Posted on Jun 21, 2016
SSG Osint Crm
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Fddd257
Im aware the easy option is to kick him or her to the curb but new people usually have some uncertainty.
Posted in these groups: Images 20 NCOsLeadership development Leadership Development
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SSG Derrick L. Lewis MBA, C-HRM
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Edited >1 y ago
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As I am sure that my response will echo many of who have already posted. However, from my perspective with regards to your circumstance as this really is a challenging, yet sensitive issue for all leaders who posses empathy and want nothing less than the best for their Soldiers/team members. Before deciding, ensure that you do a full circle perspective before placing any type of judgement. First and foremost, if your Soldier has the definitive mindset that they are ETSing with no signs of compromise or negotiation, do not scoff at the decision. I say this because I have seen it far too many times during my 17 years where both peers and leaders will scoff at a Soldier's decision for wanting to exit military service coupled with the assumption that will not amount to anything in their next chapter; as if the military is the be all, end all. However, if the Soldier is uncertain on their decision, this is the opportunity to ground them back towards memory lane to the civilian on the street that walked into the Recruiting station looking for a change. What I mean is this: When most Soldiers join their respective military branch, it normally comes with a set of desires aimed towards personal goal achievement; albeit money for college, embark on their own independent career, provide for their family, and a wide array of other decisions. This is the time to gage the posture of that Soldier and their individual goals. This normally leads to open ended, fact finding questions such as "Why did you join the Army?" The Soldier will reply because of this reason...From there you ask, "Have you accomplished those personal goals that you set forth thus far?" Over 90% of the time, the answer is no. This serves as an opportunity for you to get them refocused on why they joined, and to use the next reenlistment opportunity as a chance to achieve those goals. After that option, then they can make a solid decision on continuing to serve or walk away. At least this will give them a peace of mind towards the next decision and ultimately prepare them for both their current career and the next chapter. Sorry for being long winded but I have seen this scenario play out too many times in which I both take to heart and have kept them to not only stay on the team and continue to provide their critical contribution factor, but to keep them honest towards their personal goals.
DISCLAIMER: THIS IS NOT A ONE SIZE FITS ALL BLANKET STRATEGY, AS SOLDIERS AND RESPONSES WILL VARY!!
Hope this helps and best of luck!
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SPC Michael Mead
SPC Michael Mead
>1 y
SGT Lee Hopkins - That echoes the experience I had. Only I was just a peacetime, stateside short-timer. Had enough of the stateside bullshit, decided against giving the Army a second chance and ets'ed after one hitch.
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SPC Michael Mead
SPC Michael Mead
>1 y
SSG Derrick L. Lewis MBA, C-HRM - "Courting and gestures?" Is that really what you call it?
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SSG Derrick L. Lewis MBA, C-HRM
SSG Derrick L. Lewis MBA, C-HRM
>1 y
SPC Michael Mead -Yes, it is nothing more than a polite explanation for support my friend.
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SPC Signals Intelligence Analyst
SPC (Join to see)
3 y
Literally the only answer and honestly the best answer. It's a lot closer to one size fits all than you think, outside of someone being irrational. It's something I've used towards peers and subordinates alike
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LTC Kathleen Maddox
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I think leading by example is the best way. Give them positive acknowledgement for an assigned task well done. Not everyone will be cut out for Army life but don't give up on a Soldier too soon.
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MSG Mechanic 2nd
MSG (Join to see)
>1 y
also think of this sm as your child, you dont want harm to come to them, you want the best, but in the end as a young adult they have the descision, you can give them the info and guidence thats all you can do
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Sgt Field Radio Operator
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>1 y
MSG (Join to see) - Leading by example is one part of leadership. You train hard for war to prepare for the physical hardships that you will encounter. The mental aspect is different, and worse because war is hell. All of us changed forever based on the experiences we endured.
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GySgt Efrain Vazquez
GySgt Efrain Vazquez
>1 y
In the Marine Corps they get weeded out at boot camp. My 20+ years in the Corps never ran into a Marine that wasn't proud and motivated to serve. Yeah they complained but when it hit the fan you can count on each other.
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TSgt Kenneth Hopkins
TSgt Kenneth Hopkins
3 y
Enlisted in '46 for three years, couple of months before discharge got married to my
Childhood sweetheart who was a coast guard service brat. She wanted me to get out
I wanted to stay in but took my discharge. Un beknownest to her I enlisted in the reserve,
Korea broke out, I was recalled to a time duty and told her I was staying in.
I stayed until 1967 and we were both proud of those twenty one years..yes, I was proud of every day I served....by the way, retired as a T Sgt....
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SGT Intelligence (S2)
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Something I see too often which leads to soldiers wanting out is the army either not providing opportunities that should be available or administrative errors that derail career progression. I've seen a specialist miss the promotion list (who should have been an E5) by 2 day because S1 sat on the paperwork, bonuses that are years overdue, promised schools fall by the wayside due to lack of funding, ect. The army should be a very professional organization that provides soldiers every opportunity to achieve. If the organization is screwing with soldiers financially or in career progression, it's hard as a first line leader to change the perception that the army can't deliver (when honestly the soldier's frustration is warranted.) If the army wants to retain good soldiers and morale, they need to deliver on promises.
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SPC Infantryman
SPC (Join to see)
>1 y
This is exactly why I left the national guard, I was promised schools, and a week before going for the plug pulled, I was slotted twice for wlc and got that pulled, I broke my contract after 3 years in and went active, I was told I couldn't keep my 11B mos unless I was airborne so I had to take 88m if I wanted to join active, so back to tradoc I go, we will see how this goes I may be done also if the same thing happens
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PFC Power Generator Technician
PFC (Join to see)
>1 y
This has to be the most realistic post on this subject. You actually understand how difficult it can be for different folks who are trying to succeed in something but it seems like every door is closing and they are just left stuck and trapped. I know all too well.
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SPC Jeremy Morgan
SPC Jeremy Morgan
>1 y
There's one factor that you forgot to mention and it's a real morale killer. Getting slotted for a school and a NCO from another company finds out and wants that slot for one of his guys, and because you're not 11B and the other guy is, you get bumped from the slot. This is also a byproduct of another problem. I was an 88M1P in an infantry regiment, so promotions that should have came through are suppressed by the command because they afraid of losing someone in your MOS because they only have so many slots for that MOS and they're not sure if they'd get another one to replace you. My squad leader tried to get me promoted to corporal but it was shot down by the battalion commander because there weren't any slots for an 88M1P NCO and they'd lose me.
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