Posted on Jan 29, 2021
SGT Military Police
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On orders to PCS overseas, but cannot add my step child to my orders because her biological father who has never been in her life is on her bc.... Any help would be appreciated?
Edited 4 y ago
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SFC Kelly Fuerhoff
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Edited 4 y ago
That's not up to you to handle. Legally, as a stepparent, you can do nothing.

You cannot remove a parent from a birth certificate. If you are willing, you can file to adopt the child but that still would require contacting the birth father to agree with it.

Your spouse needs to talk to a lawyer about this.

Some lawyers do free consultations (about 30 min). I'd start looking for those adoption attorneys who do free consultations.
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SFC Kelly Fuerhoff
SFC Kelly Fuerhoff
4 y
CPT Lawrence Cable They reissue a new birth certificate. So they're making a new birth certificate. Not changing the original.
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CPT Lawrence Cable
CPT Lawrence Cable
4 y
SFC Kelly Fuerhoff - Correct, but the original copy is no longer the official copy. If you lost it and had to get a new copy from the state, the changed copy from the adoption would be what shows up.
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SGT Military Police
SGT (Join to see)
4 y
Update: Happy Valentines and Presidents day
I posted twice on this site thinking it was reddit, sorry about that.

- Levy was able to use documents from my Wife's home state where they tried to serve him, we found a lawyer to take our case as well.
- Levy and my Battalion S1 told me that I needed to fill out a DA 4187 for a 90 day deferment (I typed up and signed It before I took leave at the end of January)
- We are currently doing the Family Overseas Screening portion of the Order Amendment to add my family.
- Unfortunately, I was told that because it is so close to my report date, I may not be able to amend my orders because my Unit S1 was still working on my 4187.

What do I need to do to make sure that my family is taken care of?
I canceled my HHG move to please my leadership last month because they needed me for LFX, but now I'm being told that I need to act like I'm still leaving in March. I haven't been told how and what I needed to do at this point and there is never a definitive answer when dealing with them.

I will post this as an answer in the future.
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SFC Donna Bush
SFC Donna Bush
4 y
I was adopted by my stepfather and the Commonwealth of PA just issued a new one with his name on it as my father. My biological dad at first didn't want to sign the papers but my mom reminded him of all the back support he owes so he signed the papers because he didn't/want to pay back support.
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MSgt Don VandeBogert
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Couple options...

1. If you can contact him, and he agrees, there is paperwork that can be done authorizing your step kids to accompany you. Had a SSgt in a similar situation to your description and the local MPF helped with what was required. Personnally, I had to have my kids egg donor allow me to take my kids to Germany for 4 years (she was in jail, I wasnt on the BC but had custody). Real PITA but doable.

2. Talk to a lawyer. After my overseas assignment I ended up married (not to the egg donar thankfully) and we were able to have her rights removed and go through an adoption process adding both me and my wife to their BC as well as a last name change. Cost us ~$3500 and was done in ~6 months in Oklahoma. Worth every penny.

Good luck.

V/R
Bogie
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SSG Intelligence Sergeant
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Check the divorce papers. If she has full custody then it won't be an issue. That's what we did. Worked out well. Other option is getting him to sign a notarized paper saying he is ok with it.
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SSG Intelligence Sergeant
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Hmm. Likely have to just have to get him to sit with a notary and bless off on it. Aside from that, might meet to start looking at adoption.
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SFC Retention Operations Nco
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SGT (Join to see) still need a formal custody agreement giving the mom full custody. You can't legally remove a Birth parent From a birth certificate
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SFC Kelly Fuerhoff
SFC Kelly Fuerhoff
4 y
SGT (Join to see) - In some states, establishing paternity consists of signing the birth certificate. Some there is supposed to be that signed and the Acknowledgment of Paternity as well. You could find out if his paternity was actually established based on the state the child was born in.

But ultimately - you cannot take a parent off a birth certificate. The easiest thing to do is likely you adopting the child. That's going to take time but, if you are approved to adopt and do, you don't have to worry about the sperm donor anymore.
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SFC Kelly Fuerhoff
SFC Kelly Fuerhoff
4 y
Capt Gregory Prickett I mean if the guy didn't establish paternity per that state laws he may not have any rights. It just depends on the state.

For short term she could get a custody order,but for the long term, it will be easier if he adopts because the kid doesn't know the sperm donor. He probably is the only dad the kid knows. And if he adopts, they never have to deal with the sperm donor again.
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