Posted on Feb 24, 2020
PFC James (LURCH) Janota
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I was in the Dentist office with my kids and my Son, who has ASD, was fighting the Dentist and prevented him in doing what he needed to be done. I got aggravated and started to get a little hostile towards my Son. All I want is the best for him but he needs to have certain things done and I guess I'm not doing things right. I've been through books and a few counseling sessions to try and learn how to handle both of our anxieties. Nothing seems to be working. He's 13 years old and I should have already had this licked by now.
Posted in these groups: Parenting logo Parenting78568930 PTSDStress unhappy face 400x400 Stress07f1cd1e AngerAutism
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Responses: 10
CSM Charles Hayden
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Continue seeking assistance from professionals. And be professional, not angry with your son. PFC James (LURCH) Janota
Being an Alzheimer’s caregiver caused me to attend and benefit from several classes.

Use, “If he could, he would”, as just a little mantra for you to focus on and think about when there is a problem.
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CH (CPT) James L. Machado Workman
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Children with ASD do not necessarily respond to more “traditional” approaches to parenting particularly when they are distressed. If possible you may want to try to find a dentist who specializes in pediatrics and maybe even has experience with ASD children. Depending on where your son falls on the spectrum going to the dentist could present significant challenges for him. As for how to handle yourself-be patient with yourself. Remind yourself that you are doing the best you can and that you are a good enough parent. That’s all you have to be. Try to find compassion for yourself and your son and remember that your dentist deals with all kinds of patients. Your son’s response to his anxiety or the overwhelming stimulation of being at the dentist IS NOT A REFLECTION OF YOUR PARENTING. It’s just his stress reaction and that’s all. Breeth deeply and be proud that you made the time to take him to the dentist.
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1SG Civil Affairs Specialist
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It isn't easy.
I struggle with this too.
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