Posted on Dec 8, 2013
SGT Public Affairs Broadcast Specialist
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I have only PCSed twice in my 6 years, and I always have trouble meeting new friends at the new location. At my first, it took me nearly 2 years, and now at my second, I've been here 2 years and still not really developed any really close friends.<br><br>So how do YOU do it... how do you find that close friend or group of friends after you arrive and your new duty station?
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PO3 Account Management Specialist
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Have you considered church? When I moved to Columbus, GA 5 years ago, from the Atlanta area, I never thought I would make any friends. The first 6 months or so, I was burning up gas on the road to go "back home" to Atlanta. For various reasons, we started church shopping, and found one that fit. We felt at home immediately. To this day, outside of the people I work with, all of the people I know in Columbus are a result of my church family.

The downside to the church thing is that my husband and I don't have kids, so there are some "family" events that we get left out or forgotten about. I may not have kids, but DANG I wish they would invite me to the birthday parties of their kids.....




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SGT Public Affairs Broadcast Specialist
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Oh, we've tried the Chapel, and met some wonderful folks, but nothing that just felt right... We've tried church shopping around as well, but there are only two or three English-speaking churches here (in Italy).  We've even been to the Men's/Women's groups at the chapel, and made some great acquaintances there as well...

Part of the issue, I think, is Rank... it's very difficult to deal with "this guy's Bill on Thursday night, but he's CPT Smith on Friday morning" kinda thing...


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PO3 Account Management Specialist
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SFC, I go to St Mark UMC off Whitesville Rd.
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SGM Matthew Quick
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I don't make new friends...I just keep my online friends where I go. ;)<br><br>Join a running group or get involved with local 5k/10k races. &nbsp;You'll meet a lot of different people and they mostly an encouraging group.<br>
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SGT Public Affairs Broadcast Specialist
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Online friends are well and good, MSG, but I feel the need for some real human interaction, like someone to play games with (besides go fish, crazy 8s, and G-rated Wii games) and bare my soul to... these things just don't happen for me with my online relationships...
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LTC Program Manager
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Why bother, you're just going to PCS in two years anyway.
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SGT Public Affairs Broadcast Specialist
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MAJ Miller, 

If I don't have at least one good friend, then I don't have a good excuse to get out of the house and just relax...
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SSG Stay At Home Dad
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SGT O, I found a good friend whom enjoyed my company, we would do many things together, go to the movies, go out to dinner, but we never drank together because we both don't drink, when help was needed I was their, when I needed help they were their for me, when I was helpless they would defend me and they were helpless I would defend then, 3 years later my friend gave me something that no other friend could, a baby, look at my pic that's my son, its been 8 years and were still together. she's my wife, and if I were still in the military, she would come with me every where. She's the only friend I trust.
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SGT Public Affairs Broadcast Specialist
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SSG Pabon,

I know what you mean... My wife truly is my best friend as well... and I love spending time with her and my two children, but I feel the need for a good male friend, too... someone to commiserate with when our wives are particularly grouchy, someone to laugh with about the little annoyances of marriage and fatherhood, and someone to hold me accountable to a higher standard for my family...
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SSG Stay At Home Dad
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<p>SGT O'Neil then you have one more person to look at: "Your Self", you are your own best friend, you are the one that knows you and you are the one who gives your self the best counsel. During my time in service, I had one friend, SGT Daustrome, when he PCS, I made up my mind: I am not going to have any more friends, and sure enough I didn't, even today I have friends, but never allow anyone close to my life. I prefer to be my own friend. My friends now are friends, because they all want something, one wants what I have on my mind, another is my friend because I'm a computer tech, but no one really wants me for me, except my wife, and even&nbsp;she wants something from me. </p><p>But friends can be found in the military, any time any day. </p><p>Within your Platoon, your company, church, volunteer group meetings and so on, or your can create a Self improvement program for your self and add that to your list, I did a self improvement program for myself in my days, It worked because I created it, I added every thing I liked, all the things I wanted to learn, from exercises in the gym, to reading USC title 10, reading leadership FM's, taking courses in college and correspondence courses, reading survival FM's to treating a day out with my family to the movies and dinning out together. Nothing in the military says you can't do, you can. along the lines you will meet some great people. But most of all have fun knowing that its yours and it works for you.</p><p>The question is I can not teach you how to find friends, how ever don't be surprise if when you stop looking they find you instead&nbsp;:)</p><p><br></p>
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