Is it ok for veterans to use their old rank, if others address them by it?

WW II Vets are always addressed as Sir/Ma'am
Korean War Vets are always addressed as Sir/Ma'am

Any Officer will be greeted with the proper greeting.... All the Way Sir/Ma'am
Any Senior NCO will be greeted with the proper greeting.... Airborne
Any questions
Airborne

All correspondence I receive from the Army and the VA addresses me as SFC (Retired). On the civilian side of my life, I have worked for two Chief Judges who were in the Army during Vietnam. Both call me Sergeant every time they see, call, or email me. It's their way of showing respect for the rank I earned while serving our great nation.

Accept it and be grateful someone recognizes it. Most don't.

I think people do it out of respect. However, I think the most respectable thing for you to do would to be transparent with her. If you wish to be addressed by your name, then let her know that. Honestly really is this best policy.

I work with new ppl all the time. I introduce myself as James. If I am lucky enough to catch a vet/retiree/ reservist/guardsman, I love to chat about the military. I usually call them rank & last name after that. It's a courtesy title among warriors. Do I expect civilians who have never served to know or care? Sure don't. Ours is a Brother (and Sister) hood that we share. Do I ever put my rank down on correspondence (or my MBA for that matter)? No, why would I?

#1. You are a civilian, not under the UCMJ. #2. You legitimately earned the rank Sergeant. (And didn't buy a Big Chicken Dinner). #3. It a courtesy title. So #4. If you want to be Sergeant X, be SGT X. If not don't. #5. Did I mention it's a courtesy title?

I would say it is a polite sign of respect Hooah!

After you pass away, as an honorably discharged veteran or retiree, you are entitled to a free headstone or grave marker, care of the USG, which will be delivered to your next of kin.
That gift/benefit/entitlement will have your full name, dates of birth/death, your highest rank and military service, and any conflicts that occurred while you were serving.
So, long after your death, you will be referred to by your rank. Now that’s eternal!

Depends. If you're a defense contractor and attempting to influence your Department of Defense client by letting them know you're a veteran/retiree to gain favor, than no. Real world example; We had a recently retired Air Force Colonel (O-6) obtain a job with a defense contractor that was doing work for the Air Force. The retired O-6 working for the contractor was ok since he waited long enough and didn't work in the program that he managed as a military member.

The problem was when he referred to himself as Joe Smith, Col, USAF, Retired instead of Joe Smith, Project Manager, XYZ Corp in official email traffic. The Contracting Officer, a smart man, promptly told him to stop using his military rank in emails that pertained to contractual issues. To be fair, the retired O-6 did a good job and finished job on time and within budget. They let him go when his old military contacts retired and he stopped bringing in more work to the company.

Another violation I noticed when traveling to a military base. The base had a billboard where they announced Colonel/Generals/High Ranking civilians that were visiting base for work purposes. They had a retired general who became an executive with a large defense contractor working for the same service. The billboard said "Doug Jones, MGen USAF (Retired) Director of X-55 Fighter Operations XYZ Corporation. That's wrong for a retired flag officer obviously using his rank to gain influence and profit for a private corporation that had a huge contract with the same service he retired from.

I'm going to agree with all of the posts I have read thus far. It's yours, you did earn it.

That being said, in the civy world, I am not going to call people by their rank (can thank the bad ones for that, even though the vast majority are good) unless I'm in a situation where it is called for.

I was a the Quartermaster Symposium in Ft Lee a few years ago as a representative for the company I worked for at the time. Anyone I spoke to I was using their rank as I was on their grounds, not at the mall. Just a simple sign of respect and professionalism that fit the circumstances.

It's definitely a respect thing. You don't have to sign with the tank you were. They still know who you are and it sounds like they are just trying to respect you and your service.