Can I take a second wife?

There's this woman. She's really hot and reasonable. I don't have to leave my wife. She's okay with being number two, and it seems that the government is okay with me having two wives. Maybe even four. I know that there are laws against bigamy still on the books, but no one is enforcing those any more, are they? Yes, and I know that we persecuted Mormons for polygamy until they abandoned the practice, but they weren't real Christians so they didn't count, did they?

My wife an I visited homes for sale in a nearby "high class" neighborhood not too many years ago and found one owned by a Middle Eastern sheikh that had seven bedrooms with en suite bathrooms for his seven wives. So it seems that local officials won't be a problem.

No, I can't afford a house with seven bedrooms for seven wives. To be honest, I can't afford one wife let alone two, but that doesn't seem to be a problem. It appears that the government will help me with that.

So, what do you think? Will the government allow me to have more than one wife or will I have to convert to Islam for the privilege?

BTW, my wife has a question: Is bigamy justification for homicide? I'm not sure why she's asking. Do you have any idea?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0R81h6rWgtU