Posted on Nov 30, 2013
1LT Battalion Logistics Officer (S4)
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The thought of working within a Special Operations Community has come up numerous times when I think of enhancing my career. I have been thinking about throwing my hat in the ring and see if being selected is possible. I am sure I can handle it mentally, however how is the family life? My family comes before anything and if it is rough, or more difficult than being in the regular Army it may deter me from attempting to join. Any thoughts,tips and or suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thanks for your time! 
Posted in these groups: Special operations logo Special OperationsC92a59d8 Family
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LTC Yinon Weiss
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In many ways, family life is better. Over the past decade, deployments were more frequent but much shorter. SOF doesn't do 12 month deployments for example.

The training is definitely extensive, and will take you away from your family during that time. If your spouse is not on board for that, it would make it extremely difficult.

Bottom line is... what is your definition of "more difficult?" If you are doing more of the mission that you are trained to do, does that make your life more difficult or easier? I think it's up to the individual as to how that affects them. In general though, I did not see any SOF-specific requirements cause additional stresses on people's relationships. It's one of those things where if the relationship is good, it will make it stronger. If the relationship is weak, it will make it weaker.
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CPT(P) Rifle Company Commander
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Major Weiss, in your experience how does it differ between active duty and national guard?
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LTC Yinon Weiss
LTC Yinon Weiss
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CPT(P) (Join to see) - Good question. National Guard Special Forces are definitely more operationally active than most conventional National Guard units. On the other hand, there is probably less waiting around and doing unproductive activities during drill. The units also tend to be much more flexible and understanding about individual Soldier needs. So which is better for family life? It again goes back to the personality of the person and what they are looking for.

There are also lots of Soldiers in the Special Forces National Guard who are looking for more training, more deployments, and more drill time... so for them, that is probably better or their family life because it supplements their income. For some, that would be completely unmanageable.

In short, special operations family life is great, but you have to want the special operations lifestyle to begin with... in my opinion.
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SFC James Baber
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I went that route with Delta early in my career when I was young and single, I think it would too much strain on both of you, even with a strong marriage, the life is very difficult with the drop of a hat departures and stress on the family never knowing where you are.
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1SG Special Forces Senior Sergeant
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This answer is actually a yes and no and hopefully my thoughts wont add to your confusion. I have spent the last 12 years in 7th Group and in that time have gone from Junior Commo to Team Sergeant. Overall I would wholeheartedly say that family life is better in SOF. The units are smaller and managed on a smaller scale with leaders having flexibility that is much greater than the conventional side. The average conventional structure is nothing but a meat grinder, turnover is high and many times leaders don't really know their guys. From my perspective it is the exact opposite and I will use my Team Sergeant time as an example.
First, my Bn Cdr and I were on the same squad in the Q course and my Company SGM was a guy I had known for over 10 years since I was brand new to group. I was single but didn't mean I didn't have large amounts of consideration for family guys.

One example was I had a guy about to start a month long course with long hours and travel involved, his wife had a bad visit to the Dr with more bad news to come when she was diagnosed with cancer. My CPT and I talked about (5 mins) and I decided to pull the guy from starting the course and reduced his work schedule to as needed for a few weeks until he could make some arrangements with family. All I did was pick up the phone and call my Company SGM, done deal.
Another was being deployed to South America when one of my guys who was deployed as remote as it gets called back and said his wife was having sever pregnancy complications. Once again, a phone call, helicopter ride, quick stop at the Embassy and he was on a plane home the next day. No hassle, no I need to talk to the Dr or Red Cross or anything.
Same with we send guys home to see their kids born, especially first born. Things have been going nonstop since 9/11, your first child only comes once. The leadership weighs it and decides, in almost all circumstances the Company and Bn leadership support their MSGs and CPTs.
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