Posted on Oct 8, 2016
SN Kevin Neff
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I'm a newlywed. My wife has never been away from me for a period of time, but I'm used to being away from loved ones. She's clingy, but she grasping the idea of that I may be away for a while. How did you deal with it when you are your spouse went away for a while? I don't want her to succumb to separation anxiety because she couldn't handle being apart.
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Responses: 19
Col Rebecca Lorraine
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Hey Kevin, I'm sorry you are experiencing difficulty in this, but I would encourage her to work, build her own life and not be emotionally so dependent on you. If she has a close friend or family, that can help her with loneliness. I also took on hobbies and projects that got me thinking of other things. Stay in touch and tell her your proud of whatever she decides. Maturity and being young newlyweds can make this worse, but your relationship can grow if you work on the separation piece.
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SN Kevin Neff
SN Kevin Neff
>1 y
Hopefully that's something I can get her to work on. I hopefully want to be somewhere where she'll have support close by so she wouldn't have to deal with it by herself.
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Col Rebecca Lorraine
Col Rebecca Lorraine
>1 y
SN Kevin Neff - Having a support system is helpful, but she has to step out and look for things that she can create, meet people and build her confidence. Best wishes, and maybe others will have some advice for you.
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Sgt Wayne Wood
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Tread carefully... i was four months late for my WEDDING.... cutoff... that was not a good start.
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SPC Ross Temple
SPC Ross Temple
>1 y
LOL life is funny
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Sgt Wayne Wood
Sgt Wayne Wood
>1 y
Yeah... my future first wife was not amused... in the subsequent 3years of the marriage we were only together an aggregate total of 13 months... 50% absent. If the Marines wanted you to have a wife, they'd issue one. If you are subject ti frequent or long deployments think about this... God/church community will help.
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Lt Col John (Jack) Christensen
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It will be easy for you, you'll be too busy to dwell on separation. You wife needs to rely on the support groups available at your home station. Don't know what you living situation is (on or off base) but if she is on base there will be lots of support from wives who are in the same boat. On base there will be lots of stopping by to see how you're doing etc., living off base this still will happen but perhaps not as often. She needs to become active in wives clubs, hobbies, etc. and if she works it's a good chance to work on refining her job skills. In today's world of internet and cell phones you will still be able to communicate regularly, not like when I was deployed, so it's not like you'll never be able to talk with each other.
Its really a great chance for her to learn that she can be self sufficient. You should encourage her to start working on some project that the two of you may have been planning. My wife actually planned and completed finishing of a basement while I was on a remote assignment. Biggest thing is your attitudes, you both need to think of the separation as a challenge, not some awful thing that you must endure.
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