Do you think your military service has made you a better, or worse parent, compared to those that have not served?

I think my military service made me a better person. I think being a better person made me a better parent.

I don't think it ultimately matters. No one is an expert at parenting. Everyone is learning on the job as a parent from the day their first child is born even up until that child is an adult.

I was 10 years in when I had my only child. I had a lot of nieces and nephews and her dad has 3 other kids who I have known since they were little. But I definitely had no idea what I was doing when I gave birth. Then I got thrown a curve ball with her diagnosed with a rare genetic kidney disorder at 6 weeks old. I definitely had no comparison for that since no one in my family or my ex husband's family has dealt with anything like that. Add in that I was doing it alone even when I was married. I had to learn on the go every single day for the last 7 years through all of it. I don't know if being in the military has made me handle it better than someone who isn't.

My dad never served in the military and I think he was a pretty good dad. He wasn't perfect - no one is. But he did the best he could given the situation he faced with my mother. He basically raised five kids on his own. He worked two jobs at a point. He taught us discipline yet never ever put hands on us. Never abused us in any way. After having a child I look back and think yeah he had some missteps but again, everyone learns on the job as a parent. Everyone will parent differently and it's going to be based on how one was raised. A lot of people have generational trauma they have to overcome, or some people continue it.

I don't think being in the military makes anyone better or worse at anything compared to those who didn't serve. I think it depends on the individual.

I can't rightly say that my serving has made me a better or worse parent by comparison. I just try to do what's right by my kids and for my kids as best I can. I mean, that's all any of us can do, really. Although we do find shitbirds both in and out of the Service that are parents. We also find people that are great parents both in and out. It all boils down to the individual.