are in charge of the J shops and tells the General the things they won't get us for the mission. I.E. maps, food, commo, supplies etc.
The General stands up points towards us and says, "whatever these men need they get. No questions asked." Needless to say we got what we needed and what we wanted.

Response by 1SG Private RallyPoint Member made Feb 16 at 2015 11:36 AM

2015-02-16T11:36:36-05:00

I was at Orchard Regional TC this summer. One of the ranking CSMs made the area around the DFAC of limits for tactical vehicles. Div CG was on a site visit and my BC asked me to bring his humvee over and park it near the DFAC entrance because he was going to escort the General around after dinner.

I grab the 2 star placard and park the vehicle and post myself next to it waiting. At least 5 angry looking senior NCOs approached me for corrective action regarding the vehicle parked in the no tactical area. I simply smiled and pointed at the 2-star placard as the would-be correctors quickly changed their demeanor with a "carry on Sergeant".

Response by CPT Private RallyPoint Member made Feb 16 at 2015 7:59 PM

2015-02-16T19:59:22-05:00

The most embarrassing one I had was when I was the OIC for Case Management at Ft McCoy. We were demobilizing a BCT, and my staff had the understanding "If it's important, knock and enter. If it isn't, don't knock and just wait until I open the door to ask."

I was dealing with a Soldier that had a lot on his plate, and heard a knock on the door. At this point, I stopped and looked up at the door. Nobody entered, so I said "Come in." Again, nobody entered. After the second knock, I said "Come in," this time a bit more irritated that they didn't open. Again, no entry. With 15 seconds going by, I stood up and excused myself and flung the door open to say "WHAT DO YOU NEED?".....face to face with a 2 star. I said, "I'm sorry sir. My staff knows if it's important to knock and come in...and I had said to come in, so I was just trying to get back to taking care of my Soldier."

He laughed and just told me to carry on.....but my staff was laughing so hard after that one. Oops!
v/r,
CPT Butler

Response by MSG Private RallyPoint Member made Feb 16 at 2015 8:32 PM

2015-02-16T20:32:40-05:00

My funniest interaction with a general officer was a few years ago when I was at annual training. I was leaving the DFAC and was nearly jumped by my state's Assitant Adjutant General. He honestly jumped over to me to shake my hand and ask me how my training was going. I was definitely taken aback and haven't had anything like that happen before or since.

Response by SGT Private RallyPoint Member made Feb 16 at 2015 8:38 PM

2015-02-16T20:38:37-05:00

My only contact with a General was in Vietnam. We were out in the field supporting the infantry and making extractions and assaults on VC villages. A helicopter flew in and they wanted me to report to the CO's office in AnKhe. I had no clue what was ging on. I kept asking myself what had I screwed up now. We arrived at my CO's and I went in his office. An Airforce General was in there with him. I snapped to, saluted, and asked what was going on. The General and the CO started to laugh. I guess I had that thousand yard stare and a shit eating grin. The General introduced himself and told me he was my dad's cousin and my dad had asked him to check on me if he could. He asked me how I was doing, did I like being a door gunner, and how much time did I have left. We talked small talk and he shook my hand and said he had to leave. I saluted him, he saluted me. He told me to stay safe, and To come home alive. I said I'd do my best. I was flow back to the field and was asked a hundred questions about what was going on. I told them a General wanted to see me and asked me how can we win this war. Of course they all said BS. I finally told them what had happened and they still didn't believe me. The war continued and I got back to what I did best which was hunting Gooks. The End

Response by SSG William Patton made Feb 16 at 2015 8:44 PM

2015-02-16T20:44:01-05:00

During my tour in Vietnam my buddies called me the nickname, "general" after General George Patton. During a presentation award for the 42 ARVN regiment by the Dep. CG from Nra Trang, one of my buddies called me by my nickname and then a derogratory comment meant as a joke. Unknown to him, the 2 star was around the corner from the position we were in and heard him. He thought the soldier was referring to him and a busted around the corner and began to eat the soldier who called me a new one. It took a few minutes to get the situation resolved, but needless to say, the general advised the soldier I was a sergeant, not a general and he should do away with my nickname, especially when a real general was on the facility. The general did not think the situation was nearly as funny as we did.

Response by MAJ Private RallyPoint Member made Feb 16 at 2015 9:00 PM

2015-02-16T21:00:55-05:00

In the Summer of 2008, I was in the G3-T for the 88th RSC. I was the OIC for the Operation Fit Warrior Program we had designed and implemented. My NCOIC was this bald-headed knuckle-dragging guy from the South Side of Chicago. Believe me when I say, the P.C. police would likely lock this "Old School" E-7 up and throw away the key! It was a Saturday morning, and we had just completed PT, but we had to send-up our daily report to Snelling (this is prior to the 88th's relocation to McCoy). The good SFC, being the good and resourceful NCO that he was, had made arrangements during the weekends to borrow a key to the one 88th building on McCoy at the time so that we could forward our daily reports. Remember, we're in APFTs, on a Saturday morning. We're about halfway through, and this older guy comes in, he's wearing an old ballcap a Fort McCoy MWR T-shirt (that doesn't completely cover his belly) khaki shorts, and old sneakers. He starts making small talk. Who we are, what we're doing... I'm being my polite usual self, answering, and taking bites of my granola bar. Old E-7, just looks at him, shrugs his shoulders, goes back to work. In my mind, I'm thinking, "Great, next I'll have to listen to the janitor's Vietnam stories!" Pretty soon, he starts to zero in on how we had gotten into the building; I defer to my NCOIC. Oh, I got the key from "snaggle tooth," he says, referring to the building receptionist, in a less-than-flattering manner. He then points at her desk, "That's Snaggle's desk, right there. She signs me out a key on weekends." Well, like I said, my NCOIC was in need of tons of COO training! It was then that I felt all of the oxygen momentarily being sucked out of the room, and then come flooding back out in an epic Two-Star hissy fit! In our defense, neither of us had ever met the man, and he definitely was not dressed like any other Two-Star I've ever met! I don't think it would have been that bad had my NCOIC referred to his receptionist as "snaggle Tooth," I just wish I hadn't taken a bite of my granola bar right at that moment because I damn near choked, and then the CG looked at me asked if all I could do was stand there and chew my cud like a God-Damned field cow? All ended well though; he gave me an ARCOM for my work 2 months later, so go figure.

Response by SFC Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 11 at 2015 9:33 PM

2015-04-11T21:33:22-04:00

I ran into MG Lynch in the DFAC on Camp Vicory in Iraq in 07... literally...I nearly dumped my yakisoba all over him!

Response by SPC Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 13 at 2015 2:13 PM

2015-04-13T14:13:56-04:00

A couple months ago I was in the motor pool doing Bradley training when the word was passed down that MG Gronski, the division commander, was in the AO. So I went and hid at the smoke point waited awhile, and snuck back to my Bradley. I had just started to climb up to the drivers hatch when I heard "Jones c'mere!" I still don't know who said it but I hopped down and jogged around the neighboring Bradley and was suddenly face to face with the General. He makes small talk and then asks me what I do civilian side. Discussion went like this:

Me: I work at my families restaurant
MG: What is it called?
Me: Cafe Jones
MG: laughs for a good two minutes

I still don't get what was funny

Response by MAJ Private RallyPoint Member made Apr 13 at 2015 5:06 PM

2015-04-13T17:06:47-04:00

I was assigned to drive a Marine BG around for a Warfighter in Seoul, S. Korea. I was an E-5 and thought it was great work compared to the field time I was used to. One night he decided to go out with other Marine and S. Korean Generals. After a few to many libations, BG pukes all over the back of the vehicle that I am driving him in and his uniform. He gets out and continues to puke. I got back to his room in Seoul made sure he hade it inside and then turned the van in as it was. I didn't even clean it out.

Same Marine BG a few weeks later and at the end of the Warfighter, he asks me for my full name and address. I know Marines very rarely give out so I wasn't expecting much. Before he left he thanked me for driving him and told me to look for something "special" in the mail. Fast forward a few weeks and I had already forgotten all about it. I checked the mail and received a cardboard tube from BG's aide. I open it up to find the "special" thing BG promised. IT was an autographed official Department of the Marine Corp Photo of himself. Not only did he sign it, he wrote a short note stating that I was wasting my time in the Army and should quit and join the Corp, where I could do better for myself. So, I did what any good Soldier would do, I framed and placed it on my desk for barracks inspections, telling all inspectors that he was my father.

Response by SSG Paul Setterholm made May 20 at 2015 2:22 PM

2015-05-20T14:22:09-04:00

3rd armored division general was leaving for pentagon position. Division standing at parade rest and he is giving speech. He ends it with,"bring it on in boys!" Entire brigade just stood there. "Bring it on in,boys! Bring it on in!" Entire division rushed the podium.
A funny inspection involving colonel. He was looking over my track for inspection. On my maintenance sheet I had "bullet hole in exhaust port" he paused. Walked over to look. Said,"I'll be damned!" And walked away without another word. Shortest inspection ever!

Response by SSG Warren Swan made Aug 20 at 2015 2:15 PM

2015-08-20T14:15:59-04:00

I was a MP stationed at Ft. Myer with duty at Ft. McNair. If anyone has been there, you see generals row. When one thinks of a general or flag officer, you think of this chiseled uber professional no nonsense man/woman who is WAY above your pay grade. As a PVT-SGT there, I got to see that after hours and that uniform came off, they're just as bad and ornery as the rest of us. Parties...Yup. LOUD parties...YUP. Arguing out loud....YUP. Coming through the gate drunk as hell, hollering the craziest stuff you can imagine...YUP. DRIVING in the gate DRUNK AS ALL HELL....YUP!!!! (and not one of them got a DUI. Go figure lol) But at the same time, I've seen them become human and come to the gate and talk to us as Soldiers, ask us how we're doing, about our families, even wave in cars (you should see the looks on folks faces), buy us food, or coffee when its cold, even invite us to their homes and promotion ceremonies with front row seats while other senior ranks stood. In uniform they are infallible, but out of it, some of them are as bad if not worse than some of the PVT's I've had.

Response by LCDR Private RallyPoint Member made Aug 20 at 2015 2:27 PM

2015-08-20T14:27:05-04:00

I was enjoying a few brews at a "low brow" establishment once when this crazy coot in a Magnum PI Hawaiian shirt and flip flops started dropping sea stories. I "assumed" I was in the company of a vet, probably someone who served a few years around the time I was still in junior high. We traded jokes, stories and beers till well into the early a.m.

The next day, one of the crew on duty told me that (a flag officer not named) called and wanted me in his office-ASAP! I didn't even take time to change...just hopped in the car and drove from the yards to the base and walked into the Admiral's quaterdeck carrying my hard hat and being glared down by a covey of staff officers.

Walked in, stood at attention...to find that the flag officer in question was none other than the "vet" I had been speaking to the night before. Over the next year or so, I learned a lot from that flag officer and gained a great deal of respect for him and the concern he showed to the people under his command.

Response by SGT Dave Tracy made Oct 6 at 2015 5:26 PM

2015-10-06T17:26:49-04:00

I told a 1 Star (and his full bird shadow) to STFU as I was trying to sleep. I couldn't see who was making the racket and had no reason to believe it was someone so far up the food-chain, but luckily for me, the response was not an epic ass chewing, but a brief apology(!) and the conversation which prompted all this was reduced to a wisper.
After about a minute I peeked out from my wooby and actually SAW who I just told off. After they left, they guy next to me who the brass were talking to tells me he damn near died when I said that. I replied something to the effect that I was still waiting for my heart to restart.

Response by SSG Warren Swan made Oct 14 at 2015 10:09 AM

2015-10-14T10:09:51-04:00

1994 Ft. McNair, Washington DC. NO SHIT....I was there. McNair was my first assignment as a newly minted MP. As such I had the "privilege" of standing on a pad of rubber in the middle of the front gate to inspect ID cards for people entering post. If you've ever been to McNair, you know there are roughly so many homes that belong to G.O's. One belonged to a four star who will remain nameless (GEN No-Name), and he was known for being quite the partier and social person. The MP PLT there has caught him passed out coming through the gate with his driver driving. No problem yet funny. Yes he was passed out. His wife was holding him to sit him up. And we've caught said GEN either coming through drunk in his POV a few times, to where he'd get near the gate, stop in full view of us and switch drivers. But being TOG also was on post (A Co TOG), we had an understanding that we wouldn't bust one of them unless they were really unruly, we'd just smoke their bags and drop them off at CQ (if we smoked em, we wouldn't report anything to CQ, they had a choice no double standards). But the GEN didn't have any of those worries. He was so brazen that he would drive his POV to the gate, tell us he'd been drinking, get out, and one of us would drive his POV and the GEN to his house. In the end, this GEN took care of us. No one messed with us or they'd deal with him, his CSM didn't allow anyone to give us shit or he'd get involved, and before he retired, he gave all of us coins personally as a thank you. He didn't have to do it. He knew we wouldn't bust him, but it was cool to see it nonetheless. He took care of those who took care of him.

Response by CPL(P) Private RallyPoint Member made Dec 23 at 2015 6:57 PM

2015-12-23T18:57:15-05:00

a couple decades ago I met a very elderly WWII vet that eventually became a General. I was playing with a Zippo and he asked me if I knew any tricks. So I flipped open the Zippo lighter with one hand and lit it by dragging it quickly across my pants. He said to me, "Son don't do that. I saw a private do that back in the war, had gasoline on his pants, burnt his pecker off."

Response by SPC Lyle Montgomery made Oct 22 at 2021 2:04 PM

2021-10-22T14:04:09-04:00

This was not me but a fellow grunt that i was next to. We were on Dong Ha mountain, also called firebase Fuller in Quang Tri Vietnam. A general had landed on the helopad and was walking around talking to the grunts on the bunker line. We had been cutting down trees on that steep hill to prevent the NVA from getting close to the top at night. My buddy was fileing a chain saw chain when the general asked him what his position was. He replied " Sir, I'm a fucking lumberjack" The general said nothing but I think he was laughing under his breath