Posted on Feb 26, 2019
Is being forced to miss the birth of your child and the only opportunity to take parental leave, in order to go to JRTC, lawful?
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I’ll try to explain this situation without violating any OPSEC.
So basically I am being told that I have to go to JRTC 10 days before my first child is due. BN Commander is giving NO consideration for anyone to miss JRTC, even the fact that my wife is a high risk pregnancy and has health issues of her own, and we have no one to take care of her while I’m gone. So the “generous” plan he has devised is that I’ll “go back for the birth” which means I’ll take a 12+ hour bus ride AFTER the report of my wife going into labor trickles down the pipeline (effectively, NO chance of being there on time). I will then have to go back to JRTC 2 days after the child is born.
Then add to it the fact that I am PCS’ing to a yearlong course with a report date 40 days after we get back from JRTC. So at a minimum, 40 days – 10 days PTDY (house hunting) – 7 travel days(if I didn’t want to take extra leave) - 10 days clearing = 13 days left to take care of everything needed for a cross-country PCS. Since my class is a year long, and parental leave must be taken within 1 year of the birth or it is lost and it can’t be taken in conjunction with or as PCS leave, if I do not take the leave before I PCS then it will be lost. I feel like this could be considered as the BN Commander denying me the opportunity to take parental leave, which is an entitlement, not a privilege. At the very least, it could be seen as causing undue hardship with the short PCS.
My counter to this has been that if I were about to stay behind the whole time or come home when the baby is born, I could take my parental leave while the unit is gone, then when they return I would be on hand to help with all barge ops/reset/inventory/etc and have time to do a proper hand over of my work in the unit before I start clearing. Company Commander and 1SG were on board with this plan, until the BN Commander's plan came out.
What does everyone think? I have talked it out extensively with my Company Command team. Assuming they've been passing all the details of situation up the BN CDR, and he has chosen to ignore it, should I attempt BN CSM/CDR open door policy? BDE open door? IG? Thanks for any advice.
Admin note: Nobody ever wants to go to JRTC, but if it were under other circumstances I would be fine with going. I understand having to make sacrifices, but this is a training rotation, not a deployment. It is not a sacrifice that HAS to be made, or that will have any better of an outcome by me being there rather than not. This command has been very open about the fact that it’s a number’s game. They don’t care what adverse situations they are putting Soldiers into as long as they get their numbers.
So basically I am being told that I have to go to JRTC 10 days before my first child is due. BN Commander is giving NO consideration for anyone to miss JRTC, even the fact that my wife is a high risk pregnancy and has health issues of her own, and we have no one to take care of her while I’m gone. So the “generous” plan he has devised is that I’ll “go back for the birth” which means I’ll take a 12+ hour bus ride AFTER the report of my wife going into labor trickles down the pipeline (effectively, NO chance of being there on time). I will then have to go back to JRTC 2 days after the child is born.
Then add to it the fact that I am PCS’ing to a yearlong course with a report date 40 days after we get back from JRTC. So at a minimum, 40 days – 10 days PTDY (house hunting) – 7 travel days(if I didn’t want to take extra leave) - 10 days clearing = 13 days left to take care of everything needed for a cross-country PCS. Since my class is a year long, and parental leave must be taken within 1 year of the birth or it is lost and it can’t be taken in conjunction with or as PCS leave, if I do not take the leave before I PCS then it will be lost. I feel like this could be considered as the BN Commander denying me the opportunity to take parental leave, which is an entitlement, not a privilege. At the very least, it could be seen as causing undue hardship with the short PCS.
My counter to this has been that if I were about to stay behind the whole time or come home when the baby is born, I could take my parental leave while the unit is gone, then when they return I would be on hand to help with all barge ops/reset/inventory/etc and have time to do a proper hand over of my work in the unit before I start clearing. Company Commander and 1SG were on board with this plan, until the BN Commander's plan came out.
What does everyone think? I have talked it out extensively with my Company Command team. Assuming they've been passing all the details of situation up the BN CDR, and he has chosen to ignore it, should I attempt BN CSM/CDR open door policy? BDE open door? IG? Thanks for any advice.
Admin note: Nobody ever wants to go to JRTC, but if it were under other circumstances I would be fine with going. I understand having to make sacrifices, but this is a training rotation, not a deployment. It is not a sacrifice that HAS to be made, or that will have any better of an outcome by me being there rather than not. This command has been very open about the fact that it’s a number’s game. They don’t care what adverse situations they are putting Soldiers into as long as they get their numbers.
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Posted >1 y ago
Responses: 10
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So at least he is thinking- due to Mission, he doesn't have to give you squat! How many troops have deployed and come home to see the 3-6 month child for the 1st time? I understand the frustration and worry, but you know the old adage "If the Service wanted you to have a wife, they would have issued you one!" Life ain't fair and at ain't a rose garden, sometimes you just go for broke, if you can't reconcile this, then the door is always available.
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SGM Bill Frazer
Charlie- JRTC was probably planned and put on the calendar a year ago, wife is 9 months preggers. I understand both sides but we both know that sometimes family takes a back seat to mission. He's an E6 so he can count, we don't know his duty position. If I was the CDR I damn sure would want all my key leaders on hand. A JRTC flunk is similar to an NTC flunk- the Chain of command could/would suffer for it, and a ton of cash would be wasted.
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SSG (Join to see)
SGM Bill Frazer - Roger, this rotation has been on the calendar for a while. However, The pregnancy was something we trying for but not timing, and I feel there is NO justification in the Army for saying "sorry honey, I have JRTC in 9 months so we better stop trying to have a baby. Wouldn't want our family to get in the way of training." The short-notice PCS also came as a surprise. As far being a key leader, I completely agree. However with the gross mismanagement of certain duty positions in this unit, it has become a moot point. For CBRN, I am the senior enlisted CBRN Soldier in the BN. By doctrine, part of my duty description includes being the senior advisor to the BN Commander on all things CBRN related. However, in 2 years they have never sought my input on anything CBRN, have ignored any advice I have volunteered, chose to run any CBRN scenarios during FTXs themselves without any guidance from the SME (Me), failed to adequately train the unit for CBRN events, and have prevented the junior enlisted 74Ds in this unit from doing their job (one is CMD Group Driver, one has been in S3 as nothing more than a detail body). To me this is an indicator that the Command does not view CBRN as an important aspect of JRTC, and therefore I would not be considered a "key leader" which further reinforces the perception that I am just a number to them.
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SGM Bill Frazer
Understand you're P.O'd, But this is not the forum to put down your unit even if it is the 101st. You still have ways- Chaplain, open Door to the CSM and or Bn CDR. I can see you side, but I have served too long with good folks, that missed their kids birth. Hell my Dad spent a year in WWII and 2 yrs in VA hospitals. Numerous of troops couldn't get but couple a days off with their wife during deployment after the baby was born. Lost 2 cousins during TET that never saw their babies being born. Sorry but feelings are like assholes, everybody has one, the Service is a hard taskmaster, if it was easy, anybody could do it. Instead of "crying Foul", exhaust all your links.
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CPT Daniel Cox
SSG (Join to see) - Realize that if your Battalion or any of the Companies fail the CBRN portion of the JRTC you will be to blame, whether they have taken your advice or not. As a DIVARTY (Artillery Brigade) Chemical Officer (1LT) I was called to task when two battalions failed their EDRE a month after the new DIVARTY Commander took command. Luckily, something I had learned as an enlisted man saved my ass. Always document everything. If you do not have memos to yourself every time you tried to do your job and were rebuffed, you will be the fall guy in the event of catastrophic unit failure. Be prepared for the worst outcome and be pleasantly surprised if it does not occur. Whether they are using you properly or not, as the CBRN SME you are a key player in the Battalion and I can see the Battalion CDR's rationale in having you deploy for training.
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Leave is completely up to the commander. You have 45 days from the birth of your child to take 10 days off. I understand your frustration but not much you can do about it but put it on the command climate survey.
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SSG Hackney - I feel for you! I understand both sides of the argument, as I’ve been the one to tell Soldiers they will go to the field. I understand “mission first” - but there are always exceptions. Some empathy and compassion from your chain of command wouldn’t hurt though. Can you get a letter from your wife’s Dr stating this is a high risk pregnancy and they recommend you be there? Couldn’t hurt.
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