Posted on Feb 26, 2015
SFC Josh Jackson
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Hello, my people! I was recently asked to provide input on an NCOER we're writing for an E-6 who recently transferred to our shop. His losing unit did not write him an outgoing NCOER, so of course it falls on us to pick up the pieces.

The losing unit sang his praises, offering gushing adoration for this guy. But when we pressed them for bullets, they were unable to come up with anything concrete. Their failure to point to specific accomplishments more or less matches our observation of him.

He's a guy that would probably do well if we still had SP6 as a rank. So when my counterpart (his new rater) asked for bullets, this was my tongue-in-cheek reply:

* Can successfully inhale and exhale in sequence without supervision
* Routinely laces boots without causing loss of circulation to feet
* Surfs social media on his cellphone better than any other E-6 I've observed
* Maintains steady temperature in whatever chair he is occupying

So I thought I'd throw this topic out to all of you. Any humorous evaluation comments you've seen, or wish you could've included in writing one? Please share!
Posted in these groups: 1024px smiley.svg HumorEvaluations logo Evaluations1efa5058 NCOERBilde2 OER
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Responses: 396
TSgt Robin Minor
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And I quote..."performs like a dog on a hunt" The NCO in question was a member of the Air Force Security Forces. The comment was from our 1st Sgt who thought it would be funny and to see if it would be kept in once it hit upper level coordination. It did.
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SSG John Connell
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Regularly demonstrates to superiors, peers and subordinates the effects of poor leadership
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SSG John Connell
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Willingly delegates responsibility to subordinates when confronted.
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CW4 Angel C.
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Here's my take on some people I've worked with and/or for in the Army:
* best "YES MAN" I've observed in 20+ years of service
* top 1% candidate for officer force-reduction
* promote during Obama's third term
* places superiors above his own troops; a true follower

Hopefully nobody got offended but YES there's this type out there!!!
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MSgt Jason McClish
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Bahahahahahahahaha!!!
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LTC Russ Smith
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"If men were to follow this officer in to battle it would only be out of idle curiosity."

"During the rating period this officer went from undistinguished to disastrous."

"During the rating period this officer hit rock bottom and continued to dig."

"This officer cannot meet the shoddy standards she sets for herself."

My personal favorite from the National Guard circa 1994:

"His company performed admirably during the Los Angeles Riots under the capable leadership of his executive officer."
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Richard Burzlaff
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As a leader his men would follow him anywhere...but only out of morbid curiosity.
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1SG John B. Enlow
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Subordinates will follow him anywhere - just to see what he will do next
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CAPT Kevin B.
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Edited >1 y ago
Sat some boards. Some are on purpose like: LT Jones pushes doors market "Pull".

Many are well intended but just don't come out right: PO-1 Jones has been pursuing his college degree for 15 years. Motivates everyone, especially on Sundays. Maximizes participation on Bingo Night. Doesn't sweat.

The old system didn't have a thesaurus so: Invites exfoliation. The breast I've ever seen. Stands erectile.

Probably many more but it'd take some cognac to dig them up..... Oh, did someone already say "Hit rock bottom and started to dig"?
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LTC Program Manager
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The worst NCOER I've ever seen was all SAT, no comments
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