Debating on getting out of the Military

SSG White,<br><br>Your emotions might be getting the best of you right now because you're currently deployed.&nbsp; I would wait until you get back to make a decision.&nbsp; By the time your time is up you will be over half-way to retirement.&nbsp; I do understand the need to be with family though.&nbsp; There are many pros to staying in the Army but ultimately you have to do what's best for you and your family.&nbsp; In my opinion family outweighs everything.&nbsp; Good luck and get home safe.<br>

Not sure if this will help you out because every unit is different and plus we are of different breed and situation. &nbsp;I just ended my active service in the Corps after 9 years, over 4 of those years were spent in Iraq, Afghanistan, and many other southwest asian countries. &nbsp;The operational tempo for me was not going to stop despite requests for doing special duty assignments like drill instructor or recruiting to place me in garrison for 3 years +. &nbsp;I always found myself in units where I couldn't be released due to MOS shortage and importance in command billet. &nbsp;In order for me to catch that break from conducting deployments and short missions overseas, I decided to transfer to the Select Marine Corps Reserve. &nbsp;The SMCR has given me more than a break but allowed me to stay plugged into the Corps that I love so much and the time to raise my daughter and time with my wife. &nbsp;A weekend a month, two weeks a year, to continue what I do best and love, while being able to pursue other interests full time, spend more time with family, and still have great health, dental, and retirement benefits was a selling point for me to go into the reserves. &nbsp;Another point for staying in partly and not fully separating was staying plugged into the Corps for when that time comes again when our nation engages in another major conflict, I would feel great obligations to serve and wouldn't be able to do so again in the Corps unless I stayed in it in some form. &nbsp;

Don't know your MOS or anything, but have you considered the United States. army Reserve and changing career paths. We have a lot of different options that might benefit you. Send me a message if interested and I can give you some tips that might benefit you.

SSG White, when I reached my 10th of service, I had to decide if enough was enough or do I continue. I 'm glad I stayed and it's allowed me opportunities that I am very grateful for. SGT(P) Howe brought up a good point about recruiting that it could be an option to apply for the AGR program. Check out your state's ARNG HRO website for opportunities. Changing MOSs is not a bad thing, in fact I think it makes you more marketable and shows a willingness to change to further your career. 

Here's the deal SSG White,<br><br>If you elect too stay in, do so based on YOUR desires alone. If you get out, do so on YOUR desires alone. Your ex-family shouldn't play a role. I say this not because I am insensitive but because if you make either decision on a family that you're no longer part of, you will likely hold them responsible in some way, even subconsciously. Make the decision purely based on what YOU think and no other. Leave the "my daddy wasn't around" drama out of it - that plays no bearing in what you want to do for your daughter. Base your decision on what you feel is right and what you can afford to do. Trust me when I tell you, if you get out and can't find employment, your life will become difficult if you can't pay the bills...If your civilian job is solid than you should be okay. The bottom line is don't over think your decision and make it for yourself. You are the one who has to lay your head down on your pillow at night (no one else) so the decision you make must be truly yours based on only your feelings, lest you may blame someone else if things go awry. I've been where you're sitting regarding the decision point and two kids with their mother. You can only make it for yourself - the rest you cannot control.<br>

SSG White, I'm right there with you. I have over 11 years TIS, and I'm not indefinite yet, my ETS is next year. So I have a choice to make; do another 9 (at least) or ETS. I'll share a few of my thoughts. People say "do you want to feel like you wasted 11 years?". Well to me, it's not wasted. I invested 11 years to make myself very marketable, gained some of the best experiences, went to college, and got paid while doing it. You know, the minute that you realize that you're in this for the retirement check, you can't throw the "service to country" trip on somebody. Also, take the time, and I mean a LOT of time, and shop around with employers. Talk to HR directors and see what's out there and look at their compensation packages. For example, I'm in healthcare recruiting. There's a hospital system offering me a job with a base pay that's more than my total pay, plus they offer bonuses. They offer free healthcare, just no dental. 3 weeks paid vacation, paid holidays,&nbsp;and they have a 401K matching program. Now I know it comes with a risk, civilian companies can fire you without warning, I'm just saying to leave no stone unturned to see what's out there. But overall, do what you love. You'll find companies, like I have, that offer similar packages that the military offers. Then again, a civilian company won't get you discounts and freebies like the military. I just want to point out that I'm not taking that job, it's not the direction I want to go, I'm just saying that opportunities are out there just like there are opportunities in the service. I still don't know what I'm going to do, I just know that I'm not using the "retirement" package (if it even exists 11 years from now) as a decision maker. We've got one life my friend. Do you love what you do now? Or would you be happier elsewhere?

I'm a little late to the party, but I have an often under-appreciated option: reenlist with concurrent assignment to the IRR. That way you can return to a drilling status fairly easily, you continue to earn time in service, get some retirement points, you can even get promoted if you play it right. It's not great on the benefits front (no Tricare, expensive dental), but slightly better than separation.

If you get out completely, you'll have a much tougher time coming back in.