Dealing with suicide

First, I so very sorry for your loss. Please know, you are certainly not alone, and so many of us are wading around, looking for ways to cope with the pain, while at the same time, trying so hard to find a way to make that the last loss of its kind.

I wish I had some brilliant, amazing answer for you, Cpl... I wish I could just pull out the perfect words, because that see-saw of grief and guilt is the worst experience. You grieve for the person who took their life, while at the same time, you feel rage at them for doing so, and leaving you to pick up all the little pieces while trying to make sense of it all, then, just when you think you have got a handle on it, along comes the grief, like a fist wrapped around your heart.

So far, in my life, I've lost seven people who took their own lives. The thing is, four of them were terminally ill, and I understood that... didn't agree with it, but I certainly understood it. The loss was still as devastating, no matter why it happened.

Speaking from experience, I can tell you, if someone comes to you, needing to talk, you listen... you don't walk away, because the guilt that is waiting when you just shut someone down and tell them you can't listen to them, is five times the pain, my little brother... not something you ever want to feel or to live with as I do.

You do a little research get a few phone numbers, get a support system going for yourself, a list of helpful people and numbers, and then, when you need them, you use them as well, because being that last line of hope for a fellow 1%'er can leave you with the same state of mind.

Most of us are wading around in this right now, trying to find the magic word or the right way to hang onto our more fragile brothers and sisters, and we just keep loosing them... All we have right now, is each other, and yes, its going to hurt, but we have to keep holding each other up, because its obvious no one else will.

Call the Marine recruiter. Introduce the two of them.

I'm so sorry for the pain, of a loss brother in arms. Prayers up for his family. Stay strong brother. Here is someone I met on here you can email personally if you need to talk.



Kathe Skinner, M.A., L.M.F.T,

Marriage & Family Therapist at Private Practice (Mental Health Services)
Colorado Springs, CO

I hear you brother. I loose 1-2 brothers every year like clockwork. It is just damned crazy. Some was kinda expected, some was straight out from stage left. I have realized that I cannot do anything... i have tried with various results.

CPL Wing, I am so sorry for your loss. I have lost a great deal of friends and family in my lifetime, and the sadness never goes away. The way that I deal with loss is to remember all the good times that you had. Try not to think of arguements or disagreements you may have had, as they aren't important. Just know that they meant a lot to you and I am sure that you meant a lot to them as well. Talking to someone about how you are dealing with this and seeking some grief counselling is a great path to follow. I know God will bless you and give you peace. All my best!