Posted on Feb 26, 2015
SFC Josh Jackson
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Hello, my people! I was recently asked to provide input on an NCOER we're writing for an E-6 who recently transferred to our shop. His losing unit did not write him an outgoing NCOER, so of course it falls on us to pick up the pieces.

The losing unit sang his praises, offering gushing adoration for this guy. But when we pressed them for bullets, they were unable to come up with anything concrete. Their failure to point to specific accomplishments more or less matches our observation of him.

He's a guy that would probably do well if we still had SP6 as a rank. So when my counterpart (his new rater) asked for bullets, this was my tongue-in-cheek reply:

* Can successfully inhale and exhale in sequence without supervision
* Routinely laces boots without causing loss of circulation to feet
* Surfs social media on his cellphone better than any other E-6 I've observed
* Maintains steady temperature in whatever chair he is occupying

So I thought I'd throw this topic out to all of you. Any humorous evaluation comments you've seen, or wish you could've included in writing one? Please share!
Posted in these groups: 1024px smiley.svg HumorEvaluations logo Evaluations1efa5058 NCOERBilde2 OER
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Responses: 401
Maj Commander
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"Shows great initiative but needs to work on followt"

"Optimistic NCO who demonstrates high degree of confidence despite skills/aptitude"

A positive one:
"Could eat coal and crap diamonds! Promote yesterday!!"
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MSgt Timothy Brock
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Eager to volunteer, when told to do so.
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LCDR Daniel Lanotte
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His men will follow him anywhere; not because he is an effective leader, but just to see what he will do next.
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SrA Daniel Jenkins
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A young Security Forces Airmen crashed a police cruiser and his NCO tried to pass this bullet on his EPR:

Procured funding for new police vehicle.

Sadly did not make it to the signed copy.
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SSgt Senior It Security Analyst
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"Get a fire extinguisher, this Airman is on fire! Promote now!"
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SSgt Boyd Welch
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"Out of all the people to ever come through this squadron, he is definitely one of them..."
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SSG Scott Warthan
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Is a successful form of matter, carries weight and takes up space with efficiency.
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MAJ Alvin B.
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Comments I am aware of include:

This member Is followed simply out of idle curiosity.
This member is the best example of average I have ever seen.
In time this officer may become an exceptional Lieutenant.
We have failed in every attempt to ignite any spark of leadership.
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SMSgt Thor Merich
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*Consistently excels at being mediocre
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MSG Bn Sr Maintenance Supervisor
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Not an NCOER comment but on a 1059 for a soldier who failed hw/wt at NCOES when it was allowed.

o well rounded Soldier
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SSgt Carpenter
SSgt (Join to see)
>1 y
Excellent
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SFC Josh Jackson
SFC Josh Jackson
>1 y
I see what you did there!
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